Kiki spills the tea on her recent Watch What Happens Live! appearance in which Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Kathy Hilton mistook award-winning artist Lizzo for the fictional character Precious. Plus, the hosts react to Jennette McCurdy’s new book, I’m Glad My Mom Died, and discuss the decades-long mistreatment of child actors in Hollywood. And, Mohanad reveals a hot (or – freezing cold, rather) take on this week’s I’m Sorry, But… segment that leaves Hoja questioning everything she knows.
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Hoja Lopez, Mohanad Elshieky, Kiki Monique
Kiki Monique 00:00
Hi I’m Kiki Monique. And this is I’M SORRY, the unapologetic show about apologies. And this week, it’s so hot outside. I’ve literally had a Slurpee every single day, sometimes two in a day. And that’s how the rest of the August is gonna go. And I have no regrets about it.
Mohanad Elshieky 00:22
That sounds good to me. Yeah, well, this is Mohanad Elshieky, and this week, I’m doing a lot of traveling and excited to eat airport foods, it’s gonna be so much fun for me.
Hoja Lopez 00:33
And it’s gonna be very, very, very delicious. And then I am Hoja Lopez. And this week, I am surrounded by trash, essentially, because I’ve been doing a cleaning of my entire home. And you know, it always gets worse before it gets better. And boy, does it get really fucking bad before you start throwing away. So anyways, if anybody comes over to my house right now, they will absolutely assume that I’m profoundly in a mental illness, but it’ll be better soon.
Kiki Monique 01:01
You know, I mean, hoarders is it’s a thing. I mean, I think we just discovered that our ex-President 45 might be a hoarder, you know? He got raided and I hear there was an entire room. Am I getting this right? Is there a room devoted to Charles Barkley or something along those lines? I’m pretty sure. There was a sports room. There was collectibles basically in a room of collectibles. It sounded a little hoarder-ish, you know?
Mohanad Elshieky 01:31
Yeah, this FBI raid. I think it should. I hope it was filmed because I have a place for it to be shown, which is a special episode on MTV room Raiders.
Hoja Lopez 01:49
Would pay to watch that.
Mohanad Elshieky 01:50
It’s a great show. I mean, it’s disgusting. It’s bad. I don’t know why people agree to be on it. A lot of MTV shows from the past. I have no idea why people consent to be on them. For example, NEXT, greatest dating show ever. My mom, it’s so much is happening there.
Kiki Monique 02:07
I’m sorry. To me. That was the golden error of reality television.
Hoja Lopez 02:13
Mohanad Elshieky 02:15
100%. I loved watching it. I just do not understand why people agree to be on it. That was hoof. Insane.
Hoja Lopez 02:23
What was the one where they got off the bus? That was next. Oh my god. Okay. Okay. I remember watching that one from Venezuela. And per usual, I was like, man, American people are crazy. What is happening in that country? What is going on?
Mohanad Elshieky 02:41
Yeah, for the longest time, I thought that was the only way to date in the US. You know, I moved here and I just hung out by bus stations.
Kiki Monique 02:50
I would watch that show because like, I only wanted to see the person who wasn’t even allowed to step their toe onto the grass like the person before they can even get a foot off the bus was like next, because if you’re that far away, the person says next. Oh, man, that has got to be not a great feeling.
Mohanad Elshieky 03:06
It’s soul crushing. It is soul crushing. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Well, speaking about problematic shows and problematic stuff. And all of that.
Mohanad Elshieky 03:16
I have an opinion this week, which you know, every week we do and I’m sorry, but where we, you know, reveal our controversial opinions two weeks ago. I said, how much I hate iced coffee. So I’m going to Portland, you know, I’m going to Portland this week. And one of my friends were like, oh, yeah, you’re gonna be here. Let’s go. And you know, let’s go to a lake.
Hoja Lopez 03:41
Okay. I already know this is directed at me. I have to make the disclaimer that Mo literally texted me this morning. And he’s like, this has nothing to do with you. I hope you take no offense. And I was like, about what? And then said nothing else.
Mohanad Elshieky 03:56
Here’s the thing. Okay, I’m ready to admit, if my friends are listening, every time we went to a lake, I hated it so much. I hate swimming in lakes. I think they’re so cold and it’s truly unethical of anyone to be like, go swimming or kids like here’s the thing, even you never get used to it. You never get used to how cold the water is. And you’re freezing the whole time. And it’s not a good time. And I don’t know why everyone in Oregon loves this ship. I think people should only swim in the sea in the ocean. And it has to be warm as well. You know like Pacific Ocean does not count in like Cannon Beach and all of that stuff. Because it’s also freezing cold. It should be warm. That’s why I think the Mediterranean like sea is the best because it’s you know, it’s warm is beautiful. Lakes are weird.
Kiki Monique 04:53
I can honestly say I have never ever swam in a lake. And I think that has more to do with the fact that I, I can swim. But I don’t know. I feel like I won’t float in the lake. I feel like you have to be a very strong swimmer for Lake life swimming because I just feel like there’s no saltwater. There’s no buoyancy. Like, I don’t know if I can swim in a lake. I don’t know.
Hoja Lopez 05:19
I’m going to tell you right now, you both seem like aliens that have come down to earth, describing what a lake is like, Okay? Lakes are beautiful. They’re gorgeous. They’re idyllic. And the cold water just jars, your organs in your life, like up and awake and makes you feel amazing. I’m going to tell you both. I think you’re this is the wrongest that you’ve ever been. I actually think Mo, you know; I prefer like, I think to an ocean. I love an ocean too. Don’t get me wrong, but I mean, chillin on a dock, hanging out with some old dudes fishing, and then getting in the lake afterwards. That’s what I thought the American experience was. That’s why I moved here.
Kiki Monique 05:59
Lake Placid? Or love […] Betty White. You haven’t seen Lake Placid? Go ahead and watch Lake Placid. And then you come back and tell me if you think [..]
Hoja Lopez 06:09
Have you seen jaws? Have you seen a perfect storm? Have you seen all of those Alaska fishing shows?
Mohanad Elshieky 06:20
Hoja, there is literally so many horror movies as the I can talk about that has to do with lakes and creature that lives in lakes. I was just wrong. Also sharks. What kind of seas have you been going to?
Hoja Lopez 06:37
It’s many seas many of them. Also no hurricanes, tsunamis, no typhoons, and yeah, no shark attacks. Okay. Oh, there’s a shark in North Carolina. There are sharks in North Carolina. It’s a lovely place. Okay. It’s a lovely state and you would love it if you went, this is a full on Agree to disagree. I feel this is a full on. This is a lot. I’m gonna have to really digest this and go home and take this and commune with God about this. And I’m gonna pray for the both of you.
Kiki Monique 07:15
I really appreciate the children actors who are coming forward now that there was a documentary HBO released I think it was like during lockdown like maybe in 2020 or 2021. Called like showbiz kids, they had like Evan Rachel woods, and it had I think it was directed by like Alex Winter, and you know, it had, you know, a few child stars and just talking about like the industry and you know, just like how it can just eat you up. And then obviously, there was just recently the release of that book by Jeanette McCurdy, who was the star of iCarly went on to star in Sam and Cat with Ariana Grande these Nickelodeon series. And obviously, the title of the book are already cat, you know, catches you because you’re like, I think it’s called, I’m glad my mom died. Right? And you’re like, whoa, that’s really major. But, you know, I’m still I actually downloaded the audible, so I haven’t listened to the full book yet. But just from like, the interviews, she’s done. Whoa, I mean, it sounds like, you know, her mom was like, living vicariously through her. And then just like, you know, and she ended up with all of these, you know, this disordered eating and ended up in positions with adults that she didn’t feel comfortable with. And, yeah, I mean, I just think there’s a lot to say when, you know, you can turn out one way, or, you know, you can get help, and then end up with Jeanette and healing, you know?
Hoja Lopez 08:42
Yeah, it’s crazy, because it really does seem like a combination of the parent in the studio, because those are the two entities that it takes in order for a kid to be put in situations like that. And I think we’ve heard like, kind of like that term emancipation and all these like, very specific terms that we’ve been hearing for, for fucking ever around child stars. And like Laura Dern was emancipated. I know Drew Barrymore, Courtney Love and then Courtney love’s daughter was also emancipated. There is a clear history of like, kind of parents and studios taking advantage of kids. And it’s not a conversation that’s been kind of well known. And I think definitely this book is really bringing it to the forefront because he talks about Nickelodeon too. Part of the book or what she gets interviewed about is that $300,000 Sort of like hush money essentially to not speak about her experiences at Nickelodeon. And man, I’m fucking so sad that it happened to her but also I don’t want like my childhood to get tainted, like I we enjoyed that shit and it sucks that now like every time I watch rug rats or think about that time on the other end of that is a group of like kids who We’re not being treated fairly and we’re being exploited, you know, that’s a fucking bummer.
Kiki Monique 10:05
It is a bummer. But you know, I’ve gone back and forth in my head about this, especially, you know, like, I grew up with the Cosby Show. And obviously, that’s its own thing. I think that there is a way that, you know, kids can still watch The Cosby Show and get the lessons out of it. And it still be, you know, because it was still a good program at the end of the day. And we can distance ourselves from that. But yeah, you know, I’m, it’s not surprising now, obviously, as an adult to know that the kids were going through this because like, I just, you know, it’s so funny that you talk about emancipation, because I remember as a kid, even, I was aware of these emancipation, because I read a lot of gossip mags, I was always in the business, my mom would get, like, everything delivered to the house, and I would just go through it. And I remember being like, I’m gonna get emancipated from my parents, like, it was like, I mean, I really thought I was like, I was like, as soon as I can, I’m gonna do my own thing, because it did seem like a cool thing to do. Now, the fucked up part was a lot of not a lot, but some of the times these kids were getting emancipated solely because they couldn’t trust their parents with their money. And it was like, the only way that they were gonna have a future and like, be able to, like, take care of their own money and hand it to like a guardian that wasn’t going to take advantage of them.
Hoja Lopez 11:19
Yeah, I was reading about them just in reading about Jennette McCurdy. And so Laura Dern that example is and also like Alicia Silverstone is also emancipated. But they talk about emancipation as a way to get around child labor laws. And so that happened a lot in the 90s, and 80s. Because essentially, once you’re sort of declared an adult, then you no longer have to abide by the amount of hours that children have to work. And so studios will facilitate emancipation, in order to allow children essentially, to work more hours. And the parents would say, yes, the parents would agree to it, the child would still live with their parents, they would still be under, technically under the scope of that parent emotionally. But under the law, they weren’t considered adults. So even on emancipation on the good side on the idea of like, they’re doing it even, not because there’s a situation at home, there’s still this fucked up aspect of it, that now these kids don’t have to go to school and they still have to work full time as an adult.
Mohanad Elshieky 12:25
No, it’s just a concept is insane. To me, the whole just, like, want to live your dream through your kids. Like here’s my thing, like, if you still have dreams, just, I don’t know, go out there and make them happen. Do not […] to have kids and be like, Okay, I’m gonna use you as a tool. Like, it’s I mean, especially like a big conversation, obviously, you know, like, how like, we treat kids and like what we see like parenting is like, Dude, I mean, like, these kids do not belong to you.
Kiki Monique 12:56
Oh, but I will say it’s, it’s what I love about auntie life is going to my friend’s house, you do have kids and you know, if I need to sell to from the fridge, their little legs love to run over and do it. I’m just saying. There’s like, say don’t use kids as a tool. I’m like, oh, but you know, sometimes I need my phone plugged in. And I’m like, really in the middle of a show and like, they love doing things.
Mohanad Elshieky 13:19
I’m the older brother, you know, like and I asked my siblings to do so much things for me grab this do this and all that. Yeah, kids love this shit. Like they love be like feeling useful. I’m like, oh, just makes me an adult and everything. But I think it’s just the concept of just like taking their whole childhood away from them. And being like, Okay, you work now only 40 hours a week. You just you work all day long. The summer. Yes, we’re going to work too, it’s insane.
Kiki Monique 13:47
Especially in you know, in Jeanette McCurdy place because she was paying the bills. You know, if your kid is paying your electric bill paying your mortgage paying your car note. Okay, then we have a problem, right?
Mohanad Elshieky 14:00
Yeah, you’re the child here. They’re the parent.
Hoja Lopez 14:03
Even like the most recent version of it wasn’t even that long ago, like Ariel Winter from Modern Family was another person who emancipated from her mom and from her family ended up like living with her sister. But I remember when that stuff was coming out, I just was like, what is happening inside of a home that you’re making that much money and still there’s an expectation there like something is going so wrong, like that kind of abuse stuff. It doesn’t just happen in like, you know, poverty stricken sort of like areas. It’s, uh, it’s part of the like, condition sometimes of being a kid, but, I mean, I didn’t have necessarily like an idyllic childhood, but I didn’t have to fucking work. You know, like, that’s, I didn’t have to do any of that shit. And I can’t even imagine. Yeah, that sounds crazy.
Mohanad Elshieky 14:54
Yeah, and I guess it’s not you know, for a lot of like the cases we’ve been seeing lately and people of course, speaking government stuff, it’s not just the working all the time and not having a child is like, you know, there’s abuse and there’s, you know, creators making them like drink consent and like all of this shit where you like, become less of a human and more of, you know, you’re just an object they’re just using to make money at this point, no matter what happens, and you’re being forced to act like an adult, and you start to think that you’re an adult, even though you’re not.
Hoja Lopez 15:29
Yeah, that really reminds me of like, you know what to bring a true moment of joy is, let’s all remember that Drew Barrymore put out that TikTok in that video of her in the rain, with a wet hair, just looking out and telling people to go feel the rain. And Drew Barrymore was a child actor with a really fucked up upbringing. And I am very happy that Drew Barrymore feels good right now.
Mohanad Elshieky 16:14
Well, I mean, there are like so many insane things happening this week. And I mean, Kiki, you might want to speak to this one since I think you were at the recording.
Kiki Monique 16:26
So yeah, I was on Watch What Happens Live last week. And so yeah, basically, there’s always an after show, like there’s usually like, whatever’s airing that night, watch what happens after show will normally have one or two guests from that show, just there to answer questions about the show.
Hoja Lopez 16:48
You were there for this, Kiki?
Kiki Monique 16:50
No, basically, they do have an audience now, but they have people who ask questions over virtual screens. So I was in Los Angeles at tapes in New York. So I was able to just, you know, Skype in and ask my question. So the episode that I was on was with Kathy Hilton and Crystal Kung Minkoff, who are on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. And so you get to like the Great, the cool thing is, is like, while it’s filming, you’re getting to watch the show on your own screen, you know, before you come up for your question. So you know, we’re watching the whole thing. And they’re there. All they do is play games, they play a lot of games and ask questions, or whatever. So they’re playing this game about like, can you, do you recognize this person, and they did that game with Kathy Hilton, because it’s this ongoing joke on the show, about how she never recognizes people because one time she saw Garcelle, who is a black, tall black woman, and she thought she was her sister, Kyle, who is a short white woman. Okay. So like, that is how big her vision is. And like, at one time, she you know, she reached into a, you know, to get like a she thought it was like a Red Bull or something. And she was drinking, you know, like an alcoholic, like a truly or something like that. Like she just has really, really bad vision. So it’s been on this ongoing joke. So right before she they’re playing this game, and they put up a bunch of different people like it, she didn’t recognize a lot of them. But she kind of recognized Keanu Reeves, but didn’t know his name. And, you know, she didn’t know you know, any of these people. It gets to Lizzo. And she says Precious, which, as we know, is a fictional character from the Lee Daniels film, and not even, you know, the real actresses name, which is, you know, Gabourey Sidibe. And so immediately, like, I’m like, you know, I immediately go like, I’m like, you know, gasp, right?
Hoja Lopez 18:53
Can they hear you gasp?
Kiki Monique 18:55
Maybe the people in the production can but I think I’m not on camera yet. So nobody, you know, can see me on TV. And I, you know, I’m just stunned and you know, they pan over. And obviously, everyone sort of in the audience is like laughing and whatever. And, you know, Crystal tries to make it better. Like, oh, you know, and so people got really riled up and look, rightfully so. There is obviously a history where, you know, the whole thing of all black people look alike on top of it, the fact that every larger black woman is called precious is like, that’s just, it’s so bad, right? It’s so bad. In that moment, though, I legitimately was like, I don’t think she knew who Lizzo was because I don’t think she’s not aware of pop culture in any way, shape, or form. And I legitimately don’t think she knew who Lizzo was. It was just not great that she defaulted to the only, you know, larger black woman that was in her head because that’s what made it so bad, right? Because on top of the fact that it’s not even a real person. It’s a character I mean, look, I, to me the reason, the only reason it got even more cringy is because leading up to Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. You know all the Bravo accounts are wanting to know what’s happening while it’s filming. And there’s a rumor that’s been going around that while the cast was in Aspen that Kathy said some racist and homophobic things allegedly Kathy adamantly denies this but people are saying this happen we don’t know we’re so everybody’s waiting for this Aspen trip which should be coming any episode now. And so I just sat there and thought was like this is not this is not how you want to lead into this because I don’t know how this Aspen trip is gonna go. But if this is how it where it started, I’m like, ooh, Cathy’s team is going to be you know, hard at work. So it was just so anyways, I will say this you know, I thought Mohanad I think you would appreciate it like immediately my first reaction was because I was coming up right after that to ask the question I was the first person,
Mohanad Elshieky 21:04
That was after?
Kiki Monique 21:06
Exactly and the first person she sees is another big black woman after that this just happened and so my immediate reaction was I wanted to get on and be like, Hi Kathy. It’s me Precious but like I was like, You know what? No, that’s I was like don’t do that burn
Hoja Lopez 21:25
Kiki you would have killed America would be talking about you right now.
Mohanad Elshieky 21:33
You still got to do it. I mean yeah, truly even without you saying it, this could have gone in so many wrong ways. He would have been I feel like it would have to go to a whole new level if she looked at the looked at you and thought now she was doing the right thing was like Lizzo I am very sorry, I’m very sorry.
Kiki Monique 21:57
Maybe that’s why because when I came up on the screen. What if she didn’t think I was Lizzo?
Hoja Lopez 22:14
I know this is bad, but why do I have like a soft spot for that? Why do we have a spouse like why is this bringing up like this old cute lady vibes for me? What am I, am I just so wrong? What’s going on?
Mohanad Elshieky 22:36
Yeah, I mean, you do like swimming in cold lakes.
Hoja Lopez 22:44
Throwing it in my face.
Mohanad Elshieky 22:46
I mean, look at Macedonia your face I’m just trying to shock your system, since that’s something you like.
Hoja Lopez 22:52
Why have podcast co-host and friends when you can have enemies like this? Why? Why even be close to people when they just rip on you day and night? The both of you have taken this podcast as a platform to ruin my life. And I just want to know that it will not go unnoticed. I’m plotting a very slow revenge it’s gonna take forever from now on it might actually be imperceptible.
Mohanad Elshieky 23:41
Talking about friends who flip on other friends.
Hoja Lopez 23:45
I’m gonna call you. I’m gonna call you Mohanad transition Elshieky. That’s gonna be your middle fucking name. Go.
Mohanad Elshieky 23:53
Well, yeah, cuz we’re gonna talk about also what happened this week with Laura Ingraham.
Hoja Lopez 24:00
Oh, man. Go ahead. I can’t wait.
Mohanad Elshieky 24:05
Yeah, yeah. Which makes me truly honestly like, Let’s pump some money into making Trump think he should run because I want the two I want him and Ron to really go at it. I want the whole thing to get It’s so crazy and saying between the two of them that they’re like, and we’ll just be like, look over there. Look over there don’t see us bringing these like totally normal candidates that are like.
Mohanad Elshieky 24:05
She said that Americans are exhausted from political conflict. And I might think it’s time to turn the page on Trump. And I cannot imagine doing too many crimes that Fox News is like, I don’t think we can do this anymore. They were like yeah, we’re not you know, we’re not into you anymore. We literally found a guy who’s also from Florida, originally from Florida. As crazy as you are maybe even more. And we’re just gonna go with that, which is, you know, governor of Florida. Ron DeSantis.
Mohanad Elshieky 25:10
I agree with you. No, I honestly think I mean, whoever is in charge of, you know, campaigning in, like, within the Democratic Party like, this is what you should be doing, you should be like, you should be like, Oh, they’re trying to replace you with another, another younger, more crazy and crazier version of yourself. I wanted to stand for that. What are you, a child?
Kiki Monique 25:35
You know, it’s so sad to that you say it has to be the Democratic Party, because like, I also have lost faith there. And I’m like, the fact that we can’t have an independent that we think could like, legitimately win makes me so sad. Like, how did we get to this place where like, literally only two parties constantly decide our fate every term.
Mohanad Elshieky 25:57
know, I know. I think the worst part about it is that every time I mean, I know, there was like other parties, supposedly, you know, and they ran and you know, but you don’t have like that big of a base and all of that. And, you know, but then you have like someone like Andrew Yang right now, who was like trying to start the forward party. And I’m just like, my man is at with all due respect, you’re a clown.
Kiki Monique 26:25
With all due respect always leads to the most disrespectful thing ever.
Mohanad Elshieky 26:33
To me like Andrew Yang, and just like if a politician was an NFT, you know, it’s like, I don’t understand what is it that you’re doing or what you’re trying to accomplish? And I know that the people who like you are, you know, think they’re smart. And also like, so your version of what a third political party is, is what if Democrats and Republicans got together? And they had no beliefs? They just believed in nothing? Is that what we’re saying? Yeah, essentially, yeah. Yeah. Cuz he was asked on I believe it was CNN, about like, what is the forward party his party’s name, like stance on like Roe v. Wade, and he just did not give an answer. He was just like; we’re just trying to get something that all Americans can agree on. I’m just like, you already lost my man. Like, what are you even talking about?
Kiki Monique 27:25
What happened to Andrew? I felt like he came out like so strong. And then what happened because last time I looked, I’m like, you’re a hot mess.
Mohanad Elshieky 27:33
100% like this is the craziest story because like, remember, like, he ran to become the mayor of New York City. And he was on top. He was keen on it. He literally ruined his whole campaign by tweeting every day, he would read something and lose more support. He had the votes, he was gonna win this. And he ruined it by literally just everyday tweeting the most insane shit, trying to be relatable, trying to be fun. And he is not any of these things. None of them. Yeah. And then he lost. Like, it’s just the way he talks about everything. Makes no sense to me. Like, do you remember when he was running to become the mayor of New York City, and the way he like he always sounded like he read the Wikipedia page of New York City and just went for it.
Hoja Lopez 28:24
He also was like, a boss at your corporate financial job who really wants to be cool with the young people kind of, but you know that this dude is your boss. So you still not gonna like welcome him into your fucking friend group. But he does things out at happy hour saying weird shit. That’s Andrew Yang to me. Personality wise.
Mohanad Elshieky 28:45
He always sounds like he’s on Shark Tank. goes out. Like when he was running for mayor. He just goes on and he’s like, okay, sharks. Hear me out. The city is big. It never sleeps. We call it the Big Apple. There are rats there. And there is a subway. It’s hot. But it doesn’t make any sense. Sharks, New York City. And it was like, bro, shut the fuck up.
Kiki Monique 29:09
I remember that the New York Times had asked all of the candidates what their favorite bagel orders were at. I don’t remember what Andrews was, but I’m pretty sure that’s probably where I started judging him because I’m pretty sure it was terrible.
Mohanad Elshieky 29:22
Well, remember when they asked him what’s his favorite subway station was? He said Times Square.
Kiki Monique 29:30
So then most likely, he chose like cinnamon raisin bagel. I don’t even know if he did but he probably just something psychotic.
Hoja Lopez 29:37
Mohanad Elshieky 29:39
Yeah. Well, I mean, we had so many people we talked about today who need to apologize, which, you know, moves us to our best segment. I’d say, which is sorry, not sorry, where we either apologize to someone or we demand that apology and like every week, I’m gonna ask Hoja to go first.
Hoja Lopez 29:59
Yes, I I’m going I’m cutting straight to the chase. I would like an apology from Kombucha . And I would like an apology from Kombucha. Because, honestly, it could be anything. I could open up a Kombucha from one brand and it could be a flat, weird, acidic tasting mushroom thing, all the way to it could be essentially a sparkling soda with raspberry inside of it. And the truth is, I need some more uniformity around what we call a kombucha and what is not a kombucha? Because my expectation is one thing and I am every single time disappointed if it’s orange juice, I know what I’m gonna get. If it’s a Diet Coke, I know what it’s about to taste like, a Kombucha, I have no fucking clue what I’m about to put in my goddamn mouth. So I would like an apology from that industry. And I would like for there to be some regulations and just some commitments around, you know, a little bit of uniformity as to what we’re calling it. And that is my sorry not sorry of the week.
Mohanad Elshieky 31:01
100%, that being said, I’ve only tried to come Kombucha and maybe look once or twice in my life again, with the caveat that I used to live in Portland, Oregon. So I had to I was forced.
Hoja Lopez 31:12
It’s the national beverage of Portland.
Mohanad Elshieky 31:14
And I could never get into it. It just you know, and, and it’s funny because they tried to get you into it by describing what it is. And I’m just like, this is bad advertising. You’re making it sound very bad.
Kiki Monique 31:28
I feel like just in general saying you know; with Kim Bucha I never know what I’m putting my mouth. I feel like that just goes across the board with confusion because I’m like, every time I’m like, I’m like everyone’s drinking it so cannot know. I can’t.
Mohanad Elshieky 31:41
Kiki, what’s yours this week?
Kiki Monique 31:44
I think we’re just apologizing to products this week. Because, you know, what, apologies from products this week, because I actually want an apology from all of the cheap, crappy luggage that I’ve had over the years because it’s like, I feel like I’ve gotten so many different types of bags and like, it’s just like, even when I pay a lot of money for them, they like fall apart. Or it’s like they just they all look the same. I have to check baggage and go to like a carousel like, I never know which one is mine. But like I finally, finally, feel like an adult because I have gotten a piece of luggage that I’m so excited about I’m so excited to take it places it is like I’m calling it like the Goldilocks of luggage because it’s like it’s not too pricey. It doesn’t you know has doesn’t have the look of others it’s just like it’s just right. And it’s ironic that I’m calling it the Goldilocks of luggage because I got it in gold you know cuz I’m I am I am officially a golden girl and I’ve decided that you know I was on the website for hours it’s this line called cow pack. And it’s really cool because you know, first of all, I lately have been really super conscious of where I spend my money lately because I want to make sure it’s going to like a good place it’s not you know being used for harm. And so Cal pack is actually it’s like an AAPI own brand so already loving that. And I did like a little bit of a dive on the history of the company and its family owned. It was started by this couple in LA really cute backstory and actually like they were one of the first companies to bring hard-shell rolling suitcases to the United States which is wild because that’s like the standard now. Yeah so like for them to be one of the first is like pretty cool but I ended up spending like so many hours on the website just because they had so many different options. I was like okay, I kind of love you know, this you know orange one and I kind of love this you know, rose gold one that has like the opening that you put your laptop in and so anyways I ended up deciding on this cute you know carry on rolling gold bag which I love I cannot wait. And you know I love having like my favorite airport year is like crossbody like I love cry I either do a bag or crossbody bag but I tend to like crossbody so that I can even have easy access to like my laptop or my iPad or my phone just like really quickly right there as I’m going through the airport. And what’s so cool about this is like so this I got to cheat a one because I felt like that went with my gold my gold bag. And if I’m not using it like let’s say I decide to put the laptop you know like somewhere else. I can fold this bag up it’s like a huge duffel bag but it folds up into a square the size that I can just hold in my hand like it’s super and like so the website they have like all of these different like accessories like you know different cubes you know for packing you know clears cosmetic cases. They even have like electronics organizer so you know, like put your headphones but your cords, ports, all those things. Everything is like neat and tucked away. I really love it. So anyways, calpak, it’s calpaktravel.com/imsorry. Use code I’m sorry, get 10% off. So worth it. I love it. It’s like it’s my new, I think I will say hands down my favorite piece of luggage I’ve ever owned.
Hoja Lopez 35:14
Maybe y’all could go to a lake with one.
Mohanad Elshieky 35:20
Why would you go to a lake with a carry on?
Hoja Lopez 35:25
A vacation, Mo, god. say you’re sorry not sorry. Say yours?
Mohanad Elshieky 35:32
You need to find God. Yeah, you know what? I didn’t really know Kiki was talking about the luggage. I that inspired my Sorry, not sorry. Because I you know, I also got this piece of luggage, which is great because I’m traveling a lot for comedy and I had this carry on that I took with me and I want to apologize to everyone at LaGuardia and JFK specifically. The carry on I have is insane. Like literally like the noise that it makes is unethical.
Hoja Lopez 36:11
It’s noise pollution. you’re apologizing for noise pollution?
Mohanad Elshieky 36:15
Exactly. Yeah. Especially what like, you know, a name like Mohanad Elshieky, I’m not trying to bring more attention to me at the airport.
Kiki Monique 36:23
Yeah. Out Loud bags and Mohana Yeah, don’t go hand. Exactly.
Mohanad Elshieky 36:26
Yeah. You know, I’m already in there. Like, you know, they’re like, please keep it together list. And, yeah, so, I mean, I got I got the carry on from calpack. I got it in black, obviously, because I was like, I just wanted to, I don’t want to stand out. But also it’s a gray color. And I’m traveling tomorrow and I cannot wait to just go smoothly. I think I might also do the thing because I like it so much. You know, like when TSA put your luggage on the side because they found something in it. Like something very dangerous. Like, I don’t know, toothpaste, bottle of water. Exactly. I might just put like a big toothpaste in it. So when they put it on the side and they’re like, and they asked who does this carry on belong to? I can be like, it’s me.
Kiki Monique 37:21
Cuz he might want to show it off. I you know, that’s a good idea. Because I do want to show my you know, like, my gold is off. I want to open it up. I want people to peek around under the hood. Yeah, I hope we have a problem. Because it’s too cute. So everyone, yeah, get their calpack, go to calpack, use code, imsorry, and get our calpacks vand let’s make trouble.
Mohanad Elshieky 37:45
And I’m gonna announce that tomorrow at the TSA line. I’m gonna be like, calpacktravel.com/ imsorry, called I’m sorry for 10% off and the TSA agent what are even talking about and I’m just like, I just say in the code is I’m sorry for 10% off. Do you have hearing problems, buddy?
Hoja Lopez 38:06
We’re gonna be fucking unbearable at the airport. We’re gonna be unbearable. We’re gonna make noise. I’m gonna make a big stink and deal about this fucking this carry on that I have. I’m extremely excited about it. Literally, I haven’t even put it away. I just have it in my living room so I can stare at it. Because I know I’m leaving in like two weeks. And so I don’t need to put it away. I’ll just stare at it.
Kiki Monique 38:35
Well, until next week,
Hoja Lopez 38:37
I’M SORRY is a Lemonada Media Original. The show is produced by Alex McOwen, supervising producer is Kryssy Pease. Our executive producers are Stephanie Wittels Wachs and Jessica Cordova Kramer. Our mix is by Kat Yore and theme music was composed by Xander Singh. If you like this show, please rate and review. And please don’t cancel us. You can find out more about our show at @LemonadaMedia on all social platforms, or follow us on Instagram at @imsorry_podcast. We’ll be back next week and until then be nice, play fair and always say I’m sorry. Thanks for listening!