Jon Gabrus Wants To Be Tropical Santa
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Jon Gabrus can’t wait to be an off-the-grid, shirtless retiree living on a tropical island, and he tells aunties how little lifestyle changes are inching him there. Some new camping gear is bringing this Long Island boy back in touch with his outdoorsy roots. Simultaneously, he’s shirking formality rules with some comfy pants that you can’t even tell are elastic. Plus, he shares some “Gabrus math” about why you should wear speedos (if it makes you feel better). This episode was recorded prior to the end of the Writer’s Guild of America strike.
Please note, Add To Cart contains mature themes and may not be appropriate for all listeners.
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- Jon got the Rumpl blanket from his Instagram algorithm
- The Topo Dirt Pants are comfortable yet classy
- Roark sells comfy joggers and has great prints
- Jon is unapologetically wearing Budgy Smuggler at the pool and we’re here for it
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Transcript
SPEAKERS
Kulap Vilaysack, SuChin Pak, Jon Gabrus
SuChin Pak 00:10
I don’t know what it is. I, my heart is beating 10,000 miles a minute. Maybe because of our guests, but I just feel like there’s like an energy. I don’t know. I don’t know if there’s three moons out. I don’t know if it’s Capricorn I haven’t slept I don’t feel.
Kulap Vilaysack 00:29
That’s it.
SuChin Pak 00:29
I don’t know what is happening, but I’m tired. I haven’t slept. But I’m also not tired. My vision is blurry on and I’m sorry. Let, Ku you start the show? Apologize.
Kulap Vilaysack 00:45
Welcome back to Add To Cart. I’m auntie Kuku Vilaysack. I think all of my body’s in retrograde
SuChin Pak 00:55
Yes, that’s right. I am sitting here once again, and head to toe pajama sets. I have not stopped. This is my life. And today our guests I didn’t even think about it when I put my outfit on. Because usually I like to, you know, think about our guests, you know, like to think about what is the vibe and yet, I felt the vibe from the heavens. Because I’m in I’m in a pajamas set. You know what I mean? I’m in my crisp PJs.
Kulap Vilaysack 01:24
That you bought.
SuChin Pak 01:25
Unwashed. That’s right.
Kulap Vilaysack 01:27
Well, you got through on the unwashed part.
SuChin Pak 01:29
Because they’re crisp.
Jon Gabrus 01:31
In honor of the guest He’s also unwash, thoroughly under wash these days.
SuChin Pak 01:40
Under washed very big distinction and we’ll get into it.
Kulap Vilaysack 01:46
Okay, so well sit back for a second with you’re not new, unwashed under watch for Asian PJs and I’m assuming Darn Tough Vermont woolen socks. There they are. There they are. Because our guest today is one half of 101 Places To Party Before You Die. He’s also known for Geico Comedy Bang Bang and TV lands younger he hosts the high and mighty and action voice podcast please Add to Cart the miraculous merman that is Jon Gabrus.
SuChin Pak 02:25
Yeah, you was he was shooting his guns you know you get this as an audio only medium. And yet I just had.
Jon Gabrus 02:32
I was just Su and Ku, I just wanted to share that. This is so rad. And also, Merman name is very flattering. I appreciate that. I’ve always considered myself a bit of a water dog. So calling me a merman is a kind of kind of a win. I like that.
Kulap Vilaysack 02:49
It’s sophisticated. You know we’re not like he’s not promoting 101 places to party before you die. We’re double striking but I can say that your swimming prowess is featured prominently on the show. Su this man he truly he belongs in water.
Jon Gabrus 03:08
Captain of the high school swim team 96 through 2000 Still got 25 years.
Kulap Vilaysack 03:14
Pardon me.
Jon Gabrus 03:16
Jones beach lifeguard through 2005 and now just overweight beach bum but still I get power from the mighty salty oceans. Yeah.
SuChin Pak 03:28
When you get in that water it’s it’s a different it’s a different vehicle.
Jon Gabrus 03:32
It’s a great equalizer gravity is different. As a matter of fact, I’m more buoyant in the water than most other people. And something that’s a limitation in my personal life is my lack of body hair. But get me in the water and I’m like Slippery like a seal so I’m adapted for the water like in a very specific way I think cold water based on my builds but.
Kulap Vilaysack 03:56
I dare you.
Jon Gabrus 03:57
I dare I.
Kulap Vilaysack 04:02
Jon, what’s your shopping style? How do you add to cart?
Jon Gabrus 04:07
Now? Okay, is this actual shopping or is this this sort of metaphorical adding to cart because that.
SuChin Pak 04:15
Way Wow. No one has made that distinction yet here on Add to Cart 300,000 episodes.
Jon Gabrus 04:24
Wow, you guys have this down pat at this point.
Kulap Vilaysack 04:28
No John, we don’t unfortunately we are still dizzy ass on you.
Jon Gabrus 04:33
For the listeners we are recording at noon Pacific so the pajama situation is interesting.
SuChin Pak 04:40
So I didn’t want to take over because because it’s not about me but I do. Yeah, I do want to ask you our esteemed guests like, do you guys have an opinion about pajamas out? You know out in the wild out dinner running errands. What do you think about pajamas as they It outerwear.
Jon Gabrus 05:01
I think it stops just below dinner. Like I think you can go run errands in pajamas, especially cute matching sets, like you’re saying here. And I’m assuming for most like fashion list bros like shorts and a T shirt or like soft shorts, athletic shorts and a T shirt or tank. That’s pajamas for a lot of us. And it’s funny because I don’t even sleep. Do you sleep in your pajamas? Or do you have like, do you pop those off for sleeping?
SuChin Pak 05:33
Yeah, that guy’s Yeah, these are popping off. Before I get to sleep. I have a different sleeping outfit.
Jon Gabrus 05:41
Do you change it to just a different pattern of pajamas or no? Okay.
SuChin Pak 05:45
No, no, no. It’s a whole different fabric. It’s different. Cotton way, I put more clothes on to go to bed than I’m out. But.
Jon Gabrus 05:55
That no, I’m sorry. It is so.
SuChin Pak 05:58
So strict. No, we we.
Kulap Vilaysack 06:00
Jonny need to understand, Jonny does not understand that. Su was peer pressured into buying this expensive pajama set while she was in Paris with her friend. Because her friend Annie is obsessed with pajamas.
SuChin Pak 06:12
Correct. Okay, and she looked at my sleeping outfit. And she said I can’t It’s so fucking depressing looking at you. I can’t even do it anymore. You need to wear something other than what you’re wearing which is some sort of like maybe it’ll be like a mock turtleneck in some sort of like a heat tech. I’m not gonna say it’s always unique low but some kind of like moisture wicking but yet.
Jon Gabrus 06:38
You sleep in performance sleeve.
SuChin Pak 06:41
Correct? Correct.
Jon Gabrus 06:42
Doing most of your performances.
SuChin Pak 06:47
Jon, you are getting to know me very, very well. When the sun sets is when my work really big. You know what I mean? I gotta wrestle the shit down for me to get to sleep. I’m not a sleeper and.
Jon Gabrus 07:05
Crazy sentence that.
SuChin Pak 07:07
I’m not sleeper, it’s tough. It’s tough. But yeah, so I like a lot of fabric. That’s not what I’m going to wear out while I’m you know, grocery shopping. And so I’ve got these pajamas sets. And I’ve been trying to convince everyone around me like hey, this is cool. This is interesting.
Kulap Vilaysack 07:28
Right? Because also Jon. She is an immigrant and she has purchased these expensive pajamas and in the cold light of Santa Barbara day she needs to get her money’s worth justify.
Jon Gabrus 07:46
Not an immigrant but I totally get this. It’s funny. I’m so sorry. I the wrapping my head around this. You wake up in the morning. Take off the pajamas. You slept in and put on other pajamas.
SuChin Pak 07:59
Correct.
Jon Gabrus 08:00
Okay. See that kind of. For me the idea of wearing your pajamas about is the idea of comfort and ease of like when I get up and like because I think I’m the opposite of you. I need to have, I can’t sleep with a wedding ring on. I can’t sleep with a necklace. I can’t sleep but I only just wear underwear out because of the fact that I have to get up in the middle of night sometimes to pee if I could sleep. I would be comfortable sleeping fully nude. I just also have a dog and sometimes like an errant claw will hit my belly and it’s better than hitting my bear picker if you will. So I’m protecting my I’m protecting myself from Arthur a little bit in the bed. But the pleasure of going out in your pajamas is not having to like change into them right like to me the laziness is the power but the coziness and cuteness is what you’re getting out of them because those look comfortable.
Kulap Vilaysack 08:53
Literally dabbing your eyes at you really just coming at you.
SuChin Pak 08:59
There is there is one thing on my body that is leftover from last night and that’s these darn tufts.
Jon Gabrus 09:07
Oh socks in bed stressed me out. It’s like wearing condoms like why? So my shopping style is.
Kulap Vilaysack 09:22
I want to hear actual shopping not meta shopping.
Jon Gabrus 09:25
Okay, cool. My actual shopping style is sort of because of my body. It’s specific in that it’s large, but large in a non traditional way. And so I have to make an a so I have one big arm that comes out of the middle of my chest like listeners are like what the fuck.
SuChin Pak 09:44
That’s it. I was like, I was like I’m not gonna ask follow ups but okay, I’m lots of images. Just like a.
Kulap Vilaysack 09:51
Child a child’s drawing of a man.
Jon Gabrus 09:53
I am, six foot to 310 pounds. I’m like a circle with a bearded head on top of it. I have no ass. I have big legs, big arms, broad shoulders, a huge belly B cups. So it’s like a cot and thick thighs and I’m a complicated size. So when I find clothes that work, I am loyal as fuck. Like if your company makes a double XL that I can wear comfortably and unbutton halfway and it doesn’t look insane on me. I will buy everything you have like, shout out, Ralph Lauren, shout out Roarke shout out. That’s Tommy Bahama. Most of my pants have to come from like retiree companies because I have like the frame of like a 65 year old ex CEO who’s into like boating and grilling. So all my clothes are like from a places that advertise shirts that have like big bottles of mirlo and shit on them.
Kulap Vilaysack 10:51
Smoking meats,
SuChin Pak 10:53
Not a bad lifestyle that you’re weaving there. You know what I mean? That’s a fairy tale we aspire to.
Jon Gabrus 10:59
I live a retired lifestyle. I just have never really worked either. So it’s like this complicated thing where, like, I love the beach. I love the outdoors. I love all that shit. I dream when I see like a big fat tan guy with a white beard. That is like I that’s aspirational to me, like the old man in the sea. Like I just want to have a nice gut from living and eaten well, a big white beard, super tan. Kinda like I could be fully bald at that point and be stoked, because I just want that’s the look I want. Every time I see a guy like that my wife leans over Tiffany, who’s, whose friend would lean over and go, you wish you or him, don’t you? Yes, that’s who I want to be when I grow up. I want to be like tropical Santa.
Kulap Vilaysack 11:44
That’s right.That’s right. That’s what I’m envisioning right now.
Jon Gabrus 11:49
So yeah, I’m loyal shopper like that. I do not like to go in person to stores I do not like to try on clothes. So I will buy the two sizes and do the return thing. And then when it comes to other stuff, I try to avoid online shopping for like Amazon makes me annoyed in a way that I it has a power over me that stresses me out. The idea of like shit, Arthur needs dog food. I could just like take my phone out and it’ll be there tomorrow. But there’s also like, I do have to go to CVS for this. Maybe while I’m out. I should just do dog food. And like, and then you don’t and then you feel bad. Like a few times I’ve Instacarted groceries is when I felt like one of the people from Wally where I’m like, I’m just a fucking pig. I should just be out there buying groceries like a person.
SuChin Pak 12:41
Yeah, we’re like walking isn’t even a thing anymore. You’re just on like, and while they’re on they’re on like like.
Kulap Vilaysack 12:48
Automated lazy boys. They’re
Jon Gabrus 12:50
Yeah, they’re on like a jazzy scooter meets a lazy boy chair. Yeah, that’s right. Yeah. And it’s um Wild Wild convenience the world we live in now especially like living in a major metropolitan area shit they’re like we can have this too at 5pm today and you want to be like no no, no, no, you can deliver my fish oil tomorrow. I do not need it right now. But there are a few things that I like get frequently on lines and I’m not really like oh do I want that like kind of person like I get what I need or really want in my head. Do a little bit of research shout out wire cutter for just about everything I need to do research on.
Kulap Vilaysack 13:30
I was just on that this morning getting some more smoke alarms but yes.
Jon Gabrus 13:36
More smoke alarms what got what anxieties are you going through over there? We don’t have a fucking we don’t have enough Scott.
Kulap Vilaysack 13:45
I’m slapping what on your ass.
Jon Gabrus 13:47
I just in case that ashes smoke it, keeps going off whenever Scott watches the mask. We need something better. Oh no, I actually bought smoking alarms.
SuChin Pak 14:04
That’s a whole new meaning. I like that concept though. And it’s a very interesting way of putting it like you lazy assholes.
Jon Gabrus 14:13
Yeah, every time my wife goes, Oh, I don’t even know what this is. When a package comes I get a little upset because I’m like, this is like, what’s wrong with capitalism? Like we’re a Dual Strike and you’re like buying things and you’re not positive what like if you can’t really remember what you bought, like that feels like a bad idea. And she because she has to buy stuff for work all the time to like make these like tables and so there’s constantly shit coming into our house and nothing ever going out. And when I say house, I do mean 1000 square foot apartment like.
Kulap Vilaysack 14:49
So you’ve met Tiffany and we’ve talked about Tiffany on the podcast, Lauren Lapkus brought her up. She is the power behind. I want to say the sweet through life that’s not right that’s correct yes. Oh yeah that’s me through life to see Flores would be to put it , indirectly, usual designer.
Jon Gabrus 15:10
Lifestyle Maven, I don’t even know what the fuck she is.
Kulap Vilaysack 15:13
I think that’s right. Yeah lifestyle Maven. I mean tablescape artists like maximalist.
Jon Gabrus 15:20
Yes a maximalist we are fucking wall to wall in this house with what I consider stuff what she considers a building the aesthetic or whatever, you know. Oh, all my stuff is in one room in my office and your shit is everywhere she’s like, well my shit looks cute and I’m like, okay, Winner.
Kulap Vilaysack 15:41
Winner winner chicken dinner. Well also Gabrus you are preparing for a lifestyle that’s coming on a slow boat, and only you know what once a month as a boat come from the mainland, right?
Jon Gabrus 15:54
I gotta get used to it. I’m like, oh shit, we’re almost out of jarred pineapples or whatever. You know, like, I used to have this joke with my old riding partner. He’s like, we would make the joke that like, hopefully someday, he like rides out to my hut to deliver residuals check or whatever. Like, I want so badly. Like, Hey, isn’t that isn’t that Jon Gabrus? Like? Yeah, he’s been living fucking off the grid. Like, I want to have no shoes on for like, for like four. I want to be like, Oh, shit, we have to go somewhere that requires shoes. And then me spend time looking for them looking. Yeah, I want to live in a world where I’m like, fuck, where did I leave my shoes? It’s been a couple of days now.
SuChin Pak 16:29
Yeah. Yeah, that’s, I’m right there with you. So are you not the type of person Ku and I maybe are the type of people. Yes, we are. Where we’re scrolling through Instagram. And there’s just an ad. And it follows you just right before we sat down to record, I was like, fuck it. I’m doing it. I’m getting magic molecule. I don’t know what it is. But I feel like I’ve seen it enough. And so I did it. I ordered two bottles. So is that not something you ever do? Like, do you ever just get swayed? Because I feel like you’re a man who’s like, Nope, this is what I need. I’m not really thinking about anything else.
Jon Gabrus 17:07
I’m weirdly frugal and disgustingly bad with money at the same time. Like, I’ll be like, I don’t need that. I don’t need that. And then like, I’ll be like out to dinner. And it’ll be like, oh, yeah, let’s get another bottle of this like, and it’ll be like a $700 dinner. And I’ll be like, Oh my God, I don’t have this money, but I just spent that, but I’ll be at home. I’ll be like $6 for delivery. I’ll just not get it, you know, and like, and I’m like, I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me. But I have very strong power over Instagram purchases. Instagram has a stranglehold on my fucking psyche. But I’ve been burned a couple of times by really misrepresented like stuff in ads, like the clothes, the shirts I ever get served. But what I will use Instagram ads to get me to do a little hunting, because they know my brain so well. They’ll start posting something. I’ll be like, What is this rumble blanket I keep getting? And then I’ll go and do a little research on rumble blanket. Find out it’s not garbage. And then I’ll eventually be like, this is something I’m looking for and get it because they know you.
SuChin Pak 18:14
Rumbled blankets.
Kulap Vilaysack 18:16
Are you PL.
Jon Gabrus 18:18
Yes.
SuChin Pak 18:18
What is? Yeah, I don’t know what this is. This is not in my algorithm.
Jon Gabrus 18:23
Oh, see, my algorithm is sizzling. It’s like it knows me so well. It’s very outdoorsy, beachy and like retro surf clothing like it’s got me that figured out. And then my for you page is just busty women doing activities. I like like it’s really really got me sorted like it’s just like oh gave her some scuba diving. Yeah. Oh, you got two of my favorite things at once. Like.
SuChin Pak 18:48
I feel like that’s a very large net though. I’m not I’m not saying that that’s you don’t have refined tastes? Oh no, I’m just saying.
Jon Gabrus 18:56
I think I think people understand the heterosexual male brain to a degree where any one of my friends who any one of my male straight friends who may have like liked a models Instagram at some point, but the computer now knows you like boobs or women in general. And they like oh, you also watch guitar tutorials. Now you have busty guitar tutorials. Like there are influencers who are beautiful of all genders who are doing every single activity. Like the amount of right the amount of hikers and backpackers that I don’t follow that show up on my for you page that were white tank tops with no bras to go hiking like no you want sweat what you want su pajamas at that moment. You don’t want fucking just a loose.
SuChin Pak 19:43
Nobody wants Yeah, yeah.
Kulap Vilaysack 19:46
I mean, let’s hit a sweat. I mean, you know no performance were there. You know?
SuChin Pak 19:51
My equivalent to that is like super hot guys doing pottery. That’s super hot guys. Who are private chefs.
Kulap Vilaysack 19:59
Yep, yep.
Jon Gabrus 20:01
Like a shirtless guy chopping onions and you’re like this makes no fucking sense.
SuChin Pak 20:05
Yes, I hate onions. Yeah, right but this I’m gonna watch it till the end and then when it says rewatch I say again from the top. Let’s play it again.
Jon Gabrus 20:16
I feel like there’s some dark force some like internet producer who’s like, Okay, people are watching videos about dreidel spinning. It’s like Alright, let’s get a few busty women spinning Doritos. It’s got a few shirtless rip guys spinning Trados. Let’s get a couple of non binary cutie spin and Trados. Let’s get it all out there. And let’s just cast this net to get people to look at our dreidel content. And it’s like, that’s primal. That’s just like, Oh, you like this? Well, what about this with a dash of sex in the background? And you’re like, well, weirdly enough, I like it even more.
SuChin Pak 20:47
It’s so strange.
Kulap Vilaysack 20:48
Yeah, our lizard brains are like Nom nom nom.
Jon Gabrus 20:58
Just to jump back to rumpled blankets. They’re these giant, wildly patterned blankets. That smushed down really small. So like they are like outdoorsy or like the trunk of your car. Or like, you know.
SuChin Pak 21:13
But then they’re warm. Like they’re gonna actually keep you warm. It’s not.
Jon Gabrus 21:17
Yeah, it’s not like a microfiber but it’s not like super warm, but it is like a down ish material.
SuChin Pak 21:24
Ah, yeah. Okay, so you can just just at any moment in time you’re on your 50 mile hike in the you know, Colorado mountains. And you just want to snuggle up.
Jon Gabrus 21:36
Yeah, you just.
SuChin Pak 21:37
I need to snuggle I’m, I just need it. Yeah. And you bust out a rumble blanket and you just snuggle up under.
Jon Gabrus 21:44
I for sure. I brought one I did a relay race that had like a sleepover element to it like a tent camping sleepover. Camping. It was it was a 36 hour race or whatever. So it was pretty fucking rad.
Kulap Vilaysack 21:58
Holy shit Gabrus, for real?
Jon Gabrus 22:00
Yeah, it’s called the hood to coast you run from Mountain hood all the way to the coast of Oregon. It’s 200 miles. We did it with like, a 10 person team. Yeah. So I only ran a total of like 14 or 15 miles, three legs. Other people did like in the 20s. But like you split it split the legs up amongst your team. I brought my rumble blanket because I needed something that can squeeze down small and then when I did want to sleep or did get chilly. I’ve whipped out my little whipped out my little rumbles terrifying. whipped up my little rumpled foreskin and
SuChin Pak 22:41
Exalted and brought down accompany in one sentence shall not exist after this. They’re like we really didn’t need that from you guys.
Jon Gabrus 22:53
Now they seem to be doing wildly popular. They seems like everyone, a lot of people have rumble. I bet you I’ve said it enough. Now. It’ll be on your end. You’ve said it out loud enough. It’ll show up on your Instagram. And you’ll be like, What are these cute brightly colored blankets? I could use one of these. It’s like one of those things that like it takes up so little space and you’re like, you can easily talk yourself into having a blanket. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, go Yeah, an extra blanket can’t hurt. It’s in my camping kit. Like with my mattress pad, my sleeping bag. There’s also an extra rumble in case it’s freezing. Or I want to lay down another layer of padding or something like that. I got two boxes from The Container Store two containers, and I made them into my camping containers because I don’t have garage any space anywhere because it’s.
Kulap Vilaysack 23:37
Aside from the room that you’re in right now because Tiffany has the rest.
Jon Gabrus 23:41
Yeah, and as a matter of fact, even our little parking lot storage unit is full of like skull votives for Halloween arrangements or whatever. Like all this shit like she just has every space taken. So I’m so proud of myself. I feel like such an old man I have now like my hobby containers where I could just put those in my car and I’m ready to go camping because I’m going camping this week. I’m going Thursday night so slide out my little boxes and I’m ready to rip.
Kulap Vilaysack 24:08
Let’s get into your cart because your today are very much like we’re not talking about just things I’m sure we’ll touch on them. Like we did the rebel blankets but let’s talk about how you’ve added to cart backpacking and hiking.
Jon Gabrus 24:20
Yes, in the metaphorical if I added this to my cart, I’m hoping to check out with it but we’ll see is right before the pandemic I went camping for the first time I’m from Long Island and I have a dad who worked nights and weekends so I never went camping growing up. And it never appealed to me as like a indoor city kid and shit and then moving to Southern California where you have like beautiful nature in like 90 minutes in any direction. I saw some of my friends were into it. I’m into hallucinogens. So like they paired well and I was like, Oh, I went camping a few times and I started borrowing friends tents borrowing. Oh yeah, borrow a sleeping bag. A free Under mindset, what you should do is buy one thing every time you go camping, buy like one Knuth and I was and that I was like, Oh, I like that game. It’s easy to just fill your cart and go like now I’m a camper, but there’s a little bit of something like you don’t know. So now I’m like, the next time I went, I bought a tent. Next time I went, I bought a mattress pad. The next time I went, I bought a headlamp, I’ve now got like two boxes full of stuff. I’m really enjoying being more outdoorsy. I’ve camped a few times by myself recently. Yeah, solo, but solo at campsite. So it’s not truly like scary solo. It’s like, Yeah, but I’ve like set up my tents by myself. And this is all minor to most people who are outdoorsy, but to me, this is all very started my own fire cooked my own corn over the fire. I enjoy all this stuff. And I live in LA and I’m 40. So I of course I go on hikes with friends, which I guess is something you’re supposed to do seems like for the last 10 years, but now I’ve gotten more and more into hiking as like a thing that isn’t a route to adventure. And I’m like, just getting kind of close into getting into backpacking, which is like a combination of hiking and camping.
Kulap Vilaysack 26:11
I mean, Gabriel, this is the next travel show. I mean, I am bursting this is the next Gabrus pally travel show.
Jon Gabrus 26:19
Let’s go please.
Kulap Vilaysack 26:21
What the fuck I mean, can we add the right please?
Jon Gabrus 26:25
I mean, I would I would like nothing more than to monetize another hobby of mine. I’ve never gotten rich yet, but I’ve gotten to do kind of like whatever I wanted for a long time, which is I said yet like it’s, it’s happening soon. Trust me. There’s a couple more things need to fall in place a couple of trifectas need to hit at the track and I’m fucking flossing. So that’s something new and I want to do more of that. I got a new car a few months ago, my lease was up and I am now leasing a Subaru Outback wilderness edition to continue my.
Kulap Vilaysack 26:56
This this a new chapter this is. I’m just like, totally transforming. Yeah, okay, like I love it.
Jon Gabrus 27:07
I’ve been referring to it as my outdoorsy forthies. Because I got really into it at like 39. And now I’m 41 Turning 42 And I’m like, fuck this is going to be it’s a combines a lot of stuff I like, let me back you up a little bit. Someone one time said Are you like into nature? And I’m like, No, I’m not really an outdoorsy guy. And then they were like, Darn you one of the few people in Los Angeles who goes to the beach like every week all year long. I’m like, yeah, and they’re like, you know, the beach is outdoors. And I was like, I had cuz I grew up on an island like the beach was just like a Long Island of sorts. You I said like on an island like I’m from South Pacific or something. Yeah. Everyone knows. I’m American Samoan. And no, I so i The beach was never consulted. It was just a thing. And because people like brought boogie boards and Coronas there. It never felt like the outdoors to me. But when someone mentioned that I was like, Oh, I do like the beach. Like well, then you like nature like I’m like, oh, and so then I like started doing more and more camping and hiking and seeking out cool new outdoorsy spots. And I’m like, wait, fuck I do like this. And now I’m getting more and more into it. So and I like weed. I like hallucinogens, I like cooking simple meals. I like having my shirt off. I like being in nature. I like quiet. And so there’s a lot of these things all come together in these moments and like I dislike my phone and your phone kind of gets braked when you go to a lot of campsite.
Kulap Vilaysack 28:40
Buddy buddy I have a pitch for your TV show the title. No Shoes No Shirt No Service.
Jon Gabrus 28:47
Ah ah buddy buddy that’s so awesome and service meaning something else I fucking love it. Fucking love it.
SuChin Pak 29:01
You guys don’t work too hard word Double Strike. This would be like pen This is what do we call him this just a phone call? What is this like a friendly chat.
Jon Gabrus 29:11
An unscripted shows not covered by any unions. Not that I’m dying for a loophole here but but so all that stuff being combined and now I’m like, oh shit, this matters to me. This is something that’s and then like, now with just a little bit of the gear. The game has like changed for me a little bit.
SuChin Pak 29:31
Rumpelstiltskin?
Jon Gabrus 29:32
I got my rumpled foreskin ready to rip? Yeah, I got a lantern that cranks up. You know I got a solar charger. I got extra battery packs. I got all this fun shit. And then in Los Angeles, and I’m assuming along other parts of the West Coast and East Coast, ostensibly. You can camp on the beach, thereby combining two major facets of my personality. Yeah, now I’m whole now I’m waking up in the morning and taking my morning piss in the ocean rather than in the communal camp bathroom. That’s a fucking win win situation me.
Kulap Vilaysack 30:08
Some King Triton shit right there to piss in the ocean.
SuChin Pak 30:12
Just roar I hope you’re roaring when you’re doing it. I imagine
Jon Gabrus 30:16
I’m not in the ocean. I’m standing an ankle deep water pissing.
SuChin Pak 30:20
Warren you got no no panties on, you know, because you’re sleeping.
Jon Gabrus 30:26
I’m not sleeping. I don’t have six pajama sets. Well, there’s another thing about camping and all that, that attracts me. It’s like the stripping down of other stuff. If I don’t need this, I don’t want to bring it. So there’s like this out like with Clark camping, which is mostly what I’m doing. You can have a bunch of extra shit in your car in case shit hits the fan. Like, you know, you can have another cooler full of snacks. You can have extra sweatshirts and stuff like that. But there’s something appealing about like trying to bring less like and in backpacking. Yeah. And this is definitely a whether it’s conscious or subconscious and reaction to living in a maximalist household. There is just people coming in and out music blasting loud talking and stuff everywhere, which I love. But I do think my camping alone.
SuChin Pak 30:34
100% yes.
Jon Gabrus 30:44
It’s like there’s some things to swing the pendulum in the other way. Yeah.
Kulap Vilaysack 31:19
And also the pandemic. I mean, you know, we’re still pretty much inside it but I’m sure wanting to be out doors and not in you know, these familiar four walls. It makes a lot of sense for this change.
Jon Gabrus 31:34
Yeah. And also, you live in a tiny apartment. I don’t see a future where you’re buying a house anywhere near where you currently live. Unless something a lot of things change. It’s like fuck it I’ll take advantage of my location and get to go to all these fucking radical places. You see people like oh, yeah, look at this. Kern River you’re like what the fuck is that? You’re like it’s a river in California that has gorgeous camping alongside of it you’re like fuck I never knew about this and it’s like.
Kulap Vilaysack 32:03
Gabrus, I hear you can lazy river there you here you can get a inner tube.
Jon Gabrus 32:08
That’s something I’ve never done that’s on my bucket list baby like that. Tube , like tube life. That shit is on my bucket list. I’ve never gotten a chance to do that.
Kulap Vilaysack 32:17
My heart is both broken but about to be filled because of anyone I know. Who should be living a tubing lifestyle.
SuChin Pak 32:25
Hashtag tube life.
Kulap Vilaysack 32:27
It’s Gabrus.
Jon Gabrus 32:28
Thank you.
SuChin Pak 32:29
I think we’re headed there i think i think that’s on your Horizon.
Kulap Vilaysack 32:34
Especially since he’s removing from cart hard pants.
Jon Gabrus 32:38
Yes. Okay, let’s talk about that.
SuChin Pak 32:41
What is a hard to paint?
Kulap Vilaysack 32:42
A hard Jean.
Jon Gabrus 32:44
A Jean or anything with buttons and belt loops. They are gone. I stopped wearing them in the pandemic because I had no I only wore jeans for like auditions shows and dinners. And so then those stopped. I’m just in shorts the whole time. And then I get some sweatpants for when it gets colder. Or joggers or something and then I realize they make these pants with elastic waist that are joggers that are like going out joggers that are khaki colored joggers or black joggers. And now I’m like, fuck, dude, I’m never going back to hard pants. And so like I’ve been rocking shorts and soft pants. And you know.
Kulap Vilaysack 33:23
We’re not looking back.
Jon Gabrus 33:24
I haven’t worn a belt, like three or four years except for the creative arts. Emmys. I had to wear a belt with like the suit I was wearing.
Kulap Vilaysack 33:32
I was gonna say, What about a wedding? You gotta wear a suit? Are you going to kind of do a mix and match?
Jon Gabrus 33:39
I’ve been kind of a real tacky wedding guests these last few times. It’s like, oh, you’re getting married in Cape Cod. Great. I have seersucker shorts and a seersucker jacket I could slap together. Like I’ve been doing way too much like this is technically dress clothes. Like you know and I think people are getting a little frustrated by that. Topo designs this company that makes like, they make these pants that are a little stretchy, solid colored but they like tie at the ankle and tie at the waist. I fucking love them.
SuChin Pak 34:12
Is this the Is this the bag company?
Jon Gabrus 34:14
Yes, they also make bags.
SuChin Pak 34:18
I had no idea they made clothes. And so these are the pathway or the pants or the shorts because I’m on the website out because my next question was going to be what have been some of the wins because I know once you like a brand you’re all in.
Jon Gabrus 34:33
Yeah, they have a pair of pants called the dirt pants. And they come in a bunch of different colors. And they they’re double XL. When I wear them. They look painted on they are a little they’re double XL is a little tight on me. But not unflatteringly tight just like hip tight like stylishly tight. Yeah, and if you tuck that tie in, you can rock the black ones with a suit and no one knows and I’ve been doing that. And then like If you’re wearing a sockless shoe you can like tie the ankle a little bit to show a little flash a little Puritan ankle for all your Amish homes. A little ankle cleave Okay, so that’s been a big win and then also like this company, Rourk, R O A R K they make like a bunch of different kinds of apparel. And they make joggers that are stylish that like I have like, here I can show you because everything I own is within as you can see arm’s reach acid washed denim joggers I mean come on now come on now look at this look good. waist pants, elastic cuffs. And then they just look like jeans on They look kinda like weird jeans on it fucking rolls.
Kulap Vilaysack 35:43
Oh damn, this is like Okay, I just love things Jon. I just love things and I love while talking about like, you embracing this new that lifestyle. We’re still we’re still getting tips. We’re still getting things.
SuChin Pak 35:59
And we’re still stylish. We’re still stylish. There’s nothing here from the from the blankets to the soft pants. You know all of its all of its stylish.
Jon Gabrus 36:11
I have a very specific lane but I do have some taste and I have been married to like the queen of esthetics for 20 years. So like I have been like training Yeah, yeah.
SuChin Pak 36:28
Just sidenote men’s ankles aren’t appreciated enough
Kulap Vilaysack 36:32
Oh wow. So thank you speak on this more please.
SuChin Pak 36:35
As you said that show a little ankle there is something about a man’s ankle you don’t see it often so it’s it’s there’s a mystique.
Jon Gabrus 36:45
Especially in like in like dress up world like having like a sockless shoe and like when you’re. You see it on like, like a sexy like, fucking like rich guy will like cross his legs and you’ll see like a little bit of ankle and you’ll be like, damn, okay, that’s this guy’s got it figured out. This guy knows what he’s doing here. A little Sharon Stone with the ankle. Yeah. Just a visible bush on his ankle.
SuChin Pak 37:10
Okay, all right. That’s a different, that’s a different flavor.
Kulap Vilaysack 37:18
We don’t kink shame here.
Jon Gabrus 37:29
I don’t think I’ll ever go back to hard pants except for like, if a professional wardrobe person is telling me I have to wear it on at work. You know? Like, like, if they’re picking it out for me and putting it out? Yeah,
Kulap Vilaysack 37:39
If Gucci is reaching out and saying like, Hey, we’re gonna dress you. Sorry. It’s gotta be hard pants. You’re gonna be okay with that.
Jon Gabrus 37:48
Yes, exactly.
SuChin Pak 37:50
Anything under that bar? softy, comfy.
Kulap Vilaysack 37:55
please. Oh, sorry.
Jon Gabrus 37:57
I just realized that I was dressing up for a dressing up in quotes for me is wearing pants, I guess. But I was dressing up for other people. I was dressing up for what I thought you had to wear on stage or what you had to wear at dinner. And I’m like, when I’m dressed as what I feel comfortable in. I’m more comfortable that shines through. Like I’ve been using this analogy a lot, but I’ll hit you guys with it. A lot of people don’t love the way they look in a bathing suit. And if we’re talking man, a lot of guys are like, Oh, I feel weird in a bathing suit. I’ve was a speedo guy when I was a lifeguard and swim team guy became a board shorts guy in my 20s 30s. But in my 40s I was like, I really liked wearing Speedos, and it’s not flattering on me. But if I believe a speedo is not flattering on me. Neither is like shorts that are three inches longer. So I started to go like, if I look 5% Worse than the speedo, but I feel 15% Better or I feel like I look better than the math is there that I should be fucking rockin Speedos. So now I’m a full time Speedo guy like I wear.
Kulap Vilaysack 39:03
A fucking glorious, it’s so fucking glorious. John’s over at the house. He’s in his Oakleys you know, like, I’m just waiting for the Hawaiian shirts and come off and then get you know, we get the full Speedo effect. And it’s amazing.
Jon Gabrus 39:17
I went to a friend’s pool party that I haven’t been to in a long time. And I’m like, Just a heads up. Jeff, I rock speedos now. And he’s like, okay, and like he and his wife. The people hosted the party were the only two people I knew at the party. Tiffany wasn’t even there. So I was like super brave. I’m like, hey to the other 16 people hanging out by the pool. I’m a 40 year old 300 pound dude who’s gonna have a purple leopard print Speedo or budgy? Well while we’re talking products Budgy Smuggler Australia.
SuChin Pak 39:48
Budgy Smugglers spell that.
Jon Gabrus 39:50
B U D G Y.
Kulap Vilaysack 39:52
A budgy is a type of Australian bird, is it not?
Jon Gabrus 39:54
Yes and being a budgy smuggler means you’re smuggling a bird and if you will. Yeah, it’s B U D G Y. Smuggler and it’s on.
SuChin Pak 40:05
Again within arm’s reach. It’s all within arm’s reach. It’s on the printed side. It’s a hot pink. He’s holding up a hot pink Speedo covered in blue sharks. And it says a budgy smuggler, in big beautiful font on his ass.
Kulap Vilaysack 40:21
Yellow, bright yellow.
Jon Gabrus 40:22
They all they all say budgy smuggler, on the ass. That’s like the thing they have in common.
Kulap Vilaysack 40:26
Avocado. I’m looking at an avocado Print Right Now what else you got Gabrus, You got another?
Jon Gabrus 40:32
Course I have another. This one I bought specifically for my brother. When I went home for vacay I bought it for myself to wear because he’s a big fan of sushi.
Kulap Vilaysack 40:46
Budgy Smuggler.
SuChin Pak 40:48
I love this. Now I want to ask Jon because I feel like for a lot of people who turn that 40 corner. This is delightful and not news. I feel like there was something that happened when I turned 40 When I turned inward, I was like, I the gaze is no longer outward. Also your gaze, I could give a fuck. This is all about me. Like what makes me feel good? What makes me happy? And I’m sensing that theme. So I’m just curious. Does the age factor the wisdom have to do with some of these choices?
Jon Gabrus 41:25
Objectively you are 100% Right? There is something you become a little more confident in who you are. And I’m scared because I you know the old like even older people who are like, barely part of society where you’re like, the 60 year old guy with like piss stains on his sweatpants and like a bluetooth earpiece. And he’s having like a loud conversation while you’re in line at the coffee shop. And you’re like, well, there isn’t you’re supposed to still be in public together. But there isn’t a line. There’s a line. There’s a line. Yeah, but there’s a part of you on my line. But yeah. And there’s a part of you where you’re more confident in who you are. You give a shit less what other people say about you. You realize who your real circle is and who you care. Like who you don’t want to offend. And so you like lean into and then there’s also an element of nostalgia, I think for 40 somethings in it to where we’re, we’re throwing back to stuff that we liked when we were kids. Or like there’s something that feel, baby, stop the slow march of death. Whatever we’re doing, we’re looking backwards and inwards. And we’re like, I was at my happiest when I was a beach lifeguard and asleep, you know, and I’m like, Okay, how can I like really bring that back? And then like, now, when someone compliments me on my tan, which is I have minimal tan lines these days. Like, that’s something I pride myself on. You know what I mean? Like, that feels that feels good. And it is this inward gaze and this, and this experience of like, oh, I wore that because that’s what I thought you had to wear, but now when I wear this, no one cares. And maybe it is like, speaking of other people’s gaze, maybe it is that like what people call the NPC mentality when you’re like in your 40s. And like, you’re just once you get your 40s you’re not really part of like cool society. Like it just happens around you. LA is a different story, because you could be like a dad at 70 new dad 71 here. So it’s like it’s a little it’s a little different.
Kulap Vilaysack 43:15
Yeah, Al Pacino, new dad.
Jon Gabrus 43:18
Age age and new dad then divorces the woman. It’s like, she’s like, Are you fucking kidding me? I like took fucking 80 year old loads and then you’re gonna we’re gonna get divorce.
SuChin Pak 43:28
Yeah, welcome to LA Hollywood baby.
Jon Gabrus 43:30
Exactly. It’s like that. And so there’s a little bit of like, well, no one’s really paying attention me. And then I’m also in this position where I’m like, why not just be who I am. And then you get reinforced lately, where people are like, I love your style. Or like, I love that you’re always in a fucking Speedo. And you’re like, Yeah, I mean, I don’t know if you’re telling the truth or not, but it fucking feels good to you. No one was like, Hey, cool board shorts.
Kulap Vilaysack 43:52
For the record. I love your style. I love that you’re in a Speedo like that wholeheartedly, wholeheartedly.
SuChin Pak 44:00
I appreciate you know what it does, it gives everyone else permission to just have a good time, be who you are, and give less fucks like, I believe that you are that person at the party where I’m like, Thank God, I hope he’s getting a check at the end of this. Like because we are all benefiting from this person being here. I don’t know half the people here. I’m wearing hard pants. I’m not happy.
Jon Gabrus 44:28
I’m not comfortable. Yeah, so I’m hoping when people like you’re saying people don’t look at me and go like, I want to be just like that. But I hope people look at me and go like, Well, if he could do that, then I can wear the stupid hat I Love You know what I mean? Or like I could bring back ballet flats. 2023.
Kulap Vilaysack 44:44
I could wear these expensive pajamas. Oh during the day.
Jon Gabrus 44:49
These are my going out pajamas.
SuChin Pak 44:53
The thing is, is I don’t want to turn this towards the coffin but you mentioned it and I love coffin talk. Is that As you marched towards death, like I also really appreciate any moment, any small sliver of a moment where I’m laughing, you know, and it’s, it can be a chuckle, it can be like something that I love to just, you know, bust out of my room in the morning and just show my family what it is I’m going to be wearing all day, and they all laugh and it makes me laugh, and I’m okay with that. And in fact, I love it. You know, so there’s also that I think there’s something about getting older where you’re like, you just, you just so cherish those moments that you’re genuinely like happy in the smallest little thing.
Jon Gabrus 45:42
There’s something magnanimous about that, too, because it’s like the world arguably kind of sucks. So if you could bring a smile to like three people’s face, because you’re wearing goofy pajamas at the Gelson That’s a fucking win. Like, you know what I mean? Like three more people smile than that weren’t going to smile necessarily. So you bring that energy to them. And that feels fucking good.
Kulap Vilaysack 46:03
Jon, thank you so much for joining us. You can find him on Instagram and Twitter at Gabrus , G A B R U S and you can find everything we talked about today on our Instagram at Add to Cart pod.
SuChin Pak 46:16
Yey, thank you.
Jon Gabrus 46:18
This was a blast guys thank you so much.
CREDITS 46:25
There’s more add to cart with Lemonada Premium subscribers get exclusive access to bonus content like where we give you an unfiltered look at the actual last thing we bought subscribe now in Apple podcasts. There’s more ADD TO CART with Lemonada Premium. Subscribers get exclusive access to bonus content like where we tell you about the last item we bought or returned and why. Subscribe now in Apple podcasts. Add To Cart is a production of Lemonada Media. Our producers are Kegan Zema and Tiffany Bouy. Brian Castillo is our engineer. Theme music is by Wasahhbii and produced by La Made It and Oh So Familiar with additional music by APM music. Executive producers or Kulap Vilaysack, SuChin Pak, Jessica Cordova Kramer, and Stephanie Wittels Wachs. Be sure to check out all the items we mentioned today on our Instagram at @AddToCartPod. Follow Add to Cart wherever you get your podcasts or listen at free on Amazon music with your Prime membership.