Love After Lockdown

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Michael and Pele have been taking this time in isolation for some meaningful heart-to-hearts. Today they discuss the collective trauma of going through a global pandemic, and how we can each come out of this with more love for ourselves, for our families, and for each other. Mostly suitable for work, but it gets deep.


[00:30] Michael Bennett: Hello, people who are tuning into Mouthpeace this week. This week, we have an interesting subject. We’re wondering how will America deal with coming back into society? Everybody’s been in their own cocoons for two months and we’ve seen what we thought was essential, what was important to us, the value of different things have went up and went down. And now I feel personally that people are going to have a hard time going back into the workplace, going back into different areas, because also the climate of the safety where we was regular safety is not going to seem safe to us anymore. We talk about the NFL games, talk about going to the movies. Movies is an American pastime, going to the movies and having a great time. 


[01:15] Pele Bennett: No, movies is Michael’s pastime. And that’s something you love to do.


[01:19] Michael Bennett: I mostly watch my movies at my own home. But it’s going to be different. It’s going to be different. I actually I’m worried because in my class the other day, we were talking and a lot of students were saying they’re like they all had these different things that will build these barriers up that they didn’t have to deal with certain traumas. Right. One student, she was saying that education was the blocking of a nerve, you know, that makes her arm numb and makes her not have to deal with the issues that she was dealing with in her family. And when that was taken out, like when the things that we see as valuable are taken out and we have to face our issues and face ourselves, when we come on the other side, who knows what we’re going to look like. Do you think that society is going to look different? Do you think it’s going to stay the same? Or do you feel like people are going to have to deal with a lot more traumas or a lot more disorders? How do you see it?


[02:09] Pele Bennett: No, I think that what she’s saying, it also makes you reflect on other people, and who they are to you, and what roles they play in your life. And I think all of that is a full circle. So you have to really create your bubble again. It’s like, wait, what am I doing? What am I doing, like, literally in life. What am I doing with my family? What am I doing with my job, career? What do I want to do as I continue to move forward, especially for this young person’s career? 


[02:34] Michael Bennett: I also think, too, because like everybody has their own social value, too, like we were talking about how people have this social value on the Internet. They have the social value at work to have their space. And when they are in a place they feel so valuable when they’re taken out their place, they’re not as have the most self-love as they thought they did. I think a lot people are dealing with the issue of not having as much love for themselves as they thought they did.


[02:55] Pele Bennett: I think it’s more love for yourself because when you’re talking about social, you know, having attention socially, then I think it goes kind of hand-in-hand because it gives you a creative space to be social. But because people are able to maybe like something on social or give a comment of judgment, you know, you have a lot of people commenting and judging you, and then you turn around and it’s like, what about yourself? What did you say the other day? You said one of your students said something about them being alone. 


[03:22] Michael Bennett: Yeah. She said something that was so profound but so simple. She was like, if you don’t like being alone, look in a mirror and check why you don’t like being alone with that person. And she’s really talking about why don’t you like looking at yourself? Why don’t we like being alone? And I think being at home now in these cocoons, we have an opportunity to really hibernate and really dig deep into our self-awareness, and really figure out why haven’t we been loving ourselves. It’s like everybody’s been dressing themselves up to these different reasons. And like you said, you know, clothes is not a value anymore because we’re not going anywhere. Your car doesn’t matter because you can’t drive. And it’s like you have to really deal with yourself. And I think if we’re taken out of our social spaces, we realize that the value of the things that we have placed in front of dealing with our past has really just been a barrier this whole time.


[04:09] Pele Bennett: Something you said that your student said, oh, do I like myself enough to be alone with myself? And I was thinking about that because I’m like, well, yeah, you know, you can be alone. But then I was like, I guess that’s true to an extent, because a lot of people like the energy of people. So you do like to be around people, but to have to isolate yourself and be — like a lot of people don’t have family or friends, they are staying home alone like that is a lot to deal with literally in your own mind. And only your thoughts are coming along. You don’t have that outside space. So I’m pretty sure that’s probably why social media is going crazy. I’ve even gone on a lot more than I usually do just because of the extra time. 


[04:50] Michael Bennett: You could be spending that extra time with me.


[04:53] Pele Bennett: No, because Michael decided to get an X box, not one, but two, and he decided to play 2k Madden, I don’t even know the titles of these games. So that’s where Michael’s extra time is going, into video games. 


[05:12] Michael Bennett: You know it’s not true. 


[05:13] Pele Bennett: But that’s OK, because that’s what you like to do in your own time. 


[05:18] It comes down to like — I was telling Pele the other day — Martin Luther King was talking about it. I was reading and I was told about the different types of love that the Greeks believed in. The Greeks were supposedly sophisticated. But I feel like with social media, it’s like the love this call eros. Eros is erotic love. The love is connection to sexual passion and is seen as strong in physical or emotional attraction. The whole world, when it comes to social media, we are so in love with the physical way of people, how people look, what they’re doing, attracted to it. And we get so emotionally attached to it that we start to base our desires on that beauty. And this is what it’s talking about, that you start to love something new, and you start to base your desires, and your focus is on the individual specification of the manifesting an emotional involvement only based on certain factors and characteristics of the individual of that love. And the characteristics or factors disappear, the love would be broken. The love only wants to receive what the others can’t supply. That’s kind of where we are right now, because we really haven’t had a chance to love ourselves, really. 


[06:35] Michael Bennett: And I guess because we’re living in a world where everything is pictures and everything is instant and it’s like people do fall in love with the way that things look. People who fall in love with people on the internet that they don’t even know, or they just go crazy and cheat on their spouses, and it’s all because of something that they’ve seen. And it’s become this individual desire to have that. And I feel like we all become so, we desire so much what other people are doing, other people having that we don’t desire ourselves no more because other people’s individual characteristics seem more valuable to us. 


[07:11] Michael Bennett: Every day you wake up and every day your mind is infiltrated with other people’s thoughts. As soon as you wake up, you look at CNN, you look at Instagram, and before you can form any thought, somebody else already formed a thought for you. 


[07:27] Pele Bennett: So I actually have all of those online photos. It’s like a daily thing, I think, because we’re so stuck in our bubbles. It’s like to figure out what’s going on, you do almost have to read every source of news. You have to talk to friends and family because the news, the way it’s circulating, it keeps changing constantly daily. So I don’t know what the hell is going on. It keeps changing. So I do watch the news, but I think what you’re saying is that I feel like I’m an old lady or we’re an old couple because in the morning I do read my news first and then I’m like, Michael, so this is what I read here. This is what I read here. And then we start talking about it. But I could see how that could definitely, you know, put thoughts into your head on that whatever the news is, it’s gold. Because that’s why I think it’s important to read, you know, different sources of news and however you get your information so that you can — if it’s not factual, you can come up with your own opinion and thoughts, but also having conversation with someone like me and you’re talking about, I think is important because if you’re by yourself and you’re just, you know, thinking about — you don’t have someone saying, no, that can’t be true. Or did you read something else or I saw that on something else. I think it’s important to have that dialog with friends, family. So that way you’re not going crazy. You know, you can kind of stay sane, but have that information going back and forth because not all of it is true. And some of it needs to be talked out. 


[08:45] Michael Bennett: But that’s what I’m saying. I’m saying that most of people fall in love with something that they don’t even know if what they’re perceiving is really factual. Whether it’s the way that somebody looks, the way that their house — people don’t really know about that. And like so we’ve built so many ways to not be happy with ourselves. Like, if I had what Kim Kardashain had, I’d be happier. If I had what Bill Gates had, I’d be happier. And now we’re home and realizing that it doesn’t really matter what they have because they’re dealing with their own thing. And even though we can look at stuff and form our opinions right off the bat — because if we look at on social media, we assume that everybody’s happy. Nobody goes on social media and “I fucking hate myself. I hate my life. My wife doesn’t love me. My kids hate me.” It’s like nobody’s gonna go there. They’ll take a great picture. 


[09:32] Pele Bennett: I think they’re using social media for their outlet. But that’s not a healthy way, you know, to let out your thoughts and whatnot when you’re still suppressing, you know, your anxiety or depression, whatever you’re going through. 


[09:44] Michael Bennett: And that’s why I think that I’m worried about America, the climate of America after all this pandemic, because it’s going to be a lot of self-salvation and a lot of revelations to people that they see as value. I don’t know if people are gonna be working the same. The output of America’s workplace might be different now because people might not see work as being as valuable as it was before. 


[10:08] Pele Bennett: That’s true because so many people are at home working and a lot of our friends and family are at home working. So that gives us more time to communicate more, whether it’s on phone, email, texting. But it’s kind of interesting because I’m like, well, that means a lot of the jobs in America, they can be at home, which for me is more thinking of having time to be more sane, having time with your family, having time in your home, it’s like almost your, you know, time for yourself. So I feel like there are new ideas on what that would look like moving forward. Like, can you do your job from home? But of course, is your home a healthy place? Because everyone is different. 


[10:41] Michael Bennett: Everybody’s home is different. But I definitely am worried about the psyche of each individual going back into America. Because even like, for example, we were talking about the movie theaters, like now going into the movie theaters, you got to wear a mask. You got to be far distanced from somebody. If you go into a restaurant — you can’t go to a bar. The strip clubs are gone. So I guess it’s definitely going to be a different America, and I wonder how people are going to deal with not being able to have the freedom that they used to have. It’s going to be a lot of people who are either going to be rebellious or people who are going to fall in line. But America is built on a revolutionary spirit from the beginning, because people think, you know, look at the way America’s supposed to be, people still keep those that hold true and dear and near to heart the Bill of Rights and the Constitution. Even though they don’t follow it, but as individual people don’t want any of their rights being suppressed. And the fact that they might not be able to go into the movie theater, I feel like there are people going to be unhappy even more, because now when they say it’s going to be safe to go and there are still going to be stipulations, people aren’t going to like the way things are gonna be in the future. 


[11:45] Pele Bennett: Yeah, because new laws are going to be created and policies are going to be created. There’s so many new things that are going to come out of this, I think that is so important for you to figure out yourself and your family. So when you do go out into our new world, because we don’t know what it’s going to look like, like how are you going to adapt to it? Because there is going to be stuff that we’re not going to want to do. I think there’s going to be even more of that. And there are going to be new laws that affect different communities in different ways. And that is going to be more of an issue. So it’s like, how do we adapt and how do we really come into this where we can actually help change? What do we do moving forward when there aren’t things that are in place against us? 


[13:47] Michael Bennett: I really think it goes back into our self, right? And it goes back to the Greek love, and I’ll let Pele read this one because it’s important — 


[14:00] Pele Bennett: Why Greek?


[14:01] Michael Bennett: Because the whole love thing.


[14:01] Pele Bennett: Philautia is known to be self-love or love of the self. And this can manifest in two ways as healthy or unhealthy. In the unhealthy version, it can lead to an overbearing amount of self-importance. While healthy philautia tends to be more connected to self-esteem and empowers the individual. So what does that mean to you, Michael? 


[14:24] Michael Bennett: It means that it’s not really about highlighting ourselves to, like, seem so important, but to really empower ourselves in a healthier way. Like really going out to, you know, really achieve the knowledge of ourselves. What really makes us happy? What really makes us tick? Is it really us putting a picture on and somebody liking it., you know, 25,000 times and it makes us feel important? Or is it being able to look in the mirror and say, I’m really happy with the person that I’m looking at. I’m really happy with the things I’m dealing with. I’m really happy with the trauma I face. And I think a lot of times that’s what we’re gonna be looking at in the future, is if we can go home and come out as America. And I think it goes to a lot of different things in America, too. I think America has to face now when we talk about individual, America has a lot of its own self-love that it needs to really go back. Because America has really been obsessed with self-important love. Where like each individual culture is more important to the next. America seems more divided than ever. But then it is like America to really have that self-important love and really the healthy love, America has to deal with the traumas of its past. It has to deal with the cultures that has taken advantage of, recognize their contributions to America, which has made America what it is in the 21st century. And I think America is so divided, when you look at some other countries, there’s a sense of like you, they love, love, love, everything about it.


[15:48] Michael Bennett: They love when people talk about it, they’re ready to go fight for it, whether it’s Italy or France or somewhere else but America, a lot of people will, you know, denounce America a lot and say, oh, I’m not that American. So I think a lot of a lot of us have a lot to deal with and really face ourselves as American citizens. As you look at the president and we say the 87,000 deaths is not a lot of deaths, you know. And, you look back, like, well, one death was a lot. And you talk about the value of people’s lives, and really coming out to saying that there is something in America that we really had to face, whether it’s economically or socially. There’s a lot of things that we need to face within ourselves. I think both of those battles are within the country in both those battles or within ourselves.


[16:31] Pele Bennett: So how do those two go hand-in-hand? You’re saying that America has to reflect on their past traumas, but you’re also saying people — I’m saying how did those two go hand in hand?

[16:41] Michael Bennett: I think people have to deal with their traumas and things that they have to face individually and be able to find a way to improve. I think we all have our images and things that we’ve put — like we said, we’ve become so obsessed with other people, other things that other people are doing that we haven’t had time to self improve. Sometimes in relationships, people will harp on the negative of their partner and not the positive of their partner. And after a while, the negative becomes so normal and normalized that you forget anything positive that the person has done, and then you just have a negative outlook on it. And I think in America, we’re having that within ourselves. We have a negative outlook on what our country is. The sense of patriotism has really changed into something that’s really negative, when you think of a patriot of America, people don’t see that as a positive. People see that as somebody who’s narcissistic and it’s a form of racism. 


[17:34] Pele Bennett: All these different communities that, you know, are being hit the hardest, I feel like because the communities are already dealing with so much from America, from past to present, unfortunately, I feel like this time has also been given so we can regroup our communities. Because now it’s like we can’t depend, through this pandemic, we can’t depend necessarily on the government. We can’t depend on a lot of other sources that normally we are trying, fighting, constantly fighting and is hitting, you know, the brick wall. We’re just hitting the brick wall and nothing is breaking. And so now it’s like, OK, now our communities can start, you know, thinking of how to become self-sustainable. OK, now we have to literally pick it up and do it ourselves. And now can we come together and work on our own things like working on our schools, building our families better, you know, working on your self-love. I feel like that part goes hand-in-hand with America is that our homes are so broken, you know. And then we’re looking to a system that is broken for us. So it’s like starting from the roots, starting from the soil and working our way up, and working on our relationships, working on how do we even treat each other. And I mean, like as your partner, as parents, you know, how do you teach your children, all these different things that we’re wanting, wanting. What we really need, it’s like we’ve ignored that. And now we’re going to the next step. That’s America. Hold on, wait. We’re not ready for y’all either. So I feel like this time is important that we have this downtime to work on those things. 


[18:57] Pele Bennett: And I feel like that is a lot harder than how I’m saying it. But I think, like, this downtime is giving us time that we have to face, like you said, each other in the mirror. We’re facing ourselves in the mirror. We’re facing each other as a reflection in our family. Like you’re looking at your children like are you a good parent to your child? Are you doing the most you can? I feel like all these different things are reflecting back to us. Your job. Why do you give so much to your job? What is your job right now giving back to you? It’s like not only the mirror, but it’s like so many things is a mirror of us because we put so much time and effort into it. But is it giving a return? And I think what your students were talking about for their schooling and for what they want to do in the future. It’s like as much as you’re putting out, you know, are you getting it back? And then after you figure that out, it’s like, OK, now what do I do? Because you literally are starting from zero again, like the world, it got to shed all of this shit from all of us humans. And now it’s shed it all, it’s starting from one. 

[19:55] Pele Bennett: So I feel like if we can just work on shedding our layers and figuring that out, then slowly building.


[20:03] Michael Bennett: I agree with you. I think we’ve got to look at ourselves as a caterpillar going into a cocoon and coming out the other side as butterflies. Because we have to be able to truly shed ourselves and look in the mirror. And I think, like you said, this self-awareness time and all this thing that we see that are valuable, we’re realizing we could be on social media for two hours and click 3,000 hearts and realize that that’s not really changing the world or is not changing who we are as individuals. And I think there is this sense of like when you talk about the value, it goes back to like us really putting into work. Is it giving value back to us? Because like, for example, like in the NFL, you give so much to the game, you get money back, but sometimes people leave in a broken state. People will give so much to a certain job and so that they’re just broken, you know? And I remember one time a player said his daddy worked in a factory for 30 years and he was so happy about his retirement. When he retired, they just gave him a plaque for 30 years of service. And he was like, wow, that’s all I get? You know, you miss birthday parties, you miss family, weddings, you miss all these things. “I gotta get back to work! I gotta get back to work!” Now America is kind of like in a place like, no, I need a drink, chill, drink often and live well. I just read that off a water bottle, guys. It’s a philosophy. 


[21:32] Pele Bennett: As much I like to preach, you know, spend time with your kids, sometimes you do hit those roadblocks and they’re like, “I don’t want to do what you want me to do. I don’t want to go read a book right now. I don’t want to play a game with you. I don’t want to cook in the kitchen.” Like sometimes you hit those roadblocks. So I told our oldest, I was like, look, Roblox or whatever it is, they’re obsessed with it. Like they legit could spend all day on it. And at one point I’m like, no, I’ve had no screen time. But I’m like, but, you know, this is actually something that you’re interested in, and you do like to put, you know, your talents — I guess this is a talent. You’re creative in it. And so now I’m like, hey, I was like, I understand you love playing this game, but how about as much as you love this, do a little bit into a bunch of different things. You know, like put your passion and your time into a lot of different things so you can just spend time on these different things that you’re naturally talented, or maybe you want to evolve in. And I’m like, you’re consuming so much time into one thing that you literally, to me, it’s like you’ve kind of given up on yourself. I’m like, what about everything else that you do love to do, though? 


[22:36] Michael Bennett: Yeah, I think I think we are at a point where we’ve got to be still and start to listen. You know, before I used to walk outside and I always had headphones on because I was outside, but the outside was just a scenery.


[22:50] Pele Bennett: Michael has headphones. It legit drives me crazy. You will be in such a zone in your music. And especially in the airport. I’ll be with the kids and the bags, we’re trying to wave you down. And I’m like damn, he has those headphones on.


[23:04] Michael Bennett: I like all the different sounds of music. But I think it’s like this moment where we’re being still. Now, when I take the headphones off and I really walk, I can actually hear the world talking to me. And I think each one of us is in that moment where we can actually hear our kids talking to us. Can actually hear us spouses talking to us. You know, sometimes Pele says something and I really don’t want to hear that shit. But then it’s really hard, it’s a real self reflection on how she really is seeing a situation. Before it was like, you weren’t trying to hear what she was saying because it was an ugly side of you that you didn’t really want to have to deal with. But now you look at it and you’re like, well, maybe she is right. Find more time to just listen to yourself and listen to your partners and listen to your kids. 


[24:07] Pele Bennett: Just be quiet. Sometimes no noise is actually a great noise. 


[24:14] Michael Bennett: But it’s like, you know, like, for example, I was telling my daughter, I said what if everybody loved each other, like we loved our phones. And I think America’s been that way in a lot of ways. And a lot of our society has been built physically present in every moment. We physically. I’m here. But are you mentally listening? I mean, Pele said to me the other day, sometimes you get so focused on what you’re doing, I’m sitting there talking to you, it’s like talking to a brick wall. I’m sitting here trying to defend myself. In actuality, she’s right. Sometimes I get so deep into my thoughts that I think about something in such a perplexed way that I start to think about different ways, how things can turn out like Dr. Strange, I’m like looking at different realities at one moment.


[24:55] Pele Bennett: Yes. You start sounding like a crazy person. You start getting paranoid. 


[25:01] Pele Bennett: And she’s right. And that’s an ugly thing to have to hear that sometimes you don’t want to listen to your spouse and you sound like a brick wall. You’re not talking back the way that you should be talking back. But that’s how we are sometimes, you’re present, but you’re not really listening. And I think America’s really dealing with this moment right now where we haven’t been present in a lot of ways. We haven’t been listening to what women are saying. We have been listening to what black people are saying about their rights. We have been listening to what immigrants have been saying all along about being essential to the fabric of America. And I think now we’re still, and we’re listening to the value of what a lot of people bring to society. 


[25:39] Pele Bennett: Yeah, so many people bring so much to the table, and in their absence, it really is a wake up call.


[27:19] Pele Bennett: So we’re all quarantined, we’re cooking every day, everybody is trying, you know, we’re making the most of it. And then restaurants start opening. And the first thing I’m like, oh, my God, what do I want to eat? It’s such a beautiful rainbow of foods because you’re like, I want tacos from this Mexican restaurant. I want this amazing pizza from this Italian place. You know, I want Chinese, I want Thai. I want Indian curry. And it just shows you like what a beautiful blend that America has. But it’s like everybody loves those things, you know, like everybody loves eating that food. And this is just food, you know. But I think, like, food does bring people together. So it really shows you on, like, the smallest little thing of food. You know, we can’t go get food. And now we’re able to go into these stores and support these small businesses and people that own these businesses that are from, you know, other countries, it just shows you how beautiful like America is that we’re able to get all of these things.


[28:11] Michael Bennett: Yeah. And it shows us that we are and people make great value to the things in society. And I think when we talk about the words essential and being still, I think it has given us this moment in society where people are like giving out things, giving to charity and doing more stuff and realizing that there’s people who have value to what we do every single day. And I think it’s not just doing a charity out in the world, because I think a lot of times we do so much charity out in the world so people can perceive us as great people. People can see the work that we’re doing, but we forget to do the charity at home and mend our relationships with our families. We are dealing with our essential people that we live with every day. Because when it was time to go to quarantine, the first thing was let me get my family, let me get my wife and let’s go in and make sure that they have everything to be safe and realize that they’re essential. And that’s a true charity. And it really starts at home, like my grandmother says, it’s like we really need to focus on our relationships within our own family. And I think that is something that’s really going to take us to a whole other level self and spiritually and physically and mentally that when we come out, we should be a stronger society. We should be a stronger nation. We should have stronger core values in our own family. And a core value within our neighbor. 


[29:34] Pele Bennett: I was just about to say that. Love thy neighbor. Michael also has become kind of a pastor during quarantine. 


[29:49] Michael Bennett: Yeah. If we loved our neighbor like we loved ourselves, that’s going to say a lot. But if we don’t love ourselves, we can’t possibly love other people around us. It’s just impossible. 


[29:57] Pele Bennett: But then also, do you judge someone on that?


[29:59] Michael Bennett: No, I think we have to get past the judging moment. I think we’ve been a judging culture. Right. We’ve been so judging on everything. And I think social media has allowed us to be judge, the juror, the executioner all in one quick tweet or on Instagram. We’ve been so judged, never really asking why is a person going through that. I think you do a great job with that. You always want to go to the root of why a person is feeling that way. How did they get to this moment? And I think we don’t do that enough. 


[30:29] Pele Bennett: So we have been doing a lot of Bible study. And I think something that I learned — or not learned, but just has like really set with me is like intent. Like intent in anything that you do. It’s like before you do something, are you planning on doing something, I feel like surrounding your thoughts around your intentions on that. What’s your purpose? What you’re wanting out of it and then moving with it. Because sometimes it goes so fast, so quick. And like you’re saying, if you’re referring to social media, you know, you just want to put stuff out. Maybe you’re bored. But I feel like if your intentions are like positiveness or you are wanting to be creative, you know, I think that is more powerful than you just aimlessly putting shit out just for the hell of it. And I feel like that’s intent into your family and intent to do your job, your career, your life goals. Like what is it that you want out of life? What is it that you want with your family? I just think that’s important. That’s something I have definitely picked up and have been trying to use more just on a daily basis.


[31:31] Michael Bennett: I would challenge everybody who is listening to the podcast to go figure out what kind of love that you want to be on your Greek mentions of love, the seven or eight different types of love. Be sure to tweet us on our Instagram and Twitter and stuff and tell us about it. But I think this love here is the highest form of love. It’s called agape, the highest form of love. Charity. The love of men of God. The words not to be confused with any other love. It is a universal, unconditional love that transcends and persists regardless of circumstances. And that’s the kind of love that we have to have for our fellow man. The essence of agape love is goodwill, benevolence and willful delight in the object of love. It is a beautiful love. So we have to go back and really look at this love that we’ve been dealing with and we’ve been so caught up in the erotics of love, like, oh, look at the girl’s butt. How big is that person’s cock? You know, people, women, everybody’s looking at objectifying people’s bodies, but nobody’s looking at somebody’s spiritual side. And we have to deal with that again. 


[32:51] Michael Bennett: Our pro tip today is to go search love. Search the type of love that can transcend your own self. They could transcend your family and look for love in different ways. As a partner, sometime your wife might not think sex is the type of love that she wants right now, and she might be like, I’m looking for another type of love or cuddle love or talking love. And I think that’s really hard for a lot of people to deal with the different types of love that there really are. 


[33:19] Pele Bennett: I think that goes hand-in-hand with affirmations., What are your affirmations for the day and what are your affirmations you’re maybe expecting from your partner, or from your family? And I think we always talk about us communicating, but it also goes hand-in-hand with our children. You know, like, let’s be honest, we’re all in the house. The kids go crazy sometimes. There’s only so much time we can give them to keep them busy as well as, you know, keep ourselves busy and do what we need to to get done. And so I think it’s just communicating that love and affirmation on to your children, like, what do they love that you do for them? You know, like you could literally ask, what do you love that I do for you? Like, what is the service I do for you that you love? And maybe it is a hug. Maybe it’s I love when you, you know, cook with me. It could be anything. And I think that goes with it can go beyond, you know, your partner and your family. But finding the love and also finding the affirmation. What goes in hand-in-hand with the love so that you’re communicating properly. 


[34:11] Michael Bennett: Yeah. This show is built on love. You find somebody that you really love and you give them a hug. It’s your brother. You gotta give him a hug. If it’s your wife, give her a kiss. Tell them that you love him because we’re coming out of this situation, and we’ve been built on hate for so long, the hatred of what other people have done, what they’ve done to us and our whole system has been built on hate. And because we’ve been built on hate so much that we are sowing seeds of hate so often that only thing has is growing on our trees of life is hate. 


[34:49] Pele Bennett: We were saying like, oh, go tell someone you love them. Ask them what you love. But it’s also like because those are words and emotions, you know, how do you put action behind it? So I think affirmation comes with it. But then also like literal action, like what can you do together that maybe your partner loves, or your children love? Your neighbor is like, hey, I am lonely. I actually love to go swimming, would you like to come swimming? I think sometimes it’s not only for you, but maybe you find something from it. So for example, like the girls love to cook. I love to cook. So recently the girls wanted to do a YouTube channel. And I was like, no, we don’t, you know, do YouTube, the girls and go on social media. And so we’re like, OK, we’ll let you guys do a YouTube channel, but I’ll just be cooking. It’ll just be our family. And I told them it has to be more healthy items because, you know, we’re gonna be honest. This is what we eat. We’re not making cakes all day, which Blake could do every day. So they did create a channel and they edit everything themselves. Peyton has really took a role to, you know, putting this time into something that she likes to do. And I’ll be honest, sometimes she’ll start editing a video and it’ll be an hour. And she’s like, OK, I’m over this. And I’m like, that’s fine, because you’re putting, you know, your talents and your passion into something for a little bit. You want to go ride a bike or you want to go read. Maybe you want to play back online. That’s fine. So they’ve been working on this and it’s just something that we can all do together that we all love and it’s all around food and at the same time they’re learning. So it has been amazing. So if y’all do you want to check that out, it’s on YouTube and it’s called Seki Cooking. Seki is a Samoan word. It means cool. So the girls are like it’s cool cooking and I like it. That’s perfect. So if you guys do want to go and check it out, go subscribe on YouTube. 


[36:42] Michael Bennett: Thank you guys for tuning in this week. Once again, we were talking about dealing with the traumas of ourselves and dealing with the traumas of our country and what we’re gonna look like in this new America that’s coming out of this cocoon. Are we going to be beautiful butterflies living in harmony and being different animals that can be able to eat and hang out with each other or are gonna go back to the ravishing ways that we must survive. So we must take over everything and everybody and make sure nobody has anything but me. Back to selfish love. Or we will find a way to be unconditionally connected to our other people in our community. And making our self and our place i n this world a lot better. It’s up to you, people. What are you going to do?


[37:34] Michael Bennett: Please subscribe to us or like us on anything that you’re listening to. Apple, Stitcher, Spotify, whatever you’re listening to get away from your family, whoever you don’t want to be around. And make sure you rate us or give us a comment. Even though we don’t give a fuck about your comments, give us a comment. Mouthpeace is a production of Lemonada Media, which you can find online on all social platforms @LemonadaMedia. You can follow me on social media, @MosesBread72. I love bread, and biblically, I always thought I was Moses.


[38:03] Pele Bennett: And you can follow me on Instagram at @pelepels. Mouthpeace with Michael and Pele Bennet is executive produced by us, the Bennets. Mouthpeace is also executive produced by Stephanie Wittels Wachs and Jessica Cordova Kramer. And of course, the whole team at Lemonada Media. Our producer is Genevieve Garrity and our show is edited by Brian Castillo. Thank you to our ad sales and distribution partners at Westwood One, and to all of our sponsors for making this show possible. Thank you for listening.


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