The Best Apologies of 2021
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Description
In our last episode of the year, Hoja, Kiki, and Mohanad take their picks for the best apology of 2021. Will it be Demi Lovato’s 10-minute long apology to an LA frozen yogurt shop? Ellie Kemper’s thoughtful response after being called a KKK princess? Or the TikTok viral apology from a Michigan boutique that accidentally told a job applicant she’s “not that cute”? Plus, Hoja apologizes to her core, Mohanad says sorry to a TSA agent, and Kiki recounts another awkward bathroom encounter on this week’s Sorry Not Sorry.
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Transcript
SPEAKERS
Hoja Lopez, Mohanad Elshieky, Kiki Monique
Kiki Monique 00:08
I’m Kiki Monique. And this is I’M SORRY, a podcast about apologies. And this week, I discovered that brand name gasoline is actually better than generic gasoline. I did not realize that, until I spent a little extra money on some brand name gasoline. And it was like I had a whole new car. I had to keep it under control. I was going so fast.
Mohanad Elshieky
Oh, I did not know that. I did not know it affects your driving.
Mohanad Elshieky
Well, I’m Mohanad Elshieky and this week and every week really I am, I am ready for the new year. I’m over 2021.It went by so fast. I cannot remember anything that happened this year. I just you know, I just want to put it behind me and then start the new year and see how worse it gets for all of us. Because I am done. Thinking that it will get better from here.
Kiki Monique
Good way. Yeah, I agree.
Hoja Lopez
And I’m Hoja Lopez. And this week, I’ve been thinking a lot about John Candy. And I don’t know why he’s just randomly popped into my head about four times. And that’s never really happened before. And I just miss him. You know, I was watching a couple of the movies that he was in, and then went on a tear to just find out more about him. He’s Canadian. I didn’t know that. I thought he was an American, all-American actor. But John Candy, I miss you. And I love your last name.
Mohanad Elshieky
I love when you learn some, like I think Canadian is okay. Like when I learned someone as a Canadian. Like, it makes sense. You know, you’re close. But I never feel more betrayed than when an actor is from the UK or from Australia. And I’m like I trusted you. And you’re British.
Kiki Monique
especially when they’re in your favorite like Southern show. Having this twang this whole time and you’re like, wait a second.
Hoja Lopez 02:06
We do not have a shared love experience; I hate you now. So this is our final episode of the year. So we are going to do a roundup of some of our favorite apologies of this year. So I want to start off by also saying that this is a surprise, we don’t know, each other’s apologies, which makes me really happy. So I am honored nay just delighted to present one of my favorite apologies of this year. And to start off with the fact that I’m a huge fan of this person. I have cried with them. I have laughed with them. I don’t know if you guys heard about Demi Lovato big yogurt apology. I don’t know if you guys heard but somewhere in April of 2021, Demi tried to go on their normal, you know daily yogurt run to a place called The Big Chill in Los Angeles, which you guys should check out maybe. And apparently what happened is that they were walking through the store and they started noticing that some of the yogurt, I guess the sweet treats were labeled as sugar free and that there was a lot of diet foods that were kind of you know, quote lining the walkway in front of the store. And Demi was very, very upset by this because obviously, you know, they’ve gone through, you know, eating disorders and they’ve that’s kind of like one of their big, sort of like points that they talk about a lot in their documentary and kind of part of their recovery includes this piece you know, so on April 18th ,Demi takes to their Instagram story, this is a Sunday.
Hoja Lopez
And then they kind of go after the company by saying they find it extremely hard to order from yo because of all the diet foods that they offer. And then also on that story called them kind of diet culture vultures. So there’s this big kind of like frenzy of people kind of calling out Big Chill, which is the fro yo shop, and then Big Chill reacts to the accusations. So they privately DM Demi, and they’re basically like, hey dummy, like we have items for all types of dietary restrictions. And it includes like diabetes and celiac disease and vegans, and then that they also offered like fully indulgent treats as well. So they’re sort of like defending themselves. And you know, Lovato then kind of criticizes them by saying that it was sort of like triggering an awful, and did you guys hear about this at all?
Mohanad Elshieky 04:45
No, this is all new to me.
Hoja Lopez
Okay, so first impressions, just first impression just based on what I’ve said, what do you guys think?
Mohanad Elshieky
Oh, yeah, I mean, this is the most famous person thing ever. just posting about fraud. Like, also, why are you buying that? Like, are you in the good place? What’s happening here? Just buy something else? I don’t know.
Kiki Monique
I mean, you’re at a fro yo place, which already, you’ve decided not to do the Ice Cream route, right? Like, I feel like you’ve already made the decision to go down the fro yo. So here we are. And obviously, a place that’s dedicated to you not wanting to get ice cream is going to also dedicate to like other things that maybe you don’t want to eat like sugar, or you can’t have sugar or you can’t have certain things like, it just seems logical.
Hoja Lopez
So I think kind of right off the bat, when I first heard of this, I was like, Demi, stop it, you are being like, insane about this stuff. It doesn’t make any sense, you know? And I do think that there’s definitely a touch of, sort of, like entitlement there. And I mean, like, when I was kind of reading the story, in general, I was just like, well, what is this restaurant? Then I figured out it has like, only like, 6000 followers online. Like it’s a small business, it’s not a chain. So it’s, you know, to a certain extent, it definitely feels like, you know, Demi is the Goliath and then the Bigg Chill is this, you know, like, is a very kind of like small fish to fry. Yeah, bigger scope of probably people who are doing things, you know wrong, specifically in the diet industry or with food. And so, I guess, when I start looking into it a little bit more closely. So what Demi is calling out is that they have these kind of very specific treats that use language, like guilt free, you know, I think it’s very, like, diet focus. And Demi talks a lot about, like, why should it be diet free? Or why should it be kind of shame free or guilt free? It’s that kind of verbage I think that Demi was attacking. But then we have this basic thing where people start piling on, you know, and people start going after Demi, like, why did you do this? Why did you say anything? Basically, because I think right out of the gate, they reacted very, very big for the level of like, what happened? And I feel like there’s this pattern of like, people deciding to call out specific people, versus generalizing the conversation, you know, what I mean?
Kiki Monique 07:19
I mean, cuz that’s, like, that’s the thing, like, this is more about the culture of diet, which is a huge conversation. And like, you know, a lot of the like, you know, what I saw online, people responding, where people who had dealt with eating disorders. And, you know, they had been through treatments. And they were saying how, when you’re in treatment, one of the first things, I guess, or one of the things you learn, is not, you know, projecting on to others, like sort of, like, you know, things that are internalized within you, you can’t blame what is happening outside and use that as an excuse or something like that.
Hoja Lopez
Yeah, there’s, it is something really interesting that when we feel hurt, and when we feel like somebody has hurt us, as humans, I definitely think that we’re like, trying to figure out the source of that, so that we can feel like we’re in control, and we can shut it down and move forward. And so there’s some internal regulation that needs to happen, or else what you’re just gonna go around being like wounded in the world. It’s hard to, it’s hard to move. It’s hard to do that, you know, it’s hard to progress. But, I mean, I definitely when I read this, I was like, Demi, stop, you need to stop this, you are my favorite. I need you to just get a frickin grip. And then again, as it develops, I see all these people piling on to them. And so I’m like, let me look into this story a little bit more. And so they do end up apologizing so I’m just gonna let you guys listen to Demi’s apology.
Hoja Lopez
So Demi kind of opens up a little bit about you know, their issues with their body image and issues with an eating disorder, and kind of posted a video explaining why they slammed the big chill in LA. And, you know, they kind of talked about being very outspoken about all the things that they believe in. And I feel like they’re trying to do their best to call something out. And they just sort of decided that maybe attacking the business in particular, wasn’t the exact right thing to do. And it’s somebody who is learning how to be an advocate for themselves after being, you know, in a situation where they probably didn’t have a lot of voice and especially when you’re out there, and you do see people who are you know, like diet culture vultures, or people who were basically calling, or like, taking advantage of people’s insecurities in order to like, deal, whatever it is that they’re selling. So to a certain extent, I really appreciate the apology. And once I looked into it a little bit more, I was like, I can totally see where they were coming from. Yes, just when you have that many followers, honey, it’s gonna have some effects.
Kiki Monique
Yeah, to attack a small business. Yeah, it’s like, I think that is really you know, what set people off because this small business isn’t the one that created diet culture. They’re just trying to make a dollar.
Mohanad Elshieky
What I mean, the good thing, I guess, that came out of this, because I know they, you know, they had a small following at first. But now I’m looking at it. And I’m like, wow, they have 47,000 followers. So I guess. Thank you, Demi. I mean, we should name this episode, The Bigg Chill meets No Chill.
Hoja Lopez
That’s exactly it. Oh, my God. And, you know, it’s so interesting, because one of the things they talk about too, is like, oh, there’s like food for celiacs. And for vegans and all that. And Demi was like, we’ll then label it that way, like, label it for medical needs, label it, you know, but that terminology of guilt free is really kind of triggering basically.
Kiki Monique 12:00
Like if I mean, I if I had celiac disease, I don’t know if I necessarily want to pick up a packaging that says like, for celiacs like, maybe I don’t want people knowing all my business like if it said, like, you know, for fat girls only […]. I don’t need it to be like, on the thing.
Mohanad Elshieky
Yeah. And I mean, like, it’s just like bigger fish to fry, you know, to like corporations, and there’s like a whole industry that kind of advertises that culture, but coming as a just like a fro yo shop, like, what’s that gonna do? Like, that’s not gonna fix shit.
Kiki Monique
Yeah, use your anger and just go after Jillian Michaels. Like, let’s just blame her for everything.
Mohanad Elshieky
Yeah, there’s so much else like, you know, other than that account that like, had 600 followers at a time. You know, it’s just it. I mean, yeah, obviously, they should update the labeling and like change the language and all of that. But that could have been an email.
Hoja Lopez
And if you get an email from Demi Lovato at The Bigg Chill, you probably gonna listen You’re probably gonna, like take it into account.
Mohanad Elshieky
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. But probably they had like some, like 19 years old, like, social media person who was like, well, Lovato just tagged us. I am not paid enough to deal with this.
Hoja Lopez
Yeah, absolutely not. I feel like if a big celebrity comes into, you’re probably very excited, having a very good time. And then all of a sudden, you realize that the world is ending because Demi Lovato is tweeting about you. And you’ve got to deal with a major PR thing. But hey, it’s true. They did end up with a lot more followers, which is very good.
Mohanad Elshieky
Yeah, exactly. So it’s not all bad.
Hoja Lopez
No, it’s not all bad. And I think one of the reasons why I chose this to be kind of like, my favorite apology of 2021 is, there’s a part of me that really understands the Demi plight, which to feel like, sometimes you feel like you want the world to be built for you, you want to be able to navigate the world. It’s sort of like a basic part inside of me that identifies with what they did. And I want to be able to, you know, call things out in the right way. But there’s always a dial, you know, like, as you’re learning, like, for example, when I learned how to, like, get in touch with my anger, this is a period of time in my life, where I went overboard sometimes I was like, okay, you’re allowed to feel angry. It’s not necessarily a bad emotion. But sometimes I would turn that dial a little too harshly, and people around me to be like, whoa, you’re being a little bit […]. And I feel like I’m so sorry. I’ve learned to do my anger. And so I feel like Demi is doing that, like Demi’s figuring out a moment where they get to be outspoken about the things that they believe in, and they’re making mistakes, and they’re not doing it perfectly. And I think the thing that intersects with it that makes it funny for me is that they are a celebrity and they make a lot of money and have all these privileges and so it’s always balancing like what you want, who your audience is, with who you’re calling out.
Kiki Monique
Now I want to go to Bigg Chill after this. Maybe after we’re done.
Hoja Lopez
Give us a review. I would love that. I would love that so much.
Kiki Monique
You know, I have seen a lot of obscure apologies over this last year because I’ve spent an inordinate amount of time on TikTok, and in TikTok world, there’s someone canceled every day. I mean, every day, there’s somebody that you’ve never heard of. And I really dig into these people’s lives, or it’s just like, Ooh, I’ll go back. And I’m like, let me find that video. Let me find that video. How did they? And I’ll get to the bottom of like, why is this person now on private? Or why have they deleted their account? So I feel like I’ve just seen a lot of apologies. And like, because of that I’m a little like, numb to just apologies in general, like, whether it’s good or bad. So to me, like how I’m weighing good, it’s just like, how much it sticks with me and like how memorable it is. It’s like, that kind of made it like a really good apology. And so this apology had sort of all the elements of like, I felt like, what TikTok is about. First of all, Gen Z has perfected the art of bullying, like I have been on the other side of like getting called out by Gen Z, it is very uncomfortable there. I don’t know how they were able to make the word weird and weirdo so cutting, but when they say it to you, it just hits like really differently.
Kiki Monique
Like when they throw a clown emoji at you I just the shame I feel getting bullied by Gen Z is like no other shame. So back in like this, I think this was like back in July, there was a girl. I don’t know if we have her name but a girl on TikTok, she had applied for a sales model position. It was at this boutique called Ava Lane boutique. It was in Michigan, and you know, boutique owner was this woman, Laura. And I guess as a story came out, the person who normally handles HR was out that week. So her husband, who is like the vice president of the company, stepped in to that role. And so this, this resume comes in, and he kind of quickly looks it over. And instead of forwarding it to his wife, he replied back to the person who had sent it, which you know, that’s like, the biggest fear is like hitting reply instead of forward. So he replies to this girl. And the response is, this girl is fresh out of college, Hope College and not that cute. She applied to the sales model position. Are you sure you want me to interview her? Thanks. And this girl, she’s probably you know, she just got out of college. She’s probably 20-21. Gets this email and obviously feels terrible.
Kiki Monique 18:39
So he puts it on TikTok, you know, and just kind of like yeah, I applied for this job. And this is the response I got, which sent tick tock into an uproar. Like, how dare this chuck, his name is Chuck de Grendel. How dare this Chuck, say that you are cute. You’re totally cute. I’m like, oh, I’m invested now. So then he tried, I guess like when it sort of like started going viral or no, I think even before it sort of going viral, he realized his mistake. He realized he had sent this back to her and wanted to apologize an email. So the email he wrote, he said, Dear Grace, your email was forwarded to me from our customer service team. First off, I feel terrible about this. It was never my intention to send that email to you. That is 100% my fault. And I’m so sorry for what I did. Despite this being a modeling position. You’re absolutely correct. It is not our company’s core values to judge someone based on their appearance. Please understand that we receive hundreds of modeling applications per week, and I often have to make quick decisions based solely off someone’s resume and a few pictures we receive regarding whether or not we should move forward with the interviewing process. Regardless, I made a snap decision based off the information I had and understand now that was a poor decision. I really appreciate that you reached out to us and provided to meet with the opportunity to reflect on my poor decision and lack of professionalism, I cannot express how sorry I am, I wish you the best of luck in your job search and your future endeavors which, okay, he apologize, you know, and she posted those, but the internet, was still not happy.
Kiki Monique 20:22
So this man, this Chuck, which Oh god, I mean to even like just be called not cute by a guy named Chuck already right? This guy named Chuck, his wife, this is her boutique, right? He’s just liked the guy that probably like does the books, right? She’s like, this is my booty. So I think she must have forced him to do an IG live because he goes and does an IG live that every time I watch it, I just laugh. And the best part is, it feels like his wife is off camera holding a gun to it, because not what to be there. But you got to hear a part of it. We’re going to play a little bit of a clip. He’s crying throughout this apology, which already just feels cringy. And then again, Gen Z is not letting him have it. It’s clown. Like because it’s live. So there’s everyone’s commenting. It’s clown emojis. It’s laughy emojis, it’s like, oh my god, it’s like, oh, you know? Yeah, this is embarrassing, and I feel bad for you. And he’s like, basically can’t even look at the camera. He can’t even keep eye contact with the camera. He’s sort of looking down. He’s so ashamed every time and when he has to sort of repeat that he called this girl not cute. He can’t even you know, get the words out. It’s the most uncomfortable apology video. It goes on for like, seven minutes. And I mean, it goes the live goes on longer, but his even just his part is like seven minutes. And then at the end is you know; wife comes in to sort of like clean it up. But to me, it was just the most, I just found it to be the most entertaining apology because it was just so cringy.
Hoja Lopez
Oh my God. He was basically going on a live to it’s almost like, you know, in the old times when they put people in plazas and put their hands and head through a thing and then they just had people in the plaza throw shit out. Like that’s what it Instagram Live apology is, it’s just a live version of Twitter. And it seems like a terrible idea. It’s just a bad idea to do an Instagram live apology.
Mohanad Elshieky
I don’t think you should ever apologize. Was there like comments like just coming in? I can’t even cuz like, people don’t care. They don’t know you. And they’re having fun. So like, you’re not even listening to what you’re saying. So no matter of crying. Nothing you will say that will make someone go like you know what? I take back my clown emoji. Let Thumbs up emoji, sir. This is great.
Kiki Monique 24:20
Yeah, yeah, the funniest part like I went and looked, because you know, the first thing people do when you know, anytime a business does something is they immediately go to Yelp, Google, and they make sure that your reviews hit zero stars if possible. And I kind of looked I was like looking at the reviews now and it doesn’t seem like they’ve even fully recovered in that realm which I know Yelp will do like a business has gone viral and we’re doing a cleanup, they’ll stop the reviews but like Google, I don’t know if they’ll ever clean that up.
Mohanad Elshieky
I mean, do you think, what do you think they thought that was a good idea. Like for the life to happen?
Hoja Lopez
Were they older?
Kiki Monique
Seem like they’re maybe in their 40s they seem like, you know, like a couple in their 40s. And I think that they knew that they had to address it, right? They had already, you know, he addresses in the apology that they’ve gone and shut down their social media, because obviously everyone had like, trashed, you know, their Facebook and their Instagram and all of that. I think even now, the comments look like they’re back on, but I think they haven’t limited to like, if you follow me, because it didn’t look like they had many comments proposed when I looked. But I think, you know, we still don’t have a roadmap, right? This is why we have this show. We’re still trying to figure out the roadmap to apologies, you don’t know what you’re doing. When your business is getting attacked online, you’re like, okay, let’s address it head on. We’re not going to hide behind this. Let’s, you know, because I do believe in the philosophy of, you know, public shaming should be addressed with like, a public apology, like, you should address things behind the scenes, you know, too, but if you’ve been, if you’ve publicly embarrassed someone, you should be public apologies. Now, they hadn’t publicly embarrassed her. She put it out there. She put the email out there. You know, she didn’t have to do that. And so that’s sort of like, that’s where it gets weird, right? Because when these things happen, where you feel wronged, you want to bring attention to it, but you know, what’s gonna happen, like, you know, this business is gonna get it. And think about future employers, right? Like, this girl still needs to get a job. As somebody who is hiring somebody, if I typed your name into Google, and that came up, I’d be leery about hiring you because if I ever have to fire you, how are you going to drag me?
Mohanad Elshieky 26:44
Also the other end of it, which is, you know, I mean, I think this whole thing could have been handled differently. But on the other hand, I’ve just like, people in the industry in general, need to stop saying shit like this, like stop being mean. You know, every time like a bunch of emails come out. It’s always shit like this, you know, like, just like shit that you’re not supposed to say. And they feel so comfortable saying it. Because like, I don’t know if you remember that there was this, you know, this video. The cannot remember the name of the person, but he’s in white lotus. He was auditioning, and then the director made a comment about his living space and how poor it is. And he heard that and then, you know, he shared that. And I just like, you hear the clip, and you see how comfortable the director was, like saying that, because that’s just how they talk about people in general. And it just sucks. I mean, like, I get it, you don’t want to hire people for any reason. There is no need to go after them. Or like, you know, they’re like, how they look or like their living spaces or like, keep it professional.
Kiki Monique
But it’s weird because like, if it’s a sales model position, like we have accepted that if you go to Hooters if you can’t fit into those, little orange cut off pants, they’re not hiring you, I’m never gonna fit in those orange pants. And maybe I do want to work at Hooters. Is it fair?
Hoja Lopez 28:13
I would come to see you every weekend.
Kiki Monique
Crab legs are great. I like Hooters. And you know, I need a little extra cash. So maybe I should work.
Hoja Lopez
This is my favorite tangent ever. Let’s just keep talking about that.
Kiki Monique
Like if I sent my resume to Hooters and they replied to me, and they were like, oh, this girl’s not gonna fit into the orange pants. Like, can I get mad? Because I know that you’re supposed to be able to fit into these.
Mohanad Elshieky
Absolutely, yes.
Hoja Lopez
I love the implication, Kiki is that, that she should have known she wasn’t cute enough.
Mohanad Elshieky
Here’s the thing, though. Like you said, these are like their standards, right? So instead of just like, you know, specifying what that thing is, you could just be like, this person does not meet our standards. We’re not going to hire them. And that’s it.
Kiki Monique
Mohanad, were you the HR person out for the day? Because that actually is a perfect response. If not, you need to take over that position. Because you’re right. It doesn’t have to be specific.
Hoja Lopez
It doesn’t make sense for them to now change and pivot their language a little bit. So that they can just avoid the situation in the future honey.
Kiki Monique
So yeah, so I love this apology for 2021 Just because, A, it just gives me giggles I like to have certain like go to things that make me laugh every once in a while that it’s so obscure, and people might not know and I get to reference it every once in a while and be like, oh, you haven’t seen this and bring it up over and over again. And also it’s just a reminder that I’m never going to have kids because kids are cruel.
Mohanad Elshieky
They definitely are, I also don’t want to have kids in general.
Hoja Lopez 30:03
Me neither.
Kiki Monique
Child free by choice squad.
Hoja Lopez
Alright Mohanad, you’re up.
Mohanad Elshieky
Okay, so the apology that I picked will not be something new to you too because this was supposed to be our first episode, but then Chrissy Teigen took over. Classic crazy Teigen. Took the spotlight. I’m just joking. But we’re just joking. The person I picked as my favorite apology is Elizabeth Claire Kemper. You might know her as the unbreakable.
Mohanad Elshieky
Kimmy Schmidt, Aaron from the office.
Kiki Monique
Yes, love Ellie Kemper.
Mohanad Elshieky
Or famously known as being born in Kansas City, Missouri. That’s what I know her from personally. But you know, the last May she came under fire because there were some photos that resurface online of her, you know, she was participating in this beauty queen, you know, competition or whatever you want to call it a pageant in an organization that historically excluded black and Jewish people. And that organization was in you know, St. Louis, Missouri. And she was crowned as the field profit queen of love and beauty. And that’s the name of the organization is called the field profit organization. Which I feel like you hear the name of the organization and the first thing that comes to mind like yeah, racism.
Kiki Monique 32:08
You would think, right? Like, I mean, slight tangent, but like, I just watched the Von Dutch documentary that came out. It’s an interesting documentary you should watch. And by the end of it, we all find out that Von Dutch was apparently like a Nazi. Nazi sympathizer. He called himself a Nazi. Which I, it’s weird. And then but then, at the end, I was like, Von Dutch of Germany. How did we not piece this together earlier?
Mohanad Elshieky
Yeah. It’s very interesting. Whenever you look into the roots of anything, you’re like, oh, cool. I mean, to be honest, he also went to Princeton, I feel like colleges are also famously known for being really good and never having problematic paths.
Hoja Lopez
Especially the old ones.
Mohanad Elshieky
But yeah, I mean, and that, like the, you know, she was crowned the queen of love and beauty. It was like, 1999. And she was 19 back then. So like, you know, not a kid, but still not aware of what was happening with that organization, because that organization had like races and ladies like origins. And I don’t know if you guys been to St. Louis, Missouri before. I went there, like, not too long ago. And I remember this story, and I was like, okay, yes, makes sense. I can see it; I can see the vibe here. But you know, this is an organization that was co-founded in 1878 by a former Confederate officer. So you can see why it wasn’t very inclusive.
Hoja Lopez
It also gives major like conspiracy Illuminati vibes, you know, like, veiled Prophet Queen of love and beauty. It just sounds like creepy. Like it would have been Lovecraft country or something like that.
Mohanad Elshieky 34:06
Or a Midsommar kind of thing, you know, where they just put someone in a bear suit, and then just said, set them on fire. And she gets to pick that person.
Kiki Monique
And it kind of sounds like some of their, like, older, like masquerade balls, did kind of lean towards that. So it did have roots in that.
Mohanad Elshieky
Exactly. Yeah. And, you know, these pictures came out, and people were not happy about them, because people did some research. And we’re like, well, this is a racist organization. Why are you, you know, why were you in it? It doesn’t make any sense. And the thing that I found that was very interesting, is that first of all, people immediately started calling her the, like, a KKK Princess, or like KKK queen or something like that, which I would say kind of too much. Yeah, yeah, let’s chill because like, you know, after like a while, like some people did research and we’re like, Okay, this organization had no connections to the clan at all. So maybe let’s stop calling her that. But the funny thing is like, this was not a secret before these pictures came out, because I did some, you know, looking at when I found that there was an article from 2009 from it was St. Louis Post Dispatch, they did a profile on her, and they included that as something good. You know, they were like in 1999 in a white gown she would like attended by […] and pages of the veal profit, queen, love and beauty. And now in 2009. She’s in the office. And I’m like, what a cool transition. Why are we competitive this in the office?
Hoja Lopez
Feel like we should be proud of her for many reasons. I know that the Kemper family, there’s a big Kemper building in Houston, Texas where I used to live. And so I was like, I wonder if that has anything to do with Ellie Kemper and I was like, oh my god, it has so much to do with Ellie Kemper. And then I was like her family is worth almost like a half a billion dollars, I think it’s like $450 million, or something like that. And that’s the wealth that they got to accumulate through those kinds of organizations that other people will say who did not get to accumulate and it definitely like that old money thing is always so entrenched with like slavery and with racism that I don’t think that there’s like a very rich person in America that obviously all of us that have not benefited from that but in this case with Kemper, it’s like such a clear line, that I think people are outraged not just by like her particular relationship to it, but in general by the relationship of rich people, to these weird organizations that obviously excluded, you know, people of color.
Mohanad Elshieky
Also something funny, and I’m sure I don’t know if you’ve, Hoja, you like never, like, ever noticed that. But there’s also this connection between like, you see someone and they like, usually they live in Brooklyn, and they get like fame really quick, doing comedy and all of that, and you’re like, oh, wow, I guess they’re very good. And then you learn that, like their parents are like millionaires or something.
Hoja Lopez
You guys, that happens really often.
Mohanad Elshieky
It’s truly the ultimate betrayal. When you go to someone wiki page, and then in the parents section, the parents are both in blue. They have clickable links. And I’m like, wow, I thought you were one of us.
Hoja Lopez
I thought you were slumming it.
Kiki Monique
Yeah, like if we’re not starving artists together, like fuck you. Like, you could have been taking me out to dinner this whole time. We were just pretending and eating ramen together.
Mohanad Elshieky 38:01
Exactly. And it’s so funny because I always had these people in my life. And you never know what they do for work. Because they have these nice apartments. I don’t know what you do for work. I feel like I’ve asked multiple times and you said something like, freelance or whatever. And then you’re like, oh, okay. I see.
Hoja Lopez
I’m independently wealthy, and will forever, to no account of my own.
Mohanad Elshieky
Exactly, but at least I’ll say that she did have a, you know, had a really good apology. And she posted that on Instagram. And I mean, it’s kind of long, so I’m not gonna read all of it. But, you know, she talked about like being 19 years old. She talked about the organization, and she said that, you know, was unquestionably like, racist, sexist, and has an elitist past, and that she was not aware of the history at a time. But Ignorance is no excuse, you know, I was old enough to educate myself before getting involved. And then she said, I unequivocally deplore, denounce and reject white supremacy, at the same time, economic privilege. And then she talked about, like, you know, how the comments on the internet made her feel like, you know, you become the subject of like, internet criticism. And the first thing you think about, like, these people are wrong, they don’t get it. But then she was like, at some point, I realized that a lot of the forces behind the criticism are forces that I spent my life supporting and agreeing with, so it you know, makes sense. And it was, I mean, I liked it. It was good. She covered everything. She was not defensive. She was not like, I did not know, please leave me alone. Cancel culture everyone is coming after me. People are mean.
Hoja Lopez
I had no idea. I was too young. Yeah, it was just like, acknowledging all the different sides of it kind of.
Mohanad Elshieky
Exactly. And it’s also good to you know, tell people to you know, educate themselves and all of that so it’s I don’t know, I liked it because specially there are so many bad apologies this year.
Kiki Monique 40:04
Yeah, I mean, that’s the thing. Like, I felt like, once you took the time to look into this organization, it was clear that this is something it was like a country club to these people in St. Louis. Like, if you were rich, you were part of the society. And that’s just the way it is. And she is under the thumb of her rich parents probably doesn’t want to lose her inheritance. They’re like, get in this pageant. You know, you just when you’re a kid, you do the things that people your parents make you do, especially if they’re the ones paying your bill, sending you to Princeton buying you apartment, so that you can go, you know, be an actress like, yeah, you’re gonna join the pageant.
Mohanad Elshieky
Exactly. And it’s just one of those things also, like, this is someone like we’ve watched on TV, we seen her interviews, we feel like, you know, we know her. She’s not a KKK person.
Hoja Lopez
I wonder if that white dress at the ball also came with a hood with holes in it. Like probably not.
Kiki Monique
There’s so many other celebrities that have never been a part of the Veiled Prophet ball that I would be quicker to call the KKK person. And I don’t even know, but I just would.
Mohanad Elshieky
Exactly, no, it was, you know, anyway, it was too much. I’ve read so many of the tweets and it’s just like, I mean, fucking chill. Like, yeah, yeah, let’s talk about, like, how bad the organization is, let’s let you know. Like, it just feels like one of these things where you can like everyone like can learn together. And also, like, I say that the at the beginning, like being in an organization with a racist past, literally, I mean, like, like you said, Kiki, you know.
Hoja Lopez
You mean every organization on earth.
Kiki Monique
I live in America; I live in an organization with a racist. Just saying I’m American feels raised Exactly.
Mohanad Elshieky
Exactly. Most of the colleges that people go to have like a racist, like, no one is saying this excuses any. But like, as long as you’re not participating in that, you’re not actively making it worse, then I don’t know what to tell you.
Kiki Monique 42:12
Our economy was built off slavery. And when we just acknowledge that, like, that’s what we need to acknowledge, that’s we’re trying to get people to acknowledge. And this is why reparations is like, reparations is a thing, because you are still making money off of the economy that existed for so long that you can’t even detach it. Your economy says they exist because of those yet you won’t acknowledge it. So that’s what it is.
Hoja Lopez
Yeah. Again, pointing to the whole thing. It’s like pointing at another person without taking responsibility or accountability for your own peace in it. It don’t make no sense. And Ellie is, she just happens to be a famous person. And it happens to catch on that she was a part of something. And it’s just also almost like luck based or like, random that certain people get called out and other people do not get called out. But I’m glad she’d responded that way. I thought it was a good apology too
Mohanad Elshieky
Okay, and now it’s time for my favorite segment, which we do every week. Sorry, not sorry, where we either demand apologies from people or apologize to someone. So we’ll, we’ll see what we have this week. Oh, how what’s happening?
Hoja Lopez
Let’s see. Well, I would like to apologize to the core of my body. I have heard a lot of things about the core of people’s bodies. And my core is gone without a lot of attention for a while. When I walk, I go upstairs, I use my legs, I use my knees. I use everything. But what people tell me to use, which is my core. And I just realized I’m just going around becoming sort of like weak. And so I’ve been doing, I’ve been doing just some different interesting exercises and lunges and different things. And I have now been engaging my core. Yeah, and I do I do want to let everyone know that. I don’t like it. But it kind of feels good. And it makes me slightly happy afterwards. So I’m really relying on that, I’m relying on I’m engaging my core to feel slightly happy afterwards. I do planks and I last maybe 10-12 seconds. Not a very long time. And I give up quite a bit. You know, I just go off baguette. But then I you know start up again. Yeah, but I just who is she, the core, as she’s been famous to me for so long, but I’ve never met her. Yes. So, you know, for people out there who don’t know her. Try it out. I don’t know. You might hate it. You might like it.
Kiki Monique 44:57
Yeah, she’s like undercover in your 20s It’s after 30 where all the sudden it’s like, Oh, Miss Core, I’ve been ignoring you, should have pay more attention to you because my back is killing me.
Hoja Lopez
Correct. And for someone with a you know, like me for having a honking boobs, everybody just in case you can’t see them in the podcast, she needs a strong, thick stem to hold all that up. You know what I mean? So I just want to apologize to her for not thinking about her not being a good friend for a second. But, you know, I hope that we can, you know, just start a beautiful friendship.
Mohanad Elshieky
Wow. Surely tears in my eyes. That’s amazing. Love to hear about friendship. Well, Kiki, have you discovered any parts of your body this week?
Kiki Monique
I have discovered a lot of parts of my body and they all hate me. And that’s pretty par for the course. But, you know, I’m grateful. I’m very grateful. And it sort of kind of goes along with my apology, I would like to apologize to not only the girl in the wheelchair that was in the bathroom that I went into, anyone who might be in a wheelchair in the bathroom that I entered to, because I’m gonna say it, look, I’m fat. And I always use the handicap accessible stalls, I just do. And it’s just has more room and I am sorry for that. And I’ve never gotten caught in all of these years, I’ve never gotten caught. And I went into a bathroom. And you know, drinking, I was doing my thing, you know, headed straight towards the handicap accessible stalls, as I do. And I reached for that door. And there was a girl in a wheelchair and in the mirror, you know, she had just left the stall. She was getting ready. And I reached for that door. And I just I like did that thing I kind of like, you know, when you trip and you like start to run because you pretend like I didn’t trip I was just running. I kind of just grabbed the door like, that door is in my way, let me close it and go to this other stall that I was going to go to originally, obviously not that handicap accessible stall. And then I use the regular stall. And I think she waited, I make sure that I wasn’t gonna switch because I was gonna switch let’s be real, I was absolutely gonna leave that stall, get to the bigger stall. But she waited. And then when I you know, flushed and came out, then she left. And I was like, wow, I was busted. But look, I’m sorry, because it’s not going to stop me. I’m going to keep using that bigger stall in the future. And I am apologizing for it because I know I’m going to do it.
Hoja Lopez 48:00
I feel like there’s a Venn diagram of people who use like, those stalls and to people who only put their carts back in those little aisles when other people actively watching you. That is an absolute overlap.
Kiki Monique
I always put my cart back. I will say that I always put my cart back even when nobody’s watching.
Hoja Lopez
Oh, I also want to let you know that I absolutely use the roomy, I call them luxury bathrooms. They’re like designer bathroom.
Kiki Monique
I mean, sometimes they come with their own sink.
Hoja Lopez
Outrageous.
Mohanad Elshieky
Yeah. I mean, I never did that. I’m a better person. I mean, it’s okay. I mean, someone has to be good, like a good person on this podcast. But, you know, I’ve been, you know, I’ve been traveling a lot for comedy since, you know, the pandemic now allows us to travel. And, you know, that means, you know, spending so much time at the airports and I had a very early flight. And I was going through the TSA and you know, like when you get to the TSA they asked for you know, your ID and your ticket and all of that. And, you know, I did not pay attention. So instead of handing my ID, I gave the agent my credit card.
Kiki Monique
Trying to buy them off.
Mohanad Elshieky
Exactly. I looked like I do the worst bribes ever. Like I looked. I look like I’m the new to the cartel or something just like you know, but the thing is, you know, he held it there and just like, you know, confused, and I said, after realizing is my credit card. I was like, hey, when you give it like a little swipe and just let me keep my laptop in my bag. And he did not like that. He did not like that he was upset. And so my apology is to this man for having no sense of humor. I hope you recover, sir.
Hoja Lopez
I will say airports flights. TSA, they do not like a sense of humor. They don’t love it.
Mohanad Elshieky 50:06
They don’t like anything. And you know I’m I feel sorry for that man like that he’s just going around just humorless just stopping people. I also love that they asked you to like lower your mask just to see like your face and match it to your ID and it just like, I feel like the upper half of my face really? If it matches, like, I don’t know what he what do you think is gonna happen? Like, am I gonna take the mask off and it’s just like a whole different person?
Kiki Monique
But it’s like, it just goes against everything. It’s like you want me to take my mask off to show my face? But God forbid I tried to have a cocktail on the flight if I’m not putting that mask up between every sip, I’m getting on you know put on the blacklist.
Mohanad Elshieky
I gotta admit, I do this thing where like I ordered like an ask for a coffee, like during the flight and then it does not matter how long the flight is, four hours, six hours I’ll drink the coffee for six hours. I’ll just hold it like this. I’m like I’m drinking sorry like, but yeah, I mean, I’m pro mask but you know if there are loopholes I’ll fucking use them.
CREDITS
I’M SORRY is a Lemonada Media Original. The show is produced by Alex McOwen, supervising producer is Kryssy Pease. Our executive producers are Stephanie Wittels Wachs and Jessica Cordova Kramer. Our mix is by Kat Yore and theme music was composed by Xander Singh. If you like this show, please rate and review. And please don’t cancel us. You can find out more about our show at @LemonadaMedia on all social platforms, or follow us on Instagram at @imsorry_podcast. We’ll be back next week and until then be nice, play fair and always say I’m sorry. Thanks for listening!