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Description

Kiki, Hoja, and Mohanad sit down with America’s COVID dad and host of the In the Bubble podcast, Andy Slavitt, to answer all of your COVID-related apology questions. Who owes us an apology for Omicron? Does Trump need to say sorry to Biden for exposing him to COVID? Should we feel remorse for the joy we get when anti-vaxxers get sick? Plus, Mohanad asks for an apology from his barber and Kiki says sorry to Mother Earth on this week’s edition Sorry Not Sorry.

Please note, I’m Sorry contains mature themes and may not be appropriate for all listeners.

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Keep up with Andy on Twitter @ASlavitt and Instagram @andyslavitt.

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For additional resources, information, and a transcript of the episode, visit lemonadamedia.com.

Transcript

SPEAKERS

Hoja Lopez, Andy Slavitt, Mohanad Elshieky, Kiki Monique

Kiki Monique  00:08

I’m Kiki Monique and this is I’M SORRY, a podcast about apologies. And this week I spent like two hours reorganizing my living room to try to make my, you know, desk work from home space like just a little cuter and then spend another two hours putting it exactly the way I started because it just didn’t work.

Mohanad Elshieky 

And this is Mohanad Elshieky. This week, I’m honestly just ready for January. I’m over December. I think it’s a weird month. Like I think we should go from November to January.

Hoja Lopez 

If you get rid of December, the Starbucks Christmas people are gonna be so upset at you and it’s gonna be another notch on the war against Christmas. We can’t afford that as a country.

Mohanad Elshieky

I am at the front line of that word Christmas, if you’re listening right now I will not rest until I destroy Christmas.

Hoja Lopez 

And I’m Hoja Lopez and this week I meditated three times and each time I could not let the thoughts pass through my head without like focusing intensely on the thoughts I’m not good at meditation yet you guys every time I have a thought it is a swirling tornado rabbit hole that I must enter until I like I don’t know have memorized every winner of repulse drag race for every season. It’s just too much going on in there you guys say maybe I need to do one of those like sensory deprivation chambers for a frickin break.

Kiki Monique

I did that. Oh, how was that? It was very interesting. I got it on a groupon. And it was in Brooklyn. And it was pretty cool. I’m you know, I’m not gonna say I fully tuned out but I kind of did just being able to float in the water and you know, like you could put like different lights if you wanted and then you know music or you go totally black. So I did it totally black. I got scared some time. So I put like the little flashing lights back on twinkle, like make it a little better. But it was interesting.

Mohanad Elshieky  02:12

Yeah, I’ve tried a few times before. I’ve also done it for free. So you know, I would never pay for it. But one of the times I did it was like very early the morning 7AM or something. And the key is to just fall asleep in the tank. And it’s truly so fucking trippy. It’s insane. Like the dreams that you have. Like I dreamt that like I got that a lesser tank and everything and just and so much has happened and then I did not, I was inside the whole time.

Kiki Monique

Wait, you had a little you had a little dickie moment? Do you watch Dave?

Mohanad Elshieky 

I literally did watch that. I was like, oh my god, this is so accurate. Because if you do stay with the tank, you will have like the weirdest fucking dreams ever.

Hoja Lopez 

Oh my god. Well, I can’t wait. You’ve sold me and I will definitely go to groupon for enlightenment. Every time maybe. Hey, everyone, we are so excited. We have Andy Slavitt at our podcast today he is a former White House senior advisor for COVID response under President Biden. Oh my god. And also he’s the host of the podcast IN THE BUBBLE. So we’re basically co-workers.

Kiki Monique 

Much cooler co-workers than I’ve had in the past I will say, at working in Lemonada.

Hoja Lopez

Well, yeah, I’m really excited. We’re gonna go over some awesome stuff. And just really talk about maybe some major apologies that need to happen in the COVID response and talk a little bit about, you know, shaming our fellow unvaccinated Americans and kind of what that leads to.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, I mean, I’m excited to like get some answers from a COVID expert, because I will say, I do read and listen to like podcasts of you know, actual COVID advice, but I also spend a lot of time on TikTok. Some might say too much time. Learning things like what to do in the event of losing your sense of taste and smell. I also learned about this really interesting side effect that some people are saying they get after having COVID called like […], where after they have COVID. everything that they smell like food smells like garbage. It’s sounds like the worst side effect. But again, I’m learning a lot of things on tick tock, which are some glad to have an expert in the house. Just talk about some real COVID stuff.

Mohanad Elshieky  04:37

Well, okay, let’s get into it.

Kiki Monique 

Andy, I’m so glad you’re here. The last time I saw you at least was dinner in LA because we’re sort of neighbors, which makes me feel kind of cool. And we had dinner and we talked about a lot of things, some of it being COVID, which is what we’re going to get into a lot today, but also at the very end of that meal. You got an alert on your phone about that was the night that we found out that Alec Baldwin there was the rush shooting on his set. And I don’t know have you seen the George Stephanopoulos interview he just did?

Andy Slavitt 

No, I didn’t see it.

Kiki Monique 

Okay. Well, I mean, he basically said I didn’t pull the trigger. I don’t feel guilt. I’m just curious.

Andy Slavitt 

What? Like, I didn’t pull the trigger?

Kiki Monique

Yeah, I mean, he claims that he held the cock back. And when it went forward, you know, it led off. So I’m just like, so curious. We did a whole episode, we deep dive. I mean, I know I’m sort of was like, defending him in the beginning. But why does Alec Baldwin make it so hard to love him? And he’s now deleted his Twitter account because of this after this interview.

Andy Slavitt

Oh, man. Well, first of all, that dinner was fun. So like, you and I are friends now, as far as I’m concerned. If you’ll have me. you know, it’s so like, hard for people. And I’m guessing he’s going through a really traumatic time. And, you know, who knows, I mean, maybe he’s in some like, deep. I’m guessing he’s in some, like, really sad state, where he’s like, but they did it. But did it happen. I don’t really remember if it happened. And his publicist probably is not able to control him kind of bleeding out in the public. In this sort of the problem of having too much access to the media. It’s like, Alec, you know, maybe just sit quiet for a few weeks, feel terrible about what happened. You know, you can have this conversation later. But like coming out of definitively saying he didn’t pull the trigger. Like, where’s that kind of lead? I was like, I can’t imagine it’s gonna lead somewhere. So you know, there was a second gunman, right?

Kiki Monique  06:46

The grassy knoll.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Exactly. Yeah, that was never the issue who pulled the trigger, just like a woman died. That’s the problem.

Kiki Monique

Yeah. I’m surprised as lawyers even let him do that. I mean, it’s like an active investigation. But, you know, we’ll see how that turns out. But we also talked, I remember at this dinner, you know, you are, at least to me, and I think to all of us, like the COVID genius, like, you know, all things and like, so of course, like, when we had gone to dinner I had gotten, I was gotten both vaccinations, and I was about to get the booster. And I had been hearing different things. I was like, you know, I got both Pfizer, should I get, you know, the Moderna booster, cuz I heard that, you know, it’s better to cover all the variants. And you were kind of like, well, yeah, I think you should do that in any way. So I actually ended up doing that. But I’m just curious now. I mean, have you seen the movie Mean Girls?

Andy Slavitt 

Yeah. Uh huh.

Kiki Monique 

Okay, so there’s a scene where everyone, you know, at the end was like, have you personally felt victimized by Regina George. And I sort of feel that way, about COVID. Now, because I personally feel victimized by COVID. Because now we have Omicron. Like, I thought I’d be as triple vax. And now we’re going into 2022. And here we are, with a whole new variant. Who is responsible for this, like who, I am at this point, I’m like, I don’t even know. I feel like I want to blame so many people.

Andy Slavitt  08:13

Well, first of all, like Jess calls me America’s COVID Dad, which I think is hilarious, because it sort of is like, it’s another way, it’s a nice way of saying he really doesn’t know anything, but he’s the nice person. Like, this is part of the issue. And I think if you know, it sort of connects to your show in a very interesting way. Because it’s like, what if there’s nobody to blame? It’s like, in many ways, I think nobody’s to blame. And everybody’s to blame. And here’s what I mean by that. This is the virus that basically sending us a message that until you care about your neighbor getting sick, as much as you care about yourself getting sick, or until you care about someone in another continent getting sick. As much as you care about yourself getting sick. This isn’t going away. And like if you could think of a worse puzzle to give to the public, particularly the American public, okay, let’s go away when you start caring about Africa, go, okay. Like, hold your breath.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, good luck with that.

Andy Slavitt 

So at one level, like, I think society is to blame, because we’ve gotten so, our commitment to one another is so thin, not even continent to continent, but, you know, city to city, block to block. And on the other hand, you know, there truly are things that happen that are just, you know, bad things, you know, person versus nature person versus, you know, we read, we read on the books when we were younger, and at some level, like there’s too much probably displaced blame, where, you know, people go through the thinking of saying, this is bad, okay, who’s doing the stupidest thing I could think of, and I’m gonna blame them. I’m gonna blame the anti-mask person will blame the anti vax. And that’s too much responsibility to put on somebody.

Kiki Monique 

Now, when you see that, like, you know, we blame you know, anti-mask person we blame, you know, the anti vaxxers I mean, I know personally, that has led me at least recently in this place where when I see these people who’ve made these proclamations online of like, I’ll never wear a mask or I’ll never get vaccinated, and then they end up dying. I have become this cold-hearted bitch now where I’m just like, see? That’s what you get. And like, it’s led to this thing. Have you heard of the Herman Cain awards?

Andy Slavitt  10:25

I haven’t heard of them. But I can imagine what they are.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, exactly, I mean, it’s exactly what you think it is.

Andy Slavitt 

But I don’t think it ends. Well, I mean, look, we have a society now that is pretty tolerant of people making mistakes. And it’s pretty easy to be judgmental. Like, if you if you read, like, if you didn’t say my name, and read like a description of who I am. To me, I’d be like, I don’t like that I can find something I don’t like about that person. I could find something I don’t like about everybody. But at some level, like, I don’t think it ends. Well. I don’t want to talk about for society. I think for us personally, as human beings, when we just feel like in judgment about so many people, except for the people we know intimately well, because the people we know intimately. Well, we’re like, yeah, no, but judge them based on their intention, not to their actions. And then everybody we don’t know, well, we’re like, no, no, I don’t care what their intentions were, their actions are horrible. And so I would say that one of the byproducts of this pandemic is so many relationships have been frayed. Because we’ve just been like, I ain’t having dinner with that cousin of mine. And it’s like, at some level, we should all be more than one action, or one attitude. And we know this, because we were taught since we were little kids, but in a time of crisis, I think we’re forgetting.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, I mean, I think that we, the funny thing is, is like we all want apologies from both sides, like we want apologies from the people in our lives, who refuse to do the things that we think they need to do the bare minimum, to just get out of this. And they want apologies for saying, like you’re forcing this to get things in our body that we don’t want to do. And it’s like, I can see both sides of it. But at the end of the day, no one’s willing to give. So I mean, at this point, I mean, is this around forever? Are we just going to have COVID in our life for the rest of our life? Because we just won’t adjust?

Andy Slavitt  12:09

Well, there’s sort of two different questions I think you put together here, I’ll try to answer both of them quickly. One of them is like, I found when I was in the White House, the beginning of the year, trying to figure out how what people’s attitudes were towards vaccination. As hard as it was, the more I listened to the better I did. And the more I just sort of said, you know, okay, people are feeling this way. Whatever way they’re feeling 98% of people are floating away for a pretty rational reason. I mean, if someone said to you, like, look, how could you put something in your body that’s only been on the planet for like, a year or two? It’s not an irrational thought. Now, I could say I have a lot of arguments, I could say, well, it’s been on 8 billion arms and, and it’s proven technology, etc, etc. But people saying that we can’t treat them like they’re saying something unreasonable. Or if we do, we’ll never connect with them. So instead, if you say, well, tell me why that concerns you? And what information do you need in order to get yourself comfortable? You can get on a path with most people, not everybody, but with, certainly with most people. The other question you asked us, like, is this going to be around forever? The answer is yes. But don’t worry about it. And what I mean by that is, you know, coronaviruses, like common cold, influence, these things tend to stick around be seasonal, be treatable, and we have a lot of tools. And we’ll have even better tools over time. But I think what goes through your mind when you’re saying this could be around forever is like will April 2020 be around forever? No, that’s not gonna be around forever. But you know, we’ll have an infectious respiratory illness cycle through it from time and again, that we have the ability to protect ourselves against, yes. And people who don’t use the tools to protect themselves will be at much greater risk.

Kiki Monique  14:20

So you were talking about how, you know, you’ve had to do a lot of listening. And it was interesting, because recently, I mean, when this Omicron variant came out, I remember the first thing I heard was, it came from South Africa. And that was what was in my head. And that was what I ran with. And I think everyone around me also assumed, and I think recently, you tweeted, and I’m gonna kind of go to Mohanad on this because you two, you and Muhammad are the only two verified Twitter users on here. But I think you tweeted something about it and someone corrected you and then you, can you explain what happened?

Andy Slavitt

Yep. So the COVID Omicron variant was first discovered in South Africa by a good scientist. but we don’t know that that was where the first case was. The first case could have been in Netherlands, it could have been in Chicago, it could have been. And they could have had poor surveillance systems there. Now, there’s a lot of evidence to suggest that it probably centered in some of in one of the African countries, but no one knows for sure. And people responded on Twitter by saying, in fact, this is dangerous, because it looks like it’s blaming Africa for this issue. And that’s not fair. And that’ll lead to some kind of reactions. And you know, as you step back and think about it, like the way people blamed Asians, for, you know, COVID. And so, of course, I looked at that and said, you know, someone pointed that out, I don’t want my tweet stating out there without addressing it. And so I said, look, this was poorly worded. Thank you for pointing this out. I’m gonna correct it and say it was discovered. We don’t know where the first case is. It’s very important to people’s attitudes towards Africa I think, like on Twitter, because it’s really interesting. Like, I think when people point stuff out, you got two choices, well, you got three choices, you can ignore it. And it’ll go away eventually, you hope, you can fight it, which is kind of when every temptation is no, no, I didn’t mean that. This is what I meant. I was really saying this, and you kind of missed it. But where did you get into this long fight? Or you could say, you know what, that’s a good point. And when you get on Twitter, and you say, Oh, that was a good point. Most people are very forgiving. And they’re very, like, hey, that’s cool. Thank you for saying that. Because that’s not easy to do. I don’t always do that. But when someone points something out, because I tweet a fair amount that says, you know what? I’m not sure that’s right. If I see that tweet, I will come back and say, hey, someone said something. And so I want to make sure that that’s that debate is at least in the open, or if I’m wrong, then I say, you know what, the way I said it was wrong.

Andy Slavitt  16:56

Or there’s a fourth way which Mohanad does, which he just he’ll just delete the tweet entirely.

Andy Slavitt 

You go quick, you gotta go quick if you’ll ever gonna do that.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Oh, yeah, literally, the second someone says anything. You’re like, yep, I’m done here. This point is not worth it.

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah. And my question, I guess was like, do then we owe an apology for the travel bans as well?

Andy Slavitt 

I think that’s conflated. I don’t think those two are related, look, whether a travel ban is a good idea or bad idea, put that aside, whether it’s good policy or bad policy, if you’re gonna put a travel ban out, the reason it’s up is because there’s a hotspot in lots of travel. Now, the reason why it’s people say one reason why people say it’s ineffective is because if people can fly to a third-party point, like they can fly to Finland and then fly in from Finland. You’re like, what’s the point? So it’s sort of like a bucket with a big hole in it. So but look, it’s not, doesn’t need to necessarily be the place of origin. It’s really because there’s a hotspot there. And that’s why they made the decision. Now, there are a lot of contours to that decision, including the people are pointing out as it creates a bad incentive for countries that discover new variants to report them. Because it gives them economic consequence. And so it has to be done very, very, very carefully. I will say, I’ve been part of the debates around those questions. And there’s no buddy I know, except people on Twitter, who that if they weren’t in the room, wouldn’t say, wow, this is a really tough decision with a lot of contours, and people would come up very differently on the answer. But it’s a really legitimate question. If you’ve got an explosive infectious disease in the country to say, should you let people in the country in or should you not? I mean, it’s a legitimate question.

Kiki Monique  18:45

Yeah, I mean, I think that’s my biggest fear. It’s like, if they’re raising the red flag, and then they get, you know, kind of chastised for it or punished for it, then our other country’s gonna be like, well, then I’m just not gonna say anything. And then it just becomes this huge problem.

Andy Slavitt 

You know, what you need we need is like some sort of global treaty, which actually rewards countries for reporting, and sets in place some rules around this is how travel will be done. And that it’ll be to make sure it’s revisited in a very short period of time, and to make sure that some economic resources are put towards it. So if you said, Yes, that’s gonna cause you know, $2 billion of damage to the South African economy, the world countries get together and make a massive investment. And say, because you reported this, and because this is harming your economy, this is what the World Bank is going to do. And I’m not saying that that’s the specific answer, but I’m saying that there is there is a responsibility and accountability. Problem is we don’t have a global infrastructure anymore. The G20 is collapsed. The US and China don’t speak. The UN is more and more toothless. And it’s unfortunate because we are a planet and we just unfortunately can’t govern ourselves like a planet.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Do you think there’s something that I mean, I don’t know, is there something that the government is not doing right now that they should be doing? Whether that like, you know, to get people to get more vaccinated, or, I don’t know, I just feel like what, like we said earlier, like, blaming people individually doesn’t really work. It’s not going to change anything. So there should be like some action taken by the government itself to get people more vaccinated. So let me say, if you were the president, what would you do?

Andy Slavitt  20:28

Okay, so those are two different questions, unfortunately. And this is the dilemma in our country. Like, I’ll tell you what the mayor of New York called me last night and he said, I’m going to roll out a requirement that everybody who works in a private business get vaccinated by the end of the year. A mayor can do that. There’s no question the mayor has the authority to do that. The mayor has already done that for public workers, where the federal government has jurisdiction. And this is where we have very conservative courts and the conservative courts are, and conservatives are suing the federal government, as you probably know, it’s the federal government could say, well, federal employees, because if I’m the president, those people work for me, so I can require them to get vaccinated. Yeah, people who are in hospitals and nursing homes, they all take money from Medicare. So I should have the right to tell them they need to be vaccinated. Now, there’s a lawsuit that stopped that from happening from a Louisiana judge, a conservative judge, there’s an OSHA, which is can make regulations around workplace safety has said, hey, if you’ve got more than 100 people in your workplace, you got to have a rule that says people have to either be tested, or be vaccinated. That’s also been halted by the courts.

Andy Slavitt 

So I think in other countries, Germany is an example right now. But many other countries, you’re able to say, look, this is good for the public welfare, it’s only temporary, we’re going to do this, we’re gonna require this. The US doesn’t have that. So if I were a local leader, I would do absolutely everything I could to say, look, you got four-year old’s who can’t vaccinate themselves, you got people who’ve had kidney transplants, that can’t be protected by a vaccine. Therefore, everybody has to step up and do that federal level. Unfortunately, you can’t really do that. Now are there other areas that that the President could play in one place people point out is domestic travel, could he say, hey, if you’re going to get an airplane, or a train, and go from state to state, it’s interstate travel, and therefore you could regulate it. So that’s a possibility. Again, it probably be subject to legal challenges. By the way, I don’t think he loves the idea of mandates. He would much rather people got there on their own, but he’s pushing about as far as he’s, I think, legally been able to push.

Kiki Monique  22:40

Sorry, I’m having a coffee fit. I don’t have COVID.

Hoja Lopez 

I feel like that’s the main slogan of public coughers.

Andy Slavitt 

I want to get a t-shirt that says I don’t know if COVID.

Kiki Monique 

Yes, I need it on everything.

Andy Slavitt 

And then on the back, you could say just kidding.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah. People see it when it’s too late.

Kiki Monique 

Speaking of I don’t have COVID. I mean, it just came out that Trump before the debate with Biden, he actually had a positive COVID test, I guess he had a positive COVID test, then took another test that was negative, and he sort of ran with that, but in between that time period, he sort of like, you know, met with like, he had a Times reporter who ended up testing positive for COVID. And he met with a bunch of other people. I mean, not that we’ll ever, ever get it but like, doesn’t trump owe all these people that apology too?

Andy Slavitt 

Well, if I recall, he on the debate stage, like literally leave his little holding pin with a plexiglass wall and try to walk over to 79-year-old Joe Biden in like, get near him.

Kiki Monique 

He absolutely did.

Andy Slavitt 

What do you call that? I mean, it’s not attempted murder. Okay, I stopped short of calling an attempted murder. Okay, but it’s somewhere between being a raging fucking asshole and attempted murder. It’s somewhere in the middle of that. Yeah, I don’t know where the middle but if you’re not lucky knew like, it’s not like he was being careless. He knew. I have COVID This is an old dude. I’m gonna go near him as much as I can. And it was really weird at the time. But in terms of prison time, it’s bigger than a white-collar crime. It’s less than murder. I’m saying like seven years. I don’t care if he apologizes I just got seven years in jail for many attempted murder or whatever we want to make something you know, attempted COVID murder, if I’m the jury and I watched the tape. I’d have a hard time voting not guilty.

Kiki Monique  24:32

Agreed. Especially since supposedly, even though he got the negative tests he was told treat everyone as if you are positive and he did the exact opposite of that.

Andy Slavitt 

He has to be just as a human being. There’s like who does that like you have the flu? Like if you’re like you, hey, you got the flu. You like you know, I’m gonna go out to see my friends and fly around get an airplane. Be near people like who does that? I mean, You’re not even putting your life at risk. It’s just like, it’s a social contract that like nobody would think to violate, like, what goes in your head as you’re doing it. You’re like, you know what, hey, I matter. These people don’t matter. I mean, I don’t understand. And as you know, like, his philosophy is never say, I’m sorry, never say you’re sorry. And it works.

Mohanad Elshieky 

It does. It does work.

Kiki Monique 

It’s created like this new version of FOMO. Like, where people are like, the minute they’re told, like, just stay inside like, no, I’m gonna go outside everywhere, even though before they did had no interest in going..

Andy Slavitt

Don’t tell me what’s your taking my freedom. Don’t tell me what to do. This is the totalitarian government, right? I mean, it’s like, but this whole idea of never say you’re sorry. never admit you’re wrong. Like taken to an extreme and it’s kind of going to its extreme. Now. There’s like, 30%-40% of the public who are like, yeah, I’m racist. Jews won’t replace us. Yeah, I’m racist. Yeah, I’ve been oppressed. I’m saying I’m White. You know, White men have been oppressed. I’m gonna say I’ve been feeling it. And I’m gonna say it and I don’t have to say I’m sorry. And you’re like, man, like, no, no, put it back in the box. Like, yeah, I at first, I was like, when Trump first came on the scene, I was like, okay, good. Now, we’re gonna see the racists are and the racist. And the nationalists and all these people, they’re gonna get that let’s expose them, because that’s how we get rid of them. And now a little bit more like, no, no, no, go back to the box. This is unpleasant. I don’t want to see. Hide it. I like I don’t like seeing it everywhere. It makes us all feel like we’re living in a really horrible place.

Kiki Monique  26:43

Just from like, a, you know, I was not in a sorority. So I don’t know a lot about the Greek alphabet. But I see there’s like 24 letters in the Greek alphabet. And Omicron is like number 15. So were there 14 other variants? Cuz I feel like they only heard about like five or six of them?

Andy Slavitt 

Yeah. Well, so yes. And no, I mean, so they skipped new, because they were like, hey, people are gonna walk around going, Hey, new, what’s new? Like, they’re like, it’d be a really bad like, who’s on first joke? They skipped she because that’s the name of the Chinese Premier. And it’s sort of like, that would be really bad. So they’ve skipped a couple. And, you know, I mean, it’s really like, what I wonder when if they were not or run out of the Greek alphabet, like, I just think they start doing like storms? You know?

Kiki Monique 

Where do we go from here?

Andy Slavitt 

Hey, […] Here comes Felix.

Kiki Monique 

I know, right? I remember like wanting hurricanes named after me. But new COVID variants like don’t have the Kiki variant, please.

Andy Slavitt 

I was 1% proud that Hurricane Andrew was kind of a badass hurricane. Like, I know people died. But I was like, you know, at least it wasn’t like, oh, Andrew came and went fast.

Kiki Monique 

So Andy, what is your final message to people you know, about this Omicron variant for the people who maybe like, don’t want to get vaccinated or like don’t know what to do? Like, what would you be your final word to just the general public?

Andy Slavitt  28:12

Final word is this, like, in 2020 when this stuff was going on. There’s like two questions. Do I close the country that I open the country, right? Now we have like seven tools. Let me elaborate. We have vaccines. We have boosters. We have monoclonal antibodies we have coming these oral antivirals, we have masks, we have indoor ventilation, we have rapid tests we have which allow you to understand like a day pass, do I go out? Do I stay home? And more and then we’re gonna have more. So rather than thinking these very binary terms of, do I do nothing. Do I not see my grandmother, do I not go to a concert I liked or not see my friends? Do I not go to school, etc? Or do I, you can actually say, how many of these tools am I using? And am I using them effectively? And by far vaccinated and boosted that sort of like, that sort of more than half the battle. If you don’t do those things, then you can do everything else. And it makes a difference. But you’re missing the biggest one. So I’d say you know, if you haven’t done it, consider it. It’s worth considering. But we should talk about it in ways that people who haven’t been vaccinated, people who aren’t vaccinated are irritated by people who are vaccinated. Kind of […] like, this is the one thing you could do. No, it’s not the one thing it’s not the all seeing all being changed the universe thing it but it’s a big help. So we’ll talk realistically about that. And then, you know, you just believe these other things as you want. But the more you use, first of all, they’re all, they very modest inconvenience on your life. I didn’t know that like wearing a mask is kind of crappy eating outdoors when it’s, you know, when you prefer to eat indoors. It’s not great, you know, etc. But honestly, there’s probably Unless you’re a high-risk person, there’s probably not a lot of things you can’t do if you use these tools, and so embrace them, make them a part of life. And when we have big waves here, we’ll use them. And when waves subside, and there’s very low case, then you don’t need to use them as much.

Kiki Monique  30:19

Well, I love that, and I’m not going to be, I’m still superstitious, I’m not going to say 2022 is going to be our year. But you know, we have tools, so I feel positive about that. Thank you so much, Andy.

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, it’s a pretty compassionate way of looking at it. And I think we got to remember that all the misinformation and all that stuff has been, I think hard on a lot of people. And yeah, looking at it as like a broader part of how America functions right now, instead of this, like, individual need to rebel is probably important to

Andy Slavitt 

Yeah, so like, try to do something time to an anti-vaccine person, you know, and here’s what I would suggest. And I’m kind of serious about this. Is this like tell them, hey, I want to understand your thinking, and then tell them hey, I get you. I hear you. I don’t agree. I don’t disagree with you. I think there’s other ways to look at it. But I appreciate you’re coming from what I learned something about like, that actually opens people up to feeling back connected again, and opens the mind up a little bit. It’s also just a kind thing to do. And I know that like the only reason I do kind of things to for other people is for myself, because it makes me feel good. I don’t really care about the other people. I’m kind because I’m selfish, you get me?

Kiki Monique 

I think most people are.

Mohanad Elshieky 

That will be the quote that we’ll use to advertise this episode. Andy does not care about people.

Andy Slavitt 

Please do not.

Kiki Monique 

Okay, I will remove myself from the Herman Cain subreddit.

Mohanad Elshieky  32:07

Okay, well now it’s time for my favorite segment. Sorry, not sorry, where we either apologize to someone or ask for an apology. Hoja, what’s happening? Who owes you an apology? Who do you want apologize to?

Hoja Lopez 

Okay, so I would like to demand an apology from my facial sweat glands. Because I was in a play this weekend at Annoyance Theater. And within the first five minutes of having well, I didn’t have a lot of clothing on because I’m dressed as like a 90s Christmas mom, you know, so it’s a beaded cardigan on top of a turtleneck above another like, you know.

Kiki Monique  

Like a wool trench?

Hoja Lopez 

Oh, yeah, a wool trench. And then I have very high 90s hair. Sort of a combination of like a sister wife. And then just a downer luck woman at like spa goes in Las Vegas. You know what I mean? And all this to say is that I was sweating so profusely for the first 15 minutes of this play. That it literally looked like this woman who’s supposed to be having a perfectly wonderful Christmas like encounter was actually like trying to escape from someone who just tried to murder her. Like I looked like everything I was saying was so urgent. And then I know that Botox is supposed to help with stuff like that. So I’m gonna look into it, you guys, but I just need a direct apology from the glands just right above the top of my temple. You know?

Kiki Monique 

I will join you in that because the only reason I want Botox is seriously I’m also a face sweater. And like when I was in New York and I was in the subways I would have to carry not just regular like handkerchiefs like washcloths because like amount of sweat just on my face only like nowhere else. Just straight out my face.

Mohanad Elshieky  34:03

The New York subway has its own climate. Like once you’re there, you’re like what’s happening.

Hoja Lopez

And you’re walking in and it’s cold and so you are completely bundled up and then by the time you get in the train, the level of sweltering hotness is horrifying.

Mohanad Elshieky 

It’s like they’re trying to kill you. Like literally yeah, it’s cold hot, very hot and extremely cold again, and I’m just like, what’s happening here?

Hoja Lopez 

That’s a conspiracy theory. That’s it right there.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I mean, it’s not really a theory. It is true. They’re trying to kill us if you’re listening. Yeah, I will not forgive or forget. Speaking of forgiving what’s happening Kiki? What’s happening this week?

Kiki Monique 

You know, originally I was going to demand an apology from the supply chain because I know all of us are sort of like dealing with several issues. One being a major one in my life, which is cream cheese shortage. I mean, specifically in New York, there is a cream cheese shortage. Some of the biggest bagel makers out there have like only days left of cream cheese. And you know how much cream cheese goes on a New York bagel, it’s almost the entire like, you’re looking at just a regular container, like the whole container. And so originally I was going to request an apology from the supply chain, but I was binge watching, I’ve been binge watching Yellowstone which I don’t know if you guys are watching Yellowstone, I very much encourage you to if not, and when I realized how much we are just like taking away from Planet Earth and […] it’s not the supply chain. It’s just us like constantly needing as much stuff as we constantly need. Actually want to give an apology to planet earth. And I encourage Planet Earth to just shed us because you know what, we are an infestation. We’re like I think one of the quotes in Yellowstone was like, we are no longer living with the earth. We are living on the earth. And that’s where we have made our fatal mistake. Because we have no interest in what planet Earth, you know what its needs are.

Mohanad Elshieky  36:09

Exactly yeah, you know Earth do what it is that you need to do. You know, Earth is getting hot, getting rid of toxic people, you know, good for her. Why are we mad?

Hoja Lopez 

Well, she’s unleashed COVID on us. So, you know, she’s really gaining strength to leave us because we’ve been abusing her at home. You know what I mean?

Mohanad Elshieky 

Exactly. Yeah, I mean, get rid of the bad people first, but then, you know, eventually

Hoja Lopez 

We’re like a toxic ex-boyfriend.

Kiki Monique 

Well, you know, the hotter it gets, I like to believe you know, at least the three of us, you know, with our melanated tones will be able to survive a lot more of this, you know, our skins are made for this, like extreme sun. Like what all of these things that may happen so, well the good people may stick around.

Hoja Lopez 

We are chosen.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I mean, if it end up like taking Bezos and like and on Moscow, you know what? I will root for climate change. That is the case. Well, this week. I mean, our listeners at home might notice from my voice is that I got a haircut. I just sound like you know; I have less weight on my head because my head is cold now. But I think I need an apology from my barber is that mad will not shut the fuck up. Literally a second I got into YC I never met this man before. And he asked me to guess what ethnicity he is. And I was just like, I actually rather not do that. Man, I am not gonna do like, you’re not gonna like, you know, quiz me like, what’s this force trivia happening right now? And then this is why he said he said, My dad is Russian and my mom is from Kazakhstan. And I was like, how did you think I was gonna guess that, is there reality or like you’ve asked someone they’re like, Yeah, I know exactly what country this man is a combination of is just Russian and the, you know, Kazakhstan. I’m just like, bro, just leave me alone. And then he will just not stop telling me like COVID conspiracy theories. He was like I am like; I have two shots and I boosted but let me tell you. They’re trying to control us. And I’m just letting them know like, this is actually the best thing I’ve ever heard.

Kiki Monique  38:31

Did you like do the trick where you put your headphones in to try to like give them a hint. Like you weren’t interested in this convo?

Mohanad Elshieky

You know what, actually, I didn’t have to do any of that the owner eventually like God had and he was just like, literally just said, out of nowhere. I just heard them and say, please stop. Because apparently, this is something he just keeps doing with every customer. He was like, please stop. But just please, please stop. Right, stop right here. And he was like, okay, man. Okay. And I was like, okay, thank God because I can’t take the shit.

Hoja Lopez 

His work Dad was like, Tommy, you got to stop bullying the Little Kids Next Door. You got to stop talking about your crazy stuff. That’s so funny.

Kiki Monique 

I miss hair salons like ever since COVID. Pretty much like when I get my hair done like take one person at a time. So there’s no banter other than with like the person and like, I just like I like what happens in the environment of barber shops and hair salons just like, but yeah, when they just like when it’s just you and them and they just want to like breath you it’s just like can I just like, you know, binge watch bravo on my phone, please? I don’t want to do this.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Exactly, I feel like I should be able to watch something do so also I feel like there should be a choice of like, do you want me to have a conversation with you or not? Like maybe because like, if you think you need to talk to me in order for me to tip or something? Then you don’t need to? I’ll tip you as long as you don’t fucking stab me in the head.

Kiki Monique 

Maybe that’s how you enter the conversation. The less you talk to me, the higher the tip.

Mohanad Elshieky  40:03

Exactly, yeah.

Hoja Lopez 

God what a baller move is to walk in and say that to a stylist. I don’t speak in 99.9% of lifts or Ubers. Or I just know, I don’t say anything.

Kiki Monique 

I love when they have that option where it says like, do you want a quiet ride? I’m always like, absolutely.

Mohanad Elshieky 

It’s funny because like, Rosie loves, I mean, she talks to, you know, like Uber drivers and stuff like that, which is good because she could carry the conversation when we’re together. Which is nice. But now we have a rule when I’m like, Rosie, if you tell the driver, I’m a comedian. I’m gonna get out.

Hoja Lopez 

Being revealed as a comedian.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I had a driver once. Literally, like it was like a 20-minute ride. He pitched me three jokes that were very long. The funny thing is like, he would like to get done and he was like, What do you think? I was like, oh, what are you done? Oh, sorry. I was like, I literally that was the punch line. And I’m just like, bro, just please leave me, have no power to make you anything really. So go to an open mic. Like I paid you and I have to listen to this. That’s just too much.

CREDITS

I’M SORRY is a Lemonada Media Original. The show is produced by Alex McOwen, supervising producer is Kryssy Pease. Our executive producers are Stephanie Wittels Wachs and Jessica Cordova Kramer. Our mix is by Kat Yore and theme music was composed by Xander Singh. If you like this show, please rate and review. And please don’t cancel us. You can find out more about our show at @LemonadaMedia on all social platforms, or follow us on Instagram at @imsorry_podcast. We’ll be back next week and until then be nice, play fair and always say I’m sorry. Thanks for listening!