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Comedian Heather McMahan joins Sam to talk about how she’s what you would get if Joan Rivers and Conan O’Brien had a baby, why she chose to self-produce her comedy special Breadwinner and the importance of being your own yes-man. They also talk about the joys of the human body, like ovarian cysts bursting on transatlantic flights, if there’s anything she doesn’t think her audience wants her to joke about (there isn’t), and why everyone is getting Plan B in their Christmas stockings this year. Plus, Heather talks about her red carpet coverage and living in the Deep South.

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Transcript

SPEAKERS

Heather McMahan, Samantha Bee

Samantha Bee  00:00

For a party that is willing to let women die rather than terminate a pregnancy, Republicans sure have some mixed messaging to figure out when it comes to letting Americans start families through IVF. IVF, if Donald Trump or any Republican Congressman are listening, stands for in vitro fertilization, and it is an incredibly common way to help couples conceive by fertilizing eggs outside the body and replanting them back in after it helps couples create families that can’t otherwise, whether it’s a same sex couple, a person that wants to be a single parent, or a couple that desperately wants children but can’t get pregnant in any other way, it’s a miracle. It’s also incredibly expensive and an incredibly hard process to put your body through, but if you want to start a family, sometimes it is one of the only ways, which is why I have some serious choice words for Republicans who have made it a political issue, and I’ve made it clear that because sometimes embryos are discarded during the IVF process. The Pro family party doesn’t really want you to create a family this way. Just this past September, Republicans in Congress voted against a bill that would guarantee the right to IVF because I don’t know man, of course they did. So once again, falls on women to tell they’re honest and sometimes and often painful stories to try to get politicians to give a damn figure out your messaging you asshats, either you’re pro family or you are not.

 

Samantha Bee  02:46

This is Choice Words. I’m Samantha Bee. My guest today is comedian Heather McMahan. In a time of darkness, this southern girl is such an incredibly bright and totally hilarious light. I needed the joy. I needed the joy she brought even when talking and laughing about going through IVF in the south. And I think that you need it too. So take a listen and make good choices.

 

Samantha Bee  03:20

Okay, we’ve never met before. We haven’t.

 

Heather McMahan  03:23

No.

 

Samantha Bee  03:23

Never met before. And I just, I need to say, like, right out of the gate, that I it’s like, kind of like a doom and gloom with the world is not what everyone was hoping and etc. So I have been so excited that I get to talk to you, because you’re like a beacon of light in a very dark world.

 

Heather McMahan  03:49

I mean, listen, I’m trying to keep the giggles going. It’s also wild being like a a woman from the south, living in the South right now too, because I am just holding on for dear life.

 

Samantha Bee  04:05

I bet you are. Oh boy, we will have fun today. I promise we will put that. We will take the world and share that and to cupboard.

 

Heather McMahan  04:17

I love that. That will what I do with so many of my feelings. I bury it so deep till I have some sort of intense IBS, and then I never deal with the problems.

 

Samantha Bee  04:26

No, and it just will. It calcifies into, like, a horrifying like, just, oh, it just gets bigger, and whatever.

 

Heather McMahan  04:36

It turns into an ovarian cyst. That’s what happens. It always it’s like, every three years, they’re like, Yeah, you have an enormous ovarian cyst. It’s ready to rupture. I’m like, it’s all the built. It’s just the the oppressed feelings you know.

 

Samantha Bee  04:50

Can I tell you something that’s so funny, because I went to my doctor two years ago or a year ago, and she was like, wow, you have the biggest uterine polyp. I think. I’ve ever seen, like, she was like, it’s like, the size of, it’s like the size of an alien face hugger from the Alien franchise. Like, just like, I feel like she, when she took it out, she had to, like, throw it into the forest, and it tried to run back in to the room, like it had a life. You know what? I mean? I was like, yeah. I was like, that’s that is called. That polyp has been growing since Donald Trump became president of waterstein.

 

Heather McMahan  05:23

100% now, could you feel it? Were you in pain?

 

Samantha Bee  05:26

No, not at all okay.

 

Heather McMahan  05:28

So then that’s then you got the good one. Because I had the good one. I had an ovarian cyst rupture on an airplane, on an international flight. Yes, I was flying from New York to London, and I hadn’t been feeling well the whole day, and I knew I had a cyst. But, you know, as a woman, we just live with shit, and we live in pain, and we deal with it totally. And then we took off, and it was like, an hour and a half into the flight, and it hit me. I, like, kind of woke up, and I was like, oh my god, I think my appendix is rupturing. Turns out the cyst was so big it had created an ovarian torsion, so my ovaries flipped upside down. They say it’s comparable to, like, the largest kidney stone childbirth, like I thought I was dying, so they had to call for a medical professional on the flight. And of course, I’m mortified. I’m apologizing to everyone, and I wouldn’t be the flight attendant. I was just like, Hi, I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to burden you, but I think I’m having a medical emergency.

 

06:18

I think it’s, excuse me, ma’am, I’m possibly dying. Yes, there. Can you just do the call, see if there’s a doctor?

 

Heather McMahan  06:28

Yeah, oh, it was bad. So then they finally, like, called down to, I was on a Virgin Atlantic. They called down to, like, a doctor on Earth, and they’re like, Hi, can we give this woman, like, sedatives, like, can we put her out? And they gave me something at a nurse on the flight kept being like, you have a baby stuck in your fallopian tube. She just kept saying that over and over again because she thought I had an ectopic pregnancy. I was like, ma’am, I think this is an ovarian cyst. Sure enough, as soon as I get to the hospital in London, they’re like, this is the largest cyst we’ve ever seen.

 

Samantha Bee  06:58

I love that. They always compare it to fruit. Also, they’re like, grapefruit, tangerine, Clementine.

 

Heather McMahan  07:06

Mine was, yeah, mine was like a hard, like a granny smith apple.

 

Samantha Bee  07:10

That’s great, that’s a wonderful and just walking around with that, just all walking around, it’s just fine, riddled, riddled with all sorts of shit that’s fantastic. Well, I think it’s gonna, the world’s gonna get a lot better in the next little while. I wouldn’t worry about it.

 

Heather McMahan  07:30

I know I how can you worry about it? You know what the good thing is, though, I I went to, it’s because I live in Georgia. I Publix is like our big grocery store here. So I went to Publix pharmacy, and I walked in, and they had so aggressively pushed all the emergency contraceptives to the front of the pharmacy, and I got, like, my Pub Sub because pub exposure store is famous for their like, sub sandwiches, so I have my my buffalo chicken wrap, and then I’m like, getting 15 Plan B’s and picking up my birth control. And the lady the pharmacist there was just, like, everyone’s been in today. Like, get your get your shit while you can.

 

Samantha Bee  08:03

Like, if we’re talking about stocking stuffers this year, we’re talking about Plan B, put a little bow on that shit and it goes in right in the stocking for the people you love.

 

Heather McMahan  08:12

100% I’m going to Mississippi this weekend because I’m, I know why. I went to the University of Mississippi. Very proud that that’s my alma mater. But I already emailed, like, the head of the my old sorority, and I was like, Who needs goods? I’m bringing them?

 

Samantha Bee  08:25

Oh, my God, it’s like, how we used to, like, I’m for originally from Canada, and we’re always like, there was a lot of, there’s like, a big travel corridor between Canada and Cuba, right? The party parts of Cuba, you know? And when people would go to Cuba, they were like, we always bring one suitcase for our stuff and one suitcase full of necessities for the women of Cuba, including those legs pantyhose that came in the little plastic egg. Because everybody loves them.

 

Heather McMahan  08:52

Who doesn’t love I miss an old pantyhose. I miss them.

 

Samantha Bee  08:55

Oh, I miss a legs. We would make at my Catholic school, we made little Christmas angels out of those legs, eggs. Simpler times simpler, simpler times. It’s fine. RFK Jr is going to be in charge of your healthcare now, and he really understands women. He gets it.

 

Heather McMahan  09:13

He fully gets it. I, I don’t have words anymore. And, you know, it’s it’s wild too. Because being, you know, a public figure. And being a comedian, I’ve been very outward and and positive. I never respond to Trump supporters in a, like, a malicious way. But man being on the other receiving end of that is what nightmares are made out of.

 

Samantha Bee  09:35

It is what nightmares are made of. And you actually like have to be. I mean, how do you because it is different, and it is actually like, I don’t know if you felt it immediately upon his winning, but I think it is almost instantaneous that if you’re an outspoken person, your social media just fills up with, yeah, hatred on a level that most people could not endure.

 

Heather McMahan  10:01

Yeah, it is really wild. And I by no means. I’m like, Oh, I’m a victim. I can’t handle it because I’m in comedy. I mean, I deal with this shit all the time. But I posted a very specific clip from my last special about the day that I got married. I found out right before I walked down the aisle, there was the announcement about Roe versus Wade, and I just posted it because I’m like, this could not be a better day to post it. And I am just sitting back and watching the arguments in the comments, and I’m just like, I will let that world destroy itself. I’m not even going to touch it. I am sitting here with my organic Pinot Noir and a Smith pulse cigarette, and I don’t give a fuck anymore.

 

Samantha Bee  10:35

Have at it. Tear it apart. Share another clip, and I don’t give a shake.

 

Heather McMahan  10:42

Don’t care. I don’t care. And then on the other end, like, my agent’s calling me, he’s like, so we’re putting up a new tour dates. And I’m like, great, give it a week.

 

Samantha Bee  10:50

Let it dress. Just tiny bit of chill would be great. Would be great. Yeah? It’s like, you kind of want to give, like, a respectful distance between something horrifying happening in the world? Yeah, and announcing a fun new tour, exactly.

 

Heather McMahan  11:04

Yeah.

 

Samantha Bee  11:04

Just a bit, just a bit, just a smidge, tiny bit. Are you coming to New York? Because I am a buyer tickets to come and see

 

Heather McMahan  11:11

Girl, I will give you tickets. I am coming to play the Beacon Theater sometime in May. Yes, so it’ll be so much fun, and, you know, so fun. It’s weird too, because when I my hour came, my special came out in like, middle of October, and then I started warming up a new hour, but it was pre election, and I never, my humor has never been, you know, based and rooted in politics. But now I’m like, I’ve got to change my whole hour, because if you’re a woman and you’re not talking about this stuff, what are we doing? You know.

 

Samantha Bee  11:40

Listen, I love your comedy.

 

Heather McMahan  11:42

I think they’re you. You’re so kind.

 

Samantha Bee  11:44

I think you’re fantastic. I think your Instagram is a bright light and a beacon in this world. And I think that people who listen to this podcast, if they don’t know who you are, they should know who you are. It’s just a huge just a star, and it is such a pleasure to watch your ascent. Like to to be able to watch it. It’s like a gift. It’s a gift we could all give ourselves. Okay? So one thing that I do always ask people on this podcast is, because it is really called choice words. So we talk about, like a big choice, like a big swing. You know that a person takes that maybe puts them on a trajectory that they might not have expected, or puts you exactly squarely where you need it to be. Can you when you reflect on your life, are you good? Are you good at making choices? Big Choices, big swings.

 

Heather McMahan  12:34

You know, it’s wild. I never thought I was making big choices. I’ve just been in like, a fight or flight mode for the last, like, eight years. And then I now, when I look back, I’m like, No, I did make all these big choices. I, you know, I self produced both of my specials and then took them out to market, which at the time, you know, it’s definitely a new model. But a lot of women in comedy, a lot of just comedians in general, are doing it. And I basically always said in my career, I never wanted to wait around for somebody else. I mean, you know, you come from the television world. Developing television is a is an absolute freaking nightmare. And with stand up, it was always like, if I could put asses in seats, if I could build it, they would come. And that’s what’s so refreshing about stand up, is like, tomorrow I can just go do a show. It’s not the waiting for somebody else to give you a yes. So I always just dove in head first. I didn’t always know if it was gonna work, and then it worked. And so I don’t give myself enough credit. And after this last special came out, I was like, it does you’re, you know, when you’re a touring comic, you’re just constantly on the road and you’re going, you’re grinding, you’re only as good as your last gig or your last show or the last comment on Instagram. So it makes you a little nuts. And it took me a second, like, a week after I was on this big press tour, to sit back and go, Oh my God, we did this, you know, like, it’s crazy.

 

Samantha Bee  13:53

Yeah, you have really created something. And I do think that, like, if you’re not, I just 100% agree with you, television development is just like, it’s like, you are always waiting for someone to go. I believe in you, yeah. Like, I think you can make money for my company, exactly. And that’s really it. Actually, it’s not even I like you. Like, who gives a shit if anyone likes you? It’s like, can you make money for our company? And why? and then only, and then please only do that one thing ever and continue to make money for this company, or it’s fucking over in one in a hot second.

 

Heather McMahan  14:31

Yeah, it’s wild, too. When you go into like, some of these development meetings and, you know, your team pulls, like, your stats, and they’re like, you know, as, like, a selling card, they’re like, just so, you know, I never forget I had an agent that was like, Heather’s audience. Like 80% of the women who come to shows have American Express, Platinums and everyone’s like, hey.

 

Samantha Bee  14:48

Oh my god. I intended it for it to be that way. That was my goal all along. Amex customers,

 

Heather McMahan  14:56

Yeah, I’m like, how did you even pull that information? I mean, Go, girls. But. Like, I I want no part of this. You know, I’m just here to make people laugh.

 

Samantha Bee  15:03

And ultimately, also, like, in kind of conventional television terms, you really are always at the mercy of companies that you don’t have any relationship to. Never want to. They’re like, PF Changs is really unhappy with the suggested joke in your script. Can we remove it? Because it’s such a gift. It’s such an incredible accomplishment to be so clear about what you want it to look like to create that world for yourself. And it requires people to want to come and see you right and that, and they do, and you just keep moving forward, and then that leads to, like, other opportunities along the way. But you have this core.

 

Heather McMahan  15:44

Yes, I had this core. And you know, coming up in comedy as well. I didn’t have like, a real traditional trajectory. I was in LA, I was doing improv. I had been in New York before that, doing improv and sketch, and I’d always come from a stand up background, and then so I had the stand up roots, but I was kind of going more towards I want to do sketch comedy. I wanted to do SNL. I wear wigs. I like to do characters. And, you know, I want to, I want to play a character who’s got like, a crunchy, fried blonde wig on, and she smokes Menthols and drives a Mazda Miata, like, that’s the core of who I am, and my my humor. And then I got back to stand up, because I’d had this, like, life altering moment. My dad had died, and I was back in Atlanta, and I was feeling Woe is me. And I was like, I have to get up and do stand up just to work through, like, process what I’m going through. And then it just kind of took off. It was wild. I didn’t realize that this huge shift in my life, you know, this devastating moment, would guide me back to where I was actually supposed to be, which was, you know, on a stage telling jokes.

 

Samantha Bee  16:42

We’ll be right back after this.

 

Samantha Bee  18:40

It’s actually amazing. Like when you do tap into like, you know, people are looking for an authentic experience of almost anything, and so when they’ve. Feel because you’re so you’re so open about your jokes are hilarious, but they’re built on a foundation of truth, and your personality shines very authentically in your performance. So, like, people can sniff out something inauthentic and like, a hot second and they don’t want it, but if they can, like, come to your show, or you just talk about grief and fertility treatments and your marriage and all this stuff in such, like, a grounded way. It’s really, it’s, like, helpful to people, and it’s catharsis for people. Is there anything that you would want to make jokes about that you can think of that you don’t think your audience would go there with you at this point.

 

Heather McMahan  20:38

You know, the shows are pretty wild, and I’ve kind of really become comfortable, like letting it rip and talking about everything. I was surprised when I started touring with the IVF material how many women responded to me. They’re like, they were all going through it. I mean, I would take a poll of my shows, and it was something like 30% of the people in the audience were like, I’m doing this now and again. You don’t know until you’re actually going through it. And I also didn’t realize that so many other people hadn’t really talked about it specifically. And I mean, there’s really, for me, there’s nothing off topic. But I’m always shocked and a little surprised when I do start talking about certain things and I’m like, wow, we really are all in this together, truly.

 

Samantha Bee  21:18

So we’re taught in your first this is from your first special the son I never had. You talk about IVF, the crazy effects of doing, of having to go on testosterone, maybe not, all of the medications mix, doing the medications wrong, mixing together $20,000 worth of fertility medications in a big trying to batch, cook it.

 

Heather McMahan  21:39

Yeah I mean, I thought I was doing meal prep, and that’s the wild thing too. When you go through IVF, no one tells you what you’re prepared for. I had had multiple girlfriends that did it that were like, oh, buckle up. But nobody sat me down and said, You need to go on YouTube and get a minor in Chemistry. You need. I mean, it was insane, the how unprepared I was for that.

 

Samantha Bee  22:00

I want to say this is so deeply a woman’s condition, is that no one really tells us anything very specific about any one thing. It’s incredible. It’s fucking incredible to me.

 

Heather McMahan  22:16

The lack of details at a Bunko group, I’m like, women, we get together. You have your book clubs, you do Bunco, your cards, whatever you’re doing. Why are we not sharing? All we do is sit around a bullshit why has no one told me specific details about what I’m about to sign up for.

 

Samantha Bee  22:31

100% why isn’t there someone in the Bunko group who’s like, can I talk to you for 10 minutes? And I’m not sure. I’m almost like, you know, it’s not like, if you tell us hard things, we’re gonna go, oh, then in that case, I’ll skip it, like, we’re gonna do it anyway, exactly anyway. Go in with, like, just a touch, just like, a touch of information. Yeah, it sounds it feels unfair. I’ve been doing, I did a show about perimenopause, about menopause, and it’s the same thing. I’m like, it’s just a room full of people, and I’m just saying things that happened, and everyone and everyone’s like, and I’m like, Why didn’t anybody ever just talk about it out loud for one fucking second? No shit, I wouldn’t have thought I was crazy.

 

Heather McMahan  23:14

Well, and the two years I realized, when I was doing the IVF and I was going to all these doctors visits, and I would sit in the waiting room with 50 other women getting their blood drawn. And you know, I’m in Atlanta, so a lot of gals know me, and we’re all chit chatting. And I finally sat there one day, you see these husbands too that are coming in to drop off their little sperm samples, or they’re getting their blood drawn, and they all look like, Oh God, I’m trying, trying to be cool, or like, low key. And I literally yelled out one day. I was just like, no one cares that you’re here, all right, you just drop off your semen and walk away.

 

Samantha Bee  23:46

We are all here for the same thing.

 

Heather McMahan  23:48

Yes, okay, no one is finding you hot and horny. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. Just drop off your load and get out of here. We don’t have time.

 

Samantha Bee  23:55

No, what’s in the bag, sir, it’s not a secret, you don’t think you’re here picking up $10,000.

 

Heather McMahan  24:02

It was unbelievable. And I sit in this waiting room, and I became friends with so many women who are, like, on the same cycle as me or, you know, and we, yeah, we’re all sitting there at like, this village together. And I’m like, we knew nothing coming into this. So I knew for that first special I was like, I have to break down even for my own sanity to be like, how did I fuck this up?

 

Samantha Bee  24:24

Oh, my God. I think it is so funny that you talk about the suppositories, like all the vaginal suppositories and and having one burst out, just burst.

 

Heather McMahan  24:36

Just burst. And that is the rawest feeling you will ever feel. And you know, and again, as women, we’re trying to do the most. So I’m on tour doing IVF. I’m at the airport, and I, again, think some fans coming up to me, and she’s like, Yeah, it looks like mayonnaise exploded on your crotch. And I’m like, that’s the two vaginal suppositories that absolutely popped in my pussy. That’s where I’m at.

 

Samantha Bee  24:56

Absolutely popped. And now I’m rinsing out my under. Wear in this toilet, and, you know, and women are coming in and they’re repelled by it, and you’re like, well, good. I hope you’ve had such a nice life that you never experienced this. You’re very lucky. Wow, you must be the luckiest person in the world.

 

Heather McMahan  25:16

Yeah, it was a journey, and I know I’ll have to do it again. And that’s also why I’ve been, like, emotionally a mess this week, as a lot of women are, it’s like, I know I have to do another round, but one after doing three rounds and only getting one embryo, grateful for the one embryo, but I’m like, I don’t know if I can physically muster that again, right?

 

Samantha Bee  25:35

Yeah, it’s a lot.

 

Heather McMahan  25:36

Yes, it’s a lot.

 

Samantha Bee  25:37

And to the indignities, the stress of it. It’s, it is a lot when you’re working in a new hour, how often are you doing it?

 

Heather McMahan  25:45

You know, I, the way I kind of roll is, I’m an old theater kid, so I like to, like, write the play. I will lock myself in my my office, in my basement, for like a week, and storyboard everything. And I have an idea. I’ve been working on jokes, like popping in here and there, but then I basically go and I let it rip for like, you know, a month in clubs, and I just, it’s not like I’m getting up because I’m in Atlanta. I mean, you know, I can pop in places, but I really kind of have the storyboard in my mind. And then I’ll get up and I’ll just do clubs for like, a month or two, and then I be in a completely different show by the time I take it out to theaters. Yeah, I’m not necessarily just popping in and doing 10 minutes here. In 10 minutes here. It that that process for me, it doesn’t really I can go in and rework some old jokes or rework some other things, but I have to have already performed the whole hour in order for my brain to, like, be able to work it out into like, 12-10 minute segments. I know that doesn’t make sense for a lot of comics, but that’s just kind of like my writing process.

 

Samantha Bee  26:45

And do you record yourself? Oh yeah, watch it after. Oh you. Do you record yourself? Yeah? Listen to it after. You watch it after.

 

Heather McMahan  26:51

Oh yeah, I watch all the game tape you do. And I’m like, a real, physical performer. I’m across the stage. I’m not a stand like one liner jokes. I’m telling stories. I’m is I’m very physical, so for me, I have to kind of be in my bones in for the whole show. I mean, it’s insane. People are like, how did you just write a new hour? I’m like, I just do. I just don’t know. You know, a lot of it will get cut and I’ll rework things. But that’s just my old theater brain. That’s how I roll.

 

Samantha Bee  27:20

The stand up world is pretty unfamiliar to me. It’s not something that I that I do, but there’s a lot. There’s always, like, a lot of talking about it. There’s always, like, a lot of talk and process. Are you a part of those conversations? Are you like, this is my process. It’s totally different from most. I don’t know.

 

Heather McMahan  27:36

Yeah, I mean, we all kind of, you know, I’m friends with a bunch of comics, and we all talk about it, but I’m kind of the Lone Ranger. I mean, I moved to Atlanta. I my husband, I were living in New York City, and then the pandemic happened. We moved back to Atlanta. I’ve been on the road for the last like, four or five years, so I kind of am in an interesting place where I dip into LA, I go do stuff. I’ll do show. I’ll pop in, and then I get to leave. I’ll dip into New York, and then I get to leave. So I kind of the best way for me to to to get material is to go up to my country club and go play bridge with a bunch of 75 year old Republicans. That’s how I get my material. Is like living a normal life, and then I get to pop back into those scenes, you know.

 

Samantha Bee  28:18

That’s really helpful, like a theater kind of thinking of it, because it is a complete like, watching your special is a complete entertainment because you are so physical. And it does feel like, here’s the beginning, it’s a beginning, middle, end, and it’s very storytelling.

 

Heather McMahan  28:33

Yeah, that is the theater. I would feel more comfortable at the Beacon than I will in a club, just because I am like, this is prepared, and it’s everything from the curated playlist. When you walk in, I want you to know that you have a very, it’s a very specific vibe and for each tour, and that’s what’s fun. And now building this new tour, I’m like, Okay, here we go. What are we doing? But I’ll figure it out.

 

Samantha Bee  28:56

Do you have, like, do are you like, Okay, this is my lighting design that I love, yeah, because it’s a visual package, too.

 

Heather McMahan  29:04

Oh, for sure. I mean, and my big thing is I, I pay a lot of homage to Joan Rivers, like, I love the glamor that she always brought to comedy. So for me, right now, I’m designing my costumes like, I’m not a gonna get up in a T shirt and jeans. That’s just not my game day outfit, if you will. I like to feel like when I am backstage. I’m about to, I’m about to step on stage, on that theater. I either have my glitter jacket on or I have on a fabulous dress. It just makes me feel prepared to go to battle. So that’s also a part of it, too battle armor.

 

Samantha Bee  29:39

Battle armor. I really do feel like we don’t, we don’t talk about Joan Rivers enough. We don’t have enough credit.

 

Heather McMahan  29:48

I loved her. She was I used to go to all of her shows when I was living in New York, back in like 2009 and I would go see her play even these small clubs. I mean, she was in her early 80s, and she’s running around and I went up to her one one night after Shauna just said, Miss rivers, I need you to know you’re one of the reasons why I got into comedy. I adore you. She said, I really like your energy. I like your style, your voice. She said, I think you need to go to LA. So I moved to LA two years later, I run into her at dinner one night, I go up to her at their table, Miss rivers, I don’t want to bother you. I just want you to know I took her advice. I moved to LA and she was like, good for you. I sit down. I’m finishing my meal. I’m like, I didn’t want to bother her, but I’m so glad. I said hi. She came up to me afterwards. She said, You have chutzpah. I am not worried about you. You have a smart business mind, and you’re going to make it keep going. And then she died, like, two weeks later, yeah, and I got to meet her daughter, Melissa, and I adore her, but I’ll tell you I had no money. And when she passed, all I wanted was to buy one of her she had these Tiffany silver dog bowls that were on her that she was selling through Christie’s with her estate sale. And I didn’t have a plot to piston at the time, so I didn’t get them. But my husband knows, like, I’m like, I have money now. All I want are these dog bowls from Joan Rivers, and I can’t find them anywhere.

 

31:05

Oh no, I’m gonna, I’m writing […]

 

Heather McMahan  31:11

The dog bowl. Send me the label.

 

Samantha Bee  31:13

I’m gonna, if I find those goddamn dog bowls, I know, oh boy, I need them. I loved that documentary about her that was like, where she opens all the little drawers with her cue cards, with her jokes, like, what a prolific artist.

 

Heather McMahan  31:30

And just was so over the top and insane. And I loved her, and she said all the things that we felt and were, yeah, but wasn’t afraid to say it. I mean, she was such a pioneer in comedy period, much less being a woman. I just adored her. And I love to, I mean, I saw one of her shows right before she passed. I mean, she was just, it was a 90 minute show. She’s running across the stage. She’s got a giant cape on, like a feather boa. And I’m like, this bitch knows how to entertain, you know.

 

Samantha Bee  32:00

Boy, she was like, she was delta, the hand of sexism. Like, on the next level, like, just, just shut out, shut out. Of a lot of conversations, just like, shut out, people were like, I’m not into her. I don’t know why. I just don’t like her. The big comics of the time. Anyway, I loved her too. Like, when people are like, Well, how did you know? Like, I’m sure you get asked this a lot. Like, people are like, how did you know that you could be in comedy? And you’re like, because Joan Rivers existed. Like, why would you have not thought you could do it period?

 

Heather McMahan  32:34

Like, Joan did it. We can all do it. I always, you know, I’ll be in meetings, and they’re like, so tell us about your style of comedy. I’m like, basically, I’m if Joan Rivers and Conan O’Brien had a baby, I think there you go, a little goofy, like Conan and a lot of just Sass and like, you have no idea what’s going on, like Joan Rivers. And that’s, yes, that’s my style.

 

Samantha Bee  32:57

Do you okay? So the new, your new comedy specialist, called bread winner. It’s on Hulu, and I think it talks, you talk in such a fresh way about women who are the breadwinners in their family. It’s like a very fraught conversation. And I actually think, or it can be a very fraught conversation. It’s like a hard conversation that I’m not entirely sure society is really ready to be having in a serious way?

 

Samantha Bee  33:23

But you flip it in such a an entertaining way, because, like, I it was like, actually an unexpected direction that your husband is, like, yeah, be the breadwinner. I want to golf.

 

Heather McMahan  33:23

I agree.

 

Heather McMahan  33:38

Oh, he’s, I can hear him upstairs in our guest bedroom that’s above my office. He’s listening to some, like, Barstool Sports golf podcast right now. You know? Well, it was funny because, you know, it’s very interesting. It’s been a little polarizing. I’m like, here I am. It’s like standing in my success, doing the damn thing. But I’m also, I’m also making jokes on myself. How, like, I do think it’s like, a little bit destroyed our comfort as women. I’m like, why am I working this hard so Jeff can join a second country club Now, granted, he took care of me for so long when I was like, climbing, you know, and just like scratching the surface as a comic. So I love that he gets his like, mini retirement right now. But there are days where I come home from the office. I’ve done podcasts, I’ve written new stuff I’m doing press all this, and I’m just like, oh, tough day on the course.

 

Samantha Bee  34:26

Right oh, you must be exhausted.

 

Heather McMahan  34:28

Oh, you have to go to physical therapy for your golf game.

 

Samantha Bee  34:32

I hate you.

 

Heather McMahan  34:33

Yeah.

 

Samantha Bee  34:34

It is also very like, it’s totally refreshing. It just doesn’t happen very often that people talk about their happy marriage where they like it’s so clear that you are in love and you’ve been to love him for, it’s very clear, it’s nice.

 

Heather McMahan  34:51

I do love him. And it was so interesting when I started doing press for this tour or for this special number one question everyone asked me, how did your. Husband feel about you talking about making more money than him? How does your husband feel about you talking about these things in your marriage? And my first response was, nobody asked me men this. Nobody asked her Bill Burr, what what his wife thinks when he’s Oh no, ripping her, you know, ripping jokes on her. Nobody asked any of these guys. Like, what are we talking about here? So all of a sudden it’s like, oh, wow, she’s really saying the things that women feel and think, I’m like, Yes, that’s my job. I’m a woman, you know?

 

Samantha Bee  35:27

Oh yeah, that’s different. Damn, yeah, you Oh, you are doing red carpet coverage too. You’re so good at I mean, in the Joan Rivers tradition.

 

Heather McMahan  35:39

It is very full circle for me. When I was asked to do it, I immediately was like, Yeah, sure, I’ll get into it. And now I’m really getting more comfortable. Because for me, I’m not a journalist, I’m a comic. So I really wanted to come in hard with the roast in honor of Joan, but I realized, because I was a new kid in town, I have to ease my way into really digging at these celebs, you know, I have to.

 

Samantha Bee  36:02

Oh, I see what you’re saying.

 

Heather McMahan  36:04

I’m warming up the Golden Globes though, I think I’m just gonna let it rip, because now I’m really, I know what I’m doing, but it is, that is one of the hardest gigs I’ve ever done. You have a producer talking in your ear. You’re standing on your platform. You have to try and grab these interviews. You have, you know, every, every celebrity who’s walking the right carpet, their publicist is talking to the E News publicist, so people are chatting around you. You get 30 seconds, and then a publicist might come up, grab your card, be like, don’t ask any of these questions. No journalism background. I’m studying my ass off. I did too many drugs in college, so the retention is not where it used to be, and it is a tough gig. You’re live on television for like, three hours, right?

 

Samantha Bee  36:43

And I think it’s also dreadful when they’re like, can you just go on just like, Vamp a bit? Yeah, keep talking. Yeah, there’s like, gotta fill four minutes. Because why did I think of the name Herve villagers? He’s not alive anymore. I’m like, they’re like, Hervey villages is coming. Like, he’s been gone for like, decades. Like, okay, Jessica Chastain is not she’s not going to talk to you. She’s like, going past so you got to talk until the next commercial break. Just start talking about trains on dresses, and you’re like, what?

 

Heather McMahan  37:14

Yeah, oh, what. It’s one of the hardest gigs.

 

Samantha Bee  37:19

It’s interesting to talk about people’s pre game rituals, because I appreciate that you make such a full entertainment in a show, and you have, like, your body, your armor, and like you’re ready. So but what is your pre ritual like when you’re filming a special? Mine is like, so boring. It’s like one full pack of gum, which I swallow, and like, two full Cokes, two full sugar Cokes. Wait, it’s like, so lame.

 

Heather McMahan  37:44

Wait, hold on, how did you How do you chew and swallow gum and then drink two full Cokes? Are are you not burping the whole time?

 

Samantha Bee  37:53

I suppress every life instinct in my body, like it goes into, like the body goes into a fugue state. It’s just like an out of all the burps hold until, somehow, I don’t know how, it’s like, probably adrenaline.

 

Heather McMahan  38:09

Cortisol, it’s just cortisol.

 

Samantha Bee  38:11

Yeah, just the power of cortisol. It’s making another polyp, it’s creating, it’s all in the surface of another internal growth, terrible, but what is your How do you pre game for stuff like that?

 

Heather McMahan  38:26

It is so lame, and it’s funny because I’ll chit chat with other male comedians, and they’re like, Yeah, this what I do. And the whole gang works out together. We do other shit. I’m like, no. I mean, I, you know, I’ll try out my one of my best friends, Raymond Padilla, opens for me. And so, you know, we’re like sassy backstage, like we’re scrolling through Tiktok for two hours just letting our brain seep out of our our head. And then I do all my own hair and makeup, because, again, old theater kid, I like to sit down, I have my pre show playlist that I play for myself, and it is, and then I just, I beat a face I put, you know, I get the wig ready, and what do I eat beforehand? My writer is also so depressing. I can’t really eat much before a show. I’m like you, I will chug a coke. I’ll just get a little sugar. I’ll have like, half a protein bar, because I’ve got bubble guts. I am too nervous. The diarrhea is raging, so I just have to have enough to, like, hold it together. And then after a show, though, I will come on stage and I sweat like cat Williams. I mean, I need like a beach towel on the side of the stage when I am done. And my outfits are always, like, opulent and heavy, and, you know, not breathable. So I rip off a glitter jacket after a show. You could wring it out. It’s disgusting. And then I am woofing down some sort of, like deep dish pizza or carnitas after the show. I mean, it’s, it’s diabolical the way that I eat. It’s feral, it.

 

Samantha Bee  39:48

Yeah, are you a late night person?

 

Heather McMahan  39:50

Oh, yeah.

 

Samantha Bee  39:50

Like, oh, you are. You’re like, okay, carnitas is fine at 9:30 to 10pm because you’re like, I’m gonna be away for hours.

 

Heather McMahan  39:58

Yeah, and then I’ll have like, three bites. Of tacos, and then I’ll go out and do a meet and greet afterwards, and then be burping the whole meet and greet. But I listen to this very specific Spotify playlist sometimes when I get anxious. It’s called, just called Cocktail Jazz, and it makes you feel like you’re in the Bemelmans bar at the Carlisle. And I turn that on. And then right before I’m about to go out, all of something like pit bull, Meg the stallion, Tupac, like something that’ll really get me in a party mode, but it goes from Cocktail Jazz to Meg the stallion very quickly.

 

Samantha Bee  40:31

Well, that thought more Choice Words after one more break.

 

Samantha Bee  40:58

Did you know when you were like, I guess, at what age did you know that you wanted to do this? Or did you think it would be sort of, you knew that you wanted to be a performer. What was the point in your life when you went, I know.

 

Heather McMahan  43:11

Actually, funny enough. It’s very specific. I was in the fourth grade, and we were doing a, you know, read out loud in front of the class, and I had a feeling that my teacher was auditioning us for the elementary play. And I remember reading with such enthusiasm, and I really I was doing voices, and I remember looking at my fourth grade teacher, Miss mankind, I’ll never forget it. And she’s like, Heather, can I see you after class? And I’m like, I knew this was an audition bitch. And she was like, would you want to be in the, you know, the play and the Christmas play, and I said, Honey, only with the speaking role. And from then on, I was always a theater kid, like I just knew getting up and being funny in front of people and getting that first laugh was like a rush I can never explain. I don’t know. And then the first time I ever really did stand up Stand up was at my junior prom. So this, it was the senior class, and I was a junior, and we always had like a surprise for the seniors. And that year they asked me, they said, Heather, would you consider doing like a roast? Now, I also went to, like a very over the top, Uber religious Christian school, private school in Atlanta, and I said, Let me, let me do it. And I did, like a 30 minute set and roasted the entire senior class. And after that, I mean, imagine how bad that could have gone. That is the most awkward time of your life. It could have gone horribly. And I walked off stage and I crushed, and I said, well, I’m gonna have to do this forever. And that was it.

 

Samantha Bee  44:29

What the hell yeah, that’s incredible.

 

Heather McMahan  44:33

And a wild note so Jeff Fox, where these kids went to my school, and I took the tape from that, from the prom for my performance, and I dropped it off at his house. I just put it in his mailbox, and he called me, like, a couple weeks later, and was like, Hey, this is great. And he just happened to have been producing and shooting his Blue Collar Comedy TV show, not the tour, but they did a live sketch comedy show. And so he was like, Do you want. Can be a writer’s assistant for the summer before you go to Ole Miss. And so I got to work and, like, watch all the writers and and hang out with that whole crew, the blue collar guys. And Jeff and I are still friends, like, he’s a, he’s been a such a doll to me in this business.

 

Samantha Bee  45:13

Oh, my god, that’s amazing, did I mean I feel like that’s what it takes? Yeah, I was watching you. I was watching you on a podcast talking about how you would slip your card to everyone, to everyone, like working at SoulCycle, slipping your card into their little satchels. Like just constantly working it like working the room, knowing what it takes.

 

Heather McMahan  45:38

When I mean, it works. When I worked at SoulCycle in West Hollywood, I would there was a very famous instructor named Angela, and she was always late, and she always had the biggest celebrities in her room. So I asked Angela. I said, Angela, I know you’re running late. I’m gonna put on a headset and do bits and warm up the class so that they’re not like, you know, where is this woman? I mean, there was anybody from David Beckham in that class to, you know, Beyonce to everybody. And I knew there was, like, secretly all the producers in the corner, so I was like, I just have to be funny. And I would go in there with a headset on and literally be passing out waters and just doing bits. And it got me a lot of jobs.

 

Samantha Bee  46:13

Oh, my God, I love it so much. I’m a hustler. You are a hustler. Um, what made you choose Atlanta to live I love. First of all, we made a TV show in Atlanta, and we lived there for maybe four months. And I loved living there.

 

Heather McMahan  46:28

I had originally come back to Atlanta in 2016 my dad had died of cancer. I had to pick up my life, move home, and I was, really, was feeling woe is me, like this is it? Yeah, my comedy career is going to be on hold. And that’s actually when things took off for me, because I started putting my jokes on Instagram stories, and that was kind of the original launch for me, and it just took off. It was wild. And then I started putting all my characters on Instagram, so I was kind of that early adapter to the Instagram storytelling that took off. And then I moved back to New York with my husband. We were there for a couple years. Pandemic hit, and then we came back down to Atlanta, and we’re like, we love it down here. You know, I I’m still best friends with all my friends from high school. I see my usual crew, but then I get to go to New York and LA and do the thing. But I swear to God, as soon as you leave LA, that’s when they call you. As soon as you leave New York, that’s when they want you back.

 

Samantha Bee  47:19

Of course, I mean, isn’t that always the way? Like, at what point did you realize, because you’re putting all your stuff on Instagram, you’re doing characters, you’re just, like, kind of doing what you want to do, like, being totally self directed, at what point did you realize, like, really realize that you had, like, fans, and I know that’s a weird question, in a way, but like, at what point did you go, Wait a minute. It’s like, kind of real, like, there’s a multiplication effect happening here in a real way.

 

Heather McMahan  47:49

I think I put on I was doing a show for the American Cancer Society. It was like a benefit. I was like, let’s just put it up at dad’s garage, which is a big Improv Theater here in Atlanta. I was like, let’s just see what happens. It sold out in like 10 seconds, like, something crazy. And then I got agents, and they’re like, All right, let’s see how you can do on a tour. And we sold out the whole tour in like 10 minutes, and it was just wild. And then we just kept building it and building it. I mean, I I think what’s wild is the engagement on these social media platforms. Women want to chit chat. They feel like they’re a part of a sense of community, and there’s plenty of guys that follow along and go, that follow along and come to shows, and they have a great time. My material talk speaks to them as well. But it was like women, I think finally felt like, Hey, this is our girl. We’re in we’re in the living room with you while you were saying all these things, and we feel the same way. So I really chalk it up to a lot of the gals who like, really like, just push the engagement. I’m so grateful to them.

 

Samantha Bee  48:41

People, I bet you, everyone comes up to you and they’re like, Heather, we’re best friends.

 

Heather McMahan  48:45

Yeah, well, it is interesting. And I’m sure you get this too, like in the podcasting space, it’s a very parasocial relationship, because people hear you all day. They know every bit about my family and comedy is so different. I will go out with some of my friends who are actors who have, like, won an Oscar. Nobody bugs them, but me, they’re like, how is your diarrhea, or is your eczema still flared up? Like, I’m, I’m worried about you girl, and I’m like, yes, my eczema is on fire today, but thank you for asking. It’s a totally different relationship.

 

Samantha Bee  49:14

Yeah, it’s really personal. Like, it’s like, right? You’re not playing a character. You are yourself. You’re like a heightened version of yourself, right? It’s it’s real. The stories are true to your life. It’s different. But I bet you have very like, apart from, obviously, people’s comments and stuff, which is like a whole other world, when people come up to you, I bet that you receive them with such kindness, because usually it’s always well and it’s usually very well intentioned. People don’t normally come up to you to tell you that they don’t like you. They come up to you because they love you.

 

Heather McMahan  49:46

No, and honestly, I’m like, Who has the energy these days to really like fight with somebody? I gotta be honest. No, I’m really blessed. I mean, obviously, outside the election and being outspoken as like a Southern woman who is supporting Kamala, for the most part, it’s. Everybody’s in this together. So women are always like, Hey, girl, I love this. This makes me laugh. What I love is when dudes come up to me, it’s so different, because women will just like, they get excited, and I’m like, what is it? Why do we become feral animals? We’re just like, but when dudes come up, it’s a quick DAP, they’re like, love the shit. Thanks for keeping my wife happy. You’re like, saw you at the Radio City, best show ever, DAP, and then they just disappear. And that’s really fun to be like, you keep it cruising, you keep it moving, you know.

 

Samantha Bee  50:28

And I do want to, I always, I ask everybody this, because like you are, like, you’re coming, like, you go there. It’s, like, pretty raunchy. I love it. I totally love it. I don’t, and I don’t think that only male comedians should be able to talk about their p9 sex more jobs. I appreciate, I appreciate the openness. And so I I love to ask my guests what they think that the ideal sex ed should actually look like. Because if you went to a very religious Christian school, Yeah, I bet you didn’t get the highest quality sex ed in the world.

 

Heather McMahan  51:01

I got zero sex ed, zero. I wouldn’t even be zero. Negative sex ed, you know, abstinence till you die. The cool thing was, my parents were awesome. So they were always like, listen, we’re getting a great education. You’re very safe at the school. But, like, we’ll tell you about the birds and the bees. I mean, my dad was driving me to I went to another high school’s prom. My dad was driving me to go to this prom. And he was like, just so, you know, sex should be enjoyable and always consensual, and the girls who go to college, who’ve never had sex, they end up being the biggest hoes. And he was like, have a great night.

 

Samantha Bee  51:34

Have fun out there.

 

Heather McMahan  51:35

Have fun out there, so, um, yeah, I was sex ed. What should be a good sex ed? You know, this was also interesting, because calling back to, like, when I did IVF, I didn’t even realize how little we as women knew about our own menstrual cycles, you know, like, No, when you’re tracking all this, I’m like, how do we not know about this? And then, and then I asked my husband, you know, the old age question of, hey, you know, when there’s three different types of tampons, what did the letters stand for? And watching his brain just like, melt down. I’m like, they don’t know either. And he went to a public school in New York City. I’m like, How does no one know any of this information? So I’m just hoping, in a way, I can lure the guys in by being a little by being very tongue in cheek and very or just like, letting them know and letting it rip, which is funny, because I’m not actually that, um, crass in in real life. I’m actually a very soft person, but for some reason, when I get on stage, it’s like a different person, a different persona, takes over.

 

Samantha Bee  52:32

Yeah, it’s like a performance energy.

 

Heather McMahan  52:35

Yes.

 

Samantha Bee  52:35

Like, it’s like a, it’s not a, it’s not even a character, it’s just a performance level human being, right like, channel. It’s like, I don’t know, my friend says this, and I think it’s akin to this. She’s like, it’s like, the Holy Spirit comes, truly takes over, just takes over. You’ve put all the pieces together, you’ve done all the hard work, and then you just wait, and the Holy Spirit comes. It takes over. Not that this is, this is not my evangelical podcast, but I feel that like I went to Catholic school. I’m like, Okay, that’s a it’s an image I really recognize.

 

Heather McMahan  53:10

I just I believe that to my core. I mean, listen sometimes on my pre show playlist is Kirk Franklin stomp. Okay, okay, if that does not make you feel ready to go and listen. I do believe God gives you gifts, and by gift, there are days where I’m doing blow job jokes. I’m like, I don’t know if this was a part of it, but I’m like, if my job is to take you out of whatever bullshit you’re dealing with that day, to come sit in a theater and giggle and laugh and leave with a new conversation with your girlfriends or your husband or your family, then I did my job. That’s all it is. Let’s not make it like bigger than it needs to be, is I want to make you feel good, that’s it.

 

Samantha Bee  53:44

That is so real. Oh my god. I knew it was gonna be so much fun to talk to you. And they have delivered.

 

Heather McMahan  53:51

What an honor I am. Such a fan you also, you’ve been paving the way and doing the damn thing in the biz for a minute, and like, I’m just so honored that to have this moment.

 

Samantha Bee  54:01

Oh, my God. I love when people get out there. They say this, everything, just laying it out there. Yeah, I respect it. I respect it so hard. And I just love to see a woman build a career that has legs. You have so much power in the industry if you have the skills to back it up, and you have built a business with your own intelligence and strength. And I like give it over to you.

 

Heather McMahan  54:26

Oh, my God, you’re so kind. And I honestly thank you for the pep talk, because I needed that driving to Mississippi tomorrow so.

 

Samantha Bee  54:34

Oh yeah, strength.

 

Heather McMahan  54:38

This was great. Thank you for having much. Oh, my God, you’re a dream.

 

Samantha Bee  54:47

That was Heather McMahan, and I had no choice but to look up one thing Heather mentioned desperately wanting to find one of the engraved silver Tiffany’s dog bowls that belong to Joan Rivers. Well okay, I’m a pretty good internet Sleuth. I thought I could find it for her jokes on me, the only one I could find sold at Christie’s in 2016 for $14,000 well, okay, thanks for joining us. I’m Samantha Bee and see you next week for some more Choice Words.

 

CREDITS  55:32

Thank you for listening to Choice Words, which was created by and is hosted by me. The show is produced by […], with editing and additional producing by Josh Richmond. We are distributed by Lemonada Media, and you can find me @realsambee on X and Instagram. Follow Choice Words wherever you get your podcasts or listen ad free on Amazon music with your Prime membership.