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Description

Comedian Atsuko Okatsuka joins Hoja, Kiki, and Mohanad for a special episode about apologizing to family. Atsuko recounts one of her most memorable apologies of all time – from her estranged father at an Indonesian waterpark. Mohanad asks for an apology from his mom back in Libya who always calls in the middle of the night (and can never put down the phone). Then, the team unpacks the ongoing feud between celebrity sisters Britney and Jamie Lynn Spears. Plus, the hosts share their thoughts on the ‘Sex and the City’ reboot and the character everyone loves to hate, Che Diaz.

Please note, I’m Sorry contains mature themes and may not be appropriate for all listeners.

Follow Atsuko Okatsuka on Twitter and Instagram @atsukocomedy.

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For additional resources, information, and a transcript of the episode, visit lemonadamedia.com.

Transcript

SPEAKERS

Hoja Lopez, Mohanad Elshieky, Kiki Monique, Atsuko Okatsuka

Kiki Monique  00:08

I’m Kiki Monique. And this is I’M SORRY, a podcast about apologies. And I was this week old when I learned that Fes from that 70 show is just short for foreign exchange student. It’s not actually his name. The stoner kids just like, deemed his name like unpronounceable.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Cool. And this is Mohanad Elshieky, very pronounceable name. And this week, just like last week, I am still alive. And I’m just gonna keep at it.

Hoja Lopez 

And I’m Hoja Lopez and I slept all week with no sheets on my bed because I just haven’t really wanted to put them on there. Because I’m being lazy this week. I hope everyone can forgive me for that.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Happy for you.

Hoja Lopez 

Am I sad? Is that what that is, is that sadness? I got cold, really cold this week. And I’m really trying to process it you guys. So I’ll put the sheets on my bed. If you want.

Mohanad Elshieky  01:09

I think you should even if you don’t want to. Yeah, you should. 100% Go for it. We’ll wait for you.

Kiki Monique 

We are talking to Atsuko Okatsuka today, really exciting. She is a stand-up comedian. And actor, a writer, Mohanad has done some Zoom comedy shows with her, amazing. And I think I mean, everyone in my life mostly knows her as the person who started the drop challenge which, if you’re not familiar, if you’re not on Tik Tok, it’s a Beyonce song, I think it’s partition. And her and her grandmother are going around LA, basically dropping it low in various places around the city and it became a challenge, the drop challenge. I literally have sent it to multiple group chats because I’m trying to get any of my friends to do it with me. So we’re going to be talking with Atsuko about Brittany and Jamie Lynn and family stuff and of course some Che Diaz because Mohammed has a lot to get off his chest.

Mohanad Elshieky  02:25

Yes, we’re gonna talk about Che Diaz, is my favorite stand-up comedian on Earth and someone who I hope to be like one day.

Kiki Monique

Atsuko, thank you for joining us. You’ve actually been trending in my group chats like multiple group chats in my phone. Because you started the drop challenge. I mean, like that. And that is like, I don’t really do many challenges, but like, that was one I was like, oh, let’s go do this one. I need to understand. When you when you start a challenge, like a TikTok challenge, do you go in with the mindset of like, I am creating a challenge or does it go viral, then you’re like, oh, I need to attach a challenge to it?

Atsuko Okatsuka 

I’m sure some people go into it. Like I’m going to create something, my mind does not know how to work like that. I don’t want to work like that. It was just us having fun. So I’m so glad that folks like it spoke to them enough to squat all over the world.

Kiki Monique 

Everyone is squatty, I don’t know Mohanad and Hoja have been squatting all over the world. But a lot of people think that when they see how far I can drop, they’re surprised. So I’m like I want the world to see like I can drop it really far. All the way.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Fuck them for being surprised.

Kiki Monique 

Exactly.

Mohanad Elshieky 

No, I’ve seen it. I enjoyed it. But I don’t like to be challenged at all. I was like good for them. I’m just gonna take the L here and just, you know, be happy for people doing good.

Atsuko Okatsuka  04:01

See, this is why I came on to this podcast because I knew everyone on the podcast or you know, like their own autonomous beings with the ability to make their own decisions where they want to do the challenge or not.

Hoja Lopez 

I like doing challenges and showing no one I like knowing as a power grab in my mind that I can do the challenges in a silent dark room with no audience. Yeah, and be successful. And then I tell no one except for you guys, right in this moment.

Mohanad Elshieky

Yeah, and everyone who listens to this podcast.

Hoja Lopez 

So I’m doing some freaky shit in my own room at night.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah, you like doing things for yourself. May I suggest a zoom comedy show. Just like now. Like in 2022.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, the zoom, the Zoom comedy show like in 2022. Like, do you think that you could pull the audiences the way you could in 2020?

Mohanad Elshieky 

I love that. Kiki, you’re implying that in 2020, the audience was pulled at all.

Kiki Monique 

I attended three zoom comedy shows in 2020. I’m saying, I thought everyone was doing it.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I always say 70% of the Zoom comedy shows I’ve done you look at me on the screen, and you’d think someone is holding a gun next to me and making me do this?

Kiki Monique 

Well, the worst part was like not being able to like laugh with other people. Like it was the muted laughs that really like made me not want to attend future zoom comedy shows.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah, no, I get you. And I actually I’m a villain, because I made Mohanad do a comedy show for just librarians. Do you remember that? And I was surprised you still talk to me.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Those are good. They actually stayed unmuted the whole time. Right. That’s my main problem is that people just like, sometimes you have an audience, and they just will not unmute themselves. And their cameras are off. And it’s just like, I’m being held hostage here, because I’m not sure what’s happening. And they they’ve if they typed in the chat, that’s good. I’m like, no, that’s just Twitter like this is like. What I love about standup is no one gets to react to what I’m seeing in real time and tell me what do you think about my words? And also, like, try to tag them? I’m just like, no, are you telling my jokes right now?

Atsuko Okatsuka  06:32

Yeah, you’re right. You’re right. But these librarians, they weren’t really like writing in the chat. They were watching the show. Props to them. Essential workers.

Kiki Monique

I love that. Yeah. You know, I was reading your background, and you, I was crying laughing when you were telling the story about the time you went to see your father, and you went to a water park. And like, just reading it. I mean, I think that the audience needs to understand just how hilarious stories is, but it actually ended up in this beautiful apology. I don’t know if this is one of the best apologies you’ve ever received, or one that’s the most memorable. But I would love for people to just hear this story, because it’s amazing.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah. So you know, my father and I are sort of like separated from each other. Honestly, my family owed me a lot of apologies, various family members. Because, you know, the reason I didn’t see my dad for a long time is because essentially, my grandma kidnapped me to the United States, you know, after the divorce and all this stuff between my dad and my mom. And you know, when you kidnapped someone to the US with just a tourist visa, right, what happens is, you know, you become undocumented immigrants, if you overstay.

Kiki Monique

She said you’re just going on a vacation to Los Angeles for a couple months. And then  so you think you don’t say goodbye to your friends or anything. And you’re just like, Cool. See in a couple months, and then never leave LA.

Atsuko Okatsuka  08:08

That screws a person up. Look at me now. Forcing Mohanad to do librarian shows. I said, you know, I don’t even know what I said, to try to make it sound good. I said, hey, you know, they love comedy. I think that’s what it was. That was the cell.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, and I also paid.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Right, right. Right. It helps to be fed up by be like, you know, I’m a big fan, you know, love your jokes. You know, I think that stroke the ego enough, but anyway, I’m not. I’m not a normal functioning person. And it’s because of that, like, I didn’t know I was going to be like living here. I didn’t know I was going to be stuck here. If you want to, you know, come back to the States. When you’re undocumented. You can’t leave you know, so I was separated from my dad. I hadn’t and so it had been many, many years. When I finally got my green card. That’s when I decided to go visit him. And by then he was living in Bali as a retired man. And so he just tried to really make it up, you know, make up for the last time so he bought tickets to a waterpark for us.

Hoja Lopez 

How old were you at that point?

Atsuko Okatsuka

I was 17. Yeah, and, you know, waterpark, I don’t swim, but he doesn’t know that because that’s what happens.

Kiki Monique 

When you haven’t seen someone.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

We barely know each other. We don’t know our interests. Mine’s not anything near the water.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, and also waterpark you know, also it’s like 17-year-old doesn’t also seem like it would be something you would take a 17-year-old but also you discover the waterpark really is just an ocean.

Atsuko Okatsuka

Right. In Indonesia. That’s just ocean. He took me, he parked, we’re here. I said this is all just, it’s just open ocean. And it’s just like a bunch of uncles brought like little boats and a couple of like, you know, things they created on their own that are rides and started charging people and they call it a waterpark.

Kiki Monique  10:14

It’s kind of like did you ever see that documentary a Class Action Park? It was about Action Park in New Jersey. Sounds like a version of that where it’s just homemade water Park.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah. It’s just the hustle is a form of hustle. And I respect that so much, you know? Yeah. And so he had me going on, like, he had me do paragliding. He had me do like a flying fish boat. That was one of the rides and the flying fish boat. They call it that because you’re attached to a boat. It’s like a floating device with like, two little strings that you hang on to, no life vest, nothing. And then sometimes, and then you’re getting pulled by this boat. And sometimes the ball goes so fast that you become vertical to the water. Again, just holding a little string. Yeah. And so he was doing things like that. And the thing is, he wouldn’t go on any of the rides with me. He was just there to take pictures of me doing it.

Mohanad Elshieky

Oh my god. That’s so funny.

Hoja Lopez 

It’s like putting you in life and death situations and going like, you got this baby girl. Which is such a dad thing to do. Like one time my dad took me to a rotisserie chicken place in the full nude when I was eight years old, and have been just hopping on tables and slipping.

Kiki Monique 

Dads are the worst babysitters.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah, because they just think you know, and I get it exactly like what you just said, baby girl when you said that. I was like, it’s because the last time we saw each other I was 10. So he’s like, what do 10-year-olds like, you know?

Kiki Monique  12:02

I mean, the way you describe the paragliding was that it was just a tarp attached to a boat that you hang on and the boat takes off. And then you start flying through the air on a tarp.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Again, a very, you know, it’s that hustle. You know, it’s that island hustle where it’s just like tarp string. No life vest still. And you go taking off in the air. I just wanted to be on a boat at one point. It’s all these things that are attached to a boat. And then it goes really fast. And you’re like, either, you know, anyway, yeah. So that’s what I got really hurt with the paragliding. Because you’re supposed to come down gently, like by pulling on the strings either left or right. And the people down at the shore, who are like, quote unquote, experts, they try to tell you which one to pool to come down, like gently.

Kiki Monique 

They’re just screaming in the air.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

I can’t hear them. They don’t have like a megaphone. Again. It’s very DIY, you know, Indonesia, love them. But just like screaming, and then I also don’t understand the language. So I’m just pulling out both strings really, really fast. So I come crashing down onto rocks, and I’m bleeding. And my dad runs over to me gets a couple more picks in.

Kiki Monique 

He took some pictures before he helped you.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

But at this point, I’m like, pretty frustrated, you know, and I’m hurt because I’m like, I don’t even like anything water. I don’t. And I haven’t seen you in a long time. This isn’t really like getting to know each other. You know, it’s just you watching me do extreme sports. And so that’s when the apology came, you know, where he was like, I’m so sorry. I’m bleeding, you know, out of my knees. He’s I’m so sorry. I just really wanted to make up for last time. And I just love you so much. I wanted to show you that. And that’s when I was like, okay, well, you know, beer. I like beer. Do you like beer? Yeah, we could do that. And so we went to do that. And then we got to really catch up.

Kiki Monique  14:25

So yeah, I love that. I mean, is that your favorite apology of all time.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

I’m still waiting for one from grandma. My grandma moved me from Tokyo. So she should apologize.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, that felt like a downgrade.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

People were shocked. They said your phone where, I said Japan, they said what? Now you live in a garage with your mom and grandma, your uncle’s garage with no papers?

Mohanad Elshieky

I’ll say this. I mean the US have like a very good PR, they’re so good. It doesn’t matter where you’re from. Well, you have to come and see for yourself. And then the second year here either like, you figured it out. Yeah, yeah, whatever. Yeah, moving from Japan. I just can’t imagine that just being here and being like, well, I have less stuff now. That’s cool.

Atsuko Okatsuka  15:26

Yeah, I live near Tokyo Disneyland. That was nice.

Hoja Lopez 

I just imagined the Disney land from Libya or Venezuela. It didn’t have that special magic.

Mohanad Elshieky 

You’ll only live in Disneyland adjacent cities.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Cuz I moved to LA.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Exactly. Exactly. And you’re like, well, it’s either that or Florida. So I guess we’ll just gonna go with LA.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah, I was like, is there an amusement park? Okay, I’m in.

Mohanad Elshieky  16:03

As long it’s not a waterpark, then we’re good.

Kiki Monique 

How do I get someone to kidnap me and take me to Tokyo for two months on a vacation? And meet me there. Because now that’s kind of like, I would love to do that.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

I’ll give him my grandma’s number.

Kiki Monique 

You been keeping up with the Britney and Jamie of it all but Jamie Lynn Spears and Britney Spears have it all. I mean, we’ve definitely seen Brittany, grow up. And we’ve seen Jamie Lynn grow up. And now we’re on the end, like the other end of it, where now they’re both parents and they’re sisters that hate each other, which I kind of relate to even more in this weird way. Like, even though I don’t want to see it play out, like having the siblings that are like going at each other. I mean, Jamie Lynn just did this big interview along with this book where she is essentially, it’s almost like she wants an apology, because she wants us to acknowledge which you know, rightfully so she grew up in that same household. And they both kind of went through this together. And Britney was in this conservatorship for what 13-14 years. And, you know, Jamie Lynn is saying I had nothing to do with that conservatorship. That was dad, that was mom. And her lawyers weren’t taking care of her. And in this interview, she even said, you know, Brittany and I went on vacation to Hawaii. And that’s when Brittany told me, you know, I’m not happy with my situation.

Kiki Monique 

And I said, look, let me help you, you know, maybe, you know, you can come live with me in Louisiana, because I’ve heard that if you live out of state, you know, you can for a certain period of time, you can get out of a conservatorship, you know, let me talk to your lawyer. And she said that she, you know, reached out to lawyers and did all these things. And she showed, you know, screenshots of text messages between the two of them, essentially saying like, I was never a part of this conservatorship, but then when you kind of look into some of the paperwork, some of the people getting paid were like her husband’s company. So it’s like it gets it’s really convoluted, right? So we don’t really know the answer. But what we do know is that if your sister was somewhere for 13 years as a kid, maybe you wouldn’t be aware of it. But as an adult, the minute she said, I’m not happy, right? Wouldn’t you? If you had a platform with millions of followers, which you do. Wouldn’t you take that and say like, oh, right, I want the world to know, my sister is unhappy, and I want to do everything in my power to get her out of this.

Hoja Lopez  18:53

I do think that that interaction of like having a very famous older sister, and then you sort of like kind of trailing in the shadow of that a little bit. I mean, I would venture to say, me and my sister have obviously not the same but a similar relationship and that I am very loud and outspoken and do performative things. Whereas my sister is very sort of like, quiet and internal and very, like analytical, so I could see how, you know, when you grow up, and there’s a lot of sibling differentiation, I could see how things start to kind of get a little weird, even as kids just based on Britney’s fame, not to say that I didn’t enjoy, you know, Zoey 101. But, yeah, it seems like there’s some weird stuff brewing here from the moment that they’re kids.

Kiki Monique 

Well, I think this, I think the weird part like I think the saddest part, because the first thing that Jamie Lynn said in her interview was, you know, I was an accident. I was an oops baby, because she’s, you know, 10 years younger than Brittany and her father had a vasectomy, but he didn’t go get his checkup. So then he ends up, I’m pregnating the mom. So Jamie Lynn comes along. So the siblings you have Brittany Jean, and you have I think it’s Brian James. So everyone has these BJ initials, but then they decide to just take the mom’s name and the dad’s name Jamie Lynn, and call her that. And then on top of that Lynn is normally in their family spelled with an E, they didn’t even give her the E. So she was already like, I feel like nobody wants me. Nobody cares about me. So she kind of grew up in the shadows just kind of like being quiet. And I think that obviously played a lot into like, look, you know, she was a teen mom, she gets pregnant at 16. Like, she was obviously like, there were like, calls for help. You know, she had this really famous sibling. And so maybe, you know, when she went away, she you know, she didn’t think anything of it, because she’s like a kid. This is all she knows. I think people are just mad that like, now she’s 30. And she’s like, You’re aware that your sister was in this situation?

Atsuko Okatsuka  20:57

Yeah, no, it’s kind of, it’s tough. Just because your siblings, not everyone, not everyone’s […] can just like, be taken it up for my sibling. You know, like, I’m gonna speak up for my sibling and write articles about this is my identity now, speaking up for my sibling, against father, whatever, you know what I mean? Or father figure? Yeah, I mean, because sometimes, you know, there’s people who haven’t talked to their siblings in years, you know what I’m saying? I mean, especially if you have that baggage of like, I was a mistake baby. And she was the star number one. She’s so lucky. She’s a star, but she cries, maybe that was about Jamie Lynn.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I mean, I don’t know, I think my issue now is she was trying to get me to read a book. And I’m just like, I’m not gonna do that. Like, just read a blog, though. Like, maybe like somebody would just read it and just explain it to me, but a book? That’s asking too much from me.

Kiki Monique  22:00

And can you imagine what the audio version would be like? I mean, Jamie Lynn, trying to read her story to you. I mean, no.

Hoja Lopez 

Yall’s librarians friends would be extremely disappointed in your behavior, your librarian Zoom friends. They would be like, one book, you’re complaining about reading one book?

Mohanad Elshieky 

I mean, that’s the life they chose. They chose to read every book in the library.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah, we chose to speak for a living, you know, and that’s something they discourage actually. Speaking, when we’re in their space, so.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Right, exactly. Yeah. So do the thing. But I mean, to your point. I mean, I also cannot imagine being the sibling of Britney Spears, which is, you know, everyone knows who Britney Spears is, literally just like, one of the most famous people on earth. Yeah, that would, I mean, that would destroy me just like having to live in someone else’s shadow and just being referenced as the sibling of. So I don’t know, I think there’s anyone to blame here really, it’s mostly their father, because that’s the real douchebag.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah. So they have you know, so they have this back and forth right now, that’s happening in real time. I mean, the books come out, you know, Britney’s lawyers issued a cease and desist to Jamie Lynn, basically saying, if you say anything negative about Brittany, we’re going to have an issue. And Britney has been posting sort of like, notes posts to her IG essentially, you know, calling her sister things from like, fake and you know, kind of reliving some things that happened in their childhood. And, you know, it’s kind of weird, because so much of the free Britney movement, I thought was about like, giving her space and not like putting the spotlight so much on her, right? Because the media is what you know, caused her to sort of spiral in the first place. And so it’s kind of weird that now she has a voice, and she’s putting it online. We are paying more and more attention to it. I don’t know, like, how do we like navigate this? Like, do we just let her like have her voice and we keep reporting on it. You know, she wants to say things, but it also feels weird. It’s like watching people in public fight, which is never comfortable at all.

Hoja Lopez  24:24

If I see people screaming anywhere, I’m like, oh my god, I have to know what’s happening. And then I’ll just place myself perfectly and try to make myself very small, so as to not interrupt whatever their regular life is, but I don’t know how to deal with it really. Like it feels, it definitely feels like I’m in somebody’s living room and two sisters are like, you know, yelling about really painful things to them. And I’m like, it doesn’t feel like I should be a part of this. But also they’re bringing it into the public. I think Jamie Lynn in particular. I don’t think I’ve ever been like great at public fighting like if I am definitely a tough person that like, we will deal with this at home like with anybody that I’m having a problem with. I’m like, this is not the appropriate place for this. But I do. I beg other people to fight in public so that I may be a witness to it. But something that I recently learned too was that I mean, up until like, 2018, up until really the free Britney movement kind of started up. Britney was posting positive stuff about her sister in 2017, and 2018, like, joking together and also kind of like celebrating or sending tweets out about, you know, some of Jamie Lynn’s achievements. So it’s clear that the souring is maybe a little bit more recent, or I don’t know if..

Kiki Monique 

That’s if you believe that she was actually posting…

Hoja Lopez 

Like behind her social media stuff. Right. So I don’t know, it seems like there’s some conspiracy theories there on whether or not she was actually posting to her own social media. But all that to say that generally in public things were positive up until the free Brittany movement kind of started calling out Jamie Lynn.

Kiki Monique  26:10

And it seems like the apology that Britney really wants from Jamie Lynn is, look, she says I love you. You’re my sister. I’ll love you forever. But you sided with the people that did this to me. And I think when they’re saying that they’re referring to obviously, the dad, Jamie, the mom, but also this Lou Taylor that keeps coming up in conversation. So Lou Taylor, I can’t remember exactly her position around the family. But what I do remember about her is when Courtney Love started speaking up for Britney Spears, she said, Lou Taylor is the one that tried to put me in a conservatorship. I don’t know if you’ve seen that movie.

Hoja Lopez 

I care a lot.

Kiki Monique 

Yes, I care a lot. It almost feels like that movie was based on Lou Taylor or someone like Lou Taylor, because, you know, Courtney was saying that Lou tried to get her to conservatorship, because Courtney owns all, you know, half the rights to the Nirvana, you know, music. And so it’s just interesting that this woman, and apparently the interview that took place everyone said that Jamie Lynn did was in Lou Taylor’s house. So she still has a relationship with this woman. And you know, when people are pulling out paperwork, they’re saying, the money trail leads to this woman. And it’s all back to her. So I think that’s the apology ultimately, that Brittany is trying to get is like, get these people out of your life that destroyed my life and stop trying to you know, be friendly. I mean, the same way if I’m not friends with you, you better unfollow them on Instagram.

Hoja Lopez 

Like loyalty is big for you. You mean?

Kiki Monique 

Making you unfollow on Instagram; you best believe you better cut business relationships.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah, I don’t think that’s a lot to ask for at all. Like how Jamie handled it as a kid or whatever. You know, sure. That’s hard. That’s hard. But now if that’s all your sister’s asking for, I don’t think that’s hard. Just do it. I mean, unless I guess your husband’s getting money out of it, too. But then you are a villain. You’re a villain.

Kiki Monique  28:17

I think the problem is money, right. Because if Jamie Lynn was making money in some way, shape, or form him is conservatorship. And now the only way she can make money is trying to sell. You know what I’m saying? Like the stories behind it. Oh, that’s like the slippery slope.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I literally feel like the second that you’re like, I have a memoir. I’m just like, oh, here we go.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

I know. I know. Everyone’s evil, who gave her the book deal? You know what I’m saying?

Mohanad Elshieky 

Exactly. Yeah, like, it’s like when like the Trump people like every time like someone leaves office and they’re like, okay, now I have a memoir to why he’s bad. I mean, it’s like, too late. I don’t want to, I’m not gonna read.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, memoirs. Like they should really be reserved for people who like have made like, tremendous impact on our society.

Mohanad Elshieky

That’s just the gossip column, like you could just contribute to something you know like with Jamie just like contribute to I don’t know people’s, start a podcast like everyone’s book on […] What is that 201? I don’t know. I never watched a show.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I’ll say this about memoirs in general, I feel like the memoir industrial complex needs to be abolished soon. because everyone I know now has a memoir. And I’m just like, you’re literally the least interesting person I know, what you’re writing about? Or like sometimes someone is like young and I’m just like, what have you done? Your life hasn’t even started yet and you’re like, this is read these 300 pages of my thoughts on stuff.

Mohanad Elshieky

You really need to sometimes empower imposter syndrome in some people, you know, be like, you know, maybe you should think that you can’t do this because this is helpful for everyone involved.

Kiki Monique  30:05

It sounds like she would have to do some apologizing on Zoey 101 though, because I think they were trying to do a reunion. And then one of the actresses came out saying how like Jamie Lynn was a bully on that set. And so there was a whole Instagram post about that. So whether that’s true, I mean, it sounds like she maybe was a bratty kid which I’m not surprised. Your sister was Britney Spears. You were like getting deals because of it. I mean, I probably a 13-year-old brat too, let’s be real.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Well, then she should just stay at home being a mother. I don’t know.

Hoja Lopez

I’ve heard women should do that. And I agree. What are you doing out there on the streets. It’s too late, Honey, go home.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Cook, do some dishes. Don’t work, get paid less than your male counterparts. You should just do that.

Mohanad Elshieky

Well speaking of villains of just I just don’t want us to not talk about this even quickly, is Che Diaz because I really wanted to touch on that really quick because I was like, are we gonna end this without talking about this person

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Damn it, Mohanad. Oh, okay.

Mohanad Elshieky

I am sorry. We have to do it. I mean, we all watched the Sex in the City reboot, which is ideal, because you know, I love pain, I guess. Yeah, I mean, I talked about it like few weeks ago, like maybe two episodes ago or something. My main thing was about the comedy concert thing that he keeps saying, which if anyone has ever called it a concert before.

Kiki Monique  32:03

That came up at the birthday party I was at this weekend, someone else brought it up. And I thought immediately of you they were like, why do they keep saying comedy concert? And I was like, I don’t know, ask Mohanad.

Mohanad Elshieky

And the worst part was, I was like, okay, comedy concert is gonna be the height of it. And then you know, it’s gonna get less worse. It kept getting worse. Truly. Because apparently in the Sex and the City universe, Che Diaz is the only comedian in New York City. They keep bringing them up everywhere. And I’m like, what’s happening here?

Atsuko Okatsuka 

So I haven’t seen any of it, not from the beginning, not Sex in the City. Nothing. Okay. Yeah, just been. I’m just poor Atsuko, seeing Che Diaz on Twitter everywhere and I’m trying to figure out I spent like an hour trying to figure it out. And I was like, this is why I hate that show. This is why I fucking, why they fucking remake and my fucking head hurts. I’m so tired. I’m so busy. I’m supposed to be making money. So my grandma, my mom can get a house one day. What the fuck so yeah, I was pissed too. But then when Che Diaz goes as you said, you know the comedian in New York. Is there at least like a host?

Mohanad Elshieky 

There are headliner there. And one of the episodes, they are filming their comedy special on Netflix. Oh, truly, one of the worst thing I’ve ever seen in my life is a TED Talk slash bad comedy. And the people in the crowd. First of all, they had them. They have them standing up. No one was sitting. Which is very common for comedy. Yeah, exactly.

Hoja Lopez

It’s like, it’s basically how can we engineer this to be non-appealing for everyone? How can we make this absolutely not appeal to a single gay, straight, non-binary person? That’s kind of I think the recipe. It’s sort of a hybrid chimera of hell, maybe?

Mohanad Elshieky  34:00

Yeah. The whole set was just like, do not hide, you know, be yourself. That was the whole thing. And I was like, okay, cool. I mean, I agree with the message is just where are the jokes? And they were like, well, yeah, we don’t have any comedy writers on the staff, I guess. So this is what we’re doing. They felt like literally, it felt like someone read the Wikipedia page of stand-up comedy and then explained it to other people. And then those people explained it to the writers. And then they were like, okay, I think I understand what stand-up comedy is.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

No, Mohanad, no, that did not happen. Because they didn’t tell the part where during a special there will be seats. I don’t think even that happened. I don’t even think it was to a Wikipedia.

Mohanad Elshieky

That is true. You know, how bad you have to be for the Joker not to be the worst stand-up comedian anymore. And like, I was like, I watched Che Diaz and I’m like, this is my joker now.

Kiki Monique 

I’m surprise meme hasn’t been made? Or if it has I haven’t seen it yet.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, I truly I just can’t, and it means like, there was like one episode left in this season, and I think in my opinion is that they should, you know, have a realization that standup is not for them. And they should go on to, you know, do other things, write a memoir maybe, I think that would be more like it.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Can we talk about how they always do this to set up folks from marginalized communities, like set them up for failure? Where like, it’s like, they’re having to like, represent, like, not just the whole people, but a whole craft. And it’s just setting them up for failure. Because some people, it’s the first time seeing a stand up, but also the first non-binary stand up that’s watching this show.

Mohanad Elshieky  

Exactly. Yeah, it was basically, you know, like, what the Republic isn’t all tried people imagine liberal comedy is like, and how they make fun of it, even if it’s not true. This is what they did on the show.

Hoja Lopez  36:09

The writing is so weird and clunky for this character. I remember when they got introduced, like the first words that they say are, I’m a queer, non-binary, Mexican, Irish diva. It just feels like the context is weird. And they want to introduce this, like, this emblematic person who represents all areas of like queerness, or non-binary kind of like, sort of life. And instead of choosing one thing that that person actually could be like, instead of choosing a person, they just take the highlights of all these different sort of aspects of queer life and then smudge it onto one person. And of course, they come out as cringy because it’s too much. Like feel like a real cool person, which is who you’re trying to represent.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Yeah, usually we take care of that by having a lineup of different people.

Mohanad Elshieky

They were like, here’s what we have. This lineup has spots for nine white women. And then one spot left, we just have to fucking fill it up with everything.

Kiki Monique 

It’s like when the when that show community when they had to make a mascot, and they were trying to fit everything out. And then it just came out as a blob. It’s like, Che Diaz has become like this blob trying to hold all of these things. And it’s like, not as appealing.

Hoja Lopez 

All that to say is that I think there’s defensive Che there. Like there’s, I’m glad that Che is here. I just, I hope that, you know, we get more characters who are like this that are like happy and at their peak and doing great and that is ultimately what Che is representing is just like a gay person who’s like, fucking doing awesome in their life. And I guess I like that about it.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, I mean, I get it. I mean, like, you know, any ethnicity can be bad at comedy.

Hoja Lopez  38:00

That’s why I believe in women dictatorships and women’s psychopaths because it’s like, we are equal. We should be equally evil.

Atsuko Okatsuka 

Just like gay people can own tigers and go to prison for it, too.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Anyone can be bad.

Kiki Monique 

Except black women, we are perfect.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Now it’s time for my favorite segment that we do every week. Sorry, not sorry, where we either apologize to someone who you wronged or we demand an apology. I’m gonna start with Hoja cuz I feel like you’re usually apologizing. So maybe this week you have someone who would apologize to you? You’re still fucking up?

Hoja Lopez

I’m still fucking up. Well, it’s not really a big fuck up. You know what I mean? But this week, I definitely I put this right next to so you guys would see. I definitely use a puppet of myself in a business meeting. And I just want to let you guys both know that it’s not appropriate. It’s not appropriate in business meetings and this isn’t business for you to use a puppet of yourself to break the ice with new people. Literally used to get right now for you podcast listeners, but you can see it.

Mohanad Elshieky 

yeah, we’ll post a picture of this on.

Hoja Lopez

I’ll give you a little kiss the both of you.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I mean, I mean, I don’t know but I feel like people don’t like it. Maybe that’s a problem with them. And they need to apologize. That’s me.

Kiki Monique 

Do you have ventriloquist skills or are you just like you talk and the puppet talks of the same time?

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, I don’t have a lot of ventriloquist skills. I use the puppet of myself in just dumb stuff on stage. And then also, I’ll use it for like digital stuff, like, you know, like you do magic sequences and videos and then you become a puppet in a puppet world. That’s what she’s here for.

Hoja Lopez 

Just the puppet in a puppet world.

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, a puppet in a puppet world, and she’s living, she’s fucking, she’s dreaming. She’s doing all the things Hillary Duff does in her movies. But yeah, so I do need to apologize to my real corporate world friends.

Mohanad Elshieky  40:13

I don’t think you need to apologize. I think they need to loosen up.

Hoja Lopez 

They need to chill the fuck out.

Mohanad Elshieky

If you’re listening to this fucking chill. Yeah. We’ve been in what like a two-year pandemic now, just chill, just stop. Well, it is what it is. Kiki, so what’s happening this week?

Kiki Monique 

You know, um, I actually have an apology to give to it’s like a terrible apology, more of like a fun apology. But I got invited to a birthday party for someone that it’s like a TikTok friend that I hadn’t met in person. He was having a birthday party. It was a very COVID safe birthday party was outdoors. Everyone had to take a COVID test the day of the party, so very safe. Had a really good time. Beautiful was beautiful up in the hills, gorgeous views. They had a bartender was getting my drink on some beauty influencers got some free beauty products, having a great time. And then I did what I always do, ghost them or Irish goodbye, whatever the term you like to use. It’s what I do. And I just want to apologize to all those really nice people that I met, and just didn’t get contact info and just like left the party, because I don’t know why I do that. Especially when I’m in a new town. You know, this is when you want to meet people, get their info, maybe hang out, but I just ghost, I just call the Uber, don’t tell anyone I’m leaving. And I just ball out, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

Mohanad Elshieky 

You know, also, I feel like one thing that people who listen to this podcast need to know, the way we end every episode is just Kiki out of the blue just logs out.

Hoja Lopez 

And we have to cut that part every time, we have to edit it out.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Every fucking time. And it’s good because sometimes she would like just log out like 15 minutes in and then we’re like, okay, I guess it’s a short episode. Yeah, but no, I get it Kiki. I mean, I do that all the time, too. I just feel like having to say bye to everyone is just so awkward as an adult.

Kiki Monique  42:15

Yeah. It’s so awkward. Like, I don’t you know, I’ve never been a big hugger. So COVID is great because nobody really wants to hug but they’re still just like the acknowledging and saying goodbye. And, you know, I don’t know if it’s like, you know, from childhood from having so many long goodbyes like I don’t know if your families are long good byers, but I felt like I was around a lot of long goodbyes. So now I just get to it and like bye, just out.

Hoja Lopez 

I was a part of the of the tradition that if you didn’t kiss a person on both cheeks before you left, they were automatically angry at you. Like it was like why didn’t you say goodbye to me with my two kisses on my face. Are you specifically upset about something that I said that evening? And it’s like nah, bro, I just left but that is my tradition. My family in Venezuela. Everybody’s like that. So I totally get Irish good buying. It’s a quick, easy way to just get home.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I also would love to know why they called Irish goodbye but that’s just a story for another day.

Kiki Monique 

Yeah, like Is it offensive? I don’t know.

Hoja Lopez 

If you put any nationality race creed in front of a specific thing is probably somewhat offense. Someone out there is like that is rude.

Kiki Monique 

Well, I don’t know. Like I say Mexican Coca Cola. And it’s the best Coca Cola ever. Putting something in front makes it the best. Like don’t just give me Coca Cola only served me Mexican. Yeah, otherwise, I’ll take a beer.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, maybe Irish goodbye is a good thing. Who knows? Maybe the Irish is very efficient when it comes to timeframe,  I don’t have the fucking time man like, like we’ve been trying to Irish goodbye the UK for so long and they will not let us.

Hoja Lopez  44:01

Not let us get out of.

Kiki Monique 

We have the perfect trifecta. Do you also owe apologies this week, Mohanad.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I do not. I never apologize. I am I am a perfect person who lives on this earth among sinners. But I need an apology from my mom. Honestly. For those who don’t know, my mom lives in Libya, so she doesn’t live in the States. And there’s a time difference of maybe like, I think it’s like seven hours or so. But every time she would call me at like 1am and pretends to not know what time it is. This is what she says, oh, I literally thought I was calling you earlier this time. And I’m like, is it earlier in your time? And she’s like, no, I’m like, how do you think this works? Like I’m not sure. You always call me when it’s 1AM, my time so you always call me the same time where you’re at so I’m not sure how you and she’s like, and this is what she does every time she would literally call me. I’m in bed. I am about to go to sleep. And she’s like, you sound tired. Like, yeah, I am. I am. It’s the end of the day. It’s 1AM. And I’m going to sleep and she was like, oh, okay, I had no idea. And then she would go on and talk for 14 minutes.

Kiki Monique 

That’s where the apology is definitely oh, like, okay, I forgive you for the calling. But the continuing on of the conversation now that you’re aware of what time it is, unacceptable.

Mohanad Elshieky 

And she would just not stop talking. She would just go on. And my mom is like, is a school principal. So like she’s at her office. And literally, at some point, I have to sit there and wait while she talks to someone else at the office for the whole conversation. And then she gets back to me and she was like, anyway, what was I saying? I’m like, I have no idea I really haven’t been paying attention. I’m trying to go to sleep and then she just keeps going,

Kiki Monique 

You need to Irish goodbye that phone call the minute she started talking to someone else that would have been like, oh, click, sorry, bad connection. Gotta go.

Mohanad Elshieky  46:01

So yeah, sometimes I would do that. Sometimes I would just be like, Okay, bye. I’m gonna go to sleep. This is going too much. You literally also like complained to me about the same thing yesterday and I’m hearing it like, I’m like, I don’t know if you have a media or something. But we’ve already discussed this.

Hoja Lopez 

Moms are terrible. They make everything sound like an emergency that we need to talk she always sends me messages like I need you to call me. Just this phrase I need you to call me is horrifying, terrifying. Very scary. And then you call and then they’re like, oh, yeah, no, I just wanted to see how you were doing today. And I’m like, mom, I thought you were dying on the side of a road or something happened to my dad or something like that?

Mohanad Elshieky 

And they would always also like sandwich some like either bad news or like weird news in the middle of like nowhere just like usually just there she’s just talking to me and she’s like, so and so died and then changes a subject like you can just say that and just move on. Like stop doing this. It’s so fucking weird. I don’t think she’d ever apologize. But yeah.

Kiki Monique 

No, it’s your mom. Like you’re never going to get an apology and you should miss your mom.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, I guess.

CREDITS

I’M SORRY is a Lemonada Media Original. The show is produced by Alex McOwen, supervising producer is Kryssy Pease. Our executive producers are Stephanie Wittels Wachs and Jessica Cordova Kramer. Our mix is by Kat Yore and theme music was composed by Xander Singh. If you like this show, please rate and review. And please don’t cancel us. You can find out more about our show at @LemonadaMedia on all social platforms, or follow us on Instagram at @imsorry_podcast. We’ll be back next week and until then be nice, play fair and always say I’m sorry. Thanks for listening!