Let’s Go Cartin’ with Phoebe Robinson

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Description

Just when we thought Ku and Su were the queens of adding to cart, in walks writer, producer, actor, and comedian Phoebe Robinson. She introduces a whole new term, “cartin,” teaches Ku and Su that you can actually max out a shopping cart online, and then brings it back to earth with her three picks for the show. Plus, Su tries to slow down and Ku tries to find the source of a long-lasting headache.

Please note, Add To Cart contains mature themes and may not be appropriate for all listeners.

To see all products mentioned in this episode, head to @addtocartpod on Instagram. To read the articles that reference Phoebe’s add to carts, see below.

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Transcript

SPEAKERS

Phoebe Robinson, Kulap Vilaysack, SuChin Pak

SuChin Pak  00:10

Hello, kids, and welcome to another episode of ADD TO CART. Now this is a show about the things we buy, all the ideas we buy into and what it says about who we are. I’m SuChin Pak.

Kulap Vilaysack

And I’m Kulap Vilaysack. This is the second week of our holiday programming. And you know, we’re not just talking about you know, last week with Paul Scheer, we have so many items, but they’re things to add to cart, right, Su? That aren’t just you know, you get pay with your credit card, right, Su?

SuChin Pak 

That’s right, we add to cart things that are in the ether, the things we’re obsessed about. So I’m so excited for our conversation coming up.

Kulap Vilaysack  

Yes, with the illustrious media mogul. That is Phoebe Robinson. But before we get into that, Su, I just want let’s do a check in how’s your week been?

SuChin Pak 

It’s been a really good week. I’ve had a very sort of kid heavy week, and I just want to share this story I’m removing to cart, this version of myself that is always in a rush, even when you don’t need to be in a rush. Like it’s just as my mode of being. It’s also, I realized that, I’m not trying to shift blame here. But Koreans have a word. It’s called Bali, Bali. And that’s just means Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up. And it’s Bali, Bali all the time, it’s said a million different times throughout the day. And I just think it’s this constant hurrying that I’ve been doing, especially as we hurtle towards the end of the year. And so I went to go buy Kai new sneakers for his Halloween costume as […] and we were in vans, and I was trying to stuff his stiff, thin hard foot into a sinker and I’m not going to get into Mike and I’s relationship with my children and their feet. They don’t wear shoes, and I’m just trying to shove this into a very simple van slip on and he’s screaming, it hurts. It hurts. It won’t go in and do I believe him? No. Am I in a rush? Yes. Is there a reason to be rushed? No. But again, just being rushed.

SuChin Pak  02:33

And so he was upset at me and I was like, fine, let’s not buy this sneaker, it’s not for you moved on. Cut to the next day, I was helping him put on his socks. And I noticed that his big toe had swollen to the size of like a cherry tomato. It was black and blue. I had shoved his foot into a shoe so hard that his toe got mangled and bruised. And I have to tell you, Ku. It was just one of those moments where I was like, I fucking flopped that. Like I failed the mission. But a big takeaway there. If I’m not so much in a rush, if I’m just present. I’m not talking about every day because I’m not a monk. But you know, we’re talking if I can pick five moments a day where I can be present with my kids. Maybe I won’t be shoving his foot into a shoe that doesn’t fit. So you know stuff like that has been coming up for me. Look,

Kulap Vilaysack 

We’re gearing up for the holidays as SuChin you know that I think everyone’s not panicked enough. To your point. We are supposed to be enjoy..

SuChin Pak

Who has time to enjoy the holidays. Who has time? I have to get glass pictures from Milan shipped over during a supply chain crisis.

Kulap Vilaysack  04:07

Hold on. Is this tradition Are you always getting glass?

SuChin Pak 

To find the matching glasses that were out of stock? Okay? It looks weird. Let me be honest. When I’m serving water in a glass picture with a glass fish without the glass cups with the glass fish. You know what I mean? Like people are confused.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Oh yes. All the people that are coming through your house.

SuChin Pak 

Let go back to people enjoying the holiday, you are going to go on with the beautiful sentiment before I cut you off.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Well, no, I’m just that I’m trying to figure out to Why have had a headache for a week.

SuChin Pak 

Okay, let’s get into it. What’s going on?

Kulap Vilaysack 

I don’t wnow why. Like, right now, luckily, I feel okay, but it is a rolling headache that is that at this point has been a little over a week. I have a telehealth appointment with my doctor at 3PM today, because I’m just like, this isn’t going away. I’ve never experienced anything like this. It’s the back of my head and it’ll come and go; I’m going to bed and waking up with a headache and then intermittently having it throughout the day. And it’s not sinus. It’s not the front, then I’m like, oh, is it my neck? Is it my neck? So I’ve been using my Asutra, I have been using my Evimerock, I broke open my Evimerock. I’m like, I got to bring in the big boys.

SuChin Pak 

It’s an amazing, amazing healing rock. And all of that to say, though, that you’re still suffering from headaches.

Kulap Vilaysack 

I don’t like headache. It’s a chronic headache. And I think about how you and Claire talk about like some of the migraines that you have. And it was I was like, okay, maybe it’s like a neck thing. I slept on it wrong. But for like it to be this long is a little concerning.

SuChin Pak  06:09

Here we go. Here’s one question. Stress.

Kulap Vilaysack 

And that’s a question my therapist asked. I’m like, I feel fine. Yeah, I’m like, if anything, is it, finally allowing to have feelings? You know, when you like, just like, you push past you got to push through something. And I would say that’s probably what’s been happening. But the last week, two weeks of kind of been like, oh, we’re kind of in a good place. But maybe it’s me actually allowing myself to feel things very possible. I’m such a bowl, I pushed past, I have a high pain tolerance. And so some things I’m like, we’ll feel things later. Let’s put that to the side, let’s maybe but I feel like my sister’s in town. She came in this week. I’m so happy for her to be here.

Kulap Vilaysack 

She’s been here for two months. It’s gonna be so fun. Like, that’s good. You know, these are early days, and I don’t have a lot of answers for people. But we have a surrogate, we are done with legal, we are entering, getting ready to do an embryo transfer. That’s exciting. And that takes a huge load off of me. Huge. I mean, that maybe that’s it. Nothing has been more stressful than that. This whole situation. So to be out of legal to be making plans? It just feels so it’s just really real right now. Maybe it’s that I guess it could just be that, I don’t know, I’m trying to drink a lot of water. But Su, when it when it’s throbbing. It’s like two Advil is not doing, it’s not doing it. So I don’t know.

SuChin Pak 

Yeah, well, you’ve got you’re doing all the things, you’re doing all the things, you’re seeing your doctor. And, you know, I’m a big fan of when it’s that acute you see an acupuncturist? I think acupuncture is great for when you have a very specific acute problem. And Ku, can we get a massage? Be nice. Do you feel comfortable doing that?

Kulap Vilaysack  08:24

Yeah, I think that’s a good idea.

SuChin Pak 

Try that. And if that doesn’t work, then we need to start thinking about what’s in your environment and your diet and all of that. Let’s start there.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Yeah, that’s true. That brings up two things that I have to share. One is an Add to Cart. Which my friend Ava came over last night, she has perfected breadmaking and she brought me this heavy loaf that she cooked in a cast iron pot. It is so delicious. Now, Su, I’ve told you in the past, my doctors have been very clear about me not having any gluten any gluten. But this bread Su, I really wish you were closer.

SuChin Pak 

You know I love bread.

Kulap Vilaysack 

I’m gonna take a photo I just quickly I’m gonna get it real quick. I have to show you this bread.

SuChin Pak 

Listen, we’ve got time for things on this podcast that are very important. Top of that list. Is homemade bread. When someone brings you a loaf. We want to see the picture of it. By the way, share. Here it is. Oh look. It’s wrapped in a bundle like a little […].

Kulap Vilaysack 

I need you to see this bread. I wish you were here with me. Look at this bread. Look at this bread.

SuChin Pak 

Oh my god. That thing is gigantic.

Kulap Vilaysack

And it’s heavy Su, she was gifted a starter at this top of the pandemic. And she has nurtured that starter, that […] starter. And really, truly it’s the best bread I’ve ever tasted.

SuChin Pak  10:07

Giant, this loaf is the biggest loaf of bread I’ve ever seen.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Add to cart this loaf of bread.

SuChin Pak 

I wasn’t going to pick a pinprick in your happy balloon.

Kulap Vilaysack 

I got this last night so this isn’t explain the entirely. Doesn’t help. And the other thing that I want to tell you, because I know I made a lot of fuss about it while you were away. I said that I would start Christmas decorating on the first. At the time of this recording it’s not It’s later than the first and I have not begun.

SuChin Pak 

I see. And I’ve noticed at the beginning of this call you guys, the Zoom. I see her matte black fireplace behind her. There’s not a garland, a wreath, a holly or a fat partridge bird askew on that thing.

Kulap Vilaysack 

I have all those things too.

SuChin Pak 

I have seen all those things. I’ve seen her I mean she’s got groupings of birds just do peppered around the holidays wherever brass birds that bring so much joy and it’s not there.

Kulap Vilaysack 

They’re not up yet. I was out of town. By this week and I promise you at least two trees will be up.

SuChin Pak 

I don’t know much about the holidays and God strike me down here as I’m trying to lecture the holiday queen. But if I know you I know that unless the spirit moves you it’s not worth it. Because that’s the joy in decorating for you. Is the giddiness you feel, the clapping of the feet as you jump around throwing your merry holiday glitter and so if you’re not feeling that you don’t even bother it’s gonna come wait till you’re feeling it then you can enjoy it. I mean, you look forward to this time every year there’s no rush did I just say this remove from cart? I know you […] everybody. There’s a rush.

Kulap Vilaysack  12:31

I do. There isn’t. And look if it happens, say this Friday. It will still be crazy early.

SuChin Pak 

It will be weeks before Turkey hits a table.

Kulap Vilaysack 

I promise you, weeks before will my house will be fully decorated.

SuChin Pak

Tell us if you want to see our annual Instagram Live of Kulap’s decorated house when it goes up. We did it once and that’s why it’s an annual thing.

Kulap Vilaysack

Speaking of doing things one.

SuChin Pak 

Once and never again. You guys just kidding, but also not. This is the last day to enter our Anniversary Giveaway. Oh, my God this box has been such a joy and also an albatross. You have until tonight though today is it, 7PM PST to enter at our Instagram at Add to Cart pod.

Kulap Vilaysack 

You can enter multiple times. And if you don’t know each box has almost $2,000 worth of goodies. And it’s all our favorite goodies. So you know we’ll never turn one again. So you got to enter now and enter a lot.

SuChin Pak 

This is it. It’s your last chance. I mean I’m sending this box out I’m gonna write little notes in there. It’s all our favorite things we’re so excited. Okay, on to the next part of our episode because we have I mean the Queen herself. Truly royalty is among us

Kulap Vilaysack  14:22

Add to Carter’s. This is exciting. Our guest today is a stand-up comedian, writer, producer and actress. She’s a media mogul, a fashion plate a fan of you too. You know her from two Dope Queens. She’s the author of three New York Times bestsellers, including her most recent please don’t sit on my bed in your outside clothes. Check out her HBO Max Comedy Hour Special. Sorry, Harriet Tubman, give it up for the one the only, Phoebe Robinson.

Phoebe Robinson 

Talk about an intro. Oh my gosh. Sounds great. Thank you.

SuChin Pak 

Ret ready to rumble, Phoebe. This is what we do, we just get physical.

Kulap Vilaysack 

It’s what you deserve. Welcome, Phoebe.

Phoebe Robinson 

Thanks for having me, y’all this is I already know this is gonna be fun. I’m like ready to laugh my ass off with the two of you. This is great.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Phoebe, we like to start with asking our guests. What type of shopper are you?

Phoebe Robinson 

Ooh, I’m a person who I love to go cartin’. So my favorite thing is like, either in the morning, or at night, I just put a bunch of stuff in my cart. And then I’ll just keep adding to it until it reaches like the maximum number of things it can hold. And then I’ll go through and pare everything down and then I’ll make the purchase.

SuChin Pak 

Wow. First of all, she called it cartin’ which made me think like this is an extreme sport.

SuChin Pak

She was going cartin’. I was like, you know, she’s a working woman. She’s got a go kart track. That’s what these you know, I mean, it’s been a good year.

Kulap Vilaysack  16:05

But no, she means add to cartin’. And she is thorough. She’s like first glance what do I like? And then I come back. And I really am mindful and mindful about what I purchase.

Phoebe Robinson 

Yes. For example, like on Shopbop. I think the item limit is like 100. So I’ll go all the way up to 100.

Kulap Vilaysack 

By the way, that is a concept. I didn’t know that the first of all, I didn’t know there were limits.

SuChin Pak 

No, I had no idea that shopping carts, what?

Phoebe Robinson 

Yes. Like at a certain point. Shopbop is like bitch like what is happening? Like we got to figure this out. And so are you a bot? Are you a bot like what’s happening? So then I’ll like pare down to like 19 things and I’m like, oh, I only bought 19 things out of 100 that’s really good. It’s like such like psychological bullshit. Just to fool myself into pretending like I wasn’t overspending. It’s so ignorant.

Kulap Vilaysack

Oh, man. I feel I bow down. I really do.

SuChin Pak 

Now, does it take you more time to fill the cart? Or to edit the cart?

Phoebe Robinson 

Oh, I’m just add like, I’m like, Oh, this is cute. This is cute. I’m like, Oh, this will be me in Paris. I’ve only been once for two days. But I’m always like when I’m back in Paris. It’s like bitch what?

Kulap Vilaysack 

Stay ready. You don’t need to get ready.

Phoebe Robinson 

I’m like when I go to Milan. I wear this dress I’ve never been have never been like, never even planned a trip to Milan has never been interested. But I’m like when I’m there. It’s like.

Kulap Vilaysack 

I mean, I like that in my head. Your closet is divided by collections. Travel collections.

SuChin Pak 

Travel collections. Yes. They’re travel collections by Phoebe. Oh my god. That’s an amazing way to arrange a fashion […]

Kulap Vilaysack  18:07

These wedges? From the Maldives.

Phoebe Robinson 

Like this, I’ve got this off the Shopbop this little like friends sweatshirt. I think it’s Levi’s made it and it’s like my favorite sort of like, I’m like, what I go to like, when I go to a cabin. I don’t like going to cabins. I fully hate cabins with a passion. I’m like, but when I’m in a cabin, I got this French […]

Kulap Vilaysack 

I love it. I love that sweat shirt. Number one. Thank you for showing me that flair.

SuChin Pak 

You guys. This sweatshirt is so good. Wait, can I add to cart? You guys. It’s a cream sweatshirt. And then her arm is fringed. So it’s like when she’s not in full, you know, bird mode. Or in full, you know, flex mode. You’re just cash. Yeah, super cash in the cottage. But, you never know when that Milan invitation is going to come. And then you got to leave the cottage guys.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Well, I can’t wait to see what add to carts you’ve brought to us. Oh, and let’s go with the first one. Oh, I like this. Okay, you’re not just bringing items. You’re not just unloading your Shopbop cart right now. You are this is bigger. This is about life. Please, tell us about compassionate detachment.

Phoebe Robinson

So this is something I’ve been working on because as a person who has employees like I think when I first started to have like, growing a company I was very much like we’re family and we’re all this and all that and I’ve been in therapy for years. just sort of like, an do that habit of like, no, like, I told my therapist this and she was like, y’all are not a family. And I was like, but like we’re like cozy, but she say they are not related to you. You guys are not related by marriage. This is not how you run a business. And so I had to, I’ve been like working on sort of, like, removing sort of, I don’t see the personal but knowing when to compartmentalize emotions in order to do the most effective job and to be the best leader to my employees and to be the best boss for myself. And so I’ve had to be able to learn how to like, empathize without being like, Oh, I have to take this on personally. And I don’t know if it’s like a Libra thing. I don’t know what it is. But I think I’m just like, I like to encourage and nurture and do all those things. But yeah, I have to learn how to have boundaries and not be like, this is like not a professional environment.

Kulap Vilaysack  20:58

Yeah, yes. Okay. So let’s talk about, you mentioned you have employees that you have tiny reparations, can you tell the people who don’t know what that is?

Phoebe Robinson 

It is a production company, which I’m very excited about. And we’re producing comedies, we want to get into the one-hour drama space, down line, we love to do movies, but we really just wanted to have a place for women, people of color people in the queer community to really like celebrate their stories, and not sort of live in this trauma spaces. I feel like so often, like anytime is it starving people colors just like let’s talk about the sad shit. And I’m like no, and we’re not doing that here. There’s enough sadness out there me to have some joy. We didn’t have some like uplifting stuff. There. So there’s so much all of our lives that’s not tied to like, oh, white people could be mean to me sometimes. Like I just don’t want that, you know what I mean not to, to minimize what that those kinds of storytelling stuff is. But it’s just like, not what I’m interested in. And yeah, we’ve been around for two and a half years at this point. It’s really exciting. It’s been good. Got some stuff in development and everything.

Kulap Vilaysack  22:10

I mean, yes, that’s so exciting. You’ve got shows that you’re starring in coming up. But isn’t there also a literary arm of it, too?

Phoebe Robinson

Yes. That’s called tiny reparations books. Okay, excuse me. Which is really exciting.

Kulap Vilaysack 

That’s another department. You got to let her know which hallway you know, we’re going down.

Phoebe Robinson 

It’s the same thing as the production company. All the I think all the authors on our slate, our debut authors is really exciting. And I think it’s really important to me, because I know in 2015 how hard it was when I was shopping around my book where people were just straight up being like, oh, no one’s gonna buy this. You’re a black woman. This is like not relatable, this won’t sell. And so I really wanted this imprint to be a place where I hate saying, oh, I’m taking a chance on somebody I’m not taking a chance. I’m just recognizing someone’s talent and being like, can I jump aboard this train before you like take off? We have a book I’m so excited about Netflix option the rights. It’s called Portrait of A Thief by Grace D. Li. And she’s amazing. She’s a medical school while she wrote this, this is how talented this woman is. And it’s about 520 something Chinese Americans who are hired to steal Chinese artwork from American museums and bring it back to China and it is fun of page turner it has like the oceans up like 11 where you’re like oh my god what’s gonna happen but then there’s like all this like heart to it and the characters are so well thought out. I am so obsessed with this book and that comes out in April 2022.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Phoebe, my goodness so exciting.

Phoebe Robinson 

I was like trying to get in there with like my little like you know 25 cents and Netflix was like, backup bitch and then they came in with all like sacks of money and I was like okay, bye, bye.

Kulap Vilaysack  24:13

Yeah, receive, receive, but that makes sense to go back to what you added to cart which is compassionate detachment which is what you know with our backgrounds how do we because Phoebe you’re scaling up scaling up, so how can you be.. Your cartin’, all quadrants of your life your cartin’. So yeah, like how do you healthfully run this company with integrity? Like stays true to your own integrity and who you are. And this is a I think a key

Phoebe Robinson 

Yeah, absolutely. You know, like who you start as a performer, you started doing anything where it’s sort of you’re getting audience feedback you know what I mean? whether you intend to or not, there’s some part of this sort of resorbs that like, Oh, I hope like everyone, like walks away liking me, right? But that you can’t take that into the workplace because you’re not going to make the best decisions for your company, or for anyone else or for yourself. And so I have to like sort of be like, except that there are going to be moments where my employees are not going to like me, and I just need to get over it. It’s also not my business, if they’re not feeling me at the moment. Like, they’re to feel what they want to feel. And I need to stay focused on like, what I can actually control and what is professional instead of sort of like being like, oh, I don’t want to say this thing. Or I don’t want to do this thing. Or, oh, this thing happened. I should like overextend myself. It’s like, no, no, no, just keep it neutral as possible,

SuChin Pak 

That fits in every aspect, by the way, because I’m just listening to you. And I’m thinking, I should probably bring some of that into my parenting as well. You know, who, boy, you know, just detach a little, you know, have some boundaries, you know, take care of yourself. Don’t be responsible for everyone else’s feelings, you know?

Phoebe Robinson  26:10

How old are your kids?

SuChin Pak 

So my son is 9, and he’s going on 4. And my daughter is seven. And she’s going on, like, 48, on her third pack of, you know, Newports. They’re two completely different unicorns. And they come out of the room out the gate in the morning this morning. It was just immediately they go right into their brand. And whether you’re at work or at home, not to be like, oh, right, your emotions aren’t my responsibility to fix. I can just make toast. Just butter the bread.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Phoebe, what is lonely at the top?

SuChin Pak 

Yeah, what is that? Let me click on that.

Phoebe Robinson

So it’s this video that this guy, his name is Speedy Romeo, I think and he was a host of that. Gosh, Rose I shot HBO Max about the streetwear competition, I think it is called the Hype or something like that. I would get super obsessed with that show. Cuz I love streetwear even though I don’t think I can pull it off. I love to watch other cool people wearing super cool things. And he was he was on like some radio interview, he was just sort of talking about how like, as you are sort of like ascending in your career, it gets lonely or you have less people around you.  And I was just like, oh, that’s so fascinating. It’s like, it’s like, it’s not necessarily how I feel. But it’s just was something sort of just kind of like think about and just sort of be like, wow, you know what I mean?

Kulap Vilaysack  28:27

Like, I just associate what we’ve been through in this pandemic. It’s just very isolating and lonely. And I’m trying to think, because the thing that I want to do is for us all to be vaccinated so we can be in so many rooms together and Phoebe maybe not have boundaries. If I’m being honest, I’m so hungry. But part of me goes yeah, it does make sense that there would haw back at you could be lonely at the top. But then part of me in a Virgo way thinks it’s about like, oh, you know, like you said when we’re coming up in comedy, we’re with a bunch of people. And then as you get older, it sort of pairs down to the people that matter hopefully, right and then relationships evolve. But hopefully you’re coming up with a group of people of like-minded and driven folk that like you know, you all are royalty tending to your various kingdoms, and you can support one another.

Phoebe Robinson 

Oh, I love that loyalty to your various kingdoms. That sounds great. But no, like when I saw that, like that clip. It just made me think about someone like a Lady Gaga, right? It’s like for the rest of her life. Like, how is she ever going to truly know? Like when someone is meeting her, if there’s no ulterior motive, and that’s the sort of thing is like how do you navigate your life? If we you achieve, or you don’t even have to be as successful as Lady Gaga, you could be like, I don’t know, like an influencer or like, have your own company or like, whatever. But like, how can you ever trust like someone else’s like motives. And that’s always like, a scary thing to sort of like think about, especially as a woman, because you’re just sort of like, who’s here, it’s already hard enough to be a woman. It’s very hard to be a woman of color. And then like, add that until we like get older and your careers like, do the things you want to do like how, like, I don’t know, like, how can you be sure? And I guess the answer is, you can’t be sure. But that’s tough.

SuChin Pak  30:37

This is why I’m all for going full hermit. You know, I just, that I have no interest in people, the older I get, and it’s harder and harder to […] that interest. Really. Anyway, that took a dark turn.

Phoebe Robinson 

No, no, that’s interesting. That is so you, are you like, do you feel like you have as you gotten older, you have had sort of pare down the people who are in your circle.

SuChin Pak

I think it’s pared down. I think it’s this, because I was thinking about what you were saying and how that’s relatable. I think as you even get older, you know, because you A have less energy, and B you just have more on your plate. But I think also to Phoebe and correct me if I’m wrong, because I think we’ve all been around. And we’ve all done this for so long. We’ve seen people rise and fall in their careers and it does get lonely I think when you do, when you are on the rise or when you achieve a certain thing, because even as a friend, it’s like you can’t help even kind of changing how you feel. And you’re like, wait, what is I mean, I’ve had friends like that I’ve had for years and years. And then you know, overnight or over some time you’re like, oh, this looks like a different birthday party that it was two years ago. Oh my god, that’s amazing. The Margarita stand, you know, like, okay, I guess there’s an elephant, you know? And so you’re in the middle of a Moroccan desert theme, you know, party and, and I just even watching it. I’m like, I don’t know, like, am I laughing a little bit louder. Am I you know, when my feeling a little certain way about some? And if I’m doubting that, I can’t even imagine what that person as they look around it. Yeah, yeah, this is great. But like, how many of these people are so genuine, which is why? You know, you just got to have I always say just gotta have like, three, three, just like good. Just, that’s it.

Phoebe Robinson  32:48

Yeah, that was good. I’m taking mental notes.

Kulap Vilaysack 

We are really diving deep, guys.

SuChin Pak 

All I can think about is Shopbop 100. I keep thinking, wait.

Kulap Vilaysack 

I am also thinking about cart limits. I didn’t wasn’t aware till now. Phoebe, you contain multitudes. Including this revolutionary idea. parallel play, parallel play?

Phoebe Robinson 

So I didn’t even realize I was doing that until I saw this New York Times article, but Bae and I you know quarantining with this significant other for so long. You are like, I want to be around you. But I legitimately do not want to talk to you. But we can be in the same room doing separate things. And that also counts as spending time together. And I think it’s something that like, pre COVID or been like, oh, there’s a sign about your relationship not being great. But now it’s like, your relationship is not going to survive if you don’t have moments where you’re mad each other not talking. And it’s great. I love it.

SuChin Pak  34:04

This may reframe my entire marriage. I just want to tell you, Phoebe, I cannot wait to read this article. I mean, every I’m like tingling. Like this is exactly how I exist. In all of my relationships. That’s how I want all I want you to come over. I don’t want you to talk to me. And I want you to sit I want to serve you things as they inspire me, tea’s biscuits, socks, and I want you to do your thing. And I want me to do my thing. And then every once now we’ll be like, oh wait, remember that friend of ours. Oh my god. And then we go back to doing our thing, that to me is harmony, that to me is relationship bliss.

Phoebe Robinson 

It’s great. Like he would play his video games and I would be watching like Real Housewives of Potomac. And it was like, perfect. Like we were in the same room. He was in bed. We were both And then and it was great. It was like a great two hours.

Kulap Vilaysack 

It’s a really parallel play is just we are in the room together doing your own things, but we are harmoniously in concert, no, that’s not the way to put it what’s the quick way to put it?

Phoebe Robinson 

It’s like your energy like, you’re quote unquote spending time together, but it’s in a less sort of, like, intense way because like, so many times, you’d be like, what do you want to watch? Well, I want to watch this. No, I want to watch that, I want so it’s like, if he’s super into NCIS I will never watch that show. I will never watch it.

SuChin Pak 

How have you survived this long with a partner who’s been to NCIS, my goodness, that is a deep deep abiding love.

Phoebe Robinson 

Su, this is the truety so he, he works with musicians. So he was on tour, or like end of August or end of July to like October. He started watching NCIS during that time, and is now season six. Like this isn’t like he’s watched from the beginning. He just would one day we’re on FaceTime. He’s like, you know, I think I’m gonna start NCIS and I’m like, that shows been on the air for 20 years. And he was like, I think I could do it. And I was like, what, he’s on season six now.

Kulap Vilaysack  36:20

Yeah, guys, that’s a Scott Aukerman with Star Trek, which I’m not saying it’s like I drop in it’s a fine show. It’s just, where are we now? Are we Deep Space Nine?

SuChin Pak 

Wild to watch your partner just dropped down that deeper level? Front row, that’s a Yeah, that’s parallel plates.

Kulap Vilaysack

Oh, you’re watching your space stories. I’m gonna head back over here. I like to do something over there. Phoebe, thank you so much for joining us. I know you are Phoebe Robinson on everything right. For your socials?

Phoebe Robinson 

@DopeQueenPheebs, Yes.

Kulap Vilaysack 

When do you do the hot men post?

Phoebe Robinson 

Thirsty Thursday. I’m so inconsistent with the app to get back on track because I do love just talking about hot dudes I could never ever bag.

Kulap Vilaysack

The sexiest photos with the most hilariously accurate commentary. It’s truly the best thing ever. Like, you have like I was like well, Phoebe, you’re right. Like Chris Evans in those corduroys, boy yo, yo, boy, yo, yo, yo.

SuChin Pak

She must be really into it.

Kulap Vilaysack 

That’s my boner looking at his junk.

SuChin Pak  38:03

We what that was. I didn’t know. Yeah, but thank you.

Phoebe Robinson 

Thank you for having me. This has been the best hang. I love this so much. Thank you so much.

Kulap Vilaysack 

Okay, that’s it for our show. As always find everything on at @AddToCartPod. You can also leave us a message at 833-453-6662.

SuChin Pak 

We will catch you all next week.

CREDITS

ADD TO CART is a production of Lemonada Media. Our producer is Claire Jones and our editor is Ivan Kuraev. The music is by Wasahhbii and produced by La Made It and Oh So Familiar with additional music by APM music. Executive producers are Kulap Vilaysack, SuChin Pak, Jessica Cordova Kramer and Stephanie Wittels Wachs. Be sure to check out all the items we mentioned today on our Instagram at @AddToCartPod. Also, please take a moment to rate, review, and subscribe to the show wherever you get your podcast.

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