The Cookie Man with Jim Mulvaney
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Nobody brings the party quite like the man who raised this gal. And my dad doesn’t disappoint, showing up with homemade cookies in hand and stories galore. Tune in to hear his tales of running into Stevie Nicks and unwittingly fueling my expensive taste, and see just how many times he lovingly glances at my stepmom off camera. Jim’s also got his share of musical moments, because my dad is nothing if not an entertainer. Seems like I’ve got a little competition.
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Transcript
SPEAKERS
Caller, Dylan Mulvaney, James Mulvaney, Jr, Lemonada
Dylan Mulvaney 01:31
Welcome back to The Dylan Hour. I’m your host, Dylan Mulvaney, and today we are really starting at the very beginning, because we’re sitting down with someone who quite literally helped bring me into this world, I would like to give him a proper introduction, but I still don’t quite know what he does for work, but I am very excited to share my father, James Francis Mulvaney, Jr.
James Mulvaney, Jr 01:59
Good to be here. Thank you for the introduction.
Dylan Mulvaney 02:01
You ever been on a podcast before?
James Mulvaney, Jr 02:03
I never have.
Dylan Mulvaney 02:03
Oh, wow. Well, actually, I was gonna say we’re taking your podcast virginity, and that’s on theme with our very special drink for the day, which is if you’ll grab your drink, dad. This is a virgin White Russian. It’s also known as milk, yes, so this is milk. And I think this is going to be very hot take, but I love milk. I like drinking milk, but I only like drinking milk with ice.
James Mulvaney, Jr 02:30
Oh, me too. I wonder what that you must have gotten that one.
Dylan Mulvaney 02:33
Apple falls from the tree on that one, some people are really weird about drinking milk. But is it, is it because of your cookies that you love milk? Or is, Did you always know I always love milk? It’s also amazing, because we have a snack here at the show. Would you grab them for us?. So he is known. You gotta talk to the mic, though, dad. So these are my cookies, my dad’s cookies.
James Mulvaney, Jr 02:58
I am famous for those in San Diego, they call me the cookie man. Yeah, they do. And I call them either crack cookies, or, let’s see this kitchen sink.
Dylan Mulvaney 03:08
How many do you make a week?
James Mulvaney, Jr 03:09
About 500 and I’m basically addicted to making cookies.
Dylan Mulvaney 03:13
And you don’t sell them.
James Mulvaney, Jr 03:15
I give them away, give them clients and friends and anybody that I see.
Dylan Mulvaney 03:19
And the presentation is always the Costco paper plate, and honey, you don’t need anything more than that, because the cookies are that good. Let’s sit them between us. You might I haven’t eat much today. Could I have a cookie?
James Mulvaney, Jr 03:30
Please.
Dylan Mulvaney 03:30
So let’s do first taste on this cookie. Now that takes me back to childhood. I really can’t remember a time in my life when you didn’t make them.
James Mulvaney, Jr 03:41
Oh, I pretty much started when you were born.
Dylan Mulvaney 03:45
You got to talk into the mic, though. Okay, it’s gonna be a theme of this episode. Um, you look at that. It’s right here, honey. Though, don’t look at the don’t look at there. Okay, look at me.
James Mulvaney, Jr 03:55
Look at you. Yeah, you’re beautiful.
Dylan Mulvaney 03:57
Thanks so much.
James Mulvaney, Jr 03:59
I got off booze and coke drugs 24 years ago, and basically because you were born, and I wanted to be a better dad.
Dylan Mulvaney 04:12
And then you started making cookies.
James Mulvaney, Jr 04:13
Because of making cookies because of that. And I just What else do you think you’re addicted to in life? Wow. Jennifer, my wife.
Dylan Mulvaney 04:23
She’s in my beautiful stepmom, is in the room with us.
James Mulvaney, Jr 04:25
Yes, uh, I’m addicted to, uh, scuba diving and snorkeling and Bora. Bora, honey. I’m leaving next week for for another month. I love to dance, so that’s an addiction. I would say.
Dylan Mulvaney 04:38
I’ve gotten some different I’m addicted to shopping, which I think you are actually allergic to. And story time is that my dad you what’s your favorite store in the world? Costco? Thought so. And my dad, like you, can pretty much get anything in the Costco shopping cart if you’re quick enough, because he’s in and out in about four minutes. And Costco is a pretty big store. But if you can, if you can make it in the basket, he’ll buy it for you. But then around Christmas time, can you explain our Christmas situation?
James Mulvaney, Jr 05:07
Well, with you, it was kind of fun, because you’d make a list everything you wanted, and you’d tell me the store to go to, and I’d walk into, you know, some lush cosmetics, or Bloomingdale’s, or Nordstrom someplace, and then I would ask for one of the folks that works there, and they’d come up and they’d go, you’re Dylan’s dad. And I said, Yes, here’s everything that Dylan wanted. And you know how to color coordinate. Pretty fun.
Dylan Mulvaney 05:35
Because if I didn’t do that for you and get it, I would have gotten ski goggles from Costco, and I hadn’t been skiing in eight years, but I still got those. He still got the goggles.
James Mulvaney, Jr 05:43
Oh, come on. Now, that was because there were $50 and I wanted a pair, and I just got you a pair, just in case. Well, right? So what you wanted to snow, ski, which you did do, and you’re still doing, but now you’ve got the pink ones.
Dylan Mulvaney 05:57
But I feel like you’ve brought me into, you know, certain worlds of, you know, sports and Catholicism, and I brought you into department stores and Broadway.
James Mulvaney, Jr 06:06
Musicals and.
Dylan Mulvaney 06:07
Oh yeah. Was that? Was that a thing in your life before?
James Mulvaney, Jr 06:10
Oh no, never. But once you got involved and you were in the Grinch Stole Christmas at the Old Globe. That was just so, so much.
Dylan Mulvaney 06:17
The Times, right?
James Mulvaney, Jr 06:18
Every night I go.
Dylan Mulvaney 06:19
Those were the days us going to the Grinch at the old blue dad.
James Mulvaney, Jr 06:24
Who loves Christmas?
Dylan Mulvaney 06:28
So dad here at the Dylan hour, we like to do a bitter and sweet of the week. My sweets already very sweet because I’m eating a cookie. But what’s your bitter and sweet of the week?
James Mulvaney, Jr 06:36
Ooh, okay. Well, the bitter and my uncle Ray, who is 98 years old. My mother’s brother was, is getting to the end of his life. And yep, he’s we love you, Uncle Ray. Oh, good man. And and then the the sweet is, I just got 19 years of sobriety, high five? Yeah, I want you to give me my 20 year. And that’s that’s a big deal, because without that, I wouldn’t be here today. I wouldn’t have you as my beautiful daughter.
Dylan Mulvaney 07:11
And what’s been the hardest part of sobriety, would you say?
James Mulvaney, Jr 07:14
Probably, when I’m out to dinner, not having a glass of some Cabernet or something of that nature, that and then it seems as though sometimes you’re left out because people don’t want to party hard. Yeah, they want to party harder, and they don’t. You don’t drink, so.
Dylan Mulvaney 07:30
You’re just as fun, if not funner.
James Mulvaney, Jr 07:32
Oh yeah. Except for crazy, I can go to bed at nine o’clock now.
Dylan Mulvaney 07:36
You do be going to bed at night.
James Mulvaney, Jr 07:38
We’re going out tonight. I’m thinking, oh boy, but we’ll get it figured out and but just life is so much easier now, and it’s just really been a because we still have cookies and milk. We still have cookies and milk, and I’ve got you, and I’m so proud of you, and the fact what you’ve been able to do, which is just incredible, you’re such a great example of somebody that loves people and loves doing what they’re doing.
Dylan Mulvaney 08:04
And dad, well, I think my let’s see what my suite of the week is that I’m about to take you tonight to our first big Hollywood premiere, and we’re going to see, yeah, Honey, we’re going, Well see about that, honey.
James Mulvaney, Jr 08:20
Oh, come on.
Dylan Mulvaney 08:21
We’re going to the premiere of will and Harper on Netflix, which is Will Ferrell. And I know you’re, you’re a fan of his, right? Big, okay, good. And I just You always say you’d like to go to an event like this, so I’m down. We’re going to do it. But my bitter is that I’m already preemptively, a little nervous about what you’re gonna say to people.
James Mulvaney, Jr 08:42
Oh, I don’t blame you.
Dylan Mulvaney 08:44
So let’s practice this.
James Mulvaney, Jr 08:45
Okay, yes.
Dylan Mulvaney 08:46
When somebody says so, Jim, what do you think of the movie?
James Mulvaney, Jr 08:51
Was beautiful. It was something that moved me.
Dylan Mulvaney 08:54
Oh, good, excellent. Oh, what’s it like being Dylan’s dad?
James Mulvaney, Jr 09:00
Oh, I’m the most special dad in the world. There you are. I can’t tell you how many times every day I was in at a meeting this morning on my way up in Escondido, and I was talking to these two gals that have a business. And I asked the one if, because I always ask everybody if they know you, and you know this cow didn’t know you. And that was amazing. Well, then her the other nurse came in. She found out I was said, I said I was Dylan’s dad. She went nuts. She just couldn’t believe the fact that I was Dylan. I get people asking to take pictures with me all the time. Because I’m Dylan’s dad.
Dylan Mulvaney 09:40
Shit. I wish I was Dylan’s dad. That sounds like an easier gig, but what do you what do you do?
James Mulvaney, Jr 09:47
Well, I’ve been in insurance for 40 years, and what I do is a little different than most insurance people. I I’m more of just a rain maker. I go out and get the business. Rain on us, baby. I do it. And I shake a lot of hands. And you know what I say about ass?
Dylan Mulvaney 10:05
I say you do a lot of golf, you play a lot of golf, and you go to a lot of lunches.
James Mulvaney, Jr 10:09
Lot of Mr. A’s.
Dylan Mulvaney 10:10
Yes, they’re very good. I think they’re getting some ASMR right now with this cookie situation. And be eating it so vibrantly, you might be you’re definitely the first insurance person on the show might be the only one, depending on where we take this maybe, I don’t know, it could become an insurance podcast Massachusetts mutual. Do you recommend insurance to those of us watching or listening?
James Mulvaney, Jr 10:32
Not really. I let people know that that’s what I do. And if they have interest, they ask me nothing worse than a pesky and the shirt, The Music Man, the worst. I’ve seen too many of them and.
Dylan Mulvaney 10:45
Well, I think a big thing that I learned from you is actually networking. And I think that you know how to talk to basically anyone. Where did that part of you come from?
James Mulvaney, Jr 10:55
Well, kind of a chameleon. I get that from James Francis Mulvaney senior, who passed away about 10 years ago, your grandfather. He was one of the great networkers. I used to watch him at the baseball park. He was president of the San Diego Padres in the Pacific Coast League. And he’d walk up and down the aisles and he’d shake hands with everybody. There anyone at the baseball everybody. And I just want to sit there and go. I want to be just like my dad and and that’s kind of where I’ve never met a stranger. I look, you know, I’m already well, I introduced myself in elevator. So people think I’m kind of weird, but you know that.
Dylan Mulvaney 11:34
Now you hand out cookies along, yeah, that’s part of the deal. That’s my cookies.
Dylan Mulvaney 11:39
I sometimes feel weird when we’re like, on a beach and who walks up to like a hot mom with a kid and just offers the kid a cookie, and she’s like, What the fuck are you trying to offer my kid right now? Is it? You know? Because they kind of do look like hot strangers, strangers. They give pot vibes. Oh, God, I’ve had to tell people I went to Betty forward, so, but I will say, if people still indulge, they can do that and then eat them, and they’ll still really enjoy them.
James Mulvaney, Jr 12:02
Oh, yeah, the world’s greatest chocolate chip cookie and.
Dylan Mulvaney 12:06
But you spend a lot on macadamia nuts every year.
James Mulvaney, Jr 12:08
I spend over I write off over $10,000 a year in cookie material, and.
Dylan Mulvaney 12:13
A lot of those are macadamia nuts. Those prices are just being vouch for those of us at the Dylan hour who aren’t aware justice for macadamia nut prices. And what you do something very special with the the cookies, which is you put your own kind of ingredient into it that you make.
James Mulvaney, Jr 12:29
I go to Bora, Bora, I was saying, twice a year, and I bring home my own vanilla beans, then I stuff them in in spiced rum, which is Captain Morgan’s. And it’s funny because every time I leave Costco with one of those, I usually run into somebody in my program, and they’re like, Jim, what’s the Captain Morgan’s going home with you for? But then I have to explain, I make my own vanilla. And it’s.
Dylan Mulvaney 12:54
That’s one of the secrets of.
James Mulvaney, Jr 12:56
Secret ingredients is, and people you’ve written that you kind of just eyeball it every time, right?
James Mulvaney, Jr 13:02
You were, we talked about giving out my recipe, but I’d be glad to, but it’s all right up in here, so anybody would like they’d have to come over to the house and watch me make them something.
Dylan Mulvaney 13:11
Well, I’m that’s a that’s a big invite, because who knows when and how many are going to show up.
James Mulvaney, Jr 13:17
You know who wanted to see? It was your friend that the Wilson.
Dylan Mulvaney 13:21
Carney Wilson, from the Wilson and Phillips band, when we want it?
James Mulvaney, Jr 13:25
Yep, she wants to.
Dylan Mulvaney 13:26
Well, Carney Wilson, you and the internet have been invited to my house. Well, not my house, my dad’s house, because.
James Mulvaney, Jr 13:32
Alpine California.
Dylan Mulvaney 13:34
Far away.
James Mulvaney, Jr 13:35
I know it’s where you were born. Well, okay, come back.
Dylan Mulvaney 13:39
Let’s go back to the origin, we’re from San Diego, California. How would you explain San Diego?
James Mulvaney, Jr 13:45
Well, it’s a beach town. I grew up in Pacific Beach, La Jolla, and then I just got around San Diego because of, you know, I was a messenger for a company when I was very young. But how would I explain San Diego? Kick back the waves are good. You know, the the football and baseball team don’t attract anybody.
James Mulvaney, Jr 14:06
I’m sorry.
Dylan Mulvaney 14:06
The conservative la like, it’s like a the farther away from the beach you get, the more that they don’t like gay people, but that you’re a testament to the fact that that’s not true, because you moved really far from the beach, you do like gay people. Now, if you just stop calling me every time you meet a gay person and say, Hey, do you know this person? I say, No, Dad, no, that’s not. And now we shifted now from that. Now it’s if you do meet a trans person, it’s hey, you know this trans person?
Dylan Mulvaney 14:07
No, I love it.
James Mulvaney, Jr 14:08
I just think it’s something that I’m proud of, and I it’s never going to go away. And I’m just blessed that I have you in my life such a good, good influence on so many people, and you’re full of joy. What bothers me sometimes is when the person asks me, she’s not real, is she This is fake, isn’t it? You’re like.
Dylan Mulvaney 14:53
Yeah, she’s a bitch. She gave me the middle finger when she was six, and I’ve been mad […]
James Mulvaney, Jr 15:00
When you were five, we’d go to the pool and I’d throw you up.
Dylan Mulvaney 15:04
Speaking of on a little blast from the past, I have some pictures of us.
James Mulvaney, Jr 15:07
Well, then you take bows to the crowd and and, you know, everybody was like, she’s gonna be so famous though, I think you got.
Dylan Mulvaney 15:16
I got sung by a bee that day. Well, that was probably the before bee sting. Here’s you that looks like a pool throw, but that was pre pool. And then I think there’s some sort of saying that.
James Mulvaney, Jr 15:29
I think it’s up maybe in, up in.
Dylan Mulvaney 15:32
Is that you in there? That’s me.
James Mulvaney, Jr 15:35
I think it might have been up in Eureka, not Eureka, but reading California with your mother’s father’s mom and dad’s place, but seen that one.
Dylan Mulvaney 15:45
But so I grew up in a very tiny town of San Diego called Alpine, I mean, it’s very small, right?
James Mulvaney, Jr 15:53
It’s getting a little bigger, but not much.
Dylan Mulvaney 15:55
And you know, you would sing in the choir. We go to church at Queens.
James Mulvaney, Jr 16:01
Oh God, beyond my walls, beyond my fears.
Dylan Mulvaney 16:07
That was great. And you just so I do think maybe I got the singing from you.
James Mulvaney, Jr 16:13
Little bit.
Dylan Mulvaney 16:14
And as far as, like, you grew up very Catholic.
James Mulvaney, Jr 16:18
Yeah, but, you know, I’d rather surf than go to church. So we ditched a lot. And, you know, I.
Dylan Mulvaney 16:23
Big family.
James Mulvaney, Jr 16:24
Big family. There’s seven of us. I’m number five, and I don’t try at all. That’s my line. But I got Jim Jr, which was a real, real pleasure.
Dylan Mulvaney 16:31
They saved that one for you.
James Mulvaney, Jr 16:33
No, Melinda was first, the Tom and Bob the twins. Larry third, my brother, my father’s brother, had a son named that. He named Jim after my father. So my father was obligated to name his next son, Larry. And then along came Jimmy, and then David and Brian.
Dylan Mulvaney 16:51
You got a song for everything. My favorite thing, my best friend, Lily, who will be on the pod, is your she walks in the room and go do it. Lily, do the shampoo. And I’ve refused to believe that this is a real song that exists.
James Mulvaney, Jr 17:06
It’s an old, old song.
Dylan Mulvaney 17:08
You can give this man like anything, and he will find a song for it.
James Mulvaney, Jr 17:12
Until Lily, I’m not happy with her. She’s not returning my phone call.
Dylan Mulvaney 17:15
Same girl, same you do, but it is what I’ve loved too, is you’ve now developed friendships with my friends. You know, you look they’re like your kids.
James Mulvaney, Jr 17:23
Oh yeah, they love my we just were in Scotland, and it was so fun to be with them all and.
Dylan Mulvaney 17:28
Well, I got to tell you that you came to visit. And sometimes I think because growing up, you know, queer and trans, especially, you know, coming out to you all, I felt really guilty about making you, you know, call me your daughter, or call me a woman, or she, and I think that there was part of me that wanted to pull away a little bit from the family, because it, just I felt like I would start to shut down and sometimes I get, I think I get anxiety. Sometimes having family around, just because I feel like I have to, you know, I want to make sure you’re taken care of. And I got, you know, I was at work, but you came to visit. It was so funny because, like, the first day you can’t, you know, came, and I’m, like, doing this one woman show, getting her and I’m a little anxious, but excited to see you. And then by the I remember the last day we went to Glasgow, I had a fitting for a TV show, and then we went to this musical together, and by the end, I was like, oh my god, this is my best friend. And so I did want to tell you that you you’ve been calling me your best friend for a long time, forever, but you officially are. You’re on best friend level here. And I do think it’s really cool when you as a kid, then finally see a parent as like, as a friend and as a human because I think for a long time, you know, like the dynamics are tricky, because you know you’re the Well, you never really reprimanded me that much, but I think that I had trouble seeing you as an equal human being, and because you were always this father figure. And now I’m like, oh, this is the coolest person in the world.
James Mulvaney, Jr 19:04
Well, you’re much brighter than me. I’ve got a as good, if not a better personality sometimes, but.
Dylan Mulvaney 19:11
Yeah, drag me bitch. Drag Me Jimmy.
James Mulvaney, Jr 19:14
Oh, you’re the best. But I, what I don’t understand is, with a lot of these haters out there, they.
Dylan Mulvaney 19:20
Speak on it.
James Mulvaney, Jr 19:21
When they when they want to tell you something, and you’re just kind of you just like, Are you paying, are you paying their bills? Are you why did? Why do they have to give a shit about you know what you’re.
Dylan Mulvaney 19:33
Well, you are on you’re only having Instagram to follow me correct. Okay, so you’ve got like, one follower.
James Mulvaney, Jr 19:39
That’s it. Now, if I ever went on it, I’d have 1000s.
Dylan Mulvaney 19:43
Would be your opportunity. But I don’t know if we want to really open that up. And what is, what’s it been like for you to watch me kind of get blown up in this, you know, like the positives of it and the negatives.
James Mulvaney, Jr 19:59
The positive is, I’ve never been prouder in my life about anybody and anybody that I’ve been around. The negatives are having the assholes coming up to me and asking me, you know, is she she had a sex change or issue this and that? And I what my comment is, well, it’s none of my business, so it’s obviously none of your business.
Dylan Mulvaney 20:19
How crazy to think that people feel comfortable enough to walk up to someone’s parent and be like, so what’s going on down there? You know, that’s like, actually, really disgusting.
James Mulvaney, Jr 20:29
It is disgusting, and it’s only, it’s usually just the macho male that does that. No female is, I think they, I can’t remember a female doing it, but you know.
Dylan Mulvaney 20:42
A woman, you know, not wanting to objectify another woman, but have you found that your, you know, friends and community and family have, like, kind of been supportive of me?
James Mulvaney, Jr 20:56
Very much so, and if they’re not, then they’re gonna have the wrath of Jimmy here. And that’s not a pretty thing, but yeah, no, my Rotarians, the women in my rotary, want to know what you’re doing all the time. They want to know what they can do to support.
Dylan Mulvaney 21:10
What is Rotary?
James Mulvaney, Jr 21:12
Rotary is a group that started back in the early 1900s in Chicago. Mine is in downtown San Diego.
Dylan Mulvaney 21:19
It’s getting rich.
James Mulvaney, Jr 21:20
No, it’s not. It’s giving back to the community.
Dylan Mulvaney 21:23
Okay.
James Mulvaney, Jr 21:23
Good work and helping others that aren’t as blessed as we are. And you do breakfasts every Wednesday. We I just had the chief of police, who’s my good friend in San Diego, Scott wall, speak to us this week, and I got to introduce him. So I introduced him. I started off by saying, Hi, I’m Jim. I’m a Gemini. Got a little laugh, but more so I said, this is Scott, our my probation officer, and I got a good laugh too.
Dylan Mulvaney 21:49
Was he actually?
James Mulvaney, Jr 21:49
No east of Chief of Police.
Dylan Mulvaney 21:49
Well, let’s get let’s go back to because here’s the real deal. You used to be a bad boy. Oh, I my 20s.
James Mulvaney, Jr 21:56
Oh, bad, bad boy.
Dylan Mulvaney 22:00
Is that still in you? Or, like.
James Mulvaney, Jr 22:02
Definitely, I’m, you know, I’m blessed now that I’m clean and sober. You didn’t go to college, but. Greatest woman in my my life, there you.
Dylan Mulvaney 22:11
But so you were, I feel like, at the time where you, you didn’t go to college, but you still killed it in the game.
James Mulvaney, Jr 22:17
Done real well in the business world and insurance, but.
Dylan Mulvaney 22:20
Kind of the last of the era for like.
James Mulvaney, Jr 22:22
You know, most people have to go business, at least a lot of interviews. And I never had to do an interview and.
Dylan Mulvaney 22:30
Got that personality babes.
James Mulvaney, Jr 22:31
Work for them. And, yeah, no, I’ve always been a hard worker, just like you are. But more importantly, I’ve done, you know, I feel as though I’ve done things properly. I always think about my client. Instead of thinking about what’s best for me, I think about what’s best for you. And that still scares me a lot. It’s one of those worries in my life that some hater is going to do something that I’m going to have to do something about. And so that scares me.
Dylan Mulvaney 23:02
Well, we’ve made it this far. You also used to be kind of a ladies man back in the day. And, yeah, I’m trying to make this a good podcast so.
James Mulvaney, Jr 23:12
Sex sales, baby.
Dylan Mulvaney 23:14
Sexes, baby, do you have it like, it’s sort of interesting. Now I’m dating straight men. Like, what did you, what were your qualities of a woman that you really enjoyed back in the day?
James Mulvaney, Jr 23:26
Wow, it’s tough, because when I was drinking and drug and I didn’t give a shit, I just wanted to get in their pants. And I think you know with you, I one of the things I learned later on was I, I would walk up to a pretty woman, and I’d hand him a business card, and I’d say, Would you like to have lunch with me sometime? I’d love the opportunity to meet you. And, you know, in in out of the five business cards, I’d get one or two, you know, calling me back.
Dylan Mulvaney 23:56
Well, lunch is a nice touch, because it doesn’t seem assuming, you know, it’s like, oh, this, this man just wants to go out at a reasonable hour of daytime. I see right through.
James Mulvaney, Jr 24:06
And then when they now, but now I’m like, I’ve told you, I’m in love, and I’m very blessed. I’m done and but I in the past, it’s been, you know, I was, it was a yeah, that I just was not the good person that I am today, because I learned that.
Dylan Mulvaney 24:26
You’re still friends with a lot of your exes, which isn’t whole.
James Mulvaney, Jr 24:29
Your mother’s one of my favorite people, and my first wife, Tracy’s.
Dylan Mulvaney 24:34
What’s the secret to that?
James Mulvaney, Jr 24:38
Just being kind and thoughtful and understanding, listening. And as you know, I used to always just want to hear myself talk, and now I’m getting better with the.
Dylan Mulvaney 24:50
Now you can, you can listen after this episode, and there you are. Oh, boy how about like? Oh, as far as like qualities, like say that I’m. Trying to, you know, I’m seeing a guy, and he’s kind of like, maybe, like you were back in the day, kind of a player. Um, what’s some things that a woman can do to really, like, grab your attention?
James Mulvaney, Jr 25:13
I think it’s probably personality, um, it’s, uh, you know, not being a doormat, not being somebody that they can.
Dylan Mulvaney 25:26
Have you ever heard gay son or thought daughter?
James Mulvaney, Jr 25:28
No.
Dylan Mulvaney 25:29
Okay, so dad, gay son or thought daughter is now sort of the question on everyone’s lips here in the industry, because when you get a red carpet, this is actually a really good question for tonight. Would you rather have a gay son? Or do you know what a thought daughter is?
James Mulvaney, Jr 25:43
No.
Dylan Mulvaney 25:44
What does thought mean? It’s um Megan. Can you Google the definition of thought? So, dad,, gay son or thought daughter, gay son. You know what that is? Thought daughter is a daughter who likes to be promiscuous and get around town.
James Mulvaney, Jr 26:00
We had rather the gay son.
Dylan Mulvaney 26:02
Wow, and now you’ve had both, so that’s pretty fucking cool. I will say you’re welcome and you only have one kid.
James Mulvaney, Jr 26:09
Yeah, no, and I’ve got. And you kind of got the greatest boy, and now the greatest girl.
Dylan Mulvaney 26:14
That’s pretty crazy too. You can say, Okay, let’s go. Let’s go back to the gay.
James Mulvaney, Jr 26:19
Oh, I got a question for you. Am I gonna have to pay for the wedding if it ever comes up?
Dylan Mulvaney 26:23
You do, I’m nervous about that because my taste has gone up. Oh, well, let’s talk about when you created a monster. Because we were in San Francisco on a trip and we were going shopping the mall. This is when I was just wearing like, hand me downs gap, like you could throw me an Old Navy or Costco. I didn’t give a shit. What happened though, I was probably about eight or nine, and we’re walking by Abercrombie kids in the mall up in San Francisco, and I and you’re like, I was like, Oh, I heard about this through my friends. And you’re like, let’s go in. We look, and there was, like, a sweatshirt that was like $120 and I go, oh my God, we can’t get this. It’s too much. And you said, You know what, let’s get it. Dil, you can do it. And in that moment, a fucking fashion demon was born, because I then became addicted to Abercrombie, and then it just kept spiraling. But I do think we had so much fun when I was young, kind of like blueberry, Burberry. Oh, honey. The amount that like my I’ll never forget my dad, like, garb got me couldn’t believe that he spent 500 on a scarf. This was like, maybe two years ago. And he’s like, I got her the damn blueberry scarf. I’m like, what the fuck is blueberry, and he’s like, brewberry.
James Mulvaney, Jr 27:42
And I’m like, yeah, whatever it was.
Dylan Mulvaney 27:45
You’re the new like face. I can’t book a campaign with them, and they instantly make you the face of blueberry.
James Mulvaney, Jr 28:45
I hope so. That’s so good.
Dylan Mulvaney 30:21
Growing up like you, obviously, I feel like had a very specific like, when you were told you were having a son, which you didn’t. Did you know you wanted kids?
James Mulvaney, Jr 30:29
No, it was your mother surprised me on my 40th birthday scene, she was pregnant. And I’m like, You gotta be kidding. So greatest day of my life was the day you were born, though, but I, yes, I, I went and cleaned the baseball fields thinking that you were going to be a baseball star.
Dylan Mulvaney 30:47
How did that go?
James Mulvaney, Jr 30:48
Well, for me, it was fine. I was, you know, doing something on a Saturday that with these men. And, it was good. But then.
Dylan Mulvaney 30:55
And then, but I didn’t.
James Mulvaney, Jr 30:56
No, you didn’t want to be a baseball player. You wanted to sing and dance on the coffee table, well, wherever you want. You know, you wore mommy’s the high heels around and played with dolls, and then you got the Easy Bake Oven. When you were a kid, I would take you to different functions, where we would try out for plays. And every time the director would come up to me and say that you were the best person, the best actor, the best kid.
Dylan Mulvaney 31:25
Honey, I wish they they’d start doing that today. Maybe I gotta start bringing you to the audition.
James Mulvaney, Jr 31:29
Oh no, come on. They’re gonna you’re doing whatever you want.
Dylan Mulvaney 31:33
But so you obviously thought that you know, life was going to be one way. What do you like? Do you have any advice for someone who is, you know, maybe struggling that, like, has what they thought their kid was going to be like, and then turns out some kind of other way. What would you say to them? Yeah.
James Mulvaney, Jr 31:51
What I do get a lot of that, especially in the one of the programs I’m in, and my advice is just love, respect, listen, things I do I try to do with you, and I know sometimes I don’t, and you accept me for some of the shortcomings that I have, but yeah, I just tell people, it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s love. You just have to deal with your some of your thoughts that are not the thoughts that you should have and be proud and yeah, and I’m you’ve never, I’ve there’s nobody prouder than your father is of you so and I always will be.
Dylan Mulvaney 32:36
Thank you. I think that you know, what you’ve done such a great job of is like, turn, you know, you’ve had opinions about certain things and been able to, you know, shift those based on how life, you know, goes. And I think we’ve always tried to hold a good respect for each other when we do differ on opinions.
James Mulvaney, Jr 32:57
I’m conservative and you’re liberal, but.
Dylan Mulvaney 32:59
Yeah, we’re working on that on you too.
James Mulvaney, Jr 33:01
I again, I’m more down the middle of the street. Now I know what the what the right wants to do, and.
Dylan Mulvaney 33:06
Well that, what was it like to see the people that you know your watch your you know your television programs, then talk about your kid? What was that like?
James Mulvaney, Jr 33:15
Oh, Fox and yeah, it was brutal. And I wanted to call those guys up and tell them that they don’t know my daughter. And, you know, get off of it, because you’re you’re barking up the wrong tree, and, well.
Dylan Mulvaney 33:28
I think it’s really sad, like when you know, like, What? What? That made me realize too, because I kind of was watching almost through your eyes, was how clearly people can paint someone almost to be like a character on a like, when I watched myself during that time when, you know, was being attacked by people that you may be used to respect, um, it felt like they were talking about like a character, like, because it didn’t sound like me.
James Mulvaney, Jr 33:54
No, then it wasn’t you, and they just didn’t know you and, and I think that’s so true about all of the, you know, the CNNs and the the foxes, I just can’t watch any of it anymore. I That’s why I’m going to Bora, Bora for the month of October. So how do I don’t have to listen to, oh, I do and so do you.
Dylan Mulvaney 34:15
I do love me some more. I’ll take Mora Borah.
James Mulvaney, Jr 34:19
They have the ray rays there that.
Dylan Mulvaney 34:21
Oh, there’s a large trans community. It’s beautiful. It’s kind of iconic. It is I got there. It was like, nothing. I was like, wow, they’ve really got, they’ve got something figured out over here, way ahead of us. And the dance I would take the dance class.
James Mulvaney, Jr 34:33
It was classic. I’ve got the video of you dancing with those, with all of them, and they just loved you.
Dylan Mulvaney 34:40
Having a gay son, what, like, what was that like me growing up? Was I, I was a pretty good kid, and then I got kind of, like, angsty over the years, right?
James Mulvaney, Jr 34:49
Yeah, I don’t. I remember you and Lily going at it up there in the room, and maybe you had a bunch of other people up there.
Dylan Mulvaney 34:54
But can you like, not going at, going at, it sounds very presumptive.
James Mulvaney, Jr 34:58
Oh, no. Okay, you were, it was. Like the two of you were fighting, and you would be my best friend, like to wrestle, okay? And it was like, cats and dogs and people would be there. Most of the time, a girl with me would be going, what’s going on up there? And I’m like, you know […]
Dylan Mulvaney 35:12
Can I, we have some confessions here. I turned your house into a fucking brothel. I mean, sometimes, you know, if you’re out of town, you went out of town a lot.
James Mulvaney, Jr 35:23
A bit, yes.
Dylan Mulvaney 35:24
Do you remember the time? Do you remember when you’re you for my birthday? Present for my 18th birthday was you let me have the house for the night, and then you left, but then you came back too early in the morning because the party was still kind of gone and you couldn’t get into your bedroom, and my friend was sleeping with a guy in your bed. I see this carpet is very warranted tonight. You deserve the world, sir, yeah, and it was just, it was fun, though, because I feel like, in a way, I think because I wasn’t super conf like, I kind of moved through the world as I wanted to. I didn’t feel like, ever like, I wanted to lash out at you in like, really negative ways, because I was being like, it was almost good to have that kind of environment where I, you know, could be who I wanted to be most of the time.
James Mulvaney, Jr 36:24
And I was who I wanted to be. And that’s where we had a good time. I love, I love traveling with you, too. So that’s, that’s fine.
Dylan Mulvaney 36:32
It was, and you got me to scuba diving.
James Mulvaney, Jr 36:34
Oh, gosh […]
Dylan Mulvaney 36:37
What’s the next on the bucket list for a place? This is also, you’re kind of a man of habit. Are you like to, you know, you like, one or two things, just went to Scotland. Oh, honey, you went to Scotland. That was great. But usually you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t have gone if I hadn’t been there doing but I’ll do anything with where would you like to go if somebody was just like, where will be?
James Mulvaney, Jr 36:57
Greece would be probably a good one. Greece, the Mediterranean, we did that when you were 14 or 13. I took Dylan to the Rolling Stones concert in Rome, and we sat in the second row, and we got to have dinner where Charlie Watts, what the drummer, walked past me, and you didn’t have a clue who any of these guys still don’t you do like the stones, though? Yeah, sure, but they’re the greatest rock and roll band in the world and but just things that we were able to do out there, yeah, I’ll get it out there. We’ve seen him a whole bunch, but just just playing, you know, being with you different than Bora Bora is a fun one, but I do understand what you’re saying that I don’t travel to different places enough.
Dylan Mulvaney 37:44
Nobody, I think a creature of habit is not necessarily a bad thing, and if it helps keep you sober, and you’ve got your, you know, you get in your rhythms. What your what your walk us through your day. What is it? It starts early.
James Mulvaney, Jr 37:57
Oh, 4:30 I get to the gym at five every day. Damn man. You know, then I hit a meeting at seven for program I’m in. And then I go to a 10 o’clock business lunch, or a bit usually an appointment. And I’ve got a 12 o’clock lunch at some place most of the time, Mr. A’s in San Diego, a nice spot. And then I try to be home by two or so.
Dylan Mulvaney 38:21
You love the beach.
James Mulvaney, Jr 38:22
Do love the beach during the summer? I’m always down at a place called horseshoe or 22nd street in front of Trevor’s house.
Dylan Mulvaney 38:30
Now everybody knows where.
James Mulvaney, Jr 38:31
Jimmy mommy hangs out. It’s okay. I don’t care. Let them come at me if they want to, and if anybody does come at me, that’s where it’s diverting them from my home to yours? Yeah, well, that’s all right, but I’ll know. What I’m going to tell them, basically is, if they want to know what Dylan Mulvaney thinks and wants and acts and I’ll say, talk to Dylan. Oh, you know, I can’t talk to them. I know you will, I know.
Dylan Mulvaney 38:57
And what has been your favorite year of your life so far?
James Mulvaney, Jr 39:00
Wow, that’s a crazy, crazy question. I think this year because, you know, I’m healthy, I’m happy, I’m married to the most beautiful woman in the world, that’s keeping me in a much better place than I used to be. I’m getting to be more thoughtful and more understanding. I’m getting more patience because of you and your help you’ve given me all over these years of slowing down because I’m ADHD. I’m dyslexic. I got a lot of guys today. I just was looking at a green light down there on a meter, and Jen’s like, You got to be kidding me, that’s as red as blood. And I’m like, oh, it looks green to me.
Dylan Mulvaney 39:43
I’m color blind too. Oh yeah, wow, I got a lot of things from you, damn.
James Mulvaney, Jr 39:49
Yeah, you got your mommy too. She’s a crazy one.
Dylan Mulvaney 39:52
But, yeah, two Geminis, double Gemini parents. That’s wild. I can see a Gemini. I forgot that, but you and then used to. Party with fun people back in the day, oh, party. You know what story I love?
James Mulvaney, Jr 40:03
Tom Cruise?
Dylan Mulvaney 40:04
No.
James Mulvaney, Jr 40:05
Stevie the Fleetwood Mac. You know that one, the one at Fleet where I ran into Nick Fleetwood at the at Costco?
Dylan Mulvaney 40:15
No.
James Mulvaney, Jr 40:17
Oh. Stevie Nicks was puffing a joint. We were going down the freeway, and Stevie Nicks is in a limo, and she pulls she rolls down.
Dylan Mulvaney 40:26
You’re smoking a doobie in a on in like a convertible.
James Mulvaney, Jr 40:28
It’s an old beat up VW, right on iFive, and.
Dylan Mulvaney 40:32
You were headed to.
James Mulvaney, Jr 40:34
This Fleetwood Mac concert. But I had no idea who they were, and they said, pull over. So we pulled over this parking lot. We puff this joint with these two pretty women. And then then they I said, we’re going to the Fleetwood Mac concert. And they said, oh, so we just follow us. So we follow them down. We go into the backstage. They let us in because the girls in the limo said, Let them in. And then we go in, and we’re standing there, and all of a sudden, Stevie Nicks and Steph McBee walk up on the stage and start singing, you know […]
Dylan Mulvaney 41:09
You you got the Fleetwood Mac stone before the show?
James Mulvaney, Jr 41:12
Oh, yeah, got, got the girl stone. Yeah. Got a lot of great stories like that. But that’s just because, you know, hanging any others that you love. Well, the Tom Cruise story was good. I met Tom at the at George’s when he was doing a restaurant bar in La Jolla, when he was doing the, oh, the first Top Gun, yeah. And I said, walked over. I said, Tom, I loved you in risky business when you slid across the floor. And he said, yeah, that was fun. And I was there with my harem and a bunch of peeps, and he says to me, what are you doing tonight? And I said, I’m gonna go to Diego’s down PB. And he goes, hey, do you mind if I hang out with you?
Dylan Mulvaney 41:52
So like, do you mind?
James Mulvaney, Jr 41:54
Yeah, exactly.
Dylan Mulvaney 41:56
Like, not at all.
James Mulvaney, Jr 41:58
But he was fun, and he just was a nice man, and he had to go back to his hotel probably around 11, and I was probably out till six in the morning. So, you know, yeah, I do remember the day that I came. You were leaving for work, and I was walking in, and we kind of high fived all the way on the stairs. Didn’t might bother me. You did have an idea for transparent? Transparent, yes, what is that? Well, it would be a situation where people could, I would interview like you’re doing to me right now. You would, who would you interview parents that have trans children? If that’s not the most beautiful thing you’ve heard today, well, I just think it would be great, because that way they, they can all we can talk about, you know, what we deal with and how things are, you know, going and.
Dylan Mulvaney 42:43
Okay, well, let’s practice. What would you what would you ask me right now, just as an interviewer, what would you ask me?
James Mulvaney, Jr 42:48
I would say, what’s the toughest part of having a trans daughter?
Dylan Mulvaney 42:54
Well, having a trans daughter for me, that was good dad. Okay, we’ve got a show. Scoot over. Dylan, we got Jim coming in.
James Mulvaney, Jr 43:03
No, James Francis, I’m gonna leave it up to you, because I’m just happy being your your mom.
Dylan Mulvaney 43:08
But and as far as like, did you kind of like you saw that I was a very feminine kid? Yeah. And so was it like a super surprise to you when I came out?
James Mulvaney, Jr 43:20
No, not at all. I tell people I pretty much knew you were gay at five or six, and then you saying to your mother, and I, you know, mom, dad, I and I think you said it to her, and she mentioned it to me that I think God made a mistake and put a girl in a boy’s body. And, you know, that was you just have to embrace it. You have to understand, you know, there’s these things called chromosomes. And, you know, these assholes in the world don’t quite understand that. And, and like you said to me, dill the other day, a while back, is dad. What I’m doing right now is just like the gays 20 years ago, 30 years ago, and then 2030, years, it’s going to be just the same.
Dylan Mulvaney 44:05
Hopefully we don’t get our rights taken away.
James Mulvaney, Jr 44:08
They won’t be taken away. I’ll kill somebody before that so.
Dylan Mulvaney 44:11
You ever watched the handmaid tale? What did you watch the show The Handmaid’s Tale?
James Mulvaney, Jr 44:15
No.
Dylan Mulvaney 44:15
Oh, that’s a good one.
James Mulvaney, Jr 44:16
I don’t want […] Yeah, I do watch a lot at Netflix, Netflix and they had the second, the second season of Sylvester Stallone’s Tulsa King came, came on last night. Yeah, you don’t.
Dylan Mulvaney 44:31
No, that one, we have different tastes. But it was, I, I will say that after, during COVID, I moved back to your house for, I mean, I was there for a year.
James Mulvaney, Jr 44:41
And the best year ever.
Dylan Mulvaney 44:44
Oh, that’s.
James Mulvaney, Jr 44:45
Another way I’ve taught you a lot of these, little these, you know, this love you.
Dylan Mulvaney 44:51
No.
James Mulvaney, Jr 44:52
Yeah, fuck yes.
Dylan Mulvaney 44:55
Straight white man trying to claim a trans woman’s tagline.
James Mulvaney, Jr 44:59
Lets me all. Way ask anybody. Oh, and then recently, I’ve been asking you, where are you at on the.
Dylan Mulvaney 45:06
Happy scale? Oh, fuck, I go to now I go, but you know who I go up to, like Academy Awards winners, and I go, where you at on the happy scale?
James Mulvaney, Jr 45:15
That’s good stuff.
Dylan Mulvaney 45:16
A lot of unhappy people.
James Mulvaney, Jr 45:17
Oh, isn’t that suck? You know, I’m usually at eight. And now lately, you’ve been a nine little jealous.
Dylan Mulvaney 45:23
Well, I’m getting up there, baby, and back to COVID times with generals, which, well, Jen was, thank God, because and then, but we moved back to this house. There was a total top floor of this home. That was the entire thing. Was just one room, like a bowling alley. It was a bowling alley, and that was my bedroom because it didn’t have a bathroom in it. And so I go three times a night. So yeah, you tell them, and um, but I had to. I had your old California king bed or something. It looked like a pillow in this, like blank room. And I would sit up there, and I would just eat popsicles all day long and watch like Twilight and Gilmore Girls, and I’d come down for dinner, and I would, I would sleep till like two, and then I’d walk down.
James Mulvaney, Jr 46:08
Before it’s dark. He’d have every picnic basket that’s in Yellowstone Park, that’s Yogi Bear. Okay, go ahead.
Dylan Mulvaney 46:15
Where did we get you? Where did we get yo two o’clock.
James Mulvaney, Jr 46:17
That would you like it at two.
Dylan Mulvaney 46:19
And there’s the connection. But that was such a funny time, because I never thought I was gonna ever live with you again like that. And but we watched, we re watched Game of Thrones.
James Mulvaney, Jr 46:31
That was my first. That was yours. And every night we didn’t want to go, should we watch another 130 and I got to get it before let’s watch another one.
Dylan Mulvaney 46:40
Oh my god. And we love Mrs. Maisel. Rachel’s a friend of mine, and we just, oh, we that was a good that was a connecting time. We get so excited about takeout, and I would go on long runs that never happens anymore. Oh, you did a walk where you walked out of the storages they take, like, 14 miles or something.
James Mulvaney, Jr 46:58
Thought you were gonna die.
Dylan Mulvaney 46:59
I had nothing to live for, but I started transition. That’s what you didn’t really know, was that upstairs, what was happening was a trans woman was cooking, you know, the hair was growing the you know, I started estrogen shortly after, and it was just.
James Mulvaney, Jr 47:19
You also got your insurance license during that time.
Dylan Mulvaney 47:22
And that’s and now we’re back on the insurance pod, Mulvaney and Mulvaney was once Mulvaney and son.
James Mulvaney, Jr 47:29
Who’s going to do the dot into the I’s and cross the T’s, neither of us.
Dylan Mulvaney 47:36
But yeah, I got because, isn’t it? If you ever pass away, then I start my permission to work as fuck. That’s so America. That is so like.
James Mulvaney, Jr 47:46
Well, now Jen’s gonna do the same.
Dylan Mulvaney 47:48
Okay, so now we’re me and Jen are splitting. It is what everybody in the pod knows, me and Jen are split in the will. Oh shit, that’s good. How about do you?
James Mulvaney, Jr 48:00
When are you gonna buy me the house in Del Mar?
Dylan Mulvaney 48:02
When am I gonna buy the house in Del Mar? Yes, right. What about as far as like, we’ve always talked about, like, if one of us is on life support ever, we’re gonna pull the cords.
James Mulvaney, Jr 48:13
Done, we talked talk about that all the time. But what we’re gonna do is give each other, like, 100 a lot of drugs, yes.
Dylan Mulvaney 48:21
What kind do you want? Xanax? Who work? Maybe.
James Mulvaney, Jr 48:24
I’d like oxy. Oh, at the end, that’s a little more.
Dylan Mulvaney 48:28
Hopefully we never have to do that for each other. But I don’t think I talk. Why am I talking about this on every podcast? I want to be buried in a tree, really? Where do you want your ashes?
James Mulvaney, Jr 48:36
Uh, Bora Bora. Okay, horseshoe, maybe a little Del Mar, um, what other spots.
Dylan Mulvaney 48:46
Are you scared of death?
James Mulvaney, Jr 48:47
No, it’s something that.
Dylan Mulvaney 48:50
Maybe that’s the Mola, anything.
James Mulvaney, Jr 48:51
Wwe never none of us are going to get out of here alive, that’s for sure.
Dylan Mulvaney 48:55
But we had a good time while we were here.
James Mulvaney, Jr 48:58
We’ve showed him how to do it.
Dylan Mulvaney 50:18
If you were to give anyone like a young person, a piece of advice, what would you tell them that?
James Mulvaney, Jr 50:24
Like, slow down, you crazy, don’t worry, be happy.
Dylan Mulvaney 50:31
That’s a song by Hootie the Blowfish.
James Mulvaney, Jr 50:33
I’m gonna get ready to do it, but I won’t just the things that took me a long time that I’m finally getting there now at the, you know, later in life. And where am I? I guess I’m on the seventh floor, 10th floor, 10th floor building. I, you know, I don’t.
Dylan Mulvaney 50:49
Of what?
James Mulvaney, Jr 50:50
As far as life’s concerned, […] you’re still way down on the bottom.
Dylan Mulvaney 50:55
Really? Yeah, I feel like I’ve lived a lot of life, man.
James Mulvaney, Jr 50:58
Yeah, well.
Dylan Mulvaney 51:01
I’m happy though you do things and now, and I’ve exposed you to the musicals, Broadway musicals. What’s your favorite?
James Mulvaney, Jr 51:09
You know, that’s great one. I think it’s, it’s got to be up there with the wicked. Yep, that’s one of your faves. I can tell you a story about that, but we don’t have the time.
Dylan Mulvaney 51:19
I remember my first trip to New York with you. We traded. We’d get we’d go to a Yankee game during the day.
James Mulvaney, Jr 51:25
Three Yankee Padre games.
Dylan Mulvaney 51:27
And then we’d go to a Broadway show at night. We would Q Avenue Q.
James Mulvaney, Jr 51:33
The ladies think I was the worst dad in the world.
Dylan Mulvaney 51:35
And then you also, I tried it. You were gonna take me to menopause, the musical. And my mom, she got so pissed, she was like [..]
James Mulvaney, Jr 51:46
You can’t take him to that. You can’t take her to that one, damn it.
Dylan Mulvaney 51:49
And honestly, I think that would have been kind of educational for us both.
James Mulvaney, Jr 51:52
But definitely for me, but you were much more mature than I was. You know, I was the old guy and you were the young kid, and the ladies would be looking at me like Damn Yankees, I think we saw at the Old Globe.
Dylan Mulvaney 52:04
Oh, no, the wait was there. There was a naked one, that’s not Damn Yankees. That’s um, take take me out with a play. What they Yeah, they got naked in the back, yeah. And, you know what I probably knew going in, and I just sat there with a devilish grin, like, you have no fucking idea what you took me to.
James Mulvaney, Jr 52:20
Oh, I was, you know, I didn’t care. I thought it was great. It was an education for me. And that’s what’s really been great about our lives together, is you have helped educate me, to help me to be the man I am today, which is a much better man than was 2628 years ago, before you showed up on this earth. And thank you. Oh, it’s a fact. I just, you know, I’m I wouldn’t be with this beautiful woman any you know, I wouldn’t have what I have.
Dylan Mulvaney 52:49
I now, we’ve done a lot of over sharing. Today. We have a segment called overshare, don’t care on The Dylan Hour, and we’re gonna do a lightning round of questions for you. Are you ready?
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:00
I’m ready.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:01
Okay, two minutes on the clock. Dream golf Foursome.
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:05
Jack Nicholson, Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:13
Great favorite part of sobriety.
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:16
Oh, the fact I wake up every morning without a hangover and I’m not shaking like I used to.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:21
Favorite part about being a dad.
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:24
Watching you grow and turning into the woman you’ve turned into.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:28
Least favorite part about being a dad.
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:31
Keep putting out those $1,000 a month, the 2000 a month that I needed to back when you were at in your college days.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:41
Best advice you’ve ever gotten.
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:44
Stop drinking and drugging. You’re killing yourself.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:48
Beach or mountains, huh? Beach or mountain?
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:51
Beach.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:52
What would you exclaim if you stubbed your toe.
James Mulvaney, Jr 53:55
Fuck.
Dylan Mulvaney 53:58
Early riser or night owl.
James Mulvaney, Jr 54:00
Early I used to be in the night owl and I’d be watching the sun come up, but no, I’m an early riser.
Dylan Mulvaney 54:05
Go to dance move.
James Mulvaney, Jr 54:09
Yeah, the roof is the roof. Raise the roof.
Dylan Mulvaney 54:14
Do you have a pet peeve.
James Mulvaney, Jr 54:17
Assholes in this world that don’t understand.
Dylan Mulvaney 54:19
Drivers, thank you, and we’ll, no, that’s the last question. And we think we should get into it, honey.
James Mulvaney, Jr 54:27
I can’t drive. I drive great, but I just drive like my father so mad, dear, I do I get and I, I’m getting better.
Dylan Mulvaney 54:36
Throw it on your turn into pedal.
James Mulvaney, Jr 54:37
Oh, yeah, no, just, you know, just one thing after another, but it’s just like my pop. Did you know my mother would have fits driving with Jim? Jim, don’t get so close to that car. But you know, I’m just that’s part of us. I’m not gonna say that I haven’t been in an accident, because they really haven’t.
Dylan Mulvaney 54:56
You accept my transness. I accept your driving.
James Mulvaney, Jr 54:58
Okay.
Dylan Mulvaney 54:58
Wow, how about, I mean, you love skiing. Do you remember snow? Skiing got hurt a few times with you up there?
James Mulvaney, Jr 55:04
Oh, man, that was terrible. One of the one that we late in the day, I took her down a.
Dylan Mulvaney 55:12
Black Diamond, black maybe.
James Mulvaney, Jr 55:15
This way is quicker, back to the.
Dylan Mulvaney 55:16
I’m sure it was, yes, it was straight up, and it was a 90 degree.
James Mulvaney, Jr 55:20
You know, we’re going down the Bob sled, and then, then, when she hit her head on a getting off of a tram, we didn’t wear back then, pussies only wore helmets. Now, they all wear helmets, but I haven’t been in.
Dylan Mulvaney 55:33
I was wearing a helmet that day. Were you? Yeah, oh, thank God. And smacked it good, because you and uncle were pushing off, and sent me back into the lift. And so by the time I jumped off, it threw me into the building.
James Mulvaney, Jr 55:50
That was a toughie, and that was on the cornice of mammoths.
Dylan Mulvaney 55:53
I will say tobogganing down a mountain is a good time.
James Mulvaney, Jr 55:56
Yeah, I bet it was. No, I think skiing is great. It’s just when you get older, I just don’t like the cold anymore. I don’t like the cold fingers, the cold toes.
Dylan Mulvaney 56:06
We got to get a Jacuzzi, I always say that’s when you made is when you have a Jacuzzi?
James Mulvaney, Jr 56:10
Oh, we need that house. We have one out at in the it’s a communal one. Yeah, that’s kind of yucky, but, yeah, it’s a.
Dylan Mulvaney 56:17
You does the pool still look like used to?
James Mulvaney, Jr 56:19
Oh, it’s nicer.
Dylan Mulvaney 56:20
Were you stoned when you throw me up in the time that sounds to go. We used to go.
James Mulvaney, Jr 56:26
Wake and bake Jimmy.
Dylan Mulvaney 56:28
Jimmy, we go to the pool, and he tossed me up in the air, and we do flips for all the people watching at the community pool, and then we’d go to the mall and go watch kids movies.
James Mulvaney, Jr 56:37
Yeah. Oh, that’s a bummer about not having a kid around anymore, because I have to rent a kid to go see you know, I love the minions and, you know.
Dylan Mulvaney 56:48
He just wants to be able to go to the movie, kids movie and the movie theater without being judged. The old guy doing in here. You’re like, yeah, no, that’s your reading level.
James Mulvaney, Jr 56:57
It’s pretty much, yeah, yeah. I didn’t who we do.
Dylan Mulvaney 57:01
We loved it.
James Mulvaney, Jr 57:01
I think third grade was the three worst years of my life.
Dylan Mulvaney 57:06
That’s good.
James Mulvaney, Jr 57:07
Thank you.
Dylan Mulvaney 57:08
That’s great.
James Mulvaney, Jr 57:09
Yeah, my dad would say I’d come home with the three F’s and a D, and I’d say, Dad, maybe, maybe I tried a little too hard in that one subject.
Dylan Mulvaney 57:18
Well, now we’ve got a last call confessional, a caller from the Dylan hour, one of our followers is going to say a little message to us, and we’ll respond.
James Mulvaney, Jr 57:29
Cool,do we know?
Dylan Mulvaney 57:31
Not yet, well, we don’t know any strangers do.
James Mulvaney, Jr 57:35
Too many.
Caller 57:43
This is my concession the other day I was in the West Village. I was eating dinner, and you were sitting at the bar next to me with your friend, and I was too afraid to say hi, because I didn’t want to bother you at dinner. But I have to say it was the most exciting moment of my life. I don’t even know the name of the name of the restaurant. With the Italian place. You were with your friend. We got the same pasta. He looks very beautiful. You had a black sparkly dress on. I was very excited. Was sitting right next to you with my friend at the bar. Most exciting moment of my whole life. And I wish I would have said hi, but you looked wonderful.
Dylan Mulvaney 58:19
Thank you, friend, did you hear that?
James Mulvaney, Jr 58:22
Yeah. What kind of pasta?
Dylan Mulvaney 58:24
Oh, kacho Pepe. I remember it now. It was st Ambrosius and in the West Village in New York. And I did. I remember seeing some eyes across the bar that maybe wanted to say hello, but you being the network King that you are, what would be your advice for someone to like to be able to feel like they can say hello to people.
James Mulvaney, Jr 58:46
Walk right up and say, I love you, Dylan, you just have to remember that everybody’s just a person. We all put on our clothes the same way we all, you know, but that is so nice. That’s so sweet of what you just said. Because I run into that all the time, where, when I’m out with dill, and where somebody will be like, Oh my god, we’re in Bora, Bora and and across the pool, this young girl about 14, comes over and goes, Mom, mom, it’s still in Dylan Mulvaney. And I’m like, Yeah, about.
Dylan Mulvaney 59:22
Dad, well, this is your moment, honey. Get ready.
James Mulvaney, Jr 59:27
I want you just to have it. I don’t need it. I’ve had a my moment is been many times, but getting to watch you and the people you know that are so proud of you and what you’re doing for the trans community and helping, you know, the them realize that it’s okay to be somebody that’s, you know, because a lot of people want to just shut their doors and hide and and not you. You’re you’re out there and in don’t ever change, because, you know, if you do, you won’t be the Dylan Mulvaney. That the world wants and needs and, yeah, just keep doing what.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:00:05
You don’t change either. Not too much.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:00:08
I’m working on it.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:00:09
You’ve really, I’m telling you, I’ve watched you evolve so much over these last few years. And you’re you’re calmer, you’re kinder, you’re thoughtful, you shop at other places than Costco.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:00:21
I think I got these. But Jen gets me everything.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:00:24
Wild socks, honey.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:00:26
I love wild socks.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:00:26
Yeah, I know it. And now we’re gonna go hit the carpet, and we’re gonna hopefully have a great time tonight, I know you love LA, and you would love to just live here and sit in traffic as much as you can.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:00:39
Oh, God, I hate it, but yes.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:00:42
That is something the I feel like your condition in San Diego to like immediately hate LA, like you just everyone’s conditioned that way.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:00:49
And it’s because when I was a little kid, my mom and dad sent me up to Pasadena to stay with my aunt. And back when, in the 70s and in the 60s, there was so much smog, you couldn’t breathe, and your eyes would water, and you’d be like miserable. And I really, literally thought my parents were torturing me when they sent me to LA and you know that? Yeah, that pretty much started it and but the traffic is, it’s tough. And I’m sure there’s people that have helicopters or something that don’t worry about it, but.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:01:21
I’m not one of those.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:01:22
No, but you do take a lot of those, you know, Ubers and stuff. I do love an Uber. I do be loving an Uber. Yeah? Well, that’s the way to do it, especially if you’re ever drinking, and I know you don’t drink too much, but yeah, make sure you’ve anybody listening that there’s ever a drop of alcohol in them. Uber it, because it isn’t worth it any any other way, and I’ll pay the bill if I have to.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:01:45
Oh shit. So now we got them coming to your house for cookies. They’re sitting on the beach.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:01:49
I make a great chicken parmesan too, oh no.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:01:53
Would you ever do a vegan one for me? I don’t think you could.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:01:57
What would.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:01:58
Vegan tofu?
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:02
I would try it, but it would not think it’d be all that good.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:06
Oh, my God.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:07
Some time, I do a good spaghetti squash and stuff.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:10
Oh, you know, I don’t like vegetables. Was that? Oh, this is a good way to wrap up. Did I always fucking hate healthy food?
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:17
Yes, you did. You were terrible. I remember when you I remember when you ate your first salad, I was so proud.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:24
How old was I? Like, 11.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:25
No, we were in Rome or someplace.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:29
To go to this I had to go to Caesar, the place to eat a season.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:32
We got you to eat that salad. That was great. And then.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:35
Still, the only salad I’ve eaten.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:37
And then he’s like, shrimp, too.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:39
Shrimp now in lobster.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:40
Well, but the shrimp, the shrimp, they brought out heads, the head still on them, in the crow claws.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:46
Oh, guys.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:47
It was like, immediately, get it away from me. Get it away from me. And I’m like, couldn’t believe that
Dylan Mulvaney 1:02:53
That’s was you ordered shrimp and that’s how they came.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:02:56
We didn’t know they were gonna come that way. But, yeah, you have always eat. I just went to Scotland, Jen and I just went to Scotland to see Dylan in an incredible play called fag hag. And you were incredible. That’s going to Broadway, no doubt. And I we the one thing she asked us to bring her were Cheez Its and my cookies, but Cheez Its and I’m like, oh boy, and you brought them. Oh yeah, big family box I loved that was in my suitcase.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:03:27
Now I’ve got a few snacks over there that I have people bringing them, bringing me back, things Percy pigs.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:03:32
Yeah, I saw that.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:03:34
Ate a lot of dominoes while I was there, but I think you just took me to McDonald’s a lot when I was young. I remember that was kind of the trade off.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:03:41
I hated it, you know.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:03:42
I can, but you could stick me up in the you know, I’d run in. I could probably go out and get stoned, yeah, and then you like, McDonald’s.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:03:49
No, I actually stopped that when you were probably about four or so, so I had to grow up. And that’s what you’ve helped me with, is growing up and getting me more.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:03:59
But we’re still kind of.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:04:00
Oh, I’m still Peter Pan all of our lives, baby, you know, I’ll never grow I don’t want to go to school.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:04:11
And everyone watching The Dylan Hour. This has been, I was gonna say Jim Mulvaney, where can they find you? That is my favorite part of this episode, is the fact that you don’t want them to.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:04:26
No thank you, but I want to be your dad forever and ever. I just I’m so proud of you. It’s great.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:04:35
I love you. Okay, everyone. And oh, also, an amazing organization that we both love is called The Trevor Project, and they donate to crisis services for queer youth that don’t have accepting families like mine. So think about supporting them. We’ll try to put a link in one of these bios.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:04:57
But Dylan did the.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:04:59
Day three, 365.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:05:01
In New York City was one of the great days of my life. I got to walk up and wasn’t even rehearsed. I walked up on stage when she was giving a talk about the Trevor Project, and I just went up crying, and I told her how proud I was in
Dylan Mulvaney 1:05:15
That, and at first I go, What the fuck is he doing up here? There’s we’ve been rehearsing this for weeks, and we got a rogue dad, and then you hugged me, and I really needed a hug. And I don’t think you knew this, but that went really viral on Tiktok.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:05:29
Oh yeah, I’m sure it did, but it was mostly my back of my head. And people are saying, Why didn’t you turn around? And I kept just saying, because I was crying so bad I didn’t want everybody to see it, but I don’t mind crying.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:05:40
Well, the back of your head looked great, dad.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:05:42
I cried three.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:05:43
Still got a good head of hair.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:05:44
You got that?
Dylan Mulvaney 1:05:45
Now, that’s something in the Mulvaney family that’s really working. But I did. I got mine to, you know, mine started up here once upon a time, and it’s, we got it taken down here now.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:05:54
Yeah, well, so one of my best friends says we got Kennedy hair.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:06:01
Okay.
James Mulvaney, Jr 1:06:02
I love you.
Dylan Mulvaney 1:06:03
Love you.
CREDIT 1:06:07
Want even more of The Dylan Hour? Now is a great time to subscribe to Lemonada premium. You’ll get bonus content, outtakes and more from conversations with fabulous guests like Joe Locke and Dylan’s dad, Jim Mulvaney. Just hit the subscribe button on Apple podcasts, or for all other podcast apps, head to lemonadapremium.com to subscribe. That’s lemonadapremium.com. The Dylan Hour is a production of Lemonada Media. Our supervising producer is Jess […]. Producers are Carmen Laura, Kegan Zema and Aria Bracci. Audio and video production and engineering by Jordan Lynn, Ivan Kuraev and Brian Castillo. Our SVP of weekly programming is Steve Nelson. Our theme song was composed by Daniel Mertzloft and arranged by Aaron Kaufman. Special thanks to Megan Strickland. Executive producers, Stephanie Wittels Wachs, Jessica Cordova Kramer, Katherine Law and Dylan Mulvaney. You can find us online @lemonadamedia, and you can find Dylan on Tiktok and Instagram @DylanMulvaney. Follow The Dylan Hour wherever you get your podcasts, or listen ad free on Amazon music with your Prime membership.
