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The Aunties are reunited after a month apart! Su has returned from the homeland in goblin mode, and there’s more to unpack than the checked bags. She tells Ku about surviving the 14 hour flight with two kids, and whether all those travel accouterments (foot slings, butt pillows) got the job done. Though she bought less sunscreen than you’d think, the shopping in South Korea is still unmatched. Plus, why she’s come home changed on a molecular level. She poses an earthshaking question: are they perhaps NOT Aunties after all?

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• Su’s foot hammocks actually worked on the flight
• Ku is getting her eyes done…implantable contact lenses, that is
• New to the travel saga? Check out our episode with Dylan Thuras of Atlas Obscura 

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Transcript

SPEAKERS

Kulap Vilaysack, SuChin Pak

Kulap Vilaysack  00:10

Carters, welcome back, it’s your auntie, Kulap Vilaysack.

 

SuChin Pak  00:13

And I’m your other just over jet lag, auntie SuChin Pak. Wait a minute, wait a minute, before we get into it. This is the first time I’m seeing you.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  00:24

Yes.

 

SuChin Pak  00:25

With your gamine haircut. I saw the photo in the group chat, but this is the first time I have seen it just moving in its own energy and life, what?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  00:39

We got a French Bob.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  00:40

Thank you.

 

SuChin Pak  00:40

How gorgeous.

 

SuChin Pak  00:43

Fresh Bob.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  00:44

French Fresh Bob.

 

SuChin Pak  00:46

The French, Fresh Bob for the summer, maybe the best haircut you’ve had, although you’ve had a lot of good haircuts.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  00:52

Thank you, Su.

 

SuChin Pak  00:54

But this one required some precision.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  00:57

Oh yes, you know what I mean?

 

SuChin Pak  00:58

Getting a bob that length, you can’t just do it in the mirror with kitchens.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  01:05

Oh, yeah, and this, this is not my skill set, is cutting hair. That is not anything that you should allow me to do. That should? That should be illegal, and for me, it is and so got me a cut, and I’m feeling great.

 

SuChin Pak  01:22

I know.

 

SuChin Pak  01:23

And you’ll have days you’ll wake Uh oh, and it’s, it’s Mrs. Patterson, you know the kindergarten teachers? Yeah, they’re at in kindergarten. And there, then there’ll be days when your shoulders are shimmying and your ass is tight, you know, it just, that’s the thing about a haircut that length is it’s a roll of the dice, and you’re living on the edge, and I love the.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  01:23

You know you really have to walk the line of it being like, just straight up, Mom hair. You gotta walk it, it’s a tough like […]

 

Kulap Vilaysack  01:58

Razor’s edge, literally, yeah, literally, and my Susu, welcome back. There was a Su shaped hole in my heart down to the bird like feet. While you were away, I’m so excited to finally hear about your South Korea trip in full. We have had a few meetings. We’ve exchanged texts. I know you were gone for well gone, physically gone from America, but gone from your mind soul for some time after you returned. So you know, it’s time to get it, to get this behind the scenes of this epic vacation.

 

SuChin Pak  02:37

Well, well, let me just say that i i I go into, of course, any epic vacation with, like, inspiration boards, you know, of a bucket list, life, mommy for you, travels.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  02:53

You know, streams, aspirations.

 

SuChin Pak  02:56

Luxurytrips.com, and I think I’m gonna do it, you know, I’m gonna do it this time. And yet, when who knows, I go so dark. I go so dark. I don’t check one electronic device while I’m abroad. I I barely take photos. And so it was dark. I’ve been I’ve been missing for your life, really, for a month, like, I have not responded to texts, per se. It’s just been me grappling with my own decisions. And let me tell you, I’ve been back for a minute and been thinking about this record, and I’m like, I can’t go in there, like with my old crusty fucking self, I can’t go in there all Goblin, dark and full of venom I got. I gotta give some light to the people. It’s summertime, like I’m so sick of it. And then, and then another voice is like, but you’re a terrible liar.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  03:58

Okay, well, let me, let me. Let me start over and say, come as you are, be authentically you, and I’ll keep it light. And that is our podcast.

 

SuChin Pak  04:11

Great, great, great, great. So anywho did I have fun? Let’s, let me circle back to that, because I think I need to. I think the process is you work through the stages of grief before you come to what’s the last one?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  04:26

Acceptance?

 

SuChin Pak  04:27

Your own death. Well, it’s always alright for that. There’s acceptance.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  04:35

Yeah, surrender, I guess, Su. So we’re putting a pin in. Did she have any fun?

 

SuChin Pak  04:44

I could spend the this in my entire section of my cart just on the flight. I we have been leading up to this pretty much all year of my flight, you know, and we’ve had guests come on. So many guests. With their recommendations. And I it takes a community of well wishers and experts to get this soup off the ground right, and I appreciate that. So I went in with, I mean, four different kinds of neck pillows, two different kinds of eye no, sorry, three different kinds of eye pillows, foot slings, a donut pillow for my butt. I’m just trying to think of, you know, besides the blankets and my bean pillow, okay, I’m just say, all this new equipment and the reason why he brought blankets, of course, of course, had to bring blankets. I have no idea. I’m traveling with two kids. What if, in the middle of it, they’re like, I’m cold, you know? And then I have to figure something out. And thank God, thank God, I brought all of it. And thank God I brought blankets. I brought a giant cashmere shawl. I brought, I mean, I brought everything, because I just didn’t know.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  06:02

And you’re saying, you’re saying, thank God, because you did use every piece. Nothing was untouched.

 

SuChin Pak  06:07

I did. Yes, everything was used, and most of it was left behind in the seats. I gotta be honest with you, I may not be welcome on asiana.com maybe in my lifetime, or at least for a few years. They have to have there, it’s a Korean airline. They have to have a system for tracking me and just the amount of shit I left on the plane because I said, this didn’t work, and I’m not lugging it around. Donut pillow. Oh, worked fine for about an hour, and then I somehow popped a hole in it, and little tiny Styrofoam balls came flying out of that thing, like, imagine being on a 13 hour flight with tiny, minuscule Styrofoam balls that make up a pillow that burst it out so everyone’s covered in white styrofoam balls and.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  07:14

Let the bigger issue is, why do you have a jagged ass? What is happening down there that is tearing up?

 

SuChin Pak  07:22

We don’t have time. I try, but because, because that was sticking out, there was a tag sticking out. First of all, my ass is jagged. That is the most accurate description of my ass I have ever heard anyone. I said I have a flat ass. I have a zero ass. You know, I have a leg butt, which means that the leg goes straight into my backbone, jagged. It’s just bony and all right angles. How a butt develops that way, I cannot tell you, but I believe it is the source of a lot of my back problems, because it’s okay.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  08:00

We digress. We digress.

 

SuChin Pak  08:01

My jagged bones pop this fucking thing, and there’s Styrofoam balls flying everywhere. I mean, it’s everywhere. So besides that foot slings, those actually worked. Those I kept the neck pillow that attached to the back of this.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  08:19

Yeah, that one.

 

SuChin Pak  08:20

That then also had an eye pillow, a neck pillow and a strap to keep your head in place.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  08:26

It worked?

 

SuChin Pak  08:27

Bullshit. It bullshit worked. It was bullshit.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  08:31

All right, can we send this clip to Dylan theris, please? I think he’ll be very satisfied.

 

SuChin Pak  08:35

So hot, I was so hot in that thing, sweat, sweat pouring from my neck, my eyes, your eyes, can sweat different from other sweat, so much heat is generated from your head. Who knew that when you in, when you encapsulate it in polyurethane material and strap it to the back of a seat. Your skin doesn’t breathe, chuck it. I bought a I bought different kinds of neck pillows for my children and myself, the one I have, I travel with all the time, I kept my children can’t sleep with neck pillows. They can’t sleep sitting up. They’re still bendy enough where their preferred mode is some sort of like fetal position, yeah, you know, neck crank, like they couldn’t maneuver that out done.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  09:31

Left.

 

SuChin Pak  09:31

So let me just left behind. Left Behind.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  09:34

There was quite a bit of wreckage where your presence was.

 

SuChin Pak  09:38

No, I tried to leave it in a nice pile, and I was like, have at it. I hope someone.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  09:45

So you pretended like it was the curb?

 

SuChin Pak  09:48

I was just short of like a little note that said, free.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  09:55

Make sense.

 

SuChin Pak  09:56

By the way, the flight was landing in Korea. Bet you there’s, there’s some old Auntie ajimas out there stitched up a donut pillow. It’s fine, so that was the flight that was just even the stuff. I’m not going to tell it bore you with the details of of the horrendous flight, 14 hours with two children, just the amount of vomit, that my son produced.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  10:23

Is your brother with you?

 

SuChin Pak  10:25

My brother, my poor brother, my poor brother, who does not have children by choice. I wonder why, who I suckered when I tell you, I duped him into this trip, and I sold it so hard, he had no choice. That’s actually like the first thing when I landed and I was back in my bed, and I was like, whoa. I wonder how my brother is processing what just happened. If you don’t have kids, there’s there’s nothing, there’s no judgment, you just have no idea. And not only that, your kids and your family, how you run is so specific to your own family. So even if you did have kids, you wouldn’t understand why my children can’t, you know, sleep with the neck pillow or eat anything on the plane, you know, like, that’s not maybe your children. That’s just my children. So so many layers of confusion, of well, decisions being affirmed for my brother as well. So that’s that’s good to know that he made the does not want, he made the right choice for him. But, I mean, there were so many times because we each took a kid, we were in a tutu, and so we each took a kid, and we had it all planned out. It’s not that. And then, you know, Kai kept getting sick, and so then we’d have to switch. And I’m like, so sorry, nobody slept. So sorry. You know, Sue, you’re gonna have to switch with me, because as soon as I got Kai settled then, so we would be upset, because, of course, promises were made that on the flight there, Mom sat with Zoe. On the flight back, mom would sit with Kai, and she wasn’t gonna go. She didn’t give a fuck, no. So every time he got settled, then I’d have to go back because she’d be upset. So it was just like, just tapping on my brother’s shoulder and him being like, yeah, okay, let me get my stuff.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  12:16

Oh man.

 

SuChin Pak  12:16

Just switching back and forth.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  12:19

Oh man.

 

SuChin Pak  12:20

Because I couldn’t have my daughter lose it, but not on a 14 hour flight where my son is, like, so sick, I just, I couldn’t have her lose it. So, like, we both had to work to keep that volcano from erupting, because there was already, you could feel the tension one, yes, you could. So anyway, so that was the flight. And that was.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  12:42

That was, you know, a tiny little hop, skip, jump of 14 hours over the ocean.

 

SuChin Pak  12:49

And in summary, something I learned is never, ever take an overnight flight with children, now there are people that are like that, told me, which is why I picked the overnight flight. They’re gonna sleep through the flight. You’ll wake up and you’ll be in Korea. That was the fantasy I was holding on to. If that doesn’t happen, then you have 14 hours of dark. You know what I mean, where these kids are so wired, amped, unable to sleep, it’s so much slower in the dark with a quiet plane trying to get through that then it is sort of with an active plane. And there’s snacks, there’s beverages, you can get up easily. You know, you don’t have to be quiet. So anyway, so I learned that, and that’s that.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  13:45

Okay, what else have you learned?

 

SuChin Pak  13:48

Let’s go into some positive

 

Kulap Vilaysack  13:50

Oh, wow, okay.

 

SuChin Pak  13:53

Because I realized that my cart is heavy, and I just want to lighten the load. I’m going to do what I did with my airplane gear, and just chuck it, leave it for someone else to pick up. You know, I think as hyphenated Americans here, you know, homeland is a really loaded word, right? And it is a really interesting thing to go back to your country, where everyone looks like you and it feels like home, like literally, physically inside your mother’s kitchen all the time, and you’re both at home and a complete […]. And I thought it was going to be a sad experience, but it was kind of life altering in a really good way. I am, for many reasons, like a different person, like molecularly, every cell in my body is different, having gone on this trip.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  14:53

Speak more on that, like, what? Was there a return to self? Was there a?

 

SuChin Pak  14:59

It was a return to self. It was an acceptance of self like my brother and I are like, whoa. Everybody looks like us, like, there’s no, yeah, you just, you just, you just don’t realize how subconscious and unconscious in this country, being othered race is in every, every single instance, that when you’re out like you just don’t realize, like that, how much of that is always the background noise, until it turns off, and then you’re like, well, this is crazy, that nobody sees me as different, that I’m just another body in the way, you know, and you just, it’s fine. It’s so important to experience that. And this may also be like a generational thing, because for us, like being Asian American, being that, is such a like Stark thing, whereas with now, I feel like it’s a lot more fluid. There’s a lot more access. You see more pictures. You see more images. It’s not by any imagination, like perfect, but like, you know, you open Instagram and there’s people that you know, you can find people that look like you doing interesting things and connect in a way that you and I like, where did we go to get people, you know, like the esprit catalog, you know. So it’s just so like, having that experience, like almost being 50, and like, really, really having that for a long a chunk of time, it was a bit like somebody turned off the sound machine, and you’re like, oh, I can hear things a little clearer.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  16:40

So remind us, how old were you when you left Korea?

 

SuChin Pak  16:44

I was five.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  16:45

You were five, and when’s the last time you were back?

 

SuChin Pak  16:48

Well, this is really my first trip. I went back for work, but I’d never really, you know, and I never saw Korea. I was just working. I went back for like, maybe five days. Then that was also a long time ago. It’s probably like 25 years ago, 20 years ago before, you know how?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  17:09

I don’t know if I really realized this was, like, what this trip was. I kind of really just focused on, like, oh, wow she’s taking her kids, you know, like it was more that which it is. But I don’t think I fully understood that this was going to be such a return well.

 

SuChin Pak  17:28

And on top of that I connect, was connecting with family that I had never really met, and with family that, like, frankly, I didn’t even know existed, you know, not because of some deep, dark secret, or anything like that. It just, I don’t know, like, my parents were never the type to, like, keep in touch. You know, it was expensive. Then they never went back to Korea. They didn’t talk about it. It was just me, my mom, my dad and my brother trying to, you know, axe our way through, adolescence and adulthood. You know, in my mind growing up, it was always pictured to me that like, oh Korea, thank God we left to make a better life for you. Korea that you know, backward country, but here in America, you drink from the golden chalice, you know, and then to see that, like, no, they’re like, these really hip, fashionable, cool with interesting jobs. And, you know, like modern Korean relatives, like, I have no experience with that zero. That was also affirming in a way that I did not see coming, you know, because I was expecting to meet, like, versions of my mother. Interesting, there are, there aren’t versions of my mother in Korea. Let’s just say, let’s just say, part of the reason my brother was bamboozled into this trip with my two children was we were going to take our mother back. So it was going to be a whole, like, multi generational, I had this, like, YouTube fantasy, you know, like of us. And then my mother, two days before our flight, was like, yeah, I’m not going. And so, yeah, so that that was, that was it. But to be fair, and and now that I am out of it, thank God my mother didn’t come. I had no this is the first trip my my kids have taken off this continent, and it was the first time I’ve taken my kids anywhere that I haven’t already been and familiar with. It was just a group of mole rats sniffing our way to anything, you know, like and it’s Korea, for those listening who’ve been to big cities in Asia, it’s no fucking joke. I mean, New York like a hick backwater town moving at a. Pace. You are moving at a pace, sweating at a pace, smelling at a pace, eating at a pace that only 48 years could prepare you for. And my children, ages 10 and 12, just in complete shock. And I’ll tell you this, that the two biggest Google searches for this trip to Korea were hash browns and slime cafes. My son needed hash browns every morning for him to feel.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  20:31

The fry, he loves a potato. He likes a fried potato this I know about Kai.

 

SuChin Pak  20:35

And so my brother is like googling hash browns in a two month, two kilometer radius, who knows what two kilometers?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  20:46

And so he needs her slime cafes.

 

SuChin Pak  20:49

She needs her slime cafes. So did I see Korea? Yeah, through a very specific lunch, I could tell you about all the hash browns and slime cafes. So let me put that up for the four people listening that are like, these are my children.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  21:06

You gotta go like, we gotta do these things, and then we can do other things, because there’s no negotiating out of it.

 

SuChin Pak  21:12

Yeah, because my son won’t eat anything, right? And so I didn’t know enough of what was where we were going and where we were to know that my son was going to eat anything the rest of the day, so I had to just get protein in him in the morning, eggs. But he can’t have eggs unless there’s a fried potato next to it. This just is what it is. It’s my fault, and I carry that cross. My brother looked at me the first three days and was like, you’re an idiot. How did you let this happen? And then he got right on to the hash browning, because it’s an immovable rock. And then the rest of the days, you know, there’s so many gorgeous bakeries, you just eat a lot of sugared, you know, croissants. And then nighttime is, hey, cup of ramen in the hotel.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  22:02

No.

 

SuChin Pak  22:02

Because I don’t have the energy. I don’t have it in me.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  22:08

Wow, okay, wait, did you not have like, a proper Korean meal?

 

SuChin Pak  22:14

Of course I did. I did, we got into this routine where, basically we would be out, and then about, like, three o’clock, my kids are like, because it was 100 degrees at 100% humidity in a concrete jungle. And so we would drop them off in the hotel with a cup of ramen, and then my brother and I would scurry to the nearest anything, scarf down dinner, and then get back to the room so.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  22:40

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. How is Jeju Island?

 

SuChin Pak  22:45

Jeju Island is Hawaii.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  22:48

Oh.

 

SuChin Pak  22:49

So if you love Hawaii.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  22:51

I do.

 

SuChin Pak  22:52

Then, yeah, Jeju Island is for you. If you have kids, it’s a paradise, but you know, if you’re like a world traveler, you know, is it? Is it the Maldives? No, no. And I do have to say, hot tip, we stayed in this incredible I thank God I had the foresight. I I booked us into a resort that had a water park in it. And I know that sounds because my kids are obsessed with water parks, and that sounds really disgusting, because generally they are, but not in Asia Korea, not in Jeju. No, I mean, it was incredible, like for adults and kids, like they had as many hot tub shiatsu water areas, as they had slides. It was like another experience. And they’re serving Korean food you’re like, where am I? Like, this is so weird to be eating stinky Korean food, getting hot stone massages at a water park like this is how you do it. So, so there were, there were really great moments with that. And, you know, I didn’t really I shopped, but it was very, very in between all of that and sporadic and shopping in Korea, you know, there’s no list like, if someone’s like, let me share you my list. There’s no list. That list by the time you get there, whenever your trip is is completely null and void.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  24:25

Do you mean items, or do you mean like, it’s like, it’s more smart to be like, go to this shop and then whatever’s in that shop.

 

SuChin Pak  24:31

Shops and items.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  24:32

Oh, even shops. It’s even pointless. But obviously you went to Olive. What is that place? Olive? Olive Young.

 

SuChin Pak  24:39

But went to other places that I got skincare that I felt were better. You know, but the difference between, like, say, filling my my Santa sack in Paris versus Korea is, like, the Korea is for better and worse, like, not edited, so, like, if you. You are in the mood to buy a hat, you’re gonna go into a football field of hats stores, and there’s just gonna be every hat imaginable that you can possibly want, and you have to find your hat. And that’s kind of fun, like, that’s a different type of shopping that’s like, really fun for someone who wants, like, a curated boutique that you know only has four things and like that may not be your jam, but like, you find the $7 hat that you’ve been dreaming of your whole entire life, and then you know you’re thrilled. So, like, that type of shopping is what Korea is about and I can’t wait to go back with no children, to roll up my sleeves, put on rubber boots.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  25:48

Would you describe this as volume shopping? Or because you’re not buying volume, you’re going through volume?

 

SuChin Pak  25:54

Yeah, it’s like a needle in a haystack, okay? And when you find that thing, whether you were looking for it or like, I became obsessed with tote bags I sent you and Tiff some bizarre ones, but it just was so fun and delightful to discover these weird tote bags with nylon, you know, rip cords, you know, embroidered with cupcakes. You know what I mean. Like, there was just something satisfying about seeing that. So, yeah, it’s like, a really fun way to shop, because you don’t know what you’re gonna get. You just, like, dive into like, a pile and, like, something is there, and you’re like, whoa this is so cool. I’m gonna buy 80 of them and give them to everyone. I know it’s like that vibe.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  26:41

There are boutiques, because I see them.

 

SuChin Pak  26:43

Oh for sure, boutiques and and that, yeah, there are, and there are edited boutiques, and they’re gorgeous. And Korea’s the, you know, in some ways, a different type of fashion capital, because so much of the manufacturing happens there. But I don’t know, to me, that wasn’t the fun.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  27:01

Yeah, you’re preparing yourself. You’re pacing yourself for what sort of rat like behavior you and Annie will be up to when you guys go together. Like, this is like, you’re like, oh, you’re like, I’ve done that, whatever. But the the real like sport for you, sport will be doing this tie style, okay, and yeah, got it, got it.

 

SuChin Pak  27:22

And that is a plenty. Like, if you go to Paris, like, there’s no place where you can do that.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  27:27

So you could, you could just do a little bit at a time in between slime cafe and hash brown searching.

 

SuChin Pak  27:34

Yeah, just a little bit, like, throw a cup of noodle, start the clock at two hours. Like, slurp down some beef grilled and then spend an hour just digging.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  27:46

Wow.

 

SuChin Pak  27:47

I can see doing like a full just trip of it’s like an ultra marathon runner, where you just prep for it and and you let all expectations go. Then you swan dive in, and you just hope that your stamina routine that you’ve been working on is gonna carry you through.

 

SuChin Pak  28:16

Kulap, you and I have both been on very intense hair journeys over the years, right? Some of you may remember that I spent much of my 20s at MTV in full Manic Panic, red just tossing pillowcases out of my East Village apartment window every four days, because of the the hair bleed and Ku, let’s we forget you were, you were a blondie. Oh man, for many years.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  28:45

For many years, I looked like a professional wrestler.

 

SuChin Pak  28:49

I was gonna say like a manic pixie dream girl.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  28:54

Okay, sure, sure. That’s a different vantage point. There were moments of that, and then there was moments in between that were a little hull cooking a little crunchy.

 

SuChin Pak  29:03

Well, while every shower drain that I ever touched in my 20s was just looked like Game of Thrones Season currently, yeah,

 

Kulap Vilaysack  29:13

That’s right, the Red Wedding.

 

SuChin Pak  29:15

So what I want to say is that we are no strangers to experimenting with hair, but every so often you gotta come home. You gotta get back to a healthy base so you can be creative again, right? And for me, summer is the perfect time to do a refresh. You’re taking more time for yourself. You’re relaxing. It’s my reset vibe season.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  29:39

And so we’re talking about hair today, yes, and we’re really proud to bring you something that both Su and I have been lucky enough to try out firsthand. We are talking about naturelab Tokyo, which takes Japanese innovation to the next level with their new line of hair treatments. Take care of those dry ends, that fragile breakage you’re seeing at the roots, and get with this addition to your deranged shot.

 

SuChin Pak  30:00

And I’m not talking about the one bottle solution that maybe we all grew up with. I’m talking about a real deep dive into your specific hair health, into scalp health. That gets me excited when I talk about scalp health. That’s like for me, the new frontier. So naturelab Tokyo has come up with an at home routine that combats visible signs of hair aging. What does that mean? Well, does your hair feel thinner? Does it feel coarser, duller? I mean, I’ve been feeling all of that these past few years, same, same. But I’m gonna say using this SCI say, biomimetic peptide Treatment Essence, I noticed a difference right away, like the first time I used it. Now, what is the difference that I noticed? I noticed there was a bounce. There was like a swish in my hair, like a movement in my hair I haven’t seen in a while, yeah, because I just have been feeling very much like a oily sea otter. Is that it’s very descriptive. You get that, yeah, just like a heavy pelt, heavy pelt on my head and I, and this is like a fluffiness, a lightness that from you Swan, that, I noticed from this peptide.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  31:22

Well, let’s get into the science nibblings, nature labs, magic in a bottle size, a biomimetic peptide Treatment Essence advances the proven tradition of scalp care routine with breakthrough science to switch on growth and color at the root like never before. Their team spent 12 years researching the best combinations of powerful ingredients. So, you know, a lot of attention went into perfecting this formula.

 

SuChin Pak  31:45

Yeah, so it makes sense. I love that it’s called, like a peptide Treatment Essence, which sounds like skincare, but it is focused on scalp health, which is the obvious place to start, right when you’re talking about hair health at the literal root. Thank you. They use botanical science. There’s no chemicals, no mineral oil, to quote, help stimulate your hair’s melanin production at the root. So even in graying hairs, natural pigment can be restored. And if you’re not graying yet, it can help with delaying gray onset. And in the few weeks that I’ve been using it, I’ve noticed the texture of my hair, it’s just a little bit softer. And for those listening that don’t know, perimenopausal hair, yes, that’s a thing. It’s it’s very coarse, and gray hair is generally coarse, but even my not, gray hair is coarse. But with this, it almost feels like I have some kind of conditioning treatment in my hair at all times it’s so soft.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  32:49

And I’ve noticed like reduced shedding in the shower, which is a relief for my drains. I also love that it doesn’t have any excess residue or buildup, so it feels like it absorbs right into my scalp.

 

SuChin Pak  33:02

Yeah, you don’t even notice this stuff. We are talking about anti approved products here, visit naturelab.com today, use code add to cart to receive a free travel size of their scalp. Scrub another one of my favorites, by the way, That’s naturelab.com and code Add to Cart.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  33:22

So you went with your son, your daughter, your brother, yeah, yeah. But you came back with more. You had much like when, when you go to Disneyland and you go into the Haunted Mansion, and as you’re leaving at the very end, you got some hitchhikers that joined you.

 

SuChin Pak  33:40

You and I have to stop calling ourselves aunties.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  33:42

Why?

 

SuChin Pak  33:43

Because we don’t live in Asia, and I want to say even outside of this country, but I’m familiar with the Asian culture, so I can say Asia, I would say, I would probably venture saying aunties around the world, we look like Instagram influencers that are wearing thong bikini compared to these talking about how hard life is with our rock hard abs and our gaming cuts. I mean when, when my aunties really understood that my mother wasn’t there, oh, aka, when they picked us up at the airport and really understood that that she wasn’t there, they went into full anti mode and, um, booked themselves on the same return flight as us. Who? What the fuck who does that? Like, how intense is your grip on life expectations and like your own power that you brazenly book yourself on the same return flight and so grown ass mother and her two children and her traumatized, childless brother, think that that is a great idea.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  35:09

Well, I’m gonna say what, what I think is the issues that they saw, the writing in the wall that your mom was never gonna come back, and they had to, yeah, that they felt that time was of the essence. You know, you were gonna be their chaperone, and you continue to be the chaperone.

 

SuChin Pak  35:30

Which is why it went dark for till June 30, they just left. You know what I mean? Like, they came suitcases full of just like stinky, stinky Korean panchan, sesame oils, crackers, moon pies, custard cakes. Came two giant suitcases, pair of underwear and a tracksuit.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  36:05

Well, you look, I mean, that’s genetics for you, you know, we wonder where suchin gets her packing style?

 

SuChin Pak  36:11

Oh, no, I am, but I am but a daisy flower. What with Virgin do, when I’m with them, yeah, when I’m with them, they’re like this, this mentally challenged moron. Did she birth two children? She certainly can’t feed them.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  36:28

She survived in the world.

 

SuChin Pak  36:29

Certainly can’t. They’re like, you drive? Yeah, they can’t believe it. That doesn’t sound safe.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  36:35

They thought you were a Make A Wish candidate in Korea. They’re so surprised.

 

SuChin Pak  36:40

They’re so surprised.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  36:42

How many came? How many ouncies?

 

SuChin Pak  36:44

Two of the four came representative. Two of the four came representative. I mean, and to try to explain to them that they’re going to be flying into LAX but then also be driving two and a half hours into the countryside where they shan’t see another Asian person until they get back on that flight.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  37:04

Yeah, and they’re so happy that they packed that much food, by the way.

 

SuChin Pak  37:08

Oh, they they packed that much because I told them. And they were like, Oh, no problem, yeah, it just to see them in action day one, like they first of all, slept the entire flight. The entire $400 Uber ride to Ventura before my husband picked us up in his camper van. They’re like so Americans drive cars with kitchens […] my kids are sleeping in the van, in the in the bed. I know that’s unsafe, come at me, but there weren’t enough seats. My answer in the in the two seats that my kids are on, I’m in the front. Kids are passed out from not sleeping on a flight. And I’m wondering if they’re like so these American, boneless globs of children just sleep in cars again. They’re like, this lady is not fit, yeah, to be in charge of anything like, that’s why they’re like, let us get on a plane and assess for ourselves, what our older sister is dealing with. Like, I need to see for mine eyes, the true auntie eyes, like, what is happening? They’re like, What do you mean? You couldn’t get her on a flight.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  38:24

What did you mean? And what was your mother’s reaction?

 

SuChin Pak  38:27

I think my mother spent the first few days, like, really overwhelmed. Because, like I said, these two ladies came in with visors, prescription sunglasses and gold chains and declared one declared, I’m allergic to dust.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  38:48

Okay, and okay.

 

SuChin Pak  38:50

Proceeded to strip a house down like a locust On an antelope in the Savannah. You, you want to see what clean looks like. Is an auntie from Korea, straight off of a flight, who’s allergic to dust.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  39:10

Wow.

 

SuChin Pak  39:12

Like just stripped it down to its carcass. I mean, they’re, they’re just on their hands and knees because they don’t know how to use a bona mop.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  39:21

And this is, this is your, your mom’s place.

 

SuChin Pak  39:24

Yes, and you know, they’re just like cooking and cleaning. I mean, it’s like the old lady in the shoe with like the and there’s like a lid on the and it’s just like, there’s like steam coming out of it, because there’s so much stew being cooked and boiled, and rags being boiled. And they were like, what do you mean aryer? Who has time for that? Get it, there’s sun here in this land.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  39:51

That that actually takes more time, but okay.

 

SuChin Pak  39:54

Yeah, get me a get me a drying rack. You know? They call me. They’re like, we need jar. So we need more jars. I got them a bunch of mason jars for all the lemons that they were preserving because I couldn’t imagine, like, all these lemon trees. Like, what do you mean? Nobody eats these lemons? I’m like, well, it’s impossible to eat 400 lemons a month. They’re like, so what do they what happens? What happens? I’m like, I don’t know. They fall on the ground. They thrown away? Did they go home with no less than six jars of preserved lemons? I mean, Kuku town.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  40:29

I don’t know, I mean, I get it.

 

SuChin Pak  40:31

Oh, wait, I do have to say Ku, another affirming thing. Listen, I know I’m cheap, but am I? I saw the type of behavior in Korea that that I engage in, that my parents have made into, like, a lifelong legacy played out on a national stage by everyone involved, and I, and I, and I was like, Holy fuck, am I cheap, or am I Korean?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  40:58

I like this game. I like this game that we’re developing.

 

SuChin Pak  41:01

Guess what? I ain’t cheap.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  41:04

I’m Korean.

 

SuChin Pak  41:06

I am Korean. I’m gonna leave you with this example that, just like, blew my mind. Last meal in Korea. We’re at a hotel. We’re leaving for the airport breakfast buffet. So it’s a it’ll be the last meal that they have for 14 hours. I’m like, let’s get to the breakfast buffet. We get down there. I’m like, we’ve got one hour to eat. Make sure our bags are downstairs. And I get there, and the lady’s like, saying something in Korean that I can’t understand. And I’m like, we just want to eat at the breakfast buffet. And I’m saying it in Korean. And she’s just like, well, blah, blah. And it sounds like she can’t, we can’t. And I’m like, flabbergasted. I’m like, what the and I’m looking at her and I and I was like, pull out my credit card, and I’m like, I can’t just pay for breakfast. And she was like, oh, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Here sit. She was saying to me that like, Oh no, no, you didn’t prepay for your breakfast, or have a coupon or you prepay breakfast at a discounted rate, right, and so you can’t have breakfast. It didn’t even occur to her that I would willingly choose to pay.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  42:12

Full price.

 

SuChin Pak  42:15

It did not occur to her two children, one grown child and another mother child downstairs being like, we need to eat urgent bags, hands flailing. I don’t understand what you’re saying. Didn’t even occur to her that anyone I would want to.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  42:33

Would pay full price, because your morons would be if you did.

 

SuChin Pak  42:39

And I just that. I kept thinking about that on the flight back, like, what was that that just say something about it? Like, something clicked inside my brain, and I just was like, holy shit.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  42:50

She’s like, no, if you didn’t prepay and you don’t have a coupon, you can’t eat coupon.

 

SuChin Pak  42:54

You can’t eat here. I’m like, does she mean there’s no credit cards accepted? I’m like, pulling out all the cash at this moment in time. Like, back to the wall. Like, I am married to a white man living in Santa Barbara. It will throw money at the Yeah, back to the wall sure. And guess what, where that wall is, is my product, but when I have two children about to get on a, you know, 11 hour flight, 12 hour flight. I’m like, I don’t care, charge me, anything. Just let me finish this.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  43:27

No, it’s the same energy of like, we got to find these hash browns. It’s the same, you know, like it’s got.

 

SuChin Pak  43:33

And and it does never, and that wouldn’t, didn’t occur to this college.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  43:39

No, your your cheapness always is when you have time. That’s when you’re hemming and hawing, adding the cart, sitting on it, looking for discounts. That’s when you that’s you grazing, okay, not in moments of stress and like, where there’s a time limit.

 

SuChin Pak  43:54

Time is truly the most expensive asset that I have. Yeah, that is, that’s really the less it gets, really expensive, yeah, the less time I have. You’re right, you’re absolutely right. My aunties, they ate two meals out. I was able to get them to two meals before they shut that show down. I’m gonna take you to a beach cafe. It’s on the beach, like we saw on the beach two days ago. But we can no, but we can eat. No, no, we’ll eat here. And you can drive by the beach, but we don’t. I mean, like, it was hilarious. I was like, well, we’re gonna go on this other trail, trail. We walked another. We walked a trail yesterday. Well, how, what? How many more trip, how many more trees can I see before I know that all trees look the same. I mean, it was, I was like, wow, so you’re, you were just here to cook and clean, yeah, like you. I tried to take them to Lotus Land. I tried to take them on hikes. I try. I got them to do one of each, and then they were like, enough already.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  44:58

Is your mom, the oldest?

 

SuChin Pak  45:01

Yeah, that’s right. They’re here to surf her.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  45:03

They’re here to surf her and to see her.

 

SuChin Pak  45:05

yeah. And they’re and they look at the way that we eat out and and, like, spend money just because, hey, it’s a treaty. Treat yourself. You know, self care. They’re like, you won’t survive the night, like, like, we need to move on with what will survive. And they just think it’s complete ridiculousness that I would want to pay for food when there’s food at home.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  45:33

In the end, because they just they laughed recently. Like, do you think your mom was happy to have that time with them.

 

SuChin Pak  45:41

Oh, yeah. I mean, first four days, she was a bit confused, but once she got into it, oh, it was like, you know, the sad part is that you realize that when you move to a different country in the way that our parents did what you end up giving up. Was it worth it? I mean, I look at my mom, and I’m like, wow, the loss of family, of community, of safety, of security, seeing what she could have had and what she has now, if I had, like, some magic wand and could redo it for her, she would never leave. She wouldn’t have left. Like, there’s four sisters in this family, and they all live near each other, and they’re at each other’s houses all the time, and they’re bustling back and forth. Hey, I bought a box of pears, but I’m only gonna need four. I’m dropping off the eight at your house, and then I’m gonna go to little sister’s house and drop off two for her, someone’s visiting. Okay, I’ve got extra, you know what? I mean, like, it’s all hands on deck.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  46:49

It’s a sliding doors type situation, because it’s like they made the best choice they could at the time that they had there was, you know, it’s hard. It’s really hard, of course, and even for you, you know, like the opportunity to have for you would have, it would have been less. It really would have. It’s a highly, way more patriarchal society than even this one that we’re in.

 

SuChin Pak  47:13

Yes, oh no.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  47:14

It’s, it’s just tough, it’s hard, it’s hard.

 

SuChin Pak  47:18

Yeah, no, because I was, you’re like, I would never have been on television. I would never had the career. I never had the freedom, and that, of course, like for me as a person, like I have only benefited, like I’ve greatly benefited from being.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  47:33

And I’m not taking away from what you are describing, which is like, how small and lonelier your parents life is without that support, without that village.

 

SuChin Pak  47:43

Yeah, that loss is there with them way more than it is with us. Like I can’t I can’t even imagine what my life would have been like growing up in in Korea.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  47:53

You barely want to see your friends. You moved all the way to Santa Barbara to avoid all of us. Oh, my God, no. There’s major heartache that’s that’s part of the generational trauma, that’s, that’s, that’s the oil to the fire. Is that loss, that heartbreak, as I said, changed every cell. So how does that manifest itself on your day to day? Santa Barbara, life, summer’s your favorite season. Is our footfall a little lighter? Or is it heavier in the heel? I mean, what’s what?

 

SuChin Pak  48:23

No, it’s definitely lighter.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  48:26

Oh.

 

SuChin Pak  48:28

It’s definitely lighter. Well, right now I’m just like, I did it. I went through that. I’m changed. I checked that off my bucket list of wanting my children to experience that, and they loved it, which is hard to hear, to be honest times, because you’re like, oh, that’s great, but there is a part and it’s like, wow, you really loved it. And it took a lot for you to love it, but my brother and I had to really feather their bed, I joke, but it’s just funny, because when I came back and that first night, I was like, Holy shit, my aunties are here. I did that to my brother, like, what is going on? Just trying to process it all, and having jet lag and my son going like, that was the best trip ever, and I just can’t go there yet. You know, I’m like, was it hash brown man? Was it the best trip?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  49:26

This came up when you and soy went to Mexico. In Mexico, she was able to eat on the bed, eat call room service. That was, this is a novelty for her. In Santa, Barbara, he he doesn’t get hashbrowns every day. No, he got every day. So, like, that was fucking awesome.

 

SuChin Pak  49:49

It was really cute because I recently, I said, well, like, give me the top 10 things you loved about it, and six of the top thing things were him, just naming relatives.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  49:59

Wow.

 

SuChin Pak  50:00

You know Max, you know me on little Auntie 1234, and I just thought that was really cute like, yeah, we don’t have family here, you know, so when we have family gatherings, it’s just me and you know my parents and my brother, you know, who doesn’t have kids, and so it’s just my kids. And so for them to be in this big group of, like, loud screaming people shoving food in their mouth, they went and got french fries every time they cooked dinner for us. You know what I mean? Because they’re like, the American boy, he only eats french fries.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  50:38

It’s amazing.

 

SuChin Pak  50:39

And so, yeah, and so you feel that. I mean, I’m sure as a kid, they were just like, whoa. This is a crazy experience. Like, I’ve never been part of that, so it was amazing. And, like, I think we’re all changed in some ways. Like, for sure, will I be bringing them back anytime soon?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  50:56

No, absolutely not. I think that’s will I go back myself a lot?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  51:00

I like to hear that a lot. You said it was gonna be the, you know, we’re not going back to Paris this year.

 

SuChin Pak  51:00

Yes, a lot.

 

SuChin Pak  51:08

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  51:09

We’re gonna go to you and Annie are gonna go to Korea, right? Like, that’s the plan.

 

SuChin Pak  51:12

Yeah, yeah. I think, I think it’s Asia for a while.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  51:16

Oh.

 

SuChin Pak  51:18

I gotta really put on some Spanx and get into some galoshes over there. Wait, okay, I know we have to wrap up, but please, do we have time for one thing in your cart?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  51:32

All right, Su, I I’m getting surgery in August. I am getting my eyes done, and I’m getting implants, and it’s just what you think. I’m gonna get double D eyeballs so that whenever I see a nice butt, I’ll go awooga, a wooga. Face right now, so pissed. Okay, so I have horrible eyesight.

 

SuChin Pak  51:59

Oh, you’re getting an Oh god, you are such a little trickster. Oh, my Lord. I mean, you’ve never sounded more white. Literally, all the Asian just drained out of me, because when an Asian person says they’re getting their eyes done, a lot of images come.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  52:18

Anybody says they’re getting my eyes on. Trust me, when I texted this to Matt Casey and June, they were like. What are you saying? What are you saying right now?

 

SuChin Pak  52:30

You’re getting what that LASIK?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  52:32

Yeah. I was like, yeah, sorry, guys.

 

SuChin Pak  52:33

Okay, yeah great, all right, 2001 comes around great.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  52:37

Yeah, well, it’s not LASIK, because my eyesight is so poor, there’s no surface area.

 

SuChin Pak  52:44

I’m so glad you’re doing this. What took you so long?

 

Kulap Vilaysack  52:47

It was such a weird thing that I just kind of decided to do this. Procedure is called ICL, and with ICL, it’s implantable contact lens. They are going to put a contact lens in my eye, both my eyes.

 

SuChin Pak  53:03

And that’s permanent.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  53:06

So LASIK is permanent. And this isn’t because you can go, you can change them out or take them out if you want to. I just have been thinking my eyesight is so I am legally blind. Like it’s is so bad that, like, I can’t if my contacts and my glasses are off. I mean, I can’t see much on my nose, like it really is. There’s no no sharpness whatsoever.

 

SuChin Pak  53:31

Terrifying.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  53:32

Just like with Emmy like, if I need that second and I drop my glasses or I need to, I’m not a strong swimmer because of that, too, I can’t. There’s no seeing in the water like so I just started thinking about that. And then went to the Maloney shamey Vision Institute, which apparently is very reputable, talked to the surgeon. I’ve just been taking steps to get ready for it, which included going to a retina specialist, because the surgeon saw that, like my retina, and it’s just wear and tear, but that it was on both of my eyes pretty loose. So there’s like, a before I can do the surgery that has to, I have to be cleared. And when I went to that specialist, the retina specialist, he was like, in my left eye, he was like, oh, there’s, like scar tissue, and I think there’s a hole in there already, so it’s like, almost like a good thing that I went at the time that I did it, because it was gonna detach, and I’ve already lasered that retina. Like, two weeks ago, I he fixed my left retina, and it was the wildest experience, because he was like, he put some gunk in my eye, and then he just saw a green light. And he’s like, how was it? And I was like, Oh, are we starting? He’s like, yeah. I was like, oh, okay, yeah, I guess fine. Like, they dilated. It, there’s numbing stuff. It was such a weird sensation. Super bright and, then it’s just sort of like, what I could hear was just like crunching, which nobody wants that, but that’s what happened.

 

SuChin Pak  55:07

Is it like looking at an eclipse? Oh, boy.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  55:11

Possibly.

 

SuChin Pak  55:14

Because this is sounding really familiar.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  55:16

Yeah, I’m going back to do my right eye in a couple weeks, and then, yeah, I’m gonna get this, like, it’s gonna be such a huge shift in my life, because I’ve had glasses since I was in third grade, and I’ve had, you know, contacts since I was in middle school, or something like that. Like, I had gas permeable, like, hard contact lenses. So it’s like, I’m really looking forward to it. This is not covered by insurance at all. This is completely elective. And also, I just was, like, freaked out about, like, just, you know, cutting my eyeball, eyeballs but, like, this has been around for 30 years. Unlike LASIK, there’s no like dry eye situation at all. Now I will still have to get readers inevitably, because that’s just deterioration of the eye. It’s not like a catch all fix. They were like, oh, do you want to do like monovision, where one eye is your lead eye, and that’s for distance, the other eye would be for reading. And I was like, I’m gonna fall over like, I can’t. I don’t want to do that. I’d rather. I don’t care. I’d rather have readers like you guys don’t understand what an improvement this will be in terms of for sight for me, like I it’s not that I hate wearing glasses, it’s that I simply cannot see like it is. So that’s that so what I said, I know I’m being cheeky when I say I’m getting my eyes done. I was being […]

 

SuChin Pak  56:49

I had so many quests I would I saw that. And I said, this is for tomorrow. Your eyes are not to be reading her cart. This is for tomorrow.

 

Kulap Vilaysack  56:58

Wow, wow, wow. What an episode, here we are returned. The band’s back together. You can find everything on our carts, in the show notes and on our Instagram @AddtoCartpod, I don’t even know if there’s things that items that we even brought up, so we might have to scrounge up some links here, but make sure you go to add @addtocartpod. […] Do you have links for that? To links for those cool to pay?

 

SuChin Pak  57:25

No, I have so many […]

 

Kulap Vilaysack  57:27

Photos of it, take photos, bye guys.

 

SuChin Pak  57:32

Bye.

 

CREDITS  57:34

There’s more Add to cart with Lemonada Premium subscribers get exclusive access to bonus content, like where we tell you about the last item we bought or returned and why subscribe now in Apple podcasts. Add to cart is a production of Lemonada media. Our producers are Keegan Zema and Tiffany Boy. Bobby Woody is our engineer. Theme music is by Wasabi and produced by LA Made It and Oh So Familiar with additional music by APM music. Executive Producers are Kulap Vilaysack, SuChin Pak, Jessica Cordova Kramer and Stephanie Wittels Wachs. Be sure to check out all the items we mentioned today on our Instagram @AddtoCartpod. Follow Add to Cart wherever you get your podcast, or listen ad free on Amazon Music with your Prime membership.