When Harry Met Olivia

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Description

Kiki kicks it off with the story of her wild weekend involving a boozy brunch, a busty bartender, some risqué texts, and a plate of cold chicken wings. Then, the hosts react to Olivia Wilde getting served on stage at CinemaCon, and Hoja lays out the tight timeline between the actress’s breakup with Jason Sudeikis and her new relationship with Harry Styles. Mohanad breaks down what’s been going on with Taylor Lorenz and Libs of TikTok, and tells the story of the time he was doxxed after a viral incident with border patrol. Plus, Kiki takes a ride in a Tesla, Hoja gets a free meal, and Mohanad goes to jail on this week’s Sorry Not Sorry.

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Transcript

SPEAKERS

Hoja Lopez, Mohanad Elshieky, Kiki Monique

Kiki Monique  00:00

Hi I’m Kiki Monique. And this is I’M SORRY, a podcast about apologies. And this week I bought my first major appliance.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Amazing. This is Mohanad Elshieky, and this week I have not bought anything, which I’m very proud of.

Hoja Lopez 

Wow. It’s a miracle and then I’m Hoja Lopez. And this week, I just want to say a quick thank you to the patriarchy for having a series of men pick up my very heavy luggage for me. God bless you. It works sometimes.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yes to men.

Hoja Lopez 

And each week here at I’M SORRY, we unpack the latest and greatest in pop culture, and celebrity drama and the messy world of public apologies. And this week, first of all, I would like to talk to Kiki because it seems like you had a very fun weekend

Kiki Monique 

That I did. I ate chicken wings for breakfast. They were cold. I didn’t even, I don’t even have a microwave right now because I just moved and they I normally I hate cold food. But it was the only thing I had leftover in my fridge. And so I just ate cold chicken wings. Because I am, I won’t say I’m wildly hungover. But it’s like because I’m not like ill, right? Like, I’m not like, I don’t feel nauseous or anything. But I’m like wildly hungover in that like, I could possibly still be drunk. I don’t know. Because I don’t think I would now be realizing how much alcohol I consumed me. I was supposed to just go to a Sunday fun day brunch. It was just a brunch. It was like first. I haven’t been to brunch in so long. I think I got excited about going to brunch.

Hoja Lopez

It’s honestly exhilarating. riveting.

Kiki Monique  01:56

And the part of town it was in. It was I had discovered this new dive bar. Because you know, like, when you leave Brooklyn, like in Brooklyn, I had like my go to dive bar. And like, you know, they knew my name. And like, I’ve been on the hunt for like, the perfect dive bar in Los Angeles. And I just like hadn’t really found it. It was like, oh, there’s elements of this one I like but I don’t like this part of it. There’s elements of this one. This one was like has I felt like it had it all. And I was like, oh, we’re in that part of town. Let’s go to this. This dive bar mind you, opens at 6am.

Hoja Lopez  02:30

Oh, that’s right. That is coming. Correct. Just actually already.

Kiki Monique 

And it has this beautiful. I just I just call her this beautiful bartender, she reminds me of like old school Hollywood. She’s got this like, blonde, just really big hair. It’s just like, and she’s just got these like, huge boobs. And she’s just got like, she’s just immaculate. She’s perfect. And she is like, this amazing bartender and I wanted to see her again and bring my friend with me. And I don’t know we got there when it was still light. And I don’t know when I got home. It was very dark.

Hoja Lopez

I love that. You’re like not even looking at your watch. You’re like your basic caveman human timeless. You’re like, it was bright before. It’s dark now. So wait, so they didn’t even bamboozle you into a second like location. This was all at one location that you did this damage?

Kiki Monique

no, I moved. I moved brunch to the dive bar. Like I was like, oh, let’s continue on. Okay, okay, because I was like, we’ve had this great brunch. We’re in this part of town. I know this dive bar that’s close by. Let’s check it out. Because I’m usually not in this part of town. And since I am and I love this bar, let’s go.

Hoja Lopez 

Wow, second location after brunch is brave. That’s to me is a very brave move.

Mohanad Elshieky

It is literally like almost no chance for me to go to a second location. Like, the second we I hung out with like any friends. It does not matter how close we are. Like, I’m just like, okay, that’s it. If we’re leaving this place, I am going home, one thing about me, I love being in my apartment. So much fucking love it.

Kiki Monique  04:16

I love being in the apartment. But when you get me out, it’s like getting me back in will be even harder because like once I’m having fun and I’m out like I won’t go home and like that’s exactly what happened. Like I was like, just like one more drink. Just one more in this bar. Let me tell you the price is right. And the pour is I mean, it’s just to the tippy top. Like you have to sit down when you lean over to it. Like so full.

Hoja Lopez 

That’s pretty amazing.

Kiki Monique 

It was but like then, you know, I forget we record early on Mondays.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, we do.

Hoja Lopez 

Welcome to your job Kiki.

Mohanad Elshieky

Yeah, exactly. Perfect job.

Kiki Monique  05:01

But like, I just I woke up like, my, you know, when your mouth is just so dry, you can’t even move your tongue around. I was like, I like, you know, get to the fridge, drink some water. And then I start looking at my phone and there’s like, I had forgotten like the girl I was with she left a little bit earlier than me and I stayed like, this is what I’m talking about, like, I continue to stay to talk to this dude, I guess I was talking to because it’s like, also been so long since I’ve like, met a boy.

Hoja Lopez 

The plot thickens.

Kiki Monique

She likes, you know, are you okay? Are you good? And I’m like, yeah, yeah, girl, I’m good. Like, you got the Uber. I was like, you know, like, in the Uber. I was like, you know, make sure you text me when you get home, you know? And then like, I don’t hear from her. So I’m like texting like, are you home? And then like, I think I don’t know if I started it. Like if I started texting people being like, have you heard from her? Because I hadn’t heard from her. So then it was a chain of like, me and her friend and her mom, because we were all making sure she got home. And then, then I passed out which is makes me a terrible friend because I never, I woke up luckily and she was home like I didn’t get that she had passed out top, that’s why I didn’t get the text, so she had passed out to so when she did get it she’s like I did. I’m home. But then I also woke up to this like gnarly text from the guest I gave that dude my number. I can’t even repeat what he said to me.

Hoja Lopez  06:29

Okay? Contextually like what is a metaphor for it? Like if you just had to, if you had to clock a theme to the text, like what would the theme be?

Kiki Monique 

Porn? It was very pornographic.

Hoja Lopez 

Was it, […]

Kiki Monique 

No, there was no pictures. It was all words.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Well, good thing is now we know who’s gonna be our guest next week. So he’d come in the random dude.

Hoja Lopez 

So wait, so he sent you like, romantic poetry? Like what was the vibe of it?

Kiki Monique 

if I was going to explain it. Using emojis it would probably be like an eggplant next to a peach.

Hoja Lopez 

Ah, so that is a theme. That’s a very overarching theme. Have you replied yet?

Kiki Monique

No. Absolutely not. I’m thinking of blocking. Should I block? I don’t know.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I think you should reply with find God and then block him.

Kiki Monique

He was cute, though. But like..

Hoja Lopez 

But not cute enough to immediately get into that territory, essentially.

Kiki Monique

Yeah, you know, I will say that like when I got vaxxed I like did get wax and I was like, ready for like the hot girls summer but like, I haven’t kept it up. I in fact, I have not what I’m not prepared to me boys. I’m like, I’m mentally prepared.

Hoja Lopez  08:03

You know what, Kiki, I’m tired of this. He is doing the bare minimum for you. And he is his version of it. They got you is sending you romantic poetry. That’s what I’m calling dirty text from now on. But and then you feel like you have to wax for that, if he’s gonna do the bare minimum, you should be able to show up in your full glory and be like, what? What do you have to say about it? You know?

Kiki Monique

You’re right. I’m a bad feminist.

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, well, welcome to the party. I haven’t dated anybody. And I haven’t gone out in you know, almost six years because of my partner. She’s the one that’s stopping me she’s holding me back. I can’t even imagine, like, do you feel like it’s like, dating has changed a lot from like, six years ago to now I guess, like 2000. And, you know, 16, or something?

Kiki Monique 

I like, was in my last relationship for so long. And then like, after that I was so not interested in being in a relationship because it’s like, you know, like, at that point, I was like, I don’t ever want to live with anyone again. And it was like, over it. Like, I go on apps, just to make myself feel better and know that I’m still hot and people still want to talk to me, and then I ghost them all.

Mohanad Elshieky

I as a person now do not have the capacity to even make new friends. Like literally I’m like, I’m at a point now where I’m just like, do not introduce any new people into my life. Like I have enough friends. And you know, I’ve been with Rosie for like, four years now. And I’m like, that’s enough people that I have in my life. I feel like if you introduce more people I’m just gonna be like, hey, sorry, like you’re too late like you literally this door closed years ago.

Kiki Monique 

I’m glad we made the cut off then.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Well, of course, yeah. No, absolutely. There’s a contract between us too. The law had to interfere for me to add new people into my life.

Hoja Lopez  10:12

I get that completely. I will say, recently I went out, like is before I was in LA but I hung out with a friend and it was gonna be a one-on-one thing. And then they brought two friends with them. And I was like, no, it’s so different to hang out with one person that you know really well and to be prepared for that interaction. And then for the interaction to change.

Mohanad Elshieky

I know, I got like, invited to a dinner, maybe like, last week, to this friend’s place. And it was me and two other friends that I knew that we. So we went there together. And I was expecting it to be the four of us. And it was, I’d say, 18 people.

Hoja Lopez 

You went to a party?

Kiki Monique 

Did you have a panic attack?

Mohanad Elshieky 

I got the opposite of panic attack, which is just like I just like, everything inside of me just froze.

Hoja Lopez 

Your body functions slow down, your body temperature lowered

Mohanad Elshieky 

head empty just vibes, you know, just like, I cannot believe that I have been tricked into hanging out with a group of people. And also to like, I mean, that party was good. I still had a good time. But like, sometimes like you go somewhere. And it’s not just that you want to be mentally prepared for the people who are gonna be there. Sometimes there are people you’re just not interested in talking to. Like, if you’re like, let’s say you work at like an accounting firm or something. And you’ve added like your coworker from that. I don’t want to hang out with them. Let’s talk about what, numbers

Hoja Lopez

are you vetted one girl out because she every time you talk to her, she just looks at the door to see who’s walking in. Or like you’ve vetted another girl out because every time she finds you, she corners you and tries to talk to you about politics endlessly at a fun party. I mean, there’s so many reasons as to why I would not hang out with people again. And so parties. Yeah, I don’t know.

Mohanad Elshieky  12:03

For me, there’s always like someone who would like hear that I do stand-up comedy. And then they just have a list of questions. And also, they always begin with, I would never do this. And I’m like, okay, so, since we’ve established that you would never want to do stand-up comedy. Why am I answering any of these?

Hoja Lopez 

You have, like the most popular profession in America. Like the most like I think design like everybody I feel wishes they could do stand-up comedy.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Oh, yeah. Even the richest man in the world, Elon Musk. That’s literally all he wants for people to laugh at his dumb jokes.

Hoja Lopez 

Did you see that stupid comeback issue with like, on Twitter between him and AOC.

Kiki Monique 

No, I did not.

Hoja Lopez 

Oh my god. She just tweeted something. And he was like, stop flirting with me already, AOC, and she’s like, I was talking about Mark Zuckerberg but fine. It’s fine. If you want to make it about yourself.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I’m sorry. Like, I know obviously, you know, this is like sexism a fucked-up thing to say to a woman who literally just a congress person. But even like, outside of that, outside of let’s just like look at them as like a two people, their personalities, everything and like first of all, this woman is out of your league. Let’s just start there. You look like a slice of cheese.

Kiki Monique 

Wait, is there a particular slice of cheese? He looks like, I’m curious.

Mohanad Elshieky

just like the blandest slice of cheese that you can think of just like a block of cheese that is just like literally you look at him like I can’t even tell what kind of cheese this is. And this is why, he is and I’m like your personality sucks, you don’t know even know how to talk you will literally appeared on SNL they gave you stuff to say and even then you could not like look the part of sound like appealing by any means. And you’re telling me this woman, this woman is hitting on you, this young woman who is a congress person who’s like way better than you are like in so many aspects. And this is your comeback and obviously like he has like followers are just like yeah, she likes him just like a bunch of fucking […] like Jesus Christ.

Kiki Monique  14:10

What amount of money do you think you surpass in your net worth when you believe that you are any woman is attainable?

Hoja Lopez 

Better question. How much money would somebody have to pay you, Kiki, in order to get with them? What is the minimum amount of money that you would take?

Kiki Monique 

Girl, I am a cheap date. I need to take lunch. I’m not gonna lie. Okay, how long do I have to like drive to maintain a long-term relationship?

Hoja Lopez  14:46

I would say long term relationship. Yeah, like let’s say a year.

Kiki Monique

A year. Okay. I mean for a year, easily, the lowest amount let’s be real, let’s be real. Okay. For a year I lowest that go. I probably would do it for 250, food for $50,000

Hoja Lopez 

Okay. for one whole year.

Kiki Monique 

I mean, like, I can say it would be 10 million, but then if you kept counting down, they would probably be not a number I’d say no to, like, might even say 70 grand. And I might still say yes.

Hoja Lopez

That sounds like a nice corporate job. This is cushy. I would say just because it would probably blow up my relationship that I currently have that I really enjoy. And I’m taking into account in terms of selling my body and my time and my affection. I would say, and I’m so sorry, Rachel, but maybe like, like 5 million.

Kiki Monique 

You value yourself.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Well, I gotta be the better person here and say that you cannot pay me enough.

Kiki Monique 

If your answers don’t perfectly describe each of our personalities, I don’t know.

Hoja Lopez  16:06

And you know what, Mohanad, that’s why you’re never gonna be a sugar baby. That’s never gonna happen to you. Because as soon as you start here, and sugar baby thoughts and sugar baby ideas, you’re gonna walk right out of there. And I respect that. I do love the concept of a sugar baby. I think it’s fun.

Kiki Monique 

I love the concept of that. I love the concept of an indecent proposal.

Hoja Lopez 

Hey, you have an indecent proposal on your phone right now that you are refusing to text back.

Kiki Monique 

Well, you know what, I probably will because you know, I’m saying I won’t. I probably will.

Hoja Lopez 

So I was really well, the Jason Sudeikis and Olivia Wilde thing. And, you know, what actually happened was that I entered a profound and deep Harry Styles, Deep Dive. And then I thought to myself, This is what happened to Olivia Wilde as well. She was with Jason Sudeikis having a good life, right. And she started a movie, and it’s hairstyles, and Florence Pugh. And then once you’re in the Harry Styles world, you can’t help but be sucked into the vortex of his charm, and his beauty and his beautiful boy sheath.

Kiki Monique 

Well, what I never what was the timeline was Olivia still with Jason when she met Harry or does she have..

Hoja Lopez 

Okay, yeah, so they met they she started filming a September. Then her and Jason Sudeikis announced their split two months afterwards in November. And then in at the end of I think January or February, they saw the pictures of Olivia and Harry seeing each other, dating each other. So the timeline is tight.

Mohanad Elshieky

Yeah, that’s like a John Mulaney to Olivia Munn kind of thing. Which is like, okay, you either knew this person before and you like had those thoughts, or you’re just so fucking quick. You break up with someone and immediately just find someone else which is, you know?

Kiki Monique  18:19

I just also say for a second, Olivia Munn and Olivia. I thought they were all the same person for so long. I was like, I was like, Olivia, which you live? I just didn’t know which Olivia belong to where? Who did what?

Mohanad Elshieky 

And I do not care to know.

Hoja Lopez 

Okay. Wait a second. I don’t care about Olivia Munn very much. But I do love Olivia Wilde. I love Olivia Wilde deeply. Did I love her before she became a director. I thought she was a cool actress and whatever. But I didn’t really care. But as soon as she directed Booksmart I was like, Oh, I’m all in like, this is my bitch, which I’m sorry, Olivia, which is a term of endearment. I hope you know that. But yeah, it seems like it was a tight thing. And so this whole thing with the with the serving thing, which I didn’t even realize, like I don’t know anything about being served. Wow, brag, okay.

Mohanad Elshieky 

The only reason I know about me like the term served is from watching so much law and order as for you, 23 seasons. Did I watch rewatch all of them during the pandemic? Maybe, who’s to know? But they love doing that. They love just being like detective Olivia Benson, yeah, you’ve been served. Yeah, and they just do it like in like rent like they just like and this is like why did not surprise me that it happened to Olivia Wilde at the like a theater because like on SVU they just serve you like in the weirdest places possible. You’re literally with your child at the park and they’re like you been served like how did you find this person like this is insane to me.

Hoja Lopez  20:02

You’re rappelling down a waterfall and a guy drops down next to you and he’s like you’ve been served

Mohanad Elshieky

You’re parachuting and then someone else’s parachuting next to you and they just come feel like you reserved. They just like fly away.

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, yeah. It’s like they’ll do anything to get you.

Mohanad Elshieky

And I think they enjoy it. I think you’ll really enjoy it. They just like just like surprising people like in just like random places.

Kiki Monique

I think that’s why like, I think subconsciously when I hear when people I don’t automatically turn if I hear my name being said, I keep walking and pretend like I don’t hear because I’m always thinking that somebody’s trying to serve me maybe. And I’m like, going, I don’t know that person.

Hoja Lopez  20:43

Your paranoia around cancellation and lawsuits is spectacular. I mean, you are in the business of maybe like some, you’re in the arena of defamation, you might say something. Your next tattoo should just say allegedly. That way, you can just like flash it. And you’re like, I was saying it the whole time.

Mohanad Elshieky 

And then people are talking like she would like serve on stage while like she would like introduce, talking about her upcoming movie, right?

Hoja Lopez 

So she was like, Comicon or some kind of like..

Mohanad Elshieky 

Someone approached her while she was on stage just handed her the whole like thing. And she thought it was a script or something. Which was like, if someone like, did you think someone was asking you to read the script right now? Like, what’s happening? But here’s what I think though. I think this person who serves her was just like, okay, what I can do is, I get to attend CinemaCon, I pay for the ticket, I get to do everything. And then I’ll just build my client. And I will do this shit. I’ll wait for you until like you’re like at the most expensive thing that I can now afford and just go there and bill someone else for it. Like, I’ll fucking serve people at the Met Gala. If I can.

Kiki Monique  22:11

Well, I mean, like it just okay. I was confused by the story one because I was like, why are you serving each other over custody? Like, I felt like, I didn’t realize they weren’t married. I thought they had been married. And I didn’t realize they were just, you know, domestic partnership. They never actually legally got married. So I guess the custody was because there was no marriage. And maybe there was no custody. I don’t know. It felt like it came so much later, after they broke up. I didn’t understand that part. And then it was just confusing, because I was like, you have to know where she lives because you have kids together, there’s drop off like..

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, I’m gonna chalk this one up to Jason not knowing I believe him, I think it’s fine. But I know that they interviewed Olivia. And essentially, it’s she sort of like, you know, a source who knows who the sources they could just be making the whole thing up. But they basically such that she was like, angry, and she wanted the focus to be on the film that she had worked on. And not just in her personal life, which must be a frustrating thing. If you’re an actor or a director, and then all of a sudden your life comes ahead of this project that you’ve worked so hard on.

Kiki Monique 

Look, I love Ted Lasso and I do like Jason Sudeikis and so that’s why part of me is like a little bit antenna up because I’m like, You are such a nice guy. It would be really easy for you to do something like this and nobody would think that you know, like I would trunk because I know that like have you ever just like been like someone you hated so much are you just like wanting to get back at so much and thought about like when the time is right like this is when I wait like 10 years for the right opportunity..

Hoja Lopez 

I want to foster this.

Mohanad Elshieky  24:02

Are you asking me if I ever think about revenge? One of my favorite things ever? No, I never imagined it at all not on the million year I do not think about revenge never.

Kiki Monique 

I think I would have enough like I hold on to stuff enough and I have enough patience that I could wait like a good 10 years and then be like, gotcha.

Hoja Lopez

I will say there are some people in high school that I think I would wait to do something nasty to a little nastiness from Hoja Lopez to you. A little nasty. Oh wait, no. Okay. There is one person for my adulthood that I would be, that I would take revenge after 10 years. But I’ve got to I think I may already be by just being extremely happy and successful.

Kiki Monique 

Do we get to know who this person is?

Mohanad Elshieky 

You know what, I’ll say this essay about being successful and all of that. I would say literally nothing makes me work harder. And try like nothing motivates me more than hate. Like a second like nothing, nothing will just feel me than pure hatred. Like if I think my success is like, come back at you or something. I will fucking win an Oscar.

Kiki Monique 

Let somebody use that then. Let’s get you that Oscar. Let’s get this webby next time.

Hoja Lopez 

Oh my god. I used to go to this party called haters make us famous. And I always thought this is the dumbest name for a party. But now I kind of like it in retrospect, you know?

Kiki Monique 

I love that. I might get that tattooed on me.

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, get that tattooed.

Mohanad Elshieky  26:01

Well, speaking of tattoos, I mean, are you gonna tattoo 100k on you since you have 100k Instagram followers now, I mean, there are so many handles you have now probably I mean, you know?

Kiki Monique 

The one thing I’ve learned you don’t get people’s name that you’re dating tattoo because the relationship will go to shit. I know if I get tattooed 100k on me I will get canceled and then I’ll lose every single one of them something’s coming if I do that.

Mohanad Elshieky 

okay, so being canceled that will bring me to the next person I want to talk about which is Taylor Lorenz which she Yes, yeah. Cuz she I mean, I mean, I think a lot of people do know her because she used to cover tech news and whatnot for the New York Times and then now she moved to the Washington Post. And she’s like really in tune with like social media and what’s happening and like tick tock and like trends and about I think she was like on the news lately for writing this article about that. A Twitter account called Libs of TikTok. Did we hear about this. What do we know?

Kiki Monique 

I don’t really know much about it. I’m only I stay off of the Twitter world.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah. So she wrote she wrote an article about it she was like an investigative article about it Libs of TikTok for people who don’t know it, you don’t need to follow it. You don’t need to consume any content, all it does a post video, right wing videos. Okay. And mostly these videos are feature mostly LGBTQ people. So teachers at schools and just like people in general, and talking about like, you know, get like LGBTQ issues. And some teachers are talking about the floor, like don’t say gay bill in Florida. And like, the stuff that kids should be thought in school and all of that. And what it does is it takes us to a […] of this teacher, let’s say talking about gay rights, or like, especially like gay students, and all of that, and it will put a spotlight on them, and would make a wild claim of something like this. This teacher is grooming children.

Hoja Lopez  28:31

They’re doing. I know, it’s bizarre. They’re basically like doing this thing where they just like call out specific teachers. And they rely on that age old, super fucking trans gay phobic trope of like, the if you talk to kids about being gay, that that somehow equates to grooming. And so they’re just making this comparison over and over again, and sort of like, it’s not that they’re not necessarily daxing because they’re not publishing like the, the name. Well, they’re publishing the name, but they’re not publishing like the address and the personal information of that person. But essentially, they’re like, hey, hey, machine, why don’t we all go and focus on this person today?

Mohanad Elshieky 

Exactly. And also, it’s so easy to once you put the name out and the picture and everything for that person to be doxxed. It is terrifying. It gets people death threats, it gets them fired from their jobs, it gets them so much hate and like some of these people are like, you know, like, at least we’re not saying that Taylor like should have to deal with that. I’m saying that at least she does journalist she has like people at her work who like will protect her understand what she was going through and all of that and she’s not gonna get fired for it because they understand the right-wing media mentality. But then you want to come out after like regular people who are now on the internet 24/7 They’re just like people, you just posted a video. There’s like a teacher who’s getting like not getting paid enough for a job or so. And they’re being attacked by this mob basically and they don’t even know how to deal with it. Even like Taylor, who is like a big journalist and like, have dealt with that for so long. It still like weighs on her mentally because it’s fucked up. But she wrote this article about it and then she also identified the person behind the account. And then that’s when the right-wing people like went wild. Wow. And when I say a right-wing people I’m not saying like the just people on the internet. They are too but people like Tucker Carlson and like people on Fox News and, and so many other people, because like these people use her videos on their shows. Joe Rogan talks about those videos and that account on his show, like they made this account famous. So to say, oh, this was just a Twitter account that post videos online and just like seems very harmless. Why are you doing this to her? And you’re like, no, it’s not, you know, the fuck it’s not, you know, this is a hate machine. So she identified the name and people were like, basically, you doxxed this woman.

Hoja Lopez  31:05

Just by revealing who was behind the account? Exactly. Which anybody could find if they were a good journalist, essentially, exactly.

Mohanad Elshieky

The information were available to the public. This person was not doxxed, they put their information outside, it was there, anyone could have looked it up.

Hoja Lopez

And also don’t you isn’t that entire, like, the entire channel or the entire account is to call people out for essentially just existing and being gay as a teacher or being gay in arenas where they don’t feel like you know, being gay is acceptable, essentially, the thing that’s the most I think, just like so annoying is that they then accused Lauren’s of like, of doxing this person and […] who is the person that she reveals his behind the account actually goes on Tucker Carson’s and accuses […] of being like a known hypocrite or just says a bunch of like bullshit about her, and essentially says that she docks his people all the time. So now they’re making it as if Lorenz as a journalist is somebody who doxxs, which is not true.

Mohanad Elshieky  32:13

It’s not true. Also, like, I mean, like doxing people is like a right-wing thing to do. This is like their fame. 100% Yeah, and they also like put in Times Square, they put like the sign that says like, Taylor Lorenz, like dox Libs of TikTok, which is truly an insane thing to do. Because if you’re not all like imagine being a tourist just looking at this and you’re like, Americans are fucking insane. What does this is any of this means? Not a single word here I understand.

Kiki Monique 

They legit bought a whole billboard in Times Square. Yes. Yeah. Bought this billboard.

Mohanad Elshieky

It’s some right-wing people, I don’t even know who it was just like it was insane to me. And I hadn’t had any of this happen to any of you before like you had like some like I mean, Kiki you have a big account like do you have people like who? I know you haven’t been dogs but like people who just like come after you in like a group?

Kiki Monique

I sort of had it wasn’t a big one. It was one that was starting where an account was trying to like accuse me of like stealing some other accounts meme one time. It was like a really weird and I was like, I just shut it down because I was like, I just A, it’s not true and B, like, I’m going to shut it down. So it didn’t go too far.

Mohanad Elshieky

Okay, that’s great. Yeah, sometimes it’s about like not feeding the trolls too, just like you just ignore it and like, let it die down. I mean, I did have that happen to me before because I could like to like in 2019 or so I had this like whole like thread online about like, a bad experience. I had like with the Greyhound bus and border patrol and like, and that became like, a public opinion thing. And it like went super viral. And the oh my god, that was like my first like, experience with like, right-wing people. Oh, wow. Truly the most insane people like the messages I was getting Jesus Christ. So wild. Like people just like obviously a lot of like racist and hateful shit. I’m just like, you know, the classic, like, go back to where you came from, and all of that just like, you know, 2003 racism, I’m just like, please..

Mohanad Elshieky

They should get that tattooed as a generation.

Mohanad Elshieky  34:30

Yeah. Someone was like, are we still doing this? You know, like, just go back to where you came from. I thought that was just like, you know, like, post 9/11 thing that maybe we’ve moved on from and then you know, you have people who are like, would literally just go into all of your shit, like, down to my LinkedIn. Like, I don’t know what they were looking for. But they were like, literally just like trying to prove that I was lying about what I said. And like just like doing like small investigation work and like stuff like that, like people like writing blogs. And also people like writing like, not just blogs like, like, like putting out like YouTube videos or like really just like dissecting what I said, and like doing background check on me and like accusing me of like, so much like wild shit.

Kiki Monique 

Wait, entire YouTube videos to say that what your experience didn’t happen and prove that you were lying?

Mohanad Elshieky 

100%, it was so funny, because two days later, border patrol, like put out a statement and they were just like, yes, this happened and we don’t think we’re wrong. And I was just like, okay, at least you admitted that it did happen. So the psychos will leave me like, at least stop doing this. And you know, like they were like, but it was I mean, it was not just scary. It was like mentally draining, you know, so mentally draining, just like, you know, because I was doing like these interviews with like, reporters and stuff like that, who would just put stuff out and like, even like, even the people who support you, like are not really like they’re putting their spin on it as well. They’re like opinions and whatnot. But I like I did not perform for like two weeks after because I was just like, I’m not gonna be on stage with in front of a group of people. I don’t even know who’s in the crowd.

Hoja Lopez  36:22

It’s so crazy when social media turns into like real life stress. And like, you don’t know who’s gonna come up to you or who’s gonna say what to you? That sounds […]

Mohanad Elshieky

Exactly, exactly. And I’m just like, I did not survive a civil war in Libya for some troll, to shoot me at a comedy show. I’m not gonna die in the most ironic way possible.

Hoja Lopez 

Where it’s like, welcome to America may not be a geopolitical conflict. But we do things a little differently.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Oh, my God. Imagine surviving a civil war to die in a culture war.

Hoja Lopez 

Oh, no.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Oh my God, just because, like because of Twitter. Oh my god, can you imagine? Yeah, like, I’ll be so embarrassed, like, My soul will like I would never become a ghost because like, I would never come back.

Hoja Lopez 

How dare you show your face after that.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Okay, well, now we move on to my favorite segment of every week, which is sorry, not sorry, where we either apologize to someone, or we asked for an apology. And like every week, I’m gonna start with Kiki. So who are we demanding an apology from this week?

Kiki Monique 

This week, I want an apology from my friend Julian. He knows who he is.

Mohanad Elshieky  

Yeah, because you said his name.

Kiki Monique 

That’s the reason. I was really, you guys have been talking about that movie, everywhere. everything all at once is everything everywhere, everything everywhere all at once. And I’ve been wanting to see this. And so I was excited because Alamo which is like my favorite theater because you can drink. They had like an 11:15am show that had like two seats perfect together. And I was like, awesome. Booked it. And I always buy two seats when I you know, booked movies. And then I couldn’t find anyone to go with me because everybody’s like, I’m busy. So that was like, oh, I guess I’ll just go alone. But then I was like, oh, let me check with Julian. And he was like, oh, yeah, like I can, you know, I’m free. I just gotta like, you know, jump in the shower or whatever. So like, cool. I was like, it starts at you know, I think I said 11. Just because I like to give that little extra. And he’s like, okay, cool. So then he’s like, oh, I can pick you up on the way and I was like, oh, awesome. Even better. By 10:30. I’m kind of like, oh, I haven’t heard and then I get a text. He’s like, sorry, he has a Tesla. So he’s like, had to stop and charge my car and I was like, okay, well, okay, I should be there by because I should be there by 11 I think he said 11 I was like, well, then I don’t think we’re going to make the movie. I mean, the movie starts at 11:15 and still it’s gonna take 10 minutes. Anyways, so we did not make the movie and this is how I ended up, brunch which led to the a lot of drinking that day. So I want an apology from Julian because my Saturday was supposed to be a simple movie.

Mohanad Elshieky 

I’ll say this you know; I mean yes, Julian obviously owes you an apology. But more than anyone is Elon Musk for his fucking Tesla’s.

Hoja Lopez 

your car.

Mohanad Elshieky

Yeah, would not let you watch the movie, which is again, truly classic.

Mohanad Elshieky  40:05

Hoja, what’s happening? What’s happening with you?

Hoja Lopez 

You know, this week, I’m in LA again. And last time, as you know, I apologize to LA for being fat. And I like accepted my apology. They were like, it’s fine. If you have to be here. That’s cool. But this time, guess what the tables have turned. I’m asking for an apology from LA Los Angeles. Because mainly, mainly, I’ve just noticed a few things about this place, essentially, that it’s like a series of waiting in lines, not figuring out figuring out where to park I’ve wasted 50% of my time here figuring out where I’m parking. And then also, I do like this part that it’s a series of compliments of people complimenting me. So LA, you don’t have to apologize about that. But then also, people pay for each other’s food here all the time. Have you ever noticed that?

Kiki Monique 

Hasn’t happened to me. Well, I mean, it has happened to me, but like, how often is this happening to you?

Hoja Lopez

It’s just happened to me all week. I was like, it felt like, well, I paid for somebody one time and then other that people have been paying for my food. And I’m like, well, thank you very much to that. All the way to this I’m sorry, apology that we were talking about initially, I’m just telling you about my LA trip. But I would yes, I would like the apology for the parking and the lines, again, so much time, just waiting in lines for an assortment of different things. We don’t have that in Chicago.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Yeah, that’s what I hated about living in Portland. Literally lines everywhere. People just love lines. They just fucking love standing in lines and waiting for stuff. And I just like to arrive at a place and just go in and get a table. That’s it. That’s right. I don’t like to wait. I don’t like to wait. Just

Hoja Lopez 

I just need a little simple counter service and sit at the table and have them give me my food. What about you, Mo?

Mohanad Elshieky 

Well, I mean, yeah, speaking of Portland, I was. So I one thing I like to do is every now and then I would go on my Facebook and I will check the memory thing just to see like what have been posted through the years on that day. Yeah, it’s a way for me honestly, just to see like, you know what? Sometimes I’m like, oh, maybe like, I posted a joke or something that I can like, you know, in cooperated my act or somebody gives me an idea of, you know, you never know. And sometimes I just want to see what’s you know, what I’ve been, old me have been up to during that time. So I was I was reminded of this from my Facebook, this is me kind of like half apologizing to someone, half asking for an apology from someone I think we’re like, it goes both ways. But so that was before I moved away from Portland. So maybe like late 2018, early 2019 or so, I used to teach a workshop, like a writing workshop, like a comedy thing at a prison in Portland. And it’s kind of like far away. So like, you can’t really like take a bus or anything. So just like I either have someone drive me or take an Uber if I don’t have my car. So this time I took an Uber. And if you know me, you know, I don’t like chatting with Uber drivers.

Kiki Monique 

Uber drivers. Yes, very much.

Mohanad Elshieky 

That’s my whole brand.

Hoja Lopez

Yeah, if I didn’t know that, specifically, That would be the assumption that I would make.

Mohanad Elshieky 

100%. And you know, like also, like, you know, like Uber’s in like Portland, Oregon, are not like other places. So it’s not like, you know, you don’t get to meet people from all around the world who are like driving for these cars. It’s just a dude named Steve. And this dude, like, worked at like finance, and was driving Uber because he wanted to get to meet people and just talk to the, which is just like, you know, I don’t want to do that didn’t sign up for this. I just want to be at where I’m supposed to be. And he would not stop talking to me about the stock market. Like throughout the whole time, and I’m just like, Oh, I do not give a fuck about the stock market. I just want to get to where I’m supposed to. And that’s it. And he just kept talking and talking and talking. And then he asked me what I was up to. And I said nothing much just turning myself in.

Mohanad Elshieky  44:21

Truly the reaction of that, man, the silence you can like hear the silence in the car. It was incredible. That’s amazing. I truly like never seen someone just like face just changes. I think he grew new features on his face. Because like, what is he going to do ask me for what, he doesn’t want to know.

Kiki Monique

No. Because once you know that answer, there’s no turning back.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Exactly. And literally just like the whole time we’re just like just a very silent car ride the whole time. And every time we move or something you like he just like goes tense and I’m just like, just keep driving Steve, it does not matter, and he committed to it, you know? So I’m sorry man, I mean I’m sure you’re still thinking about it and you’re telling the story to people or maybe you’ve seen me do comedy and realized that you’ve been made fun of.

Hoja Lopez 

Yeah, I’m just really glad that you were able to really catalyzed fear and that you were able to really bring it to him.

Mohanad Elshieky 

Oh, yeah, yeah. I do bring fear upon my enemies. That’s definitely a thing.

Hoja Lopez 

It was a small revenge in that moment.

Mohanad Elshieky

Well, one thing we want to try to do now I mean, I enjoyed doing sorry not sorry with you guys buy it also would love to hear from our listeners? I think that would be so much fun. And this is the thing we’re trying to do now is we want people to send us their sorry, not sorry. We can like read on the show. Which they can do throughout so many communication forms we have an email you can send to which is imsorry@lemonadamedia.com. You can do that. You can also DMS on Instagram with your stuff. I mean, you can like even like DM me if you want to whatever way works for you on you can fax us you can use a carrier pigeon that would work too.

Hoja Lopez  46:13

You can send us voice memos explaining like what you need to apologize for or why you think somebody needs to apologize to you. I cannot wait to hear people’s stories and what they think they need to apologize about.

Kiki Monique

It can’t just be us every week that has to feel like they’re owed an apology or that they owe someone an apology so I’m definitely want to hear what everyone else wants to apologize for.

Hoja Lopez 

See you next week everyone.

CREDITS

I’M SORRY is a Lemonada Media Original. The show is produced by Alex McOwen, supervising producer is Kryssy Pease. Our executive producers are Stephanie Wittels Wachs and Jessica Cordova Kramer. Our mix is by Kat Yore and theme music was composed by Xander Singh. If you like this show, please rate and review. And please don’t cancel us. You can find out more about our show at @LemonadaMedia on all social platforms, or follow us on Instagram at @imsorry_podcast. We’ll be back next week and until then be nice, play fair and always say I’m sorry. Thanks for listening!

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