
Wildfires, Fire Hose, Harper
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Sarah gives an update on the LA wildfires from the road. Plus, she comes up with shabbat loopholes, helps a woman stay informed without drowning in news, and coordinates a meet cute between two gay men with a kindred hatred of semen.
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Transcript
SPEAKERS
Tim, Devin, Crystal, Amy, Sarah Silverman, Sender 7, Sender 3, Manta, Toad, Ariella
Sarah Silverman 00:10
Hey everybody, it’s your old pal, Sarah. I’m on the road. I’ve got it cold, but I’m I’m doing well, and I am frustrated and feel guilty. I guess this is what survivor’s guilt is, a little bit to not be in LA where these raging fires are so terrifying, I was FaceTiming with Rory, and he was showing me. It looked like it was snowing out, but it was ash. He packed up the car and got the dogs ready to evacuate, but we ended up not getting called. But it’s funny when you think about what you need to pack. We thought, well, passports, I guess, any money we have and the dogs and their bowls and some food, when it comes down to it, all our stuff is just stuff, and it’s easy for me to say, because I did not lose my home in this fire as of yet, um, but I did lose some parents, and I cleaned out their apartments, and it’s just stuff, pretty much, you know, maybe some art, maybe you’d want to grab art or something that’s valuable or something, even pictures. I just have them on my phone. I can just reprint them. So everything I really need is in my backpack and is Rory and my loved ones. It’s funny. It makes me think of that scene from the jerk when he’s like, all I need is this and my this and this lamp, and then he keeps thinking of more and more and more. That was a terrible rendition, and I’m embarrassed. Anyway, I’m thinking of all of you out in Los Angeles. Geez, Louise, all right, enough of this talking. Let’s take some calls.
Tim 02:36
Hi Sarah, this is Tim. I’m from Regina, Saskatchewan, the city with the terrible name that you made fun of in like, a very early episode, which is fine, because everybody makes fun of it.
Sarah Silverman 02:48
Kicked out of seventh grade for laughing.
Tim 02:50
I now live in Berlin, Germany, and I sure would love it if you’d travel to Europe and do a tour, you would bring a lot of joy, because I love you so much I don’t expect you to, because I know you don’t like travel that much. Take notar was here last year, and I’d like never seen a big name on a poster here. So of course, I bought a ticket, but I couldn’t go because I was working, and it’s like the biggest regret of my life. I can’t believe I fucking missed take notarow. It’s really I cringe when I think about it anyway. I called for a different reason.
Sarah Silverman 03:16
I want to go to Germany.
Tim 03:18
I called to tell you, to tell everyone, that the difference between a million and a billion was made clear to me when I learned the fact that 1 million seconds is 11 days, so like a nice vacation and 1 billion seconds is 32 years. That is the difference between a million and a billion that stuck with me. It’s sort of boggles the mind. So if you had $1 billion you’d need to spend $1 every second for 32 years before you had $0 and no billionaire has $1 billion they also, they all have very many billions of dollars. Anyways, just thought I’d clarify that for y’all, bye.
Sarah Silverman 03:59
I’m so glad you called in to say that, because I saw that too. I saw that somewhere someone was saying the difference between 1 million and 1 billion. Because I think people really don’t really see the difference that much. They know it’s a lot more, but I think people really don’t understand when I say there is no reason for anybody to be a billionaire, you think of being like a communist or something, but it is so far from being a millionaire or even a multi millionaire, it just becomes solely about ego. You cannot spend a billion dollars in your lifetime or your kids lifetimes. Anyone who’s holding on to more than $1 billion is a psychopath, is a hoarder, is greedy, wants to be on a a list of the richest people. All more than on a list of like the most philanthropic people, or more than not giving a fuck about stupid lists, in my opinion, every penny after $1 billion should go back to the government or to a charity of your choice or whatever the fuck holding onto it is literally psychotic. I’m a part of the 1% I’m pretty sure. But when you talk about the 1% of the 1% that is an entirely different echelon, and those people control our government because of Citizens United. So I don’t know how it goes away. I don’t know how we keep from becoming a country that has no middle class anymore, just a handful of extremely, extremely rich oligarchs and poor people. But you know, as I’m saying that I’m like, Well, I guess that’s the reason people want billions and billions. They want control. They want power, but to what end? What do you need? What? Why? How does this feed you? You know, the non billionaire people, people without a lot of money, who voted for Trump will maybe have a rude awakening, maybe, although they may be too married to this unshakable perception of Trump as God or Trump as more likely daddy. I mean, it’s interesting to me, this Trump thing with with like that he’s, he’s like the daddy that didn’t give them love and they want it, you know. And it may seem crazy, but haven’t we all done this in relationship? Certainly in the beginning, you know, we’re not picking the person we want or the person who’s best for us in relationship, we don’t naturally go towards what we want. We go towards what’s familiar. And there’s something familiar about him, in that way that they say in therapy, like your relationships, until you unlearn these things are replaying dynamics with your parents that didn’t go well, and you’re trying to correct it now, but instead of that, you’re gonna just cycle through the same cycles, the same unhealthy cycle. But it’s very true that we don’t go towards what we want. If we were to say what we go towards what is familiar. And that’s why abuse is cyclical. Very often you have to very consciously break those things. Well, that answer went off into entropy as per usual. What else?
Devin 07:54
Hi, Sarah. My name is Devin, and I’m coming from the California Bay Area. This is a response to the caller David, who called, Hi, David. I also don’t like semen. And being a gay male, I’m glad we found each other. In fact, I don’t like it so much that I’m going to ruin it for everyone else. I’ll share my realization that ruined it for me. If you don’t want it ruined, fast forward or stop listening. Okay, this is my realization, the tingling sensation that it gives when it’s on any part of your body. That’s it, trying to find something to fertilize. That’s the little tadpoles crawling everywhere. That’s okay, I gotta breathe. I can’t talk about it. Hi, David. We can hang out sometime. Okay, bye.
Sarah Silverman 08:59
I don’t know if that’s a scientific answer or if it’s your imagination and anxiety, but I mean, maybe it would make sense, but they’re really, really, really small. The sperm, I’m sure yours aren’t. No, I’m just kidding. I would be so excited if this were a love connection between Devon and David. We should probably, like, I don’t know how to see if they want each other’s email addresses or something.
Amy 09:36
Yeah, if they do, we can make it happen.
Sarah Silverman 09:38
Yeah, that would be so I mean, like, what a meet cute. Well, I was listening to my podcast, and David called in saying he hated seamen, and I too hated seamen. So we, we met. That would be so cool. You’ll just like, um, please each other, and then each. Speculate into like, just straight into the trash.
Sender 3 10:10
Hi, Sarah. This is your friend from Washington, DC. I just wanted to first say how much I value and appreciate you, how much you love people and pets, your heart and kindness and thoughtfulness responding to people’s calls is so evident, and listening to your podcast just feels like a giant hug in this weary world. So thank you. Oh, that makes me feel so nice. Yeah. So here we are after the election. I’m a proud public servant, and I work so hard along with my colleagues, so to hear us villainized is exhausting and tough, and my young adult children are members of the LGBTQ plus community, so I really want to make sure that they’re safe and loved and can be who they fully are. Just working really hard to stay focused on my community and loving and doing for my loved ones and community members and those who will be the most vulnerable over the next several years. I have a practical question for you, how can I still stay informed, but without drinking from a fire hose and drowning in news? I remember that first term and how the first thing I do in the morning was look at the news to see what the fuck happened today, I’m off social media, and that helps, but wondering what your news ingestion plan is for the next four years and how you plan to balance being informed with ensuring you’re not drowning in 24/7 anxiety inducing news barrage. Thank you, Sarah. Love you, so grateful for you.
Sarah Silverman 11:30
Well, first of all, I don’t think I’ve ever heard that, or maybe I never really thought about it, drinking from a fire hose. That’s That’s great. You touched on a lot of it, maybe without knowing but I, too, am trying to be as helpful and supportive as possible in vulnerable community. You know, in various vulnerable communities that are gonna really need help in the next four years and probably beyond, I also really have been opting out in a big way in terms of news ingestion. I just, you know, and I think I’ve said this for a few weeks now, I don’t want to read your think piece. I don’t want to hear about who Trump’s putting in his cabinet. I don’t, want to know right now. I really because, well, it’s kind of like that Eckhart now, is it Eckhart Tolle or Eckhart Tolle? Who knows, but it’s like, if you don’t like, what’s going on, leave if you can’t leave. Option two is, stay and change it. If you can’t change it. Option three is complete acceptance. I’m hoping we can change it. I don’t want to leave. I love America. I love the United States. I don’t want to leave. So can I change it? I do think community is going to be and that’s what you touched on. But I think you were like wanting to be there for the vulnerable communities. I think also our salvation is going to be in community. I think a lot of people are going to be stepping up, and it’s all going to be about allies and community coming together and taking care of each other, which is, I like to think is our purpose as humans, besides like creating machine and then going extinct, but, um, I think our salvation is going to be community, stepping up and taking care of each other, and that’s why I think we’re here to experience that for now. Well, while there is not much I in this moment where we’re feeling helpless. I don’t need to be taking in every day’s atrocities like, you know, like I just don’t I’m not saying that’s what everyone should do. I’m saying this is my survival skill at play, right here is I don’t want to know right now I’m gathering my strength. I do not want to give them my health. And I can feel it when I do delve into the news and the daily fucking bullshit. I feel my health. I can feel it. It’s not good. I feel it in my body, the stress, the anxiety, and I I don’t want to do that right now. And hey, I have that luxury, and I’m keenly aware of it, but as soon as there is something that I can do, and in many ways, I’m just putting my money where my mouth is or isn’t right now. You know, I’m I just did, like all the the year end putting I have a fund within my, you know, savings that is in Jewish and not all Jews do this, and a lot of non Jews do this, but it’s a thing to give at least 10% of everything you make away. And I like to do that. So pushing money out where it can be useful to smarter people that have systems in place, that’s what you can do, and you don’t have to look at the news right now, if you do want to, I think PBS tends to be PBS News Hour tends to be pretty honest, and even, or just dip into different ones. We will put on this channel on DirecTV, which I don’t know why we still have, and Rory is just like, why do we have this? Why are we paying for this? But I still watch TV sometimes, and we’ll watch news mix, which has like six different news channels on at the same time, and you can click on which one you want audio on, including, I think it’s like we have like, CNN, Fox News, MSNBC, BBC, and I think a couple others. You know, Rory likes to know what’s being said on conservative channels and stuff. And I think that’s really smart, but then you got to turn it off, you know, just only take doses you can handle. Only be informed, what you need to be informed and you don’t need to right now. I mean, whatever. Take some time, you know, take care of yourself. Don’t give them your health. All right. What else?
Ariella 16:29
Hi, Sarah. This is Ariella, your neighborhood vocal coach, or as I’ve called myself for 19 years, vocal empowerment coach. That is not that I’m outside the sound that you hear. My cat is currently fascinated by cat TV, okay, so what is vocal fry? Vo, and I’m just, I just did a little bit of it. What is vocal fry? Vocal fry is when two things happen, when the vocal cords are relaxed enough, and then we’re not also letting much breath support our voice, so we’re lacking breath, and we’re also relaxing, and then this sound comes like totally right? And I think the reason people don’t like it, although we all do it often at the end of sentences or first thing in the morning. We all do it sometimes, but it can sound apathetic, it can sound lazy, it can sound like we don’t care. That’s what it is, and partially because we aren’t allowing much air through. And that’s not always the case. It’s just a pattern some people get into for singing and for speaking and so definitely, if anyone’s concerned about it, reach out to a vocal coach, study it. You can totally do less vocal fry. All right. Thank you for everything you do. Sarah and all your listeners.
Sarah Silverman 17:57
Thank you, Ariella, I’ve never heard vocal fry in singing. Is that even possible? Because it’s so much about breath control, I might give you a call. I really I should take the time to be in a voice class, because I need better breath control, as Charles and Isabella here would tell you, I for some reason, when we do ads, it didn’t happen today, but I’ll get an asthma attack, or I can’t, like, breathe, and maybe it’s just because I’m like, reading, talking and not thinking and not pausing, or I don’t know, it’s so bizarre, it only happens when I’m doing ads. It doesn’t happen while I’m yakking in this part of the podcast, and it happened, which really was scary, early on the road of this tour, I had a couple asthma attacks on stage, and just kind of powered through them because I didn’t want the audience to feel bad, but it was very hard to get air in and out, and I have an inhaler. I’ve been doing it right before I go on. But I don’t know what it is. It’s breath control, I think. And, you know, I always was a, you know, a natural singer with, I don’t want to brag, but perfect pitch. And now I’m having a harder time. I have a much smaller range. I’m not a professional singer, but I’m not, you know, I’m not taking class, a class. I’m not working on that. And I just did a show with at Largo, with Colin Hay, who you guys may remember from men at work, and also his, you know, solo career ever since his voice is unbelievable. You know, there are some singers that, as they get older, their voice is better, very few, though. Colin Hay is one. Elvis Costello is one. I mean, he’s hitting notes. His voice is so rich, it’s gorgeous. I go. How do you still have that, that gorgeous voice? It’s like, better than ever. He’s like, oh, I take scene lessons. I take voice lessons. You know, they all do, like Barbra Streisand, does? I remember hearing, you know, it’s like she, you know? And of course, she does. That’s her tool. That’s her whole thing. But you always go, well, they’re pros, and they’re they have a gift. No, they do have a gift, but they have to work at it, and it’s so much as like breath control and all that shit. And I should do it. I really need to, and probably don’t smoke as much weed, but that’s not an option. What are the Eckhart Tolle options? All right, what else?
Crystal 20:43
Hi, Sarah. This is Crystal. I love you, obviously, otherwise I wouldn’t be calling I’m wonder. I don’t have social media, so I haven’t really gotten any notice. If you have done any shows in LA lately. I am in LA, but I’m wondering if you’re ever going to do any shows that aren’t on Shabbos, maybe like a weekday show for your orthodox girl over here, all right, let me know. Love you, bye.
Sarah Silverman 21:11
Yes, most of my my Largo shows tend to be on Fridays, um, but there are occasional Saturdays and Thursdays and other days. But couldn’t you come on a Friday? Just hear me out, go with a non Jewish friend who drives, you know, a shabbos goy, if you will. And isn’t that how you like watch TV and stuff, or you turn it on before sundown. You know, it’s, this is like TV, but it’s live. I mean, you can’t get closer to God than when you’re laughing and you’re sitting, you’re relaxed. It’s not work. I don’t know. I’m not really good with the rules of that. I think, yeah, you have to, like you turn the lights on before the sun goes down, so you’re not even turning on lights. And that’s, those are the rules of the Sabbath. You are not to work. Do anything that could be you don’t even press buttons on an elevator. So, yeah, maybe that’s the thing. But there’s always, you know, these always loopholes. Or maybe you you know my dad, you know we had no religion, and then here he is. He has all these grandkids that are religious because my sister became a rabbi. And so when my dad would watch them, he’d be like, No, this is a Shabbos TV. This is a Shabbos tabux. This is a Shabbos car. He did Shabbos, and he would just tell the kids like, No, this is a special for you know, but he just made it up. There was a comedian, Stu Trivex, who is observant. So even when he was like, doing really well and headlining, he couldn’t, he wouldn’t do shows on Friday. I bet Elon gold probably doesn’t do shows on Friday. I think Sandy Koufax wouldn’t play on Fridays. And anyway, hope you come to see me sometime when, when you can, when God will allow.
Manta 23:18
Hey, Sarah, this is Manta checking in after a call beforehand where I talked about being trans and having parents who don’t quite understand it, and I want to thank you and the other caller who gave such kind responses and ask you if you’ve seen the documentary will and Harper, where Will Ferrell and his old friend Harper go on a road trip around America, and Harper’s trans and they navigate that territory of A desire for connection, but an uncertainty about language, I thought you might enjoy it, and I would love to know what you think about it. And thank you for being such a great listener again, amidst a lot of noise and silencing. Okay, bye.
Sarah Silverman 24:22
Thanks for calling back in Manta. I am two thirds of the way in. Why would I stop watching it? I because I was on a plane and it landed, and I was so bummed, so I have to watch the last like third of it. It’s so good, so beautiful, so funny, so real, and what a great opportunity. You know, it was like Harper had been friends with Will Ferrell for many years before she transitioned. And I knew her before she transitioned, and she was not someone you would ever go. I bet that person is. Gonna transition. And as a matter of fact, I was friends with Harper’s girlfriend. And anyway, it’s so good, it’s so beautiful. And so they they, Harper tells will in an email, I’m transitioning. I’m, this is something I’ve always felt, you know, I am, that I was a woman, and that this is, you know, blah. And, of course, will was amazing and, and they decided to take this road trip because Harper as her former self, or, you know, the way she kind of says it, like the character she played. Loved the holes in the wall, bars and this, the seedy places and the alleyways of Americana like the back road places in America, and had driven cross country many times, and loved going to games and little CD bars, and wanted to do it again, and realized that as a woman now, those places may not be at all safe places for her, and so they decided to take a road trip together, and that she would be with this famous man as her as her kind of sidekick, navigating all this stuff again, but for the first time, as her authentic self. And it’s really great. And Harper was so open and kind of, you know, encouraging will to ask her anything, and talking with their mutual older friends and you just, it’s just really, really good. I’m friends with a young man who is trans, and he met Harper at something I had recently, and he said it was really transformative and inspiring and special to meet her, and especially for him, and that, you know, she was very open and gave her number and stuff. And, you know, lately, I’ve really come to realize that any kind of adversity we face, community is our savior now more than ever. This is, this is me saying words, but I really think that it’s, it’s true and is going to be true, you know, kind of more than ever. But definitely check out Harper and Will and Harper. All right, what else?
Sender 7 27:41
Hi, Sarah. We admire your ability to tackle tough subjects with humor and insight on your podcast. Growing up, my parents gave me and my brother the wisdom of concealment when it came to our Jewish identity, especially on the road, we were told never mention you’re Jewish while you’re traveling. And if we were ever to pack in a menorah, it was suitcase only never carry on, because, you know, nothing says holiday spirit like hiding the menorah. I’m curious. When you were growing up, did you ever get to conceal your identity talk, especially while traveling?
Sarah Silverman 28:19
No, but you know, my parents, we weren’t wildly observant, and all we really knew about being Jewish was that it was what made us different. My sister Susie always says like we thought being Jewish men being a Democrat, because that’s how we were different in New Hampshire, I didn’t ever get a talk like that from my parents. Nothing. I didn’t. They weren’t wildly involved, but I did get have an instinct, and I’ve talked about before, to that I look back as a kid and realize I had this instinct to make my friends parents feel that I was a safe person to be around. It’s funny because my friend Brian, who is black and he had a very similar instinct as a kid, and that’s given us a skill as comedians, in a way, but it’s as we look back we understand it more and also just the I think there are so many Jews, black people, Hispanic people, Arab people, all sorts of minorities that. But we bond on like, just whenever there’s a monster in the news, you know, who murdered a bunch of people or raped people, or, you know, it’s like, our first instinct is like, Oh, my God, please don’t be Jewish, you know, please don’t be black. Please don’t be Mexican, whatever, you know, we you know. I mean, listen, we’re living in a time where you hear Weinstein Epstein. These are very Jewish names attached to actual monsters, powerful, rich monsters. And it’s, as we say, bad for the Jews, but so many minorities kind of experience that same kind of dread. All right, what else?
Toad 30:12
Hey, Sarah, Hey, Amy, your friend, Toad. So sorry. I missed you guys in Philadelphia. I was going for the flu, and everybody’s really looking forward to going to show so I was kind of down, and I was looking up, like, where else is Sir gonna be? And I saw, in like, January, you’re gonna be in Manhattan. And I hate driving in Manhattan, so I’m like, oh, where else you’re gonna be? And I saw in February gonna be in Waterloo New York. I’m like, where the hell is Waterloo New York? So I’m just Googling it. And then my phone starts ringing. It was, like, 10 o’clock, and I’m like, Who the hell is calling me? And it was my good friends, Chelsea and Becky, and you were in the background, just to say hi.
Sarah Silverman 30:44
That’s right.
Toad 30:45
Wishing me, you know, speed of recovery. So I felt like a maker wish kid. And I was like, Man, am I like, stage four flu? Is this how they tell you? So it really made my night. And I appreciate you so much. And I was just wondering, um, like, in Chelsea were saying that they had a really good time. And just given like the subject matter of the tour and the name of the tour, how are you doing with everything? I mean, is it like therapeutic for you to to be doing this? Is it cathartic, or is it just like exhausting? Is it like a emotional toll every day because you’re doing this 30 times? You know, it’s got to be difficult to be talking about this over and over again, so I just hope you’re doing well, Sarah, and I love you so much. And again, thank you guys so much for the call.
Sarah Silverman 31:27
Toad, I love you, yeah. So for the listeners, Toad, Chelsea and Becky, I know because the last time I went on tour, they all listened to the podcast, and Toad called in and said, I have tickets for Atlantic City. I have two tickets, but I don’t have anyone to go with. And then two different callers, Chelsea and Becky, called in to say, well, I want to go. So we got all three of them tickets, and I met them after the show, and I and they didn’t know each other. They were three totally separate, people who only had listening to my podcast in common, and they met last time. They had dinner beforehand, and they really stayed friends. And it just makes me so happy. So they were all coming again, but Chelsea and Becky came, and they came backstage, and they told me Toad had the flu, and so we, we called him to check in on him and stuff. And I love that. I mean, listen, don’t like call in and think you’re that will happen, but it would, it happened, and it was great. And, yeah, it’s you know, the show’s about my parents dying. And, I mean, it’s funny first, I hope. But it is, yeah, it’s both of those things. It’s hard, it’s a it’s a little hard every night, but it’s also very cathartic, and I think I’ll be really happy when I’m finished with it, but I’ll miss it too and a little bit as well. But let me know if you wanted to come to Waterloo, but I guess let the podcast know, and I’ll I’ll make sure to say hello. I think that is my very last night on tour. All right, Toad, see you next time, dad, wherever you are, we are winding down. This is part of the podcast when I say, send me your questions or comments or thoughts or opinions or complaints or ideas. I just I would love to hear from you go to speakpipe.com/theSarahSilvermanpodcast that speakpipe.com/thesarahsilvermanpodcast. And subscribe, rate and review wherever you listen, podcast that helps us, and there is more you heard it more of the Sarah Silverman Podcast with Lemonada Premium subscribers get exclusive access to bonus questions like, when about which divas I’ve met? Ooh, what divas have I met? Subscribe now on Apple podcasts. Thank you for listening to the Sarah Silverman podcast, we are a production of Lemonada media. Kathryn Barnes and Isabella Kulkarni produce our show. Our mix is by James Sparber. The show is recorded at the Invisible Studios in West Hollywood. Charles Carroll is our recording engineer. Additional Lemonada support from Steve Nelson, Stephanie Wittels Wachs and Jessica Cordova Kramer. Our theme was composed by Ben Folds. You can find me at @SarahKateSilverman on Instagram. Follow the Sarah Silverman podcast wherever you get your podcasts, or listen ad free on Amazon music with your Prime membership.